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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?      Home login  
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 seekndestroy
Joined: 8/20/2008
Msg: 13
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?Page 3 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
well forumologist, clearly you are too fast for me and obviously nothing gets past you!!!

I hate women, im missing several teeth, have no job and live with my parents, i am sooooo ugly and huge that my dog runs every time i call his name (not sure if he's afraid of my looks or that i'll eat him if he comes). about the only thing that i have going for me is that i no longer need to spend loads of money on shampoo, but then again since im so big i cant even get up from the couch, i havent really taken a shower in years..... actually now that i think about it, i dont really hate women.... i hate myself but cope by taking it out on women... as for my gf i made her up.... she is the hottest woman to have ever been made on a computer.... not only is she hot, but she also cooks me the 20 lbs of food i eat every day and changes my diaper.... all with a smile !!!!

now if you are gonna do some bashing then have at it but please dont do me any favors and try to be somewhat civilized about it.... go all out !!! personally i think its funny that ppl take offense to other's opinions... no wonder everyone is so PC these days
 Zephyr2553
Joined: 12/28/2008
Msg: 14
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/2/2009 4:23:45 PM
Personally, I am a tomboy type. I do carpentry work, have long pretty natural nails, have long blonde hair mixed with red highlights, am average build with a nice rack, drove a semi for nearly 4 years...

I work in the yard and on my car...hood up...grease monkey....

Then I go in the house, shower, put on my little black dress, display the "wares", strap on my Evan Piccone shoes, apply my "exotic" makeup, don the jewelry pat my a** for good luck and hit the clubs.......

I love to camp, fish, hunt, hike, swim and sail....BUT, I'm a total girly girl.

My head is found quite often in a good book or doing research or writing poetry or an article or short story, or painting with Craypa's or chalk.

So, what's the big deal????? PEOPLE of either sex, of any socio-economic background, political leaning...etal, can be anything they want or aspire to be.

I might be unrecognizable one minute, covered with dirt and grime and the next smell like Chanel with smooth silky skin....I don't get it!
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 15
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is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/2/2009 7:34:04 PM
Okay, I only read part of the first page but I think I see a pattern. First you find Angelina Jolie attractive, well not many women have bodies that weight less than their lips and have 6 children and who's to say she's not a nagging battleaxe, you are only going by her looks. You say your ex was the right look but not the right personality, yet there's AJ whom you don't know from chit but you assume if you met her while doing your thing the perfect woman would have walked into your life, so you spend a lot of time thinking about imaginary women instead of finding a real women who meets your needs. So I'm guessing you date women whom you feel you've settled for while waiting for something more AJ looking who can hunt and play football.....you see the pattern?

I'm sure there are attractive slim women who would like to do all the stuff you do but I also imagine it's hard to look good for very long if they attempted to do the things you do. I mean you look pretty messy in the pictures, how's a women who's fussy about her looks and weight going to do all that and still manage to look all gussied up? I know a lot of women who do the things you like but they also look pretty roughed up like you, for the same reasons. Anyway, what's your current girlfriend look like? Does she cut the mustard for you?
 onefishwilldo
Joined: 4/1/2009
Msg: 16
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/2/2009 8:23:38 PM
Well, I am assuming that those activities seem fairly manly, and may be most of these women are Tomboyish and don’t like to wear make-up (I’m assuming here), like when you go hunting…the animals (the creatures, not the men) are not going to care what you look like. You don’t have to be thin to be beautiful. Beauty is within, so I heard. We are all individual and we each have our own little personality and attitude. :)
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 17
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is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/2/2009 8:31:53 PM



A 300 pound 75 year old angry drunk drugged out truck stop waitress with no teeth and is a single mother to 14 children, each from a different convict baby daddy, who spits when she talks is probably not going to get away with being really mean to most men and still get what she wants. (In fact, even if she's nice, she still might not get what she wants from men)


