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Joined: 9/10/2007
Msg: 13
Bullish or Bearish Dating Market ... Page 3 of 3    (1, 2, 3)

What if you met this great person that you really would like to date. If they had a job that seemed to be on the job cut list would you begin/continue to date them, or would you play the wait and see game???
If I lost my job, I don't think I'd be all that interested in pursuing a romance.,. the stress of paying my mortgage would leave me tense and distracted. My whole focus would be on getting my situation under control. I wouldn't feel confident, secure, or optimistic. That's not a healthy state of mind to being a new relationship.
If I was dating a man with iffy job prospects, I wouldn't be surprised if he said he needed "space".

A number of my friends are worried... many are experiencing huge down-turns in their businesses, seeing their colleagues laid off, watching their investment shrivel. This doesn't mean they don't want to date... it means a lot of the frivolous nonsense of dating is exactly that: frivolous nonsense most don't have the energy or desire to tolerate. Real connections, yes... wasting time playing "the game" no.
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 20
Bullish or Bearish Dating Market ...
Posted: 1/29/2009 2:20:27 PM

This is where I can set back and laugh until my sides hurt. I have been technically retired since 1999. 26 years old, shy of 27 and I get laid up with a disability (no job/ work because of the disability).

Ok so you can't work. That's different from being able to work and not finding (or in some cases wanting to) work.

So what makes me undatable because I have no job? I'm still the same person I have been since I was born. 36 years older, a bit wiser, and still living life whether the rich get richer or try to, and the poor continue to stay poor.

Again, it's mindset - in your case it doesn't apply, because I am sure you'd work if you could. That excludes you to some extent.

I would give you a ride in my 2000 truck, but I wasn't worth talking to when you had a job and big bucks, why would you talk to me now? I sort of like the saying about the shoe being on the other foot.

I have a 1999 truck, what does getting a ride in someone else's car have to do with anything? Again, mostly it's about my mindset about not working - not what someone has - which I never said anything about.

Someone can have all the toys in the world, but it doesn't make me want to talk to them any more than someone that has nothing. Actually it makes me want to back away and RUN FOREST RUN!

Yeah, we agree on this. Why did you quote me again? When I say healthy to date, I mean emotionally, functionally, productively. I could care less what someone has, just what I have.

Strip away a person's job, house, car/s, material things what do you have? A basic person. Now that you're a basic person we can talk!

I don't disagree.

djchickie401: I hate to say it, but I smell occupational desperation.
You know...........
Kinda like that desperation that women smell on a man that's been single way too long!

Huh? You'll have to explain that one.

If unemployment takes you out of the dating mindset, that's fine. Just keep in mind that it doesn't affect your value as a good date!

Most times, I don't have a dating mindset anyway, I just have less of one now than I did before, that's all.

In this kind of market, I don't hold it against someone if they are unemployed. Shyt happens!

I don't hold it against anyone else either. I do hold it against myself tho, and in that case, I'm no good in a dating situation. My heart's not in it (not that it really ever is).

I don't think that occupation status equals date worthiness and kinda think it shallow of someone that would make that equation.

It does to me. Until I am working and functioning and taking care of myself to my standards, I am not fit to date. I am not whole. I am extremely distracted. Just the way I am. To me, survival comes before frivolity. No one takes care of me but me, so when that's threatened - frankly I can't concentrate on much else.

Kind of like considering someone undateable because they are homeless. Yet the reason for them being homeless, is because a hurricane just came through and took it away!

I would be surprised a homeless person would even notice dating, let alone want to do's about where your priorities are. Not "would someone date you" but "would you even be in the right mind to BE dating when you just lost everything?" It'd stand to reason that you'd be more interested in piecing your life back together than finding someone to go out with on a Saturday night. One is imperative and one can really wait a while.

A person's intentions come through fairly quickly. So, unemployed due to circumstances vs unemployed due to choice, are readily apparent in short order. The person that isn't working because they don't wanna work and want someone to take care of them will have a different attitude from the person that's used to/ and desires to take care of themself.

Exactly, which means that those who are overly comfortable with being unemployed tend to be those who chose it, not those who would work but can't find any. It should truly bother them to the point where they'd not enjoy themselves as much until they feel things are improving, and if it didn't bother them, I'd find it sort of a red flag - because it bothers me when I am in that situation.
Joined: 9/16/2007
Msg: 21
view profile
Bullish or Bearish Dating Market ...
Posted: 1/29/2009 2:20:46 PM
Yea, but at with gas at $1.55 people can afford to long-distance date like they haven't for about a decade. Since the area increases as the square of the radius, prospects could concievably have increased geometrically.

Plus, with the restaurants nearly empty I've found the service, courtesy, etc. of the wait-staffs to be at an all time high level.

So it's not all gloom and doom. Especially if you turn off your TV, seeing as how much they love and profit from misfortune.
Joined: 1/20/2009
Msg: 24
view profile
Bullish or Bearish Dating Market ...
Posted: 1/29/2009 3:05:05 PM

it means a lot of the frivolous nonsense of dating is exactly that: frivolous nonsense most don't have the energy or desire to tolerate.

GOOD!!! Maybe we can get back to the meat and potatoes of it for a lil while and pass up on the quadruple espresso n Red Bull dates?!?!?!?
Joined: 1/3/2009
Msg: 35
view profile
Bullish or Bearish Dating Market ...
Posted: 1/29/2009 9:38:57 PM
Bear or Bull doesn't really matter. Maybe what put it into perspective for me was surviving combat while close friends didn't. The randomness of who lived and who died made me appreciate every day and every opportunity I get now. The only way a job would be a consideration is if they just wanted to sit on their rear and be taken care of. Makes me think they would just put everything else getting done on my shoulders too. That situation just has no appeal at all.
Joined: 4/19/2007
Msg: 43
view profile
Bullish or Bearish Dating Market ...
Posted: 1/30/2009 1:01:52 AM
Sounds like it's time to get a good bargain. Hopefully, this means people's expectations will lower, so my chances will improve.
Joined: 9/22/2008
Msg: 49
view profile
Bullish or Bearish Dating Market ...
Posted: 2/2/2009 4:39:05 PM
Guess this is a bad time to tell the OP I work in the auto industry, LOL.
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