Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > UK forums  > Self esteem and injured pride...      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 stoowart
Joined: 7/19/2005
Msg: 1
view profile
History
Self esteem and injured pride...Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)
Where exactly is the line on this kind of thing?

I mean, for example....A guy meets a girl they see each other for about a week then one realises it's not really for them and breaks it off...

Perhaps this breakpoint wasn't made as gently as it could have been but sometimes these things aren't easy to do gently, are they?

Anyhoo point in question is..ok, you may be hurt by it, you may suffer from a sudden drop in self-esteem, your pride may be hurt and you may harbour thoughts of 'payback' for your 'imagined injuries' etc but where do you draw the line on this and your 'crazy thoughts?

Discuss ^^
 stoowart
Joined: 7/19/2005
Msg: 2
view profile
History
Self esteem and injured pride...
Posted: 2/7/2009 3:21:29 AM
Yay! I can post again! thank you for the rapid response guys :)

No! this is not me i'm talking about lol god no!

but i was waiting for something to go on before expanding...hang on lemme read over what you've all said...

Yes, good replies...what it is it really isn't me if i'm unwanted then i'm unwanted...you can lead a horse to water etc etc...maybe i'll hurt breifly and maybe even feel like lashing out if it's me in such a situation but you limit the time you give yourself to wallow...that's if you even feel the need to, then you close that box and put it way huh?

I just happen to know of someone who has been put in a situation where the guy can't seem to let go and thought peoples thoughts on such could be helpful for both parties involved...again, thank you for the rapid and well said replies here

stu :)
 badge73
Joined: 1/17/2009
Msg: 3
view profile
History
Self esteem and injured pride...
Posted: 2/7/2009 10:15:58 AM
Didnt you manage to give her one then pw?
 badge73
Joined: 1/17/2009
Msg: 4
view profile
History
Self esteem and injured pride...
Posted: 2/7/2009 12:54:56 PM
An the reason for caps is ...
 stoowart
Joined: 7/19/2005
Msg: 5
view profile
History
Self esteem and injured pride...
Posted: 2/9/2009 3:42:50 AM
Have to agree with sev of the posts about having built things up over time online and then when reality ends up biting it's a bit of a blow, been there a few times myself :)

I've come to the conclusion on that, that no amount of 'virtual time' and 'sweet' tex messages and fone chats etc etc are a replacement for actually sitting in the same 'actual' place and interracting just like we all used to in the 'good old days' ....spending real time and getting to know each other is the only real way to success in these things.

Even then of course you still run the risk of 'hurt' at a later date but at least you aren't building something up like a house of cards to have it come tumbling down first time you meet...funny thing is I think that if you actually do spend time with a person getting along for real then the 'letdown' aspect if one comes is probably easier to deal with because the whole thing was real and in front of you not some 'virtual dreamscape'

'shrugs' :) it's a funny old game eh? ^^
Show ALL Forums  > UK forums  > Self esteem and injured pride...