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Joined: 12/9/2006
Msg: 19
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Demi Moore/Bruce Willis divorce, if you could, would you?Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)
If it was a neighbor, friend, co-worker I might believe it but when the source is People Magazine. No.
Joined: 4/8/2008
Msg: 22
Demi Moore/Bruce Willis divorce, if you could, would you?
Posted: 1/28/2009 8:20:11 PM
Unfortunately it is not a common pattern these days. I still have good relationship with my ex and his sis but kids are not involved here.
Joined: 1/17/2009
Msg: 23
Demi Moore/Bruce Willis divorce, if you could, would you?
Posted: 1/28/2009 8:34:49 PM
if i could, i would.

my 1st ex and i did not get along and only in recent years have we toned it down to 'civil'.

it was because of that experience that i initiated the 2nd divorce quickly. i wanted us to stay friends before the relationship devolved into adversarial roles like the 1st divorce. #2 and i were together for 10 years and two girls. (one boy with #1)

i was lucky enough to win custody both times (because guys do have to overcome courtroom prejudices) but with #2 i know it was only because we stayed friends. there was no way the court was giving me my girls if she was going to fight me (for the sake of fighting me like #1 did).

i think exposure to the antics of #1 also helped #2 be realistic and truthful to herself about what she wanted and what she wanted out of life, i.e. she had more maturity than #1. she and i are very good friends and we still treat each others' families like we were still married, i.e. still family, which they are and always will be to our kids.

so seeing both ends of the spectrum definitely makes me want to "get along" with the ex like demi/bruce. people forget, spouses may stop being spouses, but kids don't have that option. it's a life sentence for them. they're stuck with us for life!

but with no kids involved? then ex-spouses would be old acquaintances imo. like ex-gf's or ex-bf's would/should be. jmo
 My I
Joined: 1/23/2007
Msg: 24
Demi Moore/Bruce Willis divorce, if you could, would you?
Posted: 1/28/2009 9:13:40 PM

My youngest son's Father and I are like this currently. He will drop our son off after their weekend together, and stay for a tea & a visit. We still email or chat on the phone, and our conversations extend beyond our son. We are not interested in getting back together, but we both love our son to pieces and wish for him to grow & thrive in that love.
I'm not in love with my ex, but I care about his well being & his happiness. We help one another out when we can.

The thing is, neither of us are involved with anyone at the moment. I'm not sure that our relationship will be viewed very positively by a potential romantic interest, I'm sure it would take a mature sort for sure!

^^^^ Imagine how many threads wouldn't be in existence if all divorced couples got along like that?

I was in a relationship where her ex would stay at her house with their son and I would have her at my house for the weekend. I had no problem with that because I recognized what motivates them to be so cordial and open with each other. On several ocassions we had dinner and drinks together - he was a good cook.

In all honesty, I think that put my girlfriend (at the time) in seventh heaven because she had the best of both worlds. She was able to be a mom, a girlfriend and someone's exwife.... all drama free.

I appreciated it as well.
Joined: 2/4/2006
Msg: 26
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Demi Moore/Bruce Willis divorce, if you could, would you?
Posted: 1/28/2009 9:57:12 PM
Well, the family I spoke of actually is having a fairy tale romance. The man loves the woman, she loves him, they like spending time together. The man loves all three of her kids and they love him, and the woman loves him more because he truly loves and likes her kids. He told me that if they ever did break up he would never sever his ties to the kids. So, I guess it is a fairy tale ending for the man marrying into this if one considers that he has a wonderful family that he loves and that he can love these kids unconditionally because all of the other grown-ups involved actually conduct themselves like mature adults.

In the world many of us live in, people break up and because it makes no one the bad guy, there is no reason to avoid an X as if he has some sort of communicable disease. I tend to think that people who feel the need to wipe someone's existence from their lives is not really over them.
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