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Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??      Home login  
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 dannyr0697
Joined: 9/23/2006
Msg: 77
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He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??Page 4 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)

Wow, you're harsh! The guy bared his soul to you, and told you flat out how nervous he was, and all you can think about is how disappointed YOU were? And here you are discussing it in an open forum ~ WOW ~ now that's insensative.



Excuse the pun, but this is a hard subject for most men to discuss.
I totally agree with anonymouslyme here. I might even add the you are an inconsiderate biotch.
I have diabeties and, regretfully, when my sugar levels are out if wack, I experiounce this problem. Not always, but sometimes. I've learned to do things to a woman that can, literally, curl your toenails. I have this occasional problem to THANK for this extra knowledge. I might never have learned some of these things without it, such is my desire to please her AND feel like superman in the process.
I say, if he's attentive to your body and your feelings, HELL YEAH, give him another try.

L8TR
 PhxNiceGuy
Joined: 3/13/2009
Msg: 78
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He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/20/2009 6:12:38 PM
You just have to give a man a goal or even make a game of it....

For instance, if you have a stopwatch handy ask him when he's ready to try then yell "Go!".... you can see how long it takes him and try to beat his record each time. You can even cheer him on while the clock is ticking with shouts of support like "Hurry!" or "Time's running out!"
 Leeanne
Joined: 10/14/2005
Msg: 80
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He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/20/2009 7:23:52 PM
If something's broken I toss it out or I return it to the store and get my money back!!



















Geeze I'm kidding - you people are way too serious!!! Lighten up! Oh wait he couldn't get it up - toss him!!
 supermanb182
Joined: 3/5/2009
Msg: 81
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/20/2009 7:37:16 PM
Well of course, you planned on having sex together for the first time. You planned it! He was thinking about that all day and was under more pressure than you can imagine. Next time, dont plan it. Take him to your house and take advantage of him :) That will get him going for sure. He's not going to expect it all day.
 1134ftw
Joined: 1/12/2009
Msg: 82
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/20/2009 7:48:44 PM
First- it's happened to every dude at least once- no matter the age- my bane is lots of alcohol, if I am drunk ( now especially at 31) my pen0r isn't going to perform, viagra or not. This dude sounds like he had some nerves, he coulda been less experienced than you (though he woulda never let that on) and freaked out. I'd give him another chance if you like him, he may be a dude you gotta tale your time with or something- I always imagine the coffee shop dudes needing to light candles and have an atmosphere to perform, but that is my narrow minded world view. to be honest, ( and the liberal women are gonna hate this, plz no hate emails) I always thought the kind, sensitive type of dudes were on the verge of gayness- check craigslist m4m and see how many married dudes are SEEKING for proof.
 blondegirl24
Joined: 8/14/2008
Msg: 83
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/20/2009 8:22:38 PM
Of course give him another chance. Poor guy did everything he could to please you. He has told you it's not you. I don't know how old he is but dating men in their 50's it has happened to me. Reassure them, try and make light of it not to embarrass him. Why not go to the doctor with him and let the doctor figure out what is wrong.

You know how difficult it is to find a decent guy and he sounds decent so don't be so quick to get rid of him. I think too many people dump someone at the first sight of an imperfection and then whine when then can't meet someone. Who knows down the road for whatever reason you couldn't orgasm...medications, stress and mentalpause. Wouldn't you want him to understand and stay?

He feels bad enough; try to make light of it and you will get much more appreciation from him.


 Confident247
Joined: 1/1/2009
Msg: 84
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/20/2009 8:28:33 PM
OP,
Being that he went out of his way to please you sexually (orally) i say you should definetly give him another chance.
 190574
Joined: 1/30/2009
Msg: 85
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/20/2009 8:54:08 PM
I have been there. the nerves can in fact screw it up.. but, what I find that works is, ok, it won't wake up right away.. she let me fool around for a bit. As in, I rubbed my penis around her clit and vaginal opening, got a bit of the feel of her wetness and that is where the nerves start to go away because that one touch did the trick. She was patient with me.. And when i was finally in, she was just simply happy that I managed to do it and she got to feel me inside. But, now, years later, I don't get s**t from her.
 PhxNiceGuy
Joined: 3/13/2009
Msg: 86
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He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/20/2009 9:27:44 PM

But, now, years later, I don't get s**t from her.


Funny!
 glebo123
Joined: 5/15/2008
Msg: 87
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/20/2009 11:47:47 PM
This isn't something I like to admit but it can give you a great prespective. I happen to have this problem and it's a recurring issue with me. I would say definately give him a chance and if it doesn't work assure him that it's no big deal. Just keep trying and if it works, it works, if it doesn't, than it doesn't simple as that. All he needs is to be more comfortable with you, and making a big deal about it will not happen at all. It is also a huge pride/ego buster to a man. I would recommend not speaking about it to him, if he's comfortable talking about it he'll come to you. But I can't stress enough that you need to ensure him that it's no big deal it will help matters a great deal. If you like this guy as much as you say you do than sex should just be a bonus anyways. If the problem persists, than I'd recommend going to the nearest stag shop/love shop and picking up a pill called 'Rise'. It works great, and doesn't take long to kick in.
 FourUms
Joined: 3/17/2009
Msg: 88
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He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/20/2009 11:54:28 PM
I can't believe you're thinking about NOT giving him another chance. It seems like you're kind of selfish. You say you're "very disappointed" even though he pleased you in other ways. He gave you a reason and said it never happened before. Try to take that as a compliment - you're something special. Finally, yes, nerves could account for it - arousal happens in the brain.
 wolftxus
Joined: 2/24/2009
Msg: 89
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/21/2009 12:12:54 AM

if you have a stopwatch handy ask him when he's ready to try then yell "Go!"....

