| | How open are you REALLY to discuss why you're still single?Page 13 of 15 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15) | | The parasites get excited when you're dead, eyes bulging, entering your head, and all your thoughts - yeah, they rot . | |
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| How open are you REALLY to discuss why you're still single?
Posted: 12/8/2015 5:36:33 AM | why I am still single
hmmm...was married for 20 years
I dated a bit here and there the first year after being divorced
got a good look at what was out there so to speak
changed my mind real quick..
now I am working and going to graduate school and taking care of my son
am I against finding someone? no just refined my search criteria | |
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| How open are you REALLY to discuss why you're still single?
Posted: 12/8/2015 9:50:17 AM | I think there's nothing wrong with having clear standards for what we want in a relationship.
I think there's nothing wrong with noticing...there aren't many candidates out there who fit those standards. makes logical sense that those who do, likely found someone a long time ago. Doesn't have to mean all singles suck, just that we want a round peg but we find a lot of square holes out there.
so, hopefully we can find a substitute for what we need a relationship for, if we decide its going to be a while before we find that round peg. but what about sex? we likely have clear standards for that, but they might be a lot easier to find. Either b/c we have fewer standards for that need than we do for a relationship, or b/c there'e more "round pegs" out there to fill our needs for sex. | |
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| How open are you REALLY to discuss why you're still single?
Posted: 12/8/2015 9:57:12 AM | | There are people I know who are married for a long period of time, where I wonder why they are NOT single. I would think most us know people that make you wonder, either "How do they manage to stay married" or "I would never have guessed in a million years that their marriage would end. They seemed to be a perfect match." | |
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| How open are you REALLY to discuss why you're still single?
Posted: 12/8/2015 12:56:30 PM |
CynthiaSM
I recognize that as a fat, tall, 54-yr old woman I have little 'market value' left. I look around at other single women in their 60s+ and try to comprehend and accommodate to what life will be like.
For now I accept being single because it is as it is. But it is not what I want for my future.
I didn’t respond to this part of your post earlier, it sounded like nothing much but self pity. Most of us have bad days, feel sorry for ourselves, then get over it and go on with our lives. But now that several others have responded, I thought I might add my 2 cents.
I am a full 10 years older than you. And I am still alive, and healthy, and dating, and participating fully in life and everything it has to offer. I have dated women your age (and younger), my age (and older). Saturday night, at the Meetup Christmas Party for singles 50 and over, I must have danced with at least a dozen different women. Some as young as 50 (some looked younger than that, but I didn’t check their IDs). And some definitely over 70. Probably the hottest woman in the bunch was very close to my age, about 10 years older than you. Every man in the room watched when she walked by, when she was showing off out on the dance floor. She looked very much like you, with the exception of longer hair and better dressed than you show in your pictures.
My best friend in the group has the hots for a new woman in the group, who is about 5’10”. He is around my height, and really likes dancing with her – “Hey, I don’t have to bend over!” For a tall man, your height can be an advantage. He is 61, this 5’10” lady is 63, and he is definitely going after her.
Life is not over at 54, nor is it over at 64. And whomever told you that you’re fat – shoot that lying SOB! (I remember when you had pictures up showing you at the firing range!)
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| How open are you REALLY to discuss why you're still single?
Posted: 12/8/2015 1:17:28 PM | I will add to my reasons for being single is my tolerance level has dropped.
Last night had a man who for a while has been a pen pal and occasional phone call want another conversation.
He keeps inviting me to visit him. He lives 3 hours away.
Having nothing else to do I said yes to a conversation.
I enjoyed some of the conversation and suggested that we meet face to face somewhere half way.
He refused and had lots of excuses.
But when he stared to joke about violence and men hitting women and that women should just accept men for who they are, and kept trying to make a joke about me saying that I consider violence of any type abhorrent including men hitting women ... I hung up.
He has since sent me messages saying that he does not condone hitting women.
And that he is a nice man. One of the good ones. | |
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| How open are you REALLY to discuss why you're still single?
Posted: 12/9/2015 12:05:34 PM | ^^^^ Actually, I did go to a similar place called " Go Bananas " when I dated a woman with young kids years ago, as well as watched shows like Zora the Explorer , etc.
I even introduced them to classic Bugs Bunny cartoons on Youtube . | |
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| How open are you REALLY to discuss why you're still single?
Posted: 12/9/2015 12:28:14 PM | You are at least upfront about dating someone with young children
When I was a single mom with two children under the age of 6, men would ask me out then complain that my kids were at home. "Surprise!! THEY LIVE HERE.. . you do not."
