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 Aimyloo
Joined: 3/21/2006
Msg: 100
What are women really looking for?Page 7 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
I'd have to say I am looking for someone who is an equal in most respects. I have posted what I prefer, but that's not saying I wont bend a little. I just want someone genuine, who can carry on a multi-faceted conversation that involves the many aspects of life, appreciates me for the person that I am.. etc., etc. I'm by NO means perfect, I'm just me - and I like me :)

I seem to find on here- though, that a lot of the men I have spoken to say they want one thing or don't mind other things - but really don't mean it. They mostly seem to want trophies, or someone who wants to watch sports, hike, camp, fish, etc. That stuff is all great, but hey, I have my interests too... (I'm not much into sports, hiking hurts, my idea of camping is a Motel 6, fishing is ok as long as I dont have to gut it.. hehe.) But I'll try most anything. I'm just not super physically active (physical problems prevent this...) and thats what I run into alot on here... gym fanatics, or HWP- which I must say, I know very FEW women who are.

I am totally put off by men who immediately start questioning my 'build', or venture into sexual conversation right away. Now - I'm not a prude by any means, but to me, that type of conversation is saved for once you get to know someone a little better, but inevitably it always comes up. Always. I saw someone in here say something about "Just because I don't want to have sex with you, does'nt mean I don't want to have sex" Thats very true. I'm just uncomfortable thinking that someone wants to talk about the bedroom before even knowing ME. When those bits start failing you in the years to come, what will you have to fall back on? A relationship is NOT based on it, at least not in my world. Sure, it's a part of it -- but let nature take it's course!

Hmm.. wow.. ok I got a little off course for my first post.. sorry y'all! Just in case someone wants to flame me for grammar/spelling - please check yours before you do.. hehe. I've seen that alot in here since I've been forum lurking hehe
 MoparGuy69
Joined: 8/21/2005
Msg: 101
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What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/2/2009 5:12:00 PM
I still believe most women go for appearance, attitude, assertiveness, and a good line of smooth talking. As a lot of men base who they date off physical attractiveness. Like i said before, people need to be more realistic about who they are, and what they expect in someone else.
I have heard from some, but not all women think looks are very important. All i can say is, It is just as hard for men as it is for women.
Just think if someone was an amputee, disfigured, or had a serious handicap they might as well forget it.
 ifxp76
Joined: 4/3/2009
Msg: 102
What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/2/2009 5:21:07 PM
there is no concrete answer to what women are looking for....the same way you cant tell me why im single and cant find "the one"....its either there or it isnt...i wouldnt take it personally...i do believe everyone should at least respond back whether its a yes or a no thank you....if they cant even do that then that should tell you they really arent worth talking to anyway. everyone has different likes as in physical appearance, height, weight, etc....but outside of that some people may not think that u guys would have much in common, maybe they have kids and u dont or vice versa....alot of times its also in what your profile sounds like...is it positive, is it the same ole same ole crap...did u just write 15 words or did you write a whole book...believe it or not you can tell alot about a person just by reading how they type, how they say things and what their talking about in their profile...be unique, be yourself, and never smother someone...if they respond great, if they dont, no love lost...good luck
 MoparGuy69
Joined: 8/21/2005
Msg: 103
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What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/2/2009 7:17:41 PM
That is very true. I know i shouldn't take it personally, but it does get old meeting people and it is the same garbage. We have nothing in common or your a lot of fun to hang out with, but your not my type. I do agree people should at least respond back and let that person know what is going on. All i can say is i am no expert by any means on all this stuff. Thanks for the words of confidence!
 Vincent_1984
Joined: 11/14/2005
Msg: 104
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What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/3/2009 7:53:48 AM
I would love to know; I have all the qualities that women so often say they want and I also think that I have a lot to offer but then the sheer amount of rejection I have been subjected to on this site tells me otherwise. I know each woman is unique and looks for different things but then my results also seem so... unanimous. I am not really sure what more can be expected of me but, if someone has the answer, please let me know.

 bucsgirl
Joined: 5/13/2006
Msg: 105
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What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/3/2009 8:05:41 AM
Here's my old standard:

Women want the man who models part-time for Calvin Klein jockeys just for extra spending money while working on his doctorate in Nuclear Physics. He hasn't had time to make space for his Nobel Prize or his Pulitzer on his bookshelf, hasn't taken his degrees to be framed yet, as he's busy volunteering at the nursing home and hosting a charity telethon. He's also a diagnosed nympho (whatever the male version if there IS one), former gymnast and made the Olympic team but had to go to Europe because he's first chair violinst with the Euopean Master Orchestra. He's the only child of elderly wealthy parents who own a chain of designer shoe stores, day spas, ladies’ clothing stores, gourmet restaurants, European Chocolate specialty shops, maid services, lawn care and car detailing businesses.

