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 HerkimerD
Joined: 5/9/2009
Msg: 133
what do men consider overweight?Page 7 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
well as a guide,
when I give a hug, I like my hands to join.
G
 DocElffington
Joined: 1/20/2009
Msg: 137
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what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 6/11/2009 6:32:59 PM
I find women with over-inflated heads and egos, to be unattractive.
 forum101
Joined: 2/5/2008
Msg: 138
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what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 6/13/2009 10:14:04 PM
Im with shirley. An extra chin, and belly, hanging, is just fat. I dont care how athletic you think you are. BMI and height/ weight charts do not lie. get your head out of the clouds, guys and gals. I know, I know, really athletic, muscular people will have a higher BMI, but honestly, how many of us, on here, are like that?
When your waist is over 36 or bigger than a 14, need to rethink that I&O thing. You know when you are embarrassed to have someone see you naked. Most people on here can handle an extra 20 pounds or so, but when you actually have to move the rolls out of the way, it's time to take a real long look at yourself. Sorry, and I know I will get berated for this, but fat isnt attractive. Wouldnt it be great if it were? All you have to do, is start a walking regimen, take in less than you burn off. The average anymore is not necessarily healthy or normal. The average person these days, is overweight, or even obese. Because of the epidemic. We are all so used to seeing heavy people, we think it is normal. But is isnt.
 forum101
Joined: 2/5/2008
Msg: 140
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what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 6/13/2009 10:44:42 PM
Dont stress on the size thing. you know when you're embarassed to be seen naked. If you feel uncomfortable or self consious about your weight, you probably need to lose some.

14 top? I was thinking more waist and hip. I doubt anyone would fault you for having a bigger top.
 quietcowboy
Joined: 12/25/2007
Msg: 142
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what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 6/14/2009 6:33:43 AM
I've never liked skinny, but I can deal with it much more than obesed. As long as I can see some curves to a womans body I'm fine. Some people carry weight much better than others.
 quietcowboy
Joined: 12/25/2007
Msg: 144
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what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 6/14/2009 10:59:40 AM

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.


Have a conversation with several of you lady friends about what they are looking for in a man, and report back. If they are honest, physical characteristic will be part of the discussion - what you state isn't a one way street. BTW, you seem to have some of both so I don't think, men's vision should cost you any sleep.
 Strings6
Joined: 7/14/2007
Msg: 150
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what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 10/25/2009 5:51:33 AM
These threads always contain post that reference woman's ability to see beyond physical appearence and look at the "real" person...well judging from divorce statistics and the fact that there are alot of women on dating sites it would seem that the personality trumps all method might not be working out so well.

The fact is you can't fake looks,fat is fat,short is short and ugly is ugly....you can however fake a personality for a period of time.
I cannot count how many times i have heard a woman say..."he din't used to be that way"....or "he used to be so (insert personality trait here) but now he's different....well he was always what he is but he was smart enough to fool you.

I suggest that those who claim to be so above it all when it comes to looks and who look down on those who seek physical attraction in a mate as a standard stop and think that perhaps their methods are not without fault or flaw...becauase like i said they are here looking and trying again.......just like the rest of us "shallow superficial jerks"
 english lass
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 156
what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 10/25/2009 2:09:37 PM
from browsing some of these posts i'd say that what men consider as 'overweight' has less to do with bmi and recommended dr's weight, and more to do with personal preference - what's overweight/underweight to one, might be just what another is looking for

because it is so subjective, i'd advise being comfortable in your own skin or work to get that way, so you're happy with how you look or how fit you are... make that the priority rather than trying to match any supposed 'men's ideal', because there doesn't appear to be just one
 catkin2007
Joined: 12/18/2007
Msg: 157
what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 10/25/2009 2:19:48 PM
Well, having gone from what was referred to as sickly skinny a few years ago to having to take serious drugs to gain weight to fight an illness - I like my shape now. Overweight by society's standards yes, but I swim, walk, hike, and get out and about and my physician is happy with my weight. So, until he tells me otherwise, I'm okay with my body...

Besides, I've had more compliments from men at this weight more than I ever did skinny sick looking...
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 166
what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 10/25/2009 8:40:41 PM
The mirror holds no bias. The mirror is not judgemental nor is it prejudicial. The mirror never ever lies............... never !


Sweetie, I really hate to tell you this, but virtually every woman knows this to be true ~~ Some mirrors make you look like a horror show, others don't, and some flatter the sox off ya!

I was always surprised that The Hecht Company in DC ever sold a woman a single piece of clothing ~~ every mirror in their changing rooms belonged to class I.

Live. Learn.

 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 167
what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 10/25/2009 8:45:29 PM
Don't worry nobody thinks someone chiseled with MUSCLES is "fat".

