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 teetotaller1
Joined: 11/30/2011
Msg: 170
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LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE! Page 7 of 18    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)
[Who cares? If you really have that attitude, then put your real age. You'll attract other people who don't care.]

My dilemma is all my life I have had to convince people that I am really older than I look.
I often have to convince custom officers that I am really the age declared in my passport and that is really annoying.

I have posted my real age once with my photo here and I get men writing to me accusing me of posting an old photo of myself when it was a recent one.

SO check my profile , I have posted my recent photos , guess my age then.
 Arlo_Troutman
Joined: 9/26/2009
Msg: 171
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/10/2011 4:26:36 PM
I see the word "selfish" is starting to put in an appearance. I wish the people using it would just come clean with what they REALLY mean: "*MY* selfish is fine, but *SOMEONE ELSE'S* selfish is bad!" The lack of introspection that people show before shooting off their mouths is amusing...

Arlo...
 JCinVicBC
Joined: 6/17/2011
Msg: 172
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LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/11/2011 5:11:31 AM

Age isn't just a number, I've believed that in the past but I don't anymore. You can make too big a deal out of age to be sure but to say it's completely irrelevant is absurd as well. It's part of what defines you, if you deny that then you're avoiding reality.


The number itself is basically irrelevant. It's the life lived that lies behind that number that defines a person. But different people live different lives, and different people have different life experiences, and age differently, within the same number of years. That is what makes us who we are, not the number of years we've lived.

At best, the age allows for generalizations and approximations, and categorization. There's nothing remotely exact about it, but it's usually easier to generalize with exceptions, than to cover an entire range of possibilities. I've noticed, for example, that my attraction to women tends to decline significantly as they pass a point usually sometime between 30 and 35, yet some women already look 45 by the time they hit 30, and some get to 40 still looking like they're 25. So age is a useful tool for me to indicate whom I'm more likely or less likely to be interested in, but it's at best imprecise.
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 173
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/11/2011 7:05:58 AM

age is just a number..I am really 99 some days and 58 on other days..but most times I prefer the child in me. ..so really I enjoy most being 5...

I hang out with people half my age and find those in my age range rather sedate and truly over the hill in both mental and physical attitude..

I am really 58 going on 25...or am I..? who cares.


But your profile says that you are 48! Is that a lie or is the "58" you post here a typo or hyperbole?

Age is much more than a number, and those who claim otherwise in order to validate why they hang out with other people belie their claims. If age is "just" a number, why make a big deal out of it? Why lie about it on a profile? Why hang out with people half your age? Why not hang out with people twice your age who also consider age as just a number?

That you would lie about your age indicates that it is much more than a number to you: those who protest their age is but a number are afraid of their age.

I have met quite a few men who have lied about their age. I recently saw a profile of a former co-worker who USED to be older than I am but is suddenly three years younger. A man whom I used to date was also older than I am and he, too, was suddenly younger than I am! Both of these men have gray hair and enough wrinkles to embarrass a Shar-Pei: they aren’t fooling anyone.

There are recreational lies, but lying about age is not one. It is a deliberate lie for gain.


The number itself is basically irrelevant.


Tell that to someone who is 18 and someone who is 88--of course it is relevant.
 pastyandtasty
Joined: 6/16/2011
Msg: 174
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/11/2011 7:34:46 AM
I've seen more people lie about their jobs or having one more than anything.. Then again, I'm a white male... Lol
 kcladyz
Joined: 8/7/2009
Msg: 175
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/11/2011 7:54:12 AM
I know it is frustrating then you got those putting up photos taken in the 1960's now that is a laugh
 teetotaller1
Joined: 11/30/2011
Msg: 176
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LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/11/2011 10:19:55 AM
Gwendolyn,
Thanks to my good genes, all my adult life I have been a victim of ageism.
Born with a baby face that does not age, I have had to work very hard to be validated as a professional because my clients, bosses and colleagues often thought I looked 'too young' for the job.

Indeed , I have been accused of posting photos taken 10 years ago; or I have touched up my photo or that I have undergone plastic surgery..when I post here as 48 , never mind 58..Yes, I am a proud 58 year-old trapped in a 30 year-old body. It is tedious having to constantly explain that you are much older than you look..and given half a chance I would rather put myself down as 'AGELESS' if this site allows for creativity.

Indeed, I have posted myself as 80 with a picture of an old Chinese lady here, but lo and behold, I got even more male mail because they thought I was just being cheeky if not satirical.

In fact, I note with interest that you yourself have stated in your profile that you find that you have little in common with many women in your age range...welcome to the protest club..I am a rebel and refuse to be boxed by my age range too..

I hang out with people from 14 to 74 , in my skate crowd and my toastmasters club.
To me what is relevant is not chronological age but common interests that could nurture rapport and relationship.

So what is relevant?
Unless we are vintage wine, car, antique or fossil , age would probably add premium and affect the price, otherwise, age means we are nearer the end of our journey...
so why let age box us in, since we will eventually exit in one.

