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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > Women question a man over 50 and not been married?      Home login  
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 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 409
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?Page 21 of 25    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25)

it is about the never married one who never took that 'next step' to propose and marry his woman.


Actually, it's about people who take one fact and assume things about a person based on it. It is possible that a proposal was declined or that the fiance died prior to the wedding day. There are other possibilities, but people on here seem to prefer making snap judgments based upon their favorite stereotype.
 Scarlettmagnolia
Joined: 3/25/2013
Msg: 410
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 6/30/2013 6:00:57 PM
I don't see that it is a problem, but I know where you are coming from. I am over 50 and have never been married and people treat me like I am a freak. Like you, I have never found Mr. Right. As much as I would like to be married, I would have rather been single than gone through failed marriages. Most people who are questioning you probably have. If they can't accept you because you have never been married, they are shallow and it is their loss.
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 411
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 6/30/2013 7:07:00 PM

I don't view divorce as a failed marriage- 2 people got together for a reason & spent some time in a relationship & parted ways.


Of course not, because then the finger of judgment would be pointed at you.
 Halcyon_Skies
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 412
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 6/30/2013 7:21:07 PM
I think many single non-cohabitating ever people are that way because...they may be nice people....great friends...but they are just not "partner" material- they may be single by choice, or because no one has ever wanted them as a partner.


Careful, pretty_patterson---you might offend a few delicate sensibilities with that sentiment.
 Paderic
Joined: 2/23/2010
Msg: 413
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 7/1/2013 6:20:01 AM
Some people who have been married suck at being a partner, too. Which is why they got divorced. But that doesn't mean someone who is divorced sucks at being a partner simply because they are divorced. It's just as ignorant to make that kind of judgment about a single person.

I always try to keep in mind that I don't know what I don't know.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 414
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 7/2/2013 5:44:24 PM
I believe people are shaped by and learn from their experiences in life.

I can usually tell if someone has never been married, been divorced or have been widowed. Widowed and still married are a little the same.

Friends of mine that went to the Vietnam war were a little different when they returned. Women that were raised by two intact parents are a little different from those who's parents went through a divorce.

These are not hard and fast differences, there will always be those that don't follow a predictable pattern. But FBI profiles and marketing agencies all make use of the same sorts of tendencies when they profile someone or advertize to different segments of the population. It works most of the time but not all of the time.

These are the reasons people have stereotypes, question various groups and assume people will all follow a pattern or the media has convinced their audience that this is to be expected from a group.

We usually object when this is applied to us, but use it when it applies to other people.
 Cynderella
Joined: 3/8/2007
Msg: 415
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Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 7/29/2013 9:07:07 AM
Goes both ways...never been married...waiting for a man in his 50's who's never married. Lol
We are all waiting for Mr. or Miss Right...sometimes it takes half our life's to find.
 Cynderella
Joined: 3/8/2007
Msg: 416
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Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 7/29/2013 9:13:21 AM

because no one has ever wanted them as a partner


OUCH!
 amstel2
Joined: 5/15/2012
Msg: 417
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Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 8/1/2013 3:10:03 AM
This is my 1sy post on a POF so apologies if this post is in the wrong place.

Reading some of the posts by the ladies & being a 52 yr old who has never been married or has kids. The phrase that springs to mind is "don't juge a book by it's cover". Blimey George Clooney is over 50 never married or had kids would you girls turn him down. The principles the same.

Thanks
 AthatitaApudetat
Joined: 9/26/2012
Msg: 418
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 8/1/2013 11:57:37 PM

Seriously???? I find this to be a bit unbelievable. I know several never married men this age who love women, they just have not found the right one, and they are not willing to settle, especially at their age. They do not want to end up in a divorce. What is wrong with that?