And yet she's had at least 14 men and is still active enough to work and get men into bed. Let's face it, many really ugly people get laid and get partners and in fact some of them get partners that make people wonder how it happened. And I'm not meaning through wealth, we all see really trashy people with dates/marriages and lots of kids. Ugly people seem to be more likely in fact according to all the whining from good looking people who can't seem to find someone.
 Zephyr2553
Joined: 12/28/2008
Msg: 18
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/2/2009 10:56:35 PM

That's a bit harsh...I worked for professor for a time who appeared pretty dowdy, but who was a brilliant intellect, and original character in every way. Her passion for her work was inspiring, and I can assure you she moved up the career ranks rapidly as she deserved to do. She was no "piker" and would have been far from content to put in twenty years of service for a gold watch. She had (and still has ) a loving and sexy husband who adored her and wrote poetry and music inspired by her.

Your opinion seems a bit at odds with the first part of your post:


Well, Marianne, my apologies to your friend, but maybe your definition of 'dowdy' differs from mine. Sometimes the treasures within a person are so brilliant that nothing but a plain wrapper will do. To be vibrant and colorful would be gilding the lily.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 19
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is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/2/2009 11:38:40 PM
I gave in and looked up Megan Fox, she's a very young women who looks like a skinny Kardashsian, as in Keeping Up with the Kardashians (spelling optional). Hard to tell what she really looked like, she had on 20 pounds of make up and pumped up lips.
 DocElffington
Joined: 1/20/2009
Msg: 20
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is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/3/2009 12:12:14 AM
"What comes around, goes around!"

OP: These forums are littered with men complaining about womens' unrealistic expectations.
Now you've gone and done it by revealing our unrealistic expectations about them!


Why? Cuz her mascara would smear up the lens on the scope! And the dear would smell her makeup long before you'd ever see it!

Besides.........asphalt on a really hot day is hell in stilettos. Let alone some backwoods trail!

Not to mention, you do NOT want a woman whom feels the need to put make-up on........just to check the mail.


In summary, if you want a catch? Be a catch! Which you are not now.
 8soldierfalcon8
Joined: 2/16/2009
Msg: 21
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/3/2009 3:47:24 AM

the question still remains though... does looks have a significant impact on a woman's personality? does she feel she needs to be more assertive with men (approach rather than waiting to be hit on) if she is less attractive? is she less/more likely to get upset if her man looks at another woman? is she more/less prone to get jealous? is she more tolerant of her man's interests?

my ex was attractive and thin, yet turned out to be controlling, nagging, intolerant of everything and all she ever wanted to do on weekends was to either sit around in front of the tv (w/out conversation) or go to whatever event SHE wanted to go to... yet her very unattractive sister was the opposite... raised by the same parents, same environment, same genes, etc etc... only difference was their looks. what gives?


I've noticed this too. And I concur that it's usually the case. Almost every single girl I've ever dated has been a late bloomer. In my experience, less attractive women generally develop more of a personality and an interesting life. I think a lot of it goes back to hs and college. Girls who are really pretty in those social arenas are catered attention to on a daily basis. Less attractive girls have to actually work for attention, and spend more time developing what it is that makes them who they are.

In my opinion, late bloomers are where it's at. For men too, ladies. This die falls both ways. The only way I've ever found it possible to date a woman I find both physically and emotionally attractive is to meet a late bloomer.

ymmv
 8soldierfalcon8
Joined: 2/16/2009
Msg: 22
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/3/2009 4:28:36 AM

You have obviously not met many goodlooking women and being goodlooking does not necassarily mean being thin some very curvacious larger women are very attractive just as some bigger built men ooze sex appeal.


Uhhh... whatever. By the way, punctuation is your friend. You should get to know him/her better.

"Curvacious" to me means "vixen". My x fiance' was 5'5, about 130 lbs, a size 5 in jeans, and was a 34DDD. That is curvacious. Fat is not curvacious. Fat is lazy.

I know. I got fat when I was a restaurant manager and I've been working like crazy to get it all off. There is nothing sexy about being unhealthy.