I believe in living my shoe size which will forever be UK34 or US5 , both compatible for lots of fun and frolic..:)
 Gwendolyn2010
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 177
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/11/2011 1:19:18 PM
teetotaller, I can understand your points about ageism, and if you had not lied about your age on your profile then stated that age is but a number, I never would have said anything!


In fact, I note with interest that you yourself have stated in your profile that you find that you have little in common with many women in your age range...welcome to the protest club..I am a rebel and refuse to be boxed by my age range too..


My statement about not having much in common with women my age is a prelude to "warn" men that if their children and grandchildren are their main focus, we won't have much in common.

In truth, I don't have much in common with a LOT of people, period.


so why let age box us in, since we will eventually exit in one.


I agree, you look young, but by making it an issue, you put yourself in another box! I KNOW that I could put my age as younger than 59 and no one would challenge me--but what's the point? Not only is it a lie, but it is a lie that I would have to maintain.

Sadly, the greatest majority of people who lie about their ages really do not look younger than they are. Every time that I have given a man the benefit of the doubt when he claimed to be younger, he let it slip and I knew he had lied. If he lied about that, what else would he lie about?
 rec_diver
Joined: 11/13/2011
Msg: 178
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/11/2011 1:39:18 PM
Paderic: Like most dishonest behavior, it is rooted in selfishness. Someone that lies about their age is telling you that their desire to date someone in your age range supersedes your wish to not date someone in theirs.


Nice!

Doesn't get any clearer than that.

Of course if you ran that statement by one of the selfish liars they'd say "I'm not being selfish I'm really much younger than my age and I don't want a potential partner to miss a great opportunity, so I'm actually doing them a favor by deceiving them!"
 JCinVicBC
Joined: 6/17/2011
Msg: 179
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LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/12/2011 4:29:19 AM

Tell that to someone who is 18 and someone who is 88--of course it is relevant.


Well, ok, yes, there are certain specific ages where the number is, in fact relevant, generally for legal reasons. But the specific numbers are, for the most part, fairly arbitrary--it still has no specific meaning or relevance. 16 (age of consent here, and legal age to marry and drive); 18 (legal adult here, drinking age in Quebec); 19 (drinking age here); 21 (drinking age in much of the US); 55/65 (retirement age, depending on jurisdiction); every year after 90.
 moutainbreeze
Joined: 10/19/2011
Msg: 180
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/12/2011 6:22:14 AM
Yeah, I met a guy who claimed to be 40 and 5'10. He was very nice. However, at 5'5.5" I was staring at his forehead.. and he looked closer to 60. Needless to say, that did not work out. If a guy has to lie like that just to get a woman to talk to him, I am not interested.

So yeah I hear ya!

You're right, if a guy thinks it is okay to lie about those things, what else will he lie about. I have no tolerance for liars. Way too much drama for me. And yeah, if you or I came off claiming to be fit but were actually 100 pounds overweight, these same guys would soil themselves with complaints about that. Too ridiculous.

But then, most guys do not even read the profiles, they just picture search and then you get pestered to no end by men who are just plain odd.
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 181
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/12/2011 8:03:33 AM
Welcome to cyber space. One can be what they want to be until they get caught. I saw on my profile that I had hit 59 instead of 49 and after two days you can't change it...first I thought "It doesn't matter, I look younger. But, when my honesty policy came to the front, "Honesty is always the best policy", I made a retraction. I agree that If one lies about one little thing, they will lie about the bigger things as well.


How can you possibly make a mistake like this on your birth year? This is exactly
what people are talking about here. Profiles that lie about their age and then attempt
to casually correct it by saying they "made a mistake".

I don't think anyone believes for a minute this was a mistake. I'd have to be some
dumb bunny to accidently hit 1962 instead of 1952 when I'm asked my year of birth.



 rec_diver
Joined: 11/13/2011
Msg: 182
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/12/2011 11:08:59 AM
browneyesboo:
I don't think anyone believes for a minute this was a mistake. I'd have to be some
dumb bunny to accidently hit 1962 instead of 1952 when I'm asked my year of birth.


Hey speak for yourself!

My thought is either:

1- low functioning individual with borerline IQ that can't hit the right button on their computer and is so careless and lazy that they never check their profile when they're done editing to see the wrong year is right up there

or

2- another deceptive fogly (fat/old/ugly)

Probably both.

* sigh *

I hope I don't have to reactivate my dating profile and deal with this crap again!
 Portlanderr
Joined: 9/29/2010
Msg: 183
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/12/2011 2:51:16 PM
I caught a guy in an "age lie" on another site, he said he was 53, his one picture looked like a 53 year old man. We had been sending messages for a few days, then all of a sudden he was 69 years old. So I questioned him about it via e-mail, and he confessed that he "corrected" his date of birth, and that his picture sort of looked like him, but more like his brother. Two lies -- too much for me. I cancelled the date we had set up.

