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Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > How to measure your D ick the correct way..      Home login  
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 2Irish1
Joined: 9/1/2008
Msg: 76
How to measure your D ick the correct way.. And why EjD is better than EDPage 4 of 15    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15)
Looking left I say that****is 72" with a 34" girth....
 star*tossed
Joined: 5/17/2009
Msg: 77
How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 5/29/2009 6:22:18 PM
Anything less than 9 inches is AVERAGE?
Dayhum!
I've been measuring all these years with my tongue...I suppose that's wrong too?
 2Irish1
Joined: 9/1/2008
Msg: 78
How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 5/29/2009 6:34:31 PM
^^^^that's funny....that's how I measure the puff....it's always good..
 whytwater
Joined: 8/7/2008
Msg: 79
How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 5/30/2009 8:38:00 AM

The funny thing is that we guys, that are well hung, don't brag about it!!!!!!!!!!!!!! For the rest . . . .


Damn, aren't you one subtle somnabytch?!!! Maybe some nightcrawler can help you with that.


Dayhum!
I've been measuring all these years with my tongue...I suppose that's wrong too?


Watch out!!! It's a trap!! She eats her mates, AFTER the beheading!!

Dayhum!
 good_catch77
Joined: 3/28/2007
Msg: 80
How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 5/30/2009 9:32:43 AM
This post has be enlightening lol. Pretty funny I never thought about the toilet paper roll to measure girth. I might have to try that with a lot of lube to ensure I can get it back out. HEHE. (J/k). Have to put that disclaimer or I will be bashed for bragging.

I found a ruler at my old house that had "sayings" for every inch. It was called the Peter Meter, it was old as the hills but a classic.

I can't remember them all but for 4 inches it said "just a toy" then for bigger it said different things. I googled it. A condom came up with about the same sayings.

Best of luck
 Imakeyoulaff
Joined: 5/10/2009
Msg: 81
How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 5/31/2009 11:00:24 AM

Oh, sh1t..Thanks..I just penetrated myself with a ruler..How do I explain THAT to the doctor?...


Just tell him you were walking around naked looking for a ruler and when you sat down....oops, you left it on the chair

Can you believe I read every post in this thread to see if anyone else said anything about that one comment? Yeah, I need a life :)
 thebrain2003
Joined: 10/20/2003
Msg: 82
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How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 6/2/2009 1:45:58 AM
For all of you , just visit the below link to have an idea what women want:
http://www.buzzfeed.com/peggy/the-authentic-womens-penis-size-preference-chart
 nipoleon
Joined: 12/27/2005
Msg: 83
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How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 6/2/2009 4:54:17 AM
Do you want the correct way, or the honest way ?
I'm only going to take out enough to win.
 NiceBlkGuyOhio
Joined: 3/22/2009
Msg: 84
How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 6/2/2009 7:37:50 PM
a chuckle.....lol
 flghtwings
Joined: 2/5/2008
Msg: 85
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How to measure ....
Posted: 6/5/2009 1:18:31 AM
Ya' know, it seems I remember reading somewhere that the nationality with the longest (on average) penises (or is it peni) was the native American indians, while the on average widest girth was the French. Anyone have any questions, feel free to call me, Geronimo Boudreaux, at 503-363-xxxx.......
 GoofBall311
Joined: 5/4/2009
Msg: 86
How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 6/5/2009 3:44:19 AM
I like my penis. Of course, girls just want the biggest****imaginable.
 MistaPepperZ
Joined: 2/2/2008
Msg: 87
How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 6/5/2009 9:36:51 AM
Thank you for informing me on how to measure my****

Hmm...would you like to offer me viagra now? Come on, don't be shy. No need to be deterred because my finger is near the delete button. I won't delete you. I promise.
 wayfarer4you
Joined: 3/24/2009
Msg: 88
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How to measure ....
Posted: 6/5/2009 11:13:40 AM
wow, I have laughed so freaking hard .Thank's O>P. and to those lady's and gents who took this for what is ,,,,I had to walk away from the PUTTER to clear my eye's and grab the yard stick ,just to check thing's out (you know and be in the know) and will now state that if I was a flea I'd be one hung sumbioyuch !!!!! ,,,, but I will say I've read many book's on 'how to please a lady "and well the page turning has turned many off but some did like the papper cut's . later dater's ,, mike
 HSJS
Joined: 7/7/2007
Msg: 89
How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 6/5/2009 1:33:32 PM
Dear that_girl,

I sense a bit of hostility in every letter of every word that you wrote. You seem to have way too much time on your hands, which gave you the opportunity to write so much, on such an insipid subject. Your time would be better spent if you use it, to seek professional psychiatric help, to work out your vitriol and the palpable antisocial peristalsis of your mind.