Thank you.
 8soldierfalcon8
Joined: 2/16/2009
Msg: 23
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/3/2009 4:32:53 AM

You have obviously not met many goodlooking women and being goodlooking does not necassarily mean being thin some very curvacious larger women are very attractive just as some bigger built men ooze sex appeal.
Maybe you are going for looks too much and they notice this and it puts them off, even very pretty girls are not stupid they are used to guys chasing after them and are not impressed by someone going after them just for their looks and prefer to have someone who likes them for themself and who they get along with.


Double posts are not your friend. Or anyone else's. And everyone likes to be told that their partner finds them attractive.

I really hate to break it to you, but men are visual - most women are to some degree too. If it were only men who found thin, healthy women attractive, there would not be a bajillion weight loss pills out there, and 50% of every magazine for women wouldn't be about losing weight.

Being an awesome person takes hard work and self discipline. Past the age of 18, most people with nice bodies work to have it. This is respectable.
 8soldierfalcon8
Joined: 2/16/2009
Msg: 24
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/3/2009 4:42:46 AM

Oh Plaeeeeze!


Fat is lazy.

Some women (and men) don't have it in their genes to be skinny little waifs. That doesn't mean they are lazy, or unhealthy!


Overweight is overweight regardless of body style. Lucy Lawless for instance is NOT a small girl - but she is very beautiful and has a wonderful physique.

Seriously - a larger frame is not an excuse to pack on 50 lbs. Come on, folks. This is not rocket science. It's not about looks - it's about health. I find is highly ironic and disgusting that our society places such a huge emphisis on smoking, while walmart furnishes motorized carts for all the disgustingly obese person to drive around in. Because walking may be too hard, ya know.

It all reminds me of Wall-E.
 8soldierfalcon8
Joined: 2/16/2009
Msg: 25
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/3/2009 4:44:20 AM
And Cityhorsewoman, I don't get where you're coming from.

You look great, and you have a physique that most other women in their early 40s would kill to have. You are an "attractive woman".

??confused??
 8soldierfalcon8
Joined: 2/16/2009
Msg: 26
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/3/2009 4:52:08 AM
Well, all 3 words are obviously very much context laden and subject to the relative mores of whoever is doing the term-slinging.

Personally, I think that a healthy BMI is a pretty good indicator. Beyond that, some people have more attractive features than others.

Just simple things such as the way a person (especially a woman) dresses can have a huge effect.

Getting back to the original question posted by the OP, I do believe that how we are treated at younger ages in school has a HUGE effect on who we become as adults. Vapid, self centered airheads don't even really change in personality - even after they have a couple of kids and gain 100 lbs.

Sweet, intelligent, artistic girls stay that way even after they grow some boobs and a smoking hot bod. A large number of actresses, dancers, and musicians who are both clever, humble, and beautiful were late bloomers and were bullied in school.

This is the gist of my point. It's illogical to say that people who are treated in very different ways growing up will not develop into different people. There are always exceptions to the rule - like I graduated with a Miss Washington from hs... and she was ALWAYS an incredible, exceptionally nice person. However, I think a large portion of this was due to her upbringing and naturally vibrant personality.
 barbee1970
Joined: 12/29/2008
Msg: 27
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/3/2009 5:00:09 AM
Oh yeah, a supermodel type woman hunting and killing an animal or into dirt bikes. OOps! she might break a nail or melt if she gets a little dirty.
 8soldierfalcon8
Joined: 2/16/2009
Msg: 28
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/3/2009 5:15:19 AM

Thank you for the compliments 8soldierfalcon8.

I don't like to be judgemental about people based on their physical stature. There could be many reasons why one is overweight or big.

We live in a society where we are so pressured to look sexy and young and under 30 forever. Some people will never read past the cover of the book to look inside to read the chapters, and it is a shame.

Big or small, attractive or unattractive, it is all in their attitude and how much one loves themselves, life and other people. That is what gets reflected outward and in the long run, confidence and being genuine is what (most) people appreciate.

Does that make sense?