Now after answering this silly question (you have to say REALLY?? Really?) so many times, I've narrowed it down to this:

A very sickly, very wealthy man with no living relatives that is able to sign a legal document. "Here, stud muffin, just sign your name and I'm all yours!"

Dang I think I may have to write another profile....
 SamTheMan08
Joined: 6/23/2008
Msg: 106
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What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/3/2009 9:20:35 AM
I think that when it comes to dating that men get a harder time then ladies do. I am a bloke and I have chatted to a few people from this site and I arranged to meet up with 3 people from this site. The first one we met once for a drink in a pub and then she never returned my calls the second one stood me up and so I never got to meet her and the third one made me drive over an hour to meet her for dinner and after 5 mins of meeting her she told me it was not going to work out and that we should not go on this date after all. My last girlfriend went out with me for a month and then just did not return my calls one day and I have not seen or heard anything from her ever since . Another girl I met said we can just be friends but you can hug me if you like. So I have no idea what a girl is looking for I am 33 years old I have a job a flat in the UK and an apartment in Spain and a 2 passports a uk and a new Zealand passort and my own car and I can cook and am not a big party aminal and love to be romantic and not really into action films much . I do look young for my age and have long-ish hair but I always put the girl first in a relationship and always care about the girl I am going out with at the time and they all say I am really nice so I to am still confused as to what ladies want as it never seems to work out for me. Do girls not want to have nice guys as there boyfriends. Do they really want to go out with the Phill Mithcell's of the world. I just think ilfe is not fair all I want to do is fine the right girl to settle down with know wants any of that.
 Mr_Izz
Joined: 6/10/2009
Msg: 107
What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/3/2009 9:45:31 AM
What a great response!
 giroditalia
Joined: 3/3/2009
Msg: 108
What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/3/2009 11:22:25 AM
SamtheMan08

Know the feeling well. Just don't get despondent or give up. You have plenty of years ahead of you. Try Googling some of David DeAngelo's dating guides for men. You may be coming off as too much of a "nice guy", which is a real turnoff for women, though they would never admit this in mixed company, only amongst themselves. If you're already able to find women to date you may just need to sharpen your game. David's theory is sound: you don't find a long termer by looking for her in the beginning. You start dating for the short term with the goal of having sex as quickly as possible with the largest number of women. You get there by triggering their "attraction" mode. There is a technique for this. It's from those women who want to sleep with you and can't help feeling that way about you because you did and said the right things, that you will choose who may be long term material. Women always SAY they want to play the long term game, but want TIME to get to know you first. That road goes either to Friendsville or to Providersville very quickly. You don't want to be a provider or a friend, because women control these types of men, and will always withhold sex if they think you fit in either category. Bottom line is there's always some guy they want against all logic, between their legs. You need to be that guy. Get David's stuff. It works. And stop listening to the women posters here on the forums. They are either sarcastic or just plain flat out liars, and are sadistically enjoying your frustration. They have no interest in you succeeding in finding a mate. None at all. A woman cannot tell a man how to get a woman. She'd have to be a man to do that.
 Vincent_1984
Joined: 11/14/2005
Msg: 109
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What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/3/2009 4:31:56 PM
Thank you for the feedback, the compliments and the good wishes.

However, I do have to ask: what do you mean by rigid? do you mean the line about physical attraction? I thought I was being pretty open: Distance, height, ethnicity, interests and views are all non-issue for me; is looking for physical attraction really being that rigid?

I know my views on the human mind aren't very common; I knew there was a risk of appearing shallow but I didn't think it was that bad. I mean, really, is it really that unusual to look for chemistry? It's not like I don't put any efforts into my own looks either: I work out, eat well, groom, clean and try to dress well.