One time my son was excited about a new transformer he got. He ran up to the man I was dating to show him
The guy flat out told my 5 yr old son .. "No, I don't want to see your new toy. You have things you like, I have things I like" So does mommy. And that man no longer was one of the things I liked
There is absolutely nothing wrong with not wanting to get involved with a person with children. It is a package deal not everyone wants to work with. The problems come into play when someone pursues that relationship as if those little people are going to either disappear or be pushed into the background.
Many are still single because they have responsibilities that take priority over romance. | |
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| How open are you REALLY to discuss why you're still single?
Posted: 12/9/2015 12:43:42 PM | ^^^ " One time my son was excited about a new transformer he got. He ran up to the man I was dating to show him
The guy flat out told my 5 yr old son .. "No, I don't want to see your new toy. You have things you like, I have things I like"
Wow, what a dik !
I even pretended to be surprised when the boy showed me his magic tricks , played hide n seek, etc
But, after that relationship ended I realized the young kid thing just didn't work for me. | |
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| How open are you REALLY to discuss why you're still single?
Posted: 12/9/2015 1:59:12 PM |
"One time my son was excited about a new transformer he got. He ran up to the man I was dating to show him
The guy flat out told my 5 yr old son .. "No, I don't want to see your new toy. You have things you like, I have things I like"
I'm sorry, but that is so alarming that it actually made me laugh, repeatedly. I half think the guy was maybe being intentionally funny? | |
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| How open are you REALLY to discuss why you're still single?
Posted: 12/9/2015 2:19:02 PM | I doubt I would get to the point of meeting a man's 5 year old child.
If it happened it would be a surprise and I would be in shock.
That being said it is not the child's fault.
I love kids and in that instance would probably sit down and play transformers and cancel the date.
The 5 year old would be much better company. | |
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| How open are you REALLY to discuss why you're still single?
Posted: 12/9/2015 3:48:29 PM | Yes, it is almost laughable that a man would actually say that to someone's child and expect to be allowed to still come around as a date. He wasn't joking.
Most people would play with the child at least for a few minutes. I would - I love kids!
I think the adult children or teenagers are way harder to deal with than the little ones.
When I was in my late teens, one of my friends made her dad so miserable about getting remarried after her mom passed away that he and his new wife separated but continued to see each other behind my friend's back.
Strange reason for being single but it happens. It's one thing to be single for your small children who need you. But I know many single adults whose GROWN children make it difficult for them. | |
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| How open are you REALLY to discuss why you're still single?
Posted: 12/12/2015 1:55:36 AM | In my life it is indeed a fact that adult children make it harder to date. I have personal horror stories from shenanigans caused by dependent children to interrupt serious dating. However the skill and finesse of the adult mind to contrive specific scenario's will remain unparalleled.
We have to plan for our retirement, but our adult children are also planning for whatever inheritance may be left. An uneven match will likely be squashed by the most savvy claiming to protect our best interest.
It is not casual dating that I find difficult, but serious connections made that might threaten future assets. | |
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| How open are you REALLY to discuss why you're still single?
Posted: 12/12/2015 7:22:44 AM | ^^^
Damn, just damn.
Can't wait til that conversation comes up....
My sons: Hey dad, will you be leaving us anything?
Me: None of your business. I don't need the brake lines getting cut on my car...
Future partner: I know this is a sensitive subject sweety, but will you be sharing your policy with your sons? You know those young men are just going to give it to their moms, right? You know, straight to your exes?
Of course, I'll need to clear the rent/mortgage debacle before I head into the value at death discussion. | |
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| How open are you REALLY to discuss why you're still single?
Posted: 12/13/2015 3:49:40 AM | When my late fiancé was still with us, his son and daughter in law were very malicious to me. He tried to remain blind to this fact so he could spent the precious time he had left with his grandchildren.
Death, and life threatening illnesses do some very dangerous things when greed rears its ugly head. We all live and learn, and now I see the signs. Not everyone has strong moral character. | |
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| How open are you REALLY to discuss why you're still single?
Posted: 12/13/2015 10:00:09 PM |
I'm really odd I don't ever want anything
IDK if that's so odd...
Personally, I like to distance myself from anything that might remind me of them.
Then, I do pro-bono work taste testing as many bottles of Captain Morgan as it takes for me to forget why I'm even drinking....er...I mean, taste testing. | |
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