Yes, it actually does. I understand. I would rather date an average looking girl who loves herself than a drop dead gorgeous woman with issues. My problem is with some of the posters on here calling "thin and pretty" girls, "supermodels". I go to school with women from 18-50, and I am fairly certain that none of them are beautiful for a living. However, it's pretty easy to tell who takes care of their appearance and who does not. I believe that (with few exceptions) there is no such thing as an ugly woman - only a lazy one. I think women are gorgeous, gorgeous creatures. And the fact that a woman has the intellect and humor of a human being makes women as a whole to be admired. This in a nutshell is why I will die a chivalrous man.


You look great, and you have a physique that most other women in their early 40s would kill to have. You are an "attractive woman".
LOL "Most women in their early 40's would kill to have" OMG you are a piece of work soldierboy...This is very similar to, you look great, for your age....LOL


No, I said she is an attractive woman. Not attractive for her age. I'm sorry you've got some serious issues and perhaps a nasty case of TSS... but seriously, get over it. I've noticed that all the ignorant, borderline re-re people who insult me on here always try to make some (witty?) word play on my handle and don't bother to even extend the respect of typing it out the whole way.

Bravo, random, bitter, older, jealous woman! You're a peach.
 8soldierfalcon8
Joined: 2/16/2009
Msg: 29
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/3/2009 5:30:22 AM
Thank you for being so gracious, Cityhorsewoman. And I meant every word I said. You look phenomenal and you obviously have a huge heart. You're probably the type of woman the OP was talking about being desirable.

I am ignoring the poster before you who in typical message board fashion, is pretending she was joking after she got pwned in the face.

:P
 Zephyr2553
Joined: 12/28/2008
Msg: 30
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/3/2009 7:17:28 AM

Oh yeah, a supermodel type woman hunting and killing an animal or into dirt bikes. OOps! she might break a nail or melt if she gets a little dirty.


Serious misconception! Didn't ANYBODY read my post?? It is quite possible, even probable that someone who takes pride in their appearance and their health, who loves to dress up, look like an Elle cover model, can also ride dirt bikes, hunt, fish, camp, ride Segways, kayak, write, create, clean the scum off the garage floor when the trash bag leaked...

....hold her man's arm in her Armani and stilleto's with her scumptuous bootylicious self attracting all kinds of attention and get that nail fixed if it breaks....

Geeze, some of them even have kids, change diapers, keep a clean, organized house and take part in the community!!!

IMAGINE THAT!
 SueCat51
Joined: 8/11/2007
Msg: 31
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is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/3/2009 10:09:56 AM
Don't know about others, but I love to camp, fish, horseback ride, snorkel, ride bikes, and just about anything out doors. I'm probably going to look a bit frumpy or less "runway fashion" oriented, because I simply can't imagine pedaling my bike with a short dress and 6 inch heels.
 Zephyr2553
Joined: 12/28/2008
Msg: 32
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/3/2009 10:43:56 AM
Thank you DiamondGirl and Sue!!! I don't know where people get the idea women have to be either this way or that. Or if you happen to be good at plumbing or sheet rock or fixing your own car, you have to be a jock and be as plain as a brown paper sack.

OR, that if you happen to be pretty, fit and into makeup, extensions, the latest fashions, heels and shoes, navel piercing and feel good when you look like you just stepped off the pages of a fashion magazine, you would faint at a broken nail or smudged lipstick.....
 DocElffington
Joined: 1/20/2009
Msg: 33
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is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/6/2009 9:40:18 AM

you can't judge a book by its cover


Yes, but you CAN discern a lot of info about the book, from it's cover!

Is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance? Only in so much as her appearance MAY afford her access to a more broad educational/experiential base, which would obviously affect her personality!
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 34
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 5/6/2009 11:29:58 AM

why is it that the "attractive" women simply arent so much fun to be around?