I also want to add that, just because I am open to everyone, it doesn't mean that I don't care about who they are. It almost seems as if others expect me to treat those who disagree with me with disdain and failing to comply to this mentality signifies that I can't actually care about the things we do agree on.
 DocElffington
Joined: 1/20/2009
Msg: 110
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What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/16/2009 1:41:52 PM
Men that think like women

So...........they're looking for gay men!
 mortalez
Joined: 4/9/2005
Msg: 112
What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/19/2009 9:02:08 AM
They want money, love is not the goal these days.
 *topchef*
Joined: 8/2/2008
Msg: 113
What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/19/2009 9:42:18 AM
^^^ mortalez, believe it or not, there are some ladies looking for more than someone to finance their existence.

If people are having ssues with the opposite sex, and it repeats over and over again, thten perhaps it is the type of person you are attracting or attracted to. Time to change things up and do something about attracting what you are looking for. Maybe try fishing on the other side of the pond.
 mortalez
Joined: 4/9/2005
Msg: 114
What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/19/2009 9:53:58 AM

^^^ mortalez, believe it or not, there are some ladies looking for more than someone to finance their existence.

If people are having ssues with the opposite sex, and it repeats over and over again, thten perhaps it is the type of person you are attracting or attracted to. Time to change things up and do something about attracting what you are looking for. Maybe try fishing on the other side of the pond.


OK I have a crappy job a 21 year old car, and a 2 bedroom small house.
I also have lots of love in my heart to give, I give affection, I'm a good talkier and I'm faithfull(you know the important things).

I had a woman that got along with me great in everyway but she dumped me because I did not make more than her. not the first time that has happened. so if every woman I have dated has been that into me but let money be the desiding factor then what am I to believe?

I would rather be living in a cardboard box with the right woman than in a mansion alone or with a gold digger.
 *topchef*
Joined: 8/2/2008
Msg: 115
What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/19/2009 10:17:08 AM

I had a woman that got along with me great in everyway but she dumped me because I did not make more than her. not the first time that has happened. so if every woman I have dated has been that into me but let money be the desiding factor then what am I to believe?


I would say the women you are meeting and attracting are not self-actualized, authentic or worthy of a good man with sincere intentions. They are shallow and are looking to take their success and "trade up" in lifestyle, as they are not satisfied with their own success.

I have found just the opposite of your experience, many men allow their ego to push them away from a good woman who has had more financial success than they have, someone who is well entrenched with a great career. I realize that men who think this way would never stand the test of time with me anyway, so I move on, knowing there is someone who will be able to appreciate and be open to share what I bring to the relationship instead of comparing the haves and the have nots between us.



doing the laundry and lot of other sundry items of slavery its worse for a man
because its womans work

And then there are some guys who still think it is 1947 and women should be grateful any man who would allow them to be in their presence and have the priviledge of scrubbing skid marks out of their tightie whities.....these neaderthals should expect to lead a long, miserable life.....alone!!!
 ssnnow
Joined: 12/28/2008
Msg: 116
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What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/25/2009 8:49:15 PM
Ok , I'm reading all these responses to your comments about the site and women. I joined this site quite a long time ago just because a friend said I should. I have been on here maybe 3 times and each time I see men with stupid profiles, unattractive pictures and then they think that women have a problem. In order to know what a woman wants you have to take the time to ask and to actually like women for other reasons than sex. Don't get me wrong, I understand how men think and I'm fine with that. Men are not complicated but very simple in their wants and needs. We women can appear to have unattractive attributes but I can tell you that when it comes to older women....over 40, if she's got it together we DO know what we want and what we don't want and being a single mom does not make you a woman searching for a man with money! I'm perfectly capable of looking after myself, I would just love to have a man that ,yes ,makes me laugh, is kind, and takes the time to find out what makes me tick.
Good luck in your search and please what ever your looking for put it out there and it will happen.
 mortalez
Joined: 4/9/2005
Msg: 117
What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/27/2009 12:15:50 AM

1. Honesty
2. Honesty
3. Honesty!!!!

In other words, don't contact me if I'm not what you're truly looking for, but you contact me anyway because I seem "close enough". Yes, I do need to know everything about you, including absolutely everything about your past, if we start dating regularly. (Example: I don't care if you caught crabs from that stripper in Vegas two years ago. I just want to know you got treated for it!) It's not what you did that will upset me. It's lying about it, or "leaving something out" that bothers me.

4. loyalty

This is actually important to men, but it's also important to us too.

5. self awareness

I don't care if you have some dysfunctions. But if you're still in denial of them, its not going to work between us.