A few weeks later he emailed me again, wanting to get together, he hoped I would reconsider, that the only reason he put himself down as 53 was to attract younger women in their late 40's or early 50's. I blocked him!
 Sparkledustpajamas
Joined: 12/3/2011
Msg: 184
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/12/2011 6:50:31 PM
I've noticed 3 profiles of guys who have their age listed as 18, when they look to be late 20s to early 30s.
 substance01
Joined: 8/31/2010
Msg: 185
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/13/2011 4:08:55 AM
I am encountering this here and another dating site that I am on. When these men are "caught" regarding their real age, I haven't encountered a single one who thinks it's misleading or dishonest. I'm baffled by that and turned off to say they least! My first thought is "If he is lying about something like this, what else is he lying about?"

i hear you and join you on this. i met a man here in POF whom i had met in person two days ago, he posted 41 on his profile age, his pic showed a bronzed nice looking well groomed Italian. What turned up instead and hid around a corner from the cafe he chose viewing me from his "Scouting view" was an uncooked cookie dough speckled man with loads of wrinkles, no front teeth and rotting gums..and his age was 51. He had lied before meeting me stating he had 3 children and 2 ex wives, agreed to meet me ONLY as friends then changed once he saw me, confessing i was the woman of his dreams, and that he actually had 3 ex wives and 6 children, showing me a pic of one of the ex wives on his iphone...she was in her 20's and filled with botox he claimed to have paid for. The reality is: if they will lie to themselves first u can bet your bottom dollar they will u next...fear is their core and until they face their own lies neither they or you will develop a healthy sustainable relationship...have i moved on?..you bet so can you

i have yet to find the safest way to making a real connection rom the "kiss the toads until you find the prince" path..have you?
 substance01
Joined: 8/31/2010
Msg: 186
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/13/2011 4:12:09 AM
"If you don't represent yourself honestly on your profile, I'm not interested in meeting you"


hear hear well said!
i agree with you
 lacalli
Joined: 11/27/2011
Msg: 187
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/13/2011 11:45:25 AM
I think that can blow up in your face because several times in the past I was contacted by men younger than me who made it clear they were very interested and when I told them they were too young they told me they had lied about their age and were actually older than me. Duh.
 SeaCatcher
Joined: 9/11/2011
Msg: 188
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/27/2011 3:25:24 PM
Found this incredible statement on a pof profile:

IM NOT 48 IM 40 CANT CHANGE THIS STUPID

Details 51 year old ...

Not 48, am 40, or could be 51. Geeezzzz
 HarDayKnight
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 189
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 12/29/2011 9:14:07 AM
I've noticed 3 profiles of guys who have their age listed as 18, when they look to be late 20s to early 30s.


Those b@st@rds! How dare they try to fool a 39 year old woman into dating an over the hill 20 something man.



___________________________________


My age is correct, but I can understand the temptation to lie online. It sucks to get older and look around to see a dating pool that hasn't made nearly the effort to stay in shape that you have... And for the few that have to eliminate you based on your age.
 amethystdancer14
Joined: 8/27/2011
Msg: 190
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 1/1/2012 3:53:24 AM
Its annoying isn't it that people think they can fool you. This one gent put up four photos on his profile. There is a very obvious difference in age between the first two and the last two that he is very much older than what his profile age says even to the point that his hair is very much greyer and thinner in the last two photos. His explanation was "Oh those photos were taken after a day out in the sun" Well if he ages that much from a day in the sun then I think he needs to buy stock in a sunscreen company!
 professora
Joined: 7/28/2008
Msg: 191
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LYING & more....
Posted: 1/3/2012 3:55:21 PM
I had this happen recently with Sandy-- from another site. Since I am 65- i'm ok meeting someone 3-5 years my junior or senior BUT not more than that.

This fellow was 83! He kept insisting that "you would never know if I had not told you."

REALLY??

ALSO-- have Googled people. I learned that a dentist (imagine how many patients he overcharged or lied to?) I went out with one time was 11 yrs above what he stated.

ONE date...no more.

I still have fun :)
 MyScreennameRox
Joined: 12/11/2011
Msg: 192
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 1/3/2012 7:32:57 PM
I went on a date last summer with this gal who claimed to be 34, but it turns out she was 45.
 ponygt
Joined: 12/26/2011
Msg: 193
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LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 1/3/2012 8:12:16 PM
Interesting thing for me, is I VERY much prefer an older woman. In fact, I have my preferences set to be from 35-50....and I'm 33. I've pretty much always been into older women, but I have dated younger ones and when I have, it just reminds me why I prefer not too. I can't stand game playing, immaturity, drama, etc. And in my experience, the chances of dealing with that goes WAY down the higher in age they are.


The down side?...I don't doubt for a second if an older/mature woman checks out my profile they probably think I'm just looking for a sugar momma, or some good looking 'cougar' to show off. But hey, if they're going to assume and not take the time to find out what I'm like, that's their loss.
 OYSTER1000
Joined: 8/3/2011
Msg: 194
LYING ABOUT AGE ON DATING PROFILE!
Posted: 1/4/2012 4:50:46 PM
There is a woman on here who says "47" at the top and after a 15 minute profile states that she posted her age wrong on purpose due to "ageism and age range preferences", she is actually 55 and looks like she is 55, she says she is not lying because she tells you inn the end, I strongly disagree, am I wrong?
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