Maybe they are just unattractive to you???? My exhusband is a professional hunting guide, obsessive hunter. He's also hilarious, intelligent and stunning in appearance. I don't think he suffered for attention in the past and I know he doesn't suffer today for the company of beautiful women (yes, plural ~ he's not the "fence me in type" ~ HA...maybe that's why we divorced? **snicker**) who love to roam the wilderness killing things with him. If you aren't finding someone attractive (to you) who likes those activities, maybe it isn't them with the perceived problem? (Just a thought.)
 BLUEMISS
Joined: 7/15/2007
Msg: 35
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is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 10/25/2009 6:19:06 PM
When I was younger I hung around with 3 beautiful sisters...dark hair,dark skin and really nice personalities. Hanging with them made me feel unattractive and they always got the guys I wanted.I always went for the [underdog] back then.I still have these girls as friends, altough we all live in different provinces, we were together last month and discussing guys from our past, and where they are at in life now. Somehow the guys I found to be attractive and a good catch back then are not so attractive to me or them anymore. lol .Last night one of my friends said,"You get better looking every time I see you," to which I replyed," Are you saying I was not good looking before?" lol..I feel the same about him,I didn't find him attractive when we met, but the more I know him, the better looking he is.Op...Why the remark anout being in a relationship and not looking [for now]? in your Msg 7... Better hope your girl doesn't see that.Looking for a more attractive one?
 BlueEyes1712
Joined: 4/24/2008
Msg: 36
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is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 10/25/2009 6:30:10 PM
Maybe you need to take up a different sport/activity. The pool room has some lookers, so does the roller and ice skating places. I would think killing bambie isnt high on thier lists. I think they say men are the hunters/warriors and women gatherers. Hows that for sterotyping?

Womens appearance can be deceptive. People dress for the activity they are going to perform. Personality has no bearing on appearance except for the fact that well dress can influence ones confidence, self esteem level. So I think its just the opposite, appearnce can effect personality. I say this because much of the world treats you based upon your appearance.
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 37
is a woman's personality directly related to her appearance?
Posted: 10/25/2009 8:06:40 PM
I would say it's affected by her appearance, heck yes. That doesn't mean "if she looks like this, her personality's going to be that". Many people's personality changes from point A to point B, if there's a ton of time in-between, and on a smaller scale with less time. Environmental factors have most to do with that, so obviously a change in looks will alter their personality in some way.

Sudden change of looks = change of personality. If she went from a size 20 to a size 4... or other changes that made her go from a 2/10 to over a 5/10, yeah her personality's going to change. She is going to be treated differently that she isn't used to... it's going to change to some degree for EVERY woman.

what i've come across a lot are women, who albeit, being unattractive to me, are just cool as hell and i find myself thinking "why couldnt she be thin and good looking?" they are outgoing, up for just about anything, spontaneous and just plain fun to be around.

If someone's not very attractive, they are more apt to optimize their other characteristics, moreso than someone who is very attractive, -all other things being equal-. Whether that be to be smarter/educated, putting more effort to be friendly & social, etc. Not getting hit on by "enough" guys they find reasonably attractive is going to affect their personality, duh. Women who are really attractive have more margin of error for the rest of their attributes when it comes to acceptance.

do good looking women think that their looks are enough? or that men will put up with their "boring" personality due to her looks?

Depends on their taste in guys. I think women want to look good to compete with other women being the main focus, not getting a guy directly (they just see that as a byproduct of it). But I do think that if a woman has a naturally "boring" personality, and she's Hot, she is much less likely to grow out of that and become less boring, than a plain Jane or doggy Debra.

I don't think they sit down and "adjust" their personality... I think it's just a natural evolution from experience that they become more friendly, less boring, etc., when they have less acceptance. Being attractive gains you more acceptance, sexually & non-sexually.

ALSO, though, one thing. -YOU- will find that unattractive ladies will be more friendly to You, as opposed to a gal out of your league. You can't ignore that, so don't judge your OWN experiences on how girls are AROUND YOU -- because that may not be who they are altogether, since some gals will act & be different around a guy they're not attracted to who may like them vs one they are vs other.
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