Bingo you have the right answer.
I've seen so many divorces from quick love and marriage for the wrong reasons. There is only one thing left in live I'd like to do more than anything and that is to find love and marriage. There has only been three things that kept me from getting married( lying, cheating and chemistry). But now I'm 50 and single with no chance lol. I've lived this long single might as well stay single.
 activemelaney
Joined: 9/8/2012
Msg: 419
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Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 8/2/2013 8:19:08 AM
We know 5 couples well. 2 of have been together for over 20 years...not married. In my social circle marriage and long term commitment are not synonymous. Actually, hasn't been since the earl 80's or so. Do all of you folks live in some Bible toting rural town somewhere?

Some of the posts from my gender are embarrassing. They come across as letters to the editor out of a 1930's homemaker magazine.
 JaiNai
Joined: 7/6/2013
Msg: 420
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 8/2/2013 8:38:41 AM
George Clooney has been married once.
When I meet a man over 50 who has never been married, I do wonder why. Is he afraid to take the chance? Has no one ever wanted to marry him? Is there something wrong with him?

Doesn't mean I wouldn't date him.

I also wonder the same about women over 50 who've never been married. I just can't imagine being that age and never having experienced marriage.
 activemelaney
Joined: 9/8/2012
Msg: 421
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Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 8/2/2013 9:25:05 AM
-^^^^^

If you can't imagine it then you must have a very limited imagination. Were you raised in a small village or do yo live on a remote farm? What I 'can't imagine is someone with such a myopic and narrow set of experiences in life not to be aware of alternative lifestyles.

I find it quite easy to imagine a woman over 50 and not having experienced marriage. Very easy. I've known quite a few.
 JaiNai
Joined: 7/6/2013
Msg: 422
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 8/2/2013 2:44:33 PM
One doesn't have to imagine it. It's a fact that there are men and women over 50 who have never been married. From your post it would appear that you've only known women in that category.

From my personal viewpoint, I can't imagine what it would be like to be that age and never married. I don't actually try to imagine other people's experiences. It's just not one of my imagination priorities.
 Sciencetreker
Joined: 2/13/2012
Msg: 423
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Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 8/2/2013 3:34:16 PM
I'd be less concerned about someone never married than some posters locked in their small minded worlds.
 Fleuron
Joined: 8/18/2010
Msg: 424
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 8/2/2013 4:16:30 PM

Reading some of the posts by the ladies & being a 52 yr old who has never been married or has kids. The phrase that springs to mind is "don't juge a book by it's cover". Blimey George Clooney is over 50 never married or had kids would you girls turn him down. The principles the same.


Um…..hm.

Since that was your first post I’ll go easy on you and just say, (some) women prefer not to be collectively labeled together like groupies for George Clooney, nor do we (some of us) appreciate being called “girls.”

And, NO……….it ain’t the same.

I don’t care what a man looks like, or how much money he supposedly has (I mean that IS Georgie’s criteria, correct?) I won’t allow myself to be used up and tossed away just to spend some time with him. Now he might be a very nice, funny man so we could be friends but that’s it.

OT

I really don’t care, and I wouldn’t judge a man for being over 50 and never married, as I wouldn’t want him judging me for my life choices. I’d rather get to know him for who he is; not imagine what his age and marital status implies.
 reallylucid
Joined: 5/27/2013
Msg: 425
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 8/4/2013 4:05:13 PM

I have come to this questions through my dating. Many women question a man over 50 been never married and come to a quick judgement of not even given a chance.


I just got out of a "relationship" (at least I kept thinking it was) with a man over 50 who had never been married. It took me 3 years to figure out it wasn't, so I'd have to say, I did not come to a "quick judgement".

I may be slow on that relationship thingie!
 JerseyTea
Joined: 5/19/2013
Msg: 426
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 8/18/2013 12:39:58 AM
I have come to this questions through my dating. Many women question a man over 50 been never married and come to a quick judgement of not even given a chance. Tell me ladies what is so bad about not being married over 50. Many times these men just haven't found the Miss right to live everlasting with. Why is this a turn off?