OP, perhaps PhxNiceGuy is onto something. On your next date, tell your guy upfront it is his last chance. When the mood is right, tell him he has 20 seconds to get it up, or else he is history. Just to add to the pressure, make some predictions about that you don't expect it to be very big anyway. About three seconds after he drops his undies go 'tic toc ... tic toc ... tic toc' and stare impatiently at his organ. Get real close as if to verify that something is happening, then back off and shake your head in disbelief. As you gently push him towards the door, complain about how his impotence makes you feel as a woman...

On second thought - could it be that your attitude has something to do with it?

I liked another poster's comment, too, that the little man is trying to tell the big man something. Sometimes he knows better and plain refuses. Don't worry about your looks though, such cases are usually more about your behavior.
 Smuggler
Joined: 11/21/2006
Msg: 90
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He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/21/2009 3:46:23 AM
YES YES YES and yes again.
Sex is 90% in the brain speak to any theapist, or read any book, on the subject.
If this guy is great, and you have a connection, and you like him, for Gods sake do something.
Get him some Viagra to kickstart him.
You owe it to yourself, and to him
 ohio07
Joined: 12/27/2008
Msg: 91
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/21/2009 1:01:37 PM
She couldn't cum/"squirt", should I give her another chance? Of course! See how silly this question really is?
 BlueEyes2love
Joined: 12/14/2008
Msg: 92
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He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/21/2009 5:00:05 PM
Everyone deserves another chance.
 1984,loveis
Joined: 2/27/2009
Msg: 93
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/21/2009 9:18:16 PM
IF you really CARE for him HELL yeah
 MandaKay
Joined: 3/14/2009
Msg: 94
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/22/2009 11:30:16 AM
I'm not a 2nd chance person. But for this...yes. Give the guy a 2nd chance. Now, if the next time it happens, he still has trouble. Talk and see what might be going on. communication works wonders.
 idoc_steve
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 97
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/23/2009 2:20:09 PM
Guys get uptight..sometimes it's more of a problem in the beginning of a relationship with a new woman in your life. I've been there...and the women have been totally understanding and patient and treated it like a nonissue. Within a week or two everything was right back up to speed. I noticed that I had this problem to some extent in all 3 intimate relationships during my first foray out to the field in over 16 years of marriage, but it was less of a problem each time.

Any woman who will shoot a guy down because he can't perform on the first, or second, or third time..or whatever..is in my opinion very shallowminded and does not have a good capacity to understand her partner nor an inclination to care all that much.

At the very least, talk about it and find out what the issue is. If the guy has a permanent problem then that's another matter entirely but it's something he oughta let you know about.
 Lookinatcha1
Joined: 12/27/2008
Msg: 98
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/23/2009 2:32:12 PM
It all depends on how you really feel about him. Have been in a relationship for nearly a year and he is having more and more problems. As a woman, I want great sex, which includes a penis that is hard. It becomes difficult to determine what you feel for the guy and what you want sexually. At some point, you have to make a choice, do you want awesome sex or do you want a relationship with a man who may not be able to get an erection, even with "the pill"....
Good Luck Girl,
I will be going back home alone and looking for the relationship I need...
 clearbluecolors
Joined: 1/8/2009
Msg: 99
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/24/2009 1:36:00 AM
You are a very wise man
 cowgirl_loves_heels
Joined: 8/1/2008
Msg: 100
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/24/2009 6:50:21 AM
just cause its not hard dont mean he dont like you its cause the mans got lots on his mind and cant **** at the time lol ...
 Joeld49
Joined: 8/12/2005
Msg: 101
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He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/24/2009 6:52:40 AM
No, I think you should dump him for his sake. Given the sensitivity that you show by even asking this question, he would be better off without you.
 MizBexReturns
Joined: 3/17/2009
Msg: 102
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/24/2009 6:53:07 AM
It is rare that I ever post in this particular forum, mostly because I cannot believe how much private detail people make public. I cannot imagine sharing this detail in a public forum. Having said that, I can't help but wonder if YOU did your part. Given the nature and detail of your post, I'm leaning towards no you didn't.
 RAULV-BB
Joined: 7/19/2008
Msg: 103
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/24/2009 7:21:35 AM
dont go "ahead" give him "head" and plz make sure you are waxed.
 RAULV-BB
Joined: 7/19/2008
Msg: 104
He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??
Posted: 3/26/2009 6:36:49 AM
you are making a really big deal out of it, seems to me you are here to get laid more than anything else, "FIND THE MAN NO THE GAME"
and for those girls emails that i got after my first post, ..........we men always will be kids, so make sure to wrap the toy with a bow and sexy papper. if you dont get it, good luck with the Energ. Bunny !
Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > He couldn't get it UP, should I give him another chance??