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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Awkward dilemma?      Home login  
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 revcomsla
Joined: 5/13/2008
Msg: 7
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Awkward dilemma?Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)
I don't get the whole thing about feeling out another option while you're in a relationship. But, it's pretty common from what I've seen. The way I see this, they are two separate decisions:

1. Do you stay in your current relationship?
2. Do you investigate another relationship?

It sounds like you're not satisfied with your current relationship...you yourself said that you don't feel like it's going anywhere. You say you want a break and some time to yourself. Being comfortable is not the best reason to stay in something. I think deep down though, you're afraid to be single because you're don't appear willing to do this if there's a possibility things might not work out with your "friend."

The decisions to get involved with your friend is one that should occur after the break and should stand on it's own accord. If it doesn't work out, then that's the way it rolls. There's a risk that you might end up with neither and if you're not OK with that...then you shouldn't put yourself in this position.

Do what your heart is telling you - but try to be fair to everyone. You, your current and your potential future.
 chameleonf
Joined: 12/22/2008
Msg: 8
Awkward dilemma?
Posted: 3/9/2009 9:39:12 AM
If you have such a "strong sense of loyalty", why are you even asking a bunch of people at POF if you should tell your "friend" that you are in a relationship? If you're any kind of loyal to the person you're already in a relationship, it would kind of be a no brainer that anyone else, friend or otherwise, would know about it. The fact that you're asking whether or not you should tell this new friend doesn't sound like there's much loyalty going on - spoken or otherwise. Get out of one relationship before you even consider another - then it's "fair" to everyone concerned.
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