I have to disagree....I think both sexes questions this, and I'm hopeful they interpret the answers based on the individual...and not a stodgy, bitter old crank who can't change to accommodate new love, new situations, etc. in fact, I'm counting on it.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 427
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 8/18/2013 9:14:05 AM
If it bothers a woman, keep chasing the men who have been in multiple marriages and divorces. They seem like such a better catch.
 mermaid140
Joined: 8/29/2012
Msg: 428
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 8/18/2013 2:55:11 PM
Not to change the subject.
But, How about the question... You're divorced? What did you do? Really?? I just love that question...
 elmuchoburrito
Joined: 8/27/2013
Msg: 429
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 8/30/2013 8:10:42 PM
May I make it another 5 and have a roll with this one.
Will they question that I escaped divorce - by never getting married ?
doubtful - I am not on their radar. I doubt I warrant the inquisition.

how did I make it to 50 without the alimony, child support, and divorce ?
by pure gile, luck..... and I am 5-6.
"Love" a nice little diorama of duration, proximity, frequency, money and you can convince yourself that you are 'in' it
"Attraction" lets you add in ht, weight, age - and six seconds of 'look'
start pulling them away like legs of a table, and it will collapse - early and often
 alexberks
Joined: 6/23/2006
Msg: 430
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Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 9/7/2013 7:39:31 AM
I have to ask - how about the bloke who suffered a complete derailment of their sexual development earlier?

I suffered low-level sexual abuse from peers which caused me to shut down completely. It's only now that I'm fighting to reclaim those bits of me - I'm 43 now, but am currently recovering from cellulitis in my legs and getting the weight back down (I ate as analgaesic through the abuse years).

There is a possibility that I might be able to enter the fray for the first ever time in my 50s... would be one hell of a wrench if I;ve done all this work - to die a virgin.
 Proteaus
Joined: 6/9/2009
Msg: 431
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 9/7/2013 8:20:00 AM
I view the men that are past 50 and never married or had children as the most intelligent of the males . They never had to suffer the joy of being dragged by their heels through no fault divorce court , after their wife was unfaithful . If you are the man they really put it to you . Even if you end up with full custody , there is no support for single fathers who have custody . Only in rare cases will a single father get any form of support when they have custody . That is how biased the legal scene is , so you intelligent men didn't miss anything by not getting married .
 SambaDeUmaNotaSo
Joined: 11/6/2012
Msg: 432
Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 9/12/2013 3:40:52 PM
I am 52, single, and never married. I am in a wonderful relationship now, and I am only here for the forums.

I was engaged, in my 30's, for less than a week. The woman's family had already booked a "House of Worship," selected an interior decorator, and was moving things along at a blinding pace.

That all would have been fine with me, but it simply wasn't the right woman.

I proposed on the plane, on the way to meet the woman's parents. But first, I had wrapped the ring in a paper towel and put it in my pocket, planning a surprise proposal. However, I emptied my pockets before the flight, and threw the ring into the garbage, at the airport. That probably was a sign.

In my late 40's, I put a very large down-payment on a heart shaped diamond, as per the woman's preference. I planned to propose in the very near future.

I thought that I had fallen in love with a woman that had no children. I was wrong. She had informally adopted the neighbor's child. I ignored all the clues - a photo of the child on the keychain, photos of the child all over the house, the child's frequent spontaneous visits, and all the discussions about this child, and what she needed at the mall, at school, and everywhere else. I did not end up proposing. The down-payment became a very large never used credit at the jewelry store.

I would very much like to be married, but for this to happen, there has to be a solid match. This isn't about looks. It is about a match of essential personal qualities and values, and shared goals and styles.

I fall into the category of "never met the right woman," better stated as "never met the woman that is right for ME."

I think women are wonderful. I think marriage is beautiful.

There are many never-married single people like me, with lots of love to give, and we are waiting for our true love.
 silverfox97027
Joined: 9/18/2009
Msg: 433
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Women question a man over 50 and not been married?
Posted: 4/26/2014 7:28:52 PM
Don't you think that's a little unfair,i'm soon to be a 59 yr old guy who is single and unmarried.I've had a few girlfriends and a couple of them were live-in relationships unfortuntly they didn't end in marriage so why all the judging?I would love to find a sweet lady to get married too,where are they all at? I'm ready and willing for a relationship.
Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > Women question a man over 50 and not been married?