6. sense of humor and someone who can handle sarcasm

Some folks can dish it out but can't take it once we try to dish it back.

7. even temper

I know guys get mad sometimes, and sometimes that means they break, throw, or hit things. I get that. But if you ever do that to me...we're done.

8. Honesty....sorry, did I mention that already?


If that was the case really nice guys who live in ratty apartments or at their moms house could be honest and still find dates.

hhhhmmmmmm I smell bovine fecal matter.
 mortalez
Joined: 4/9/2005
Msg: 118
What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/28/2009 9:01:27 AM
I wish that was what all women sought.
 Monkey_brains
Joined: 6/25/2009
Msg: 119
What are women really looking for?
Posted: 7/28/2009 8:28:59 PM
Usually...my keys....
 Pirate Mollie
Joined: 7/21/2009
Msg: 120
hey you forgot....
Posted: 12/20/2009 7:45:41 AM
i really want someone to pay for all of my stuff is that bad? they can drive me around when it snows. it just snowed here yesterday and people are so stupid, they have nop idea how to drive. they like 3 miles an hour and wonder why people rear end them and oh my god it is not even a dent but they want to call the po-po anyway. my sister was so pissed she tried them with money but it was like this old couple who wanted to do the right thing and they weren't having none of that. she is afraid her insurance will go up and then she starts to yell at them. she looked like a lunatic screaming at them in them in the street but actually she looked pretty normal for her. i would have tried to help the old people because i really hate her guts but i couldn't stop laughing.
 AJRosy
Joined: 8/21/2008
Msg: 121
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What are women really looking for?
Posted: 12/20/2009 12:18:56 PM
secretagentman99.
There are exceptions to the rules out here, sounds like some woman did a major job on you, for those of us who are really real I hope you find that one that can change your mind and make you happy, not all women are the same we all come from different molds, I guess I am really from the 'old school' in that when a guy asks you out on a date he pays, I have no qualms with paying my share or as we used to call it 'dutch treat' when it's necessary (we all get caught between paydays) , I take care of myself fine enough financially to suit me, I buy my clothes from Bealls and shop for most everything else at Walmart and I'm happy with that, most of the guys I've met on here (after a few e-mails) want to go straight to internet sex talk, is the the 'loving relationship with a good woman' they are referring to? does that show any kind of respect?, of course physical attraction plays a role that's a reality, but from there you have to get to know the person on a face to face meeting, you can easily be attracted to someone that you can't stand as a person, or you could be 'somewhat' attracted to and find they are exactly what you desire , but if there is no attraction at all there's not much sense in persuing the issue right? that is not shallow, that is realistic, and no he doesn't have to be 'hot' looking, I'm not saying I'm anything 'special' but as long as I'm 'special' to him thats what matters, but so far I haven't found him...just alot of talk..talk..talk.....by the way, as for abusive men, if they read my profile they will know that if they hurt me I am trained to hurt back (I was a prison guard for 17 yrs.)
 AJRosy
Joined: 8/21/2008
Msg: 122
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Own or Rent
Posted: 12/20/2009 12:38:09 PM
Hey guy! If you have to buy a house to get her are you sure 'she's' the one you want to put in it?...I say keep fishing baby...
 rockster3000
Joined: 12/14/2009
Msg: 123
Own or Rent
Posted: 12/20/2009 5:33:58 PM
An equally valid question, what are men looking for?
 gurlnextdoor123
Joined: 8/28/2009
Msg: 124
What are women really looking for?
Posted: 12/20/2009 6:04:16 PM
I think most women, like most men, are looking for the right match. And, if we all made perfect matches for one another, how boring would all of this be? A lot of factors go into who is the right match for us. You seem to be fun, honest and respectful and (you are attractive). Keep up with that, and I think it will happen eventually. Don't let it get you down or beat on your confidence. Confidence is one of the most appealing qualities in a man.

I agreed with lady...grammar and punctuation are HUGE to me because it shows me they've taken the time to present their profile in the best possible light. I don't want someone who puts in a half ass effort. Also, I tend to have some hesitancy when I look at a profile and the guy has his shirt off. I like to unwrap the package myself, so to speak..and that takes the mystery away for me. Also, it gives me the impression that they are looking for hook-ups and not necessarily a relationship. Keep in mind, it's just my opinion.
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