There must be other things that are far more important to your day-to-day existence, than how the men you have encountered measure or delude themselves about the endowment between their legs.
 3Therm0pylae0
Joined: 5/11/2009
Msg: 90
How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 6/5/2009 1:43:16 PM
Funny, true and obviously extra hilarious this chick is actually trying to give GUYS instructions on how to use hand-tools! WTF, ROFLMAO! She's got a point about guys lying about there junk though.
 That_girl*
Joined: 9/29/2008
Msg: 91
How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 6/5/2009 2:07:18 PM
HSJS
an the rest who failed to see that i didn't personally hand write it thats what i said in the begining that i copied it from another womans page,, an obvioulsy if it wasn't a problem woman an man then wouldn't have to post an write about it or things like this or think it was "offensive or funny or truthful..

so if you want to blame somebody then blame urself for ur small endowment an the original author of this funny but yet truthful post....

o an hello to everybody eles who thought it was funny an found it to be truthful in parts,, pay no attention to the haters..
 tallshyman
Joined: 1/1/2008
Msg: 92
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How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 6/5/2009 2:31:49 PM
Where can I meet a size queen?
I'm single and lonely
 Some Other Guy Too
Joined: 5/25/2009
Msg: 93
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How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 6/5/2009 8:00:07 PM
Well thanks chochis, I was beginning to feel like a freak after reading the post. I wear a full jacket and learned how to keep it smelling fresh. You are the first to mention anything about bare headedness v.s. really natural.
By the way I've never any any complaints and I've kept the women happy.
 DudeistPriest
Joined: 3/30/2009
Msg: 94
How to measure ....
Posted: 6/20/2009 11:55:32 AM
Sounds like some ones been watching to much Rescue Me!

My personal results; 2.5/7.25
that's nothing to shake a stick at!
 DudeistPriest
Joined: 3/30/2009
Msg: 95
How to measure ....
Posted: 6/20/2009 11:59:24 AM
And did you know that we lose an inch for every 10lbs of excess body fat. Call it the snowdrift effect. So if you want a bigger schartzenhiemer, lose some weight!
I could be HUGE!
 HandyDom
Joined: 10/31/2004
Msg: 96
How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 6/20/2009 4:50:35 PM
Heh, I've always said I'm 6". Seems about right. Girth is larger than a toilet paper roll as well. Is it really possible that you could have a penis that thin? If so, you just need that roll, a sock, and never need a woman in your life I'd imagine.
 keys2thesoul
Joined: 6/5/2009
Msg: 97
How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 6/20/2009 8:16:25 PM
Wikipedia Lifestyles study
For Length
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Penis_percentile.svg
and Girth
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Penis_circum_percentile.svg

By the Charts, an 8 inch penis, is in the top percentile. It's one in 100.
A 6 inch Girth is also 1:100

Most guys think they are below average, because they constantly hear about these outliers. This is because the only guys who talk about their size are the ones on the extreme right of the bell curve. How many guys here took the opportunity to say they were average or below? Incredible how anxiety provoking the subject can be. I am 'well proportioned' and all through my teens I thought I was below average in endowment.
 GoofBall311
Joined: 5/4/2009
Msg: 98
How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 6/21/2009 1:46:12 AM
"Lied" to you about their**** Why are you asking dudes how big their****is in the first place? That seems awfully crude. So, you go home with some guy thinking he has a big**** because you asked, and because he didn't want you to leave him, he lies. Then you get him in bed, and oops, it's really small and you are disgusted and you think "that worthless lying pig!" You put him in an insanely awkward position in the first place. I have an above-average size**** but if a girl asks how big I am, it usually really turns me off, because that's an improper question to ask, because what if I didn't? You're setting the man up for failure. I didn't even measure my****for the longest time because what's the point? I finally did out of curiosity, but men should not be expected to do this. Women aren't expected to get calipers and measure the circumference of their vaginas. Men do notice how tight a vagina is, but are tactful enough not to comment on it.
 GoofBall311
Joined: 5/4/2009
Msg: 99
How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 6/21/2009 5:13:46 AM
DarkHorse, do you even know what "penis envy" is? Penis envy is a Freudian term. He believed that little girls were jealous of their dad because they wanted to have his penis instead of their inferior vaginas. Of course Freud's ideas were ridiculous, but do some research before you throw words out!
 hellgremlin
Joined: 5/23/2009
Msg: 100
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How to measure your D ick the correct way..
Posted: 6/21/2009 5:15:09 AM
"You'll hear a lot of women talking trash about guys with small dicks. A lot of guys get very embarassed by this, because they think that if they have a small dick they can't pleasure a woman. The trick is to not care about pleasuring a woman. Just treat them like a gym sock - something to jerk off in and throw away. Suddenly, size doesn't matter anymore."

I forget who said this, but it's hilarious.
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