Not every body. I dated a guy for a while who was on the Morgan State Football team. Something over 6'4", and gorgeous. The DC police department wouldn't hire him because he was "FAT." I'm here to promise you that man did not have one ounce of fat on his entire body. Period.

So much for "nobody."

 ben1man
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 168
what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 10/25/2009 8:50:18 PM
This is a subject that will always make men seem shallow or weak. You see if I were to tell you that overweight starts at a certain height and number of pounds then I would come off as being shallow and if I toyed with what is commonly referred t as being large but not specifically identify where the cut off between being big and being overweight I would come off as being weak because I wouldn’t put a definite on size differences. However I would rather seem shallow then to come off as weak and after some long thought on this subject I will conclude that every man will see women in different ways. I will offer my opinion on this subject and hope I do not offend anyone but the best way to look at what is what when it comes to women and size is to look in the back of mail order catalogues. There you will find depending on what company you are looking at a size chart that will offer sizes according to bust, waist and hip sizes they will follow up with a height chart to determine if a woman is considered petite, average or tall then they correlate all of that information to small, medium, large, extra larger and double X as well as putting the number sizes into the chart.

Now based on that bit of information I like to believe that if your wearing a medium you can consider yourself average. Its also safe to say that most men are or would love to have an average sized woman or smaller. However we would allow a large woman to be a part of our lives given some circumstances. As insensitive as I may sound I understand that people go through changes; childbirth is probably one of the biggest. So if a woman wears a large and has a child or two most guys are accepting to the changes that pregnancy has brought about. But lets say she is wearing a extra large then we become concerned if she is really a BBW (Big Bold Woman). There are some men who really go for larger women but I'm talking about averages here and not exceptions. Smaller women don't suffer the same fate as larger women mainly because with a small body men wont have a problem until you're so small that you look like a child or your skin seems to be falling off your bones (in other words sickly).

I would say that being on either ends of the spectrum is, liking to men who cant hold a job or have a place of their own; you know what I’m talking about the proverbial looser that a smart woman shouldn’t date. I would like to also take tis time to point out some traditional facts about society and how we look at women. The beauty and fashion industry sells us on the image of a flat stomach though more and more a bump is what a casual observer sees. So if you have a small bump, fine and dandy as long as you know that it means you will be doing crunches for weeks to work it off. But women are the customers to the fashion and beauty industry and as the customers you when you buy the magazines, dresses, makeup or accessories you say you’re comfortable with the image they are selling. Also for years and even today a man is measured by his success; the woman on his arm reflects that success so if a heavier woman were on the presidents arm most of us would look at him as unsuccessful. Deep down in the backs of our subconscious this is why men seek the thinner women in this country. The double standard is that if you are fat it’s acceptable even for women (look at Oprah Winfree) but you still have to have a partner that is in shape or at least fit looking. On a more shallow note which I realize will get me looked down upon (but I'm just being honest) its said that you can close your eyes and imagine a different face but you cant feel a different body no matter how hard you try. Point is if your on the larger side and a woman get with it and do the right thing so that you don't have to worry about if you are too large or not.
 joemac356
Joined: 9/22/2009
Msg: 179
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what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 10/28/2009 4:08:55 PM
Trying to gauge what "Men" think is overweight is like trying to gauge who "Men" think is the best guitar player. It's absolutely too subjective.
I tend to prefer against the grain, probably because of what I'm accustomed to. I grew up with three thin sisters and a trim mother. My brother and I were thin. My dad was thin/small/average. My cousins were all average or thin.
Every relationship of the romantic sort I've had, were with thin, even skinny, girls.
My first wifey was 5'0" and 88 pounds. She fit right on my lap quite well.

My ex of 27 years is 5'6' @ 115. Effortless spoon. (Was)
I'm 6'2.5" and gaining, back up to the 175 that I'd been since high school.
I'd lost 55 pounds the fun way: got sick and went into hospital and nearly checked out.

I see profiles where they've got, "curvy" and it looks like they've taken a bit of liberty with the nomenclature. "A few extra pounds" sends this boy a-runnin. Too many are usually sporting multi-chins and their biceps are the same size as my thighs.
Muscle takes up less space than the same weight of fat, so it's different for everyone's weight/height/bone structure. I know overweight (to me) when I see it, and I know I don't wanna see it neckid.
 techgirl27
Joined: 9/5/2005
Msg: 180
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what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 10/29/2009 11:19:58 PM
Exciting1: "well, most of the men i know are in the southeast, and i totally am trying to make a move north. the social environment is a big factor. the guys that i've had the most success with have been from the north."

I agree 100%. Replace "southeast" with "Texas" (or at least include it in the statement) and that's my experience. I am SOOOO moving back [north]east, where college educations and fitness are the standard.

But lets not confuse being overweight with "failure". Look at Laura Bush..... I dont hear too many people criticizing her appearance.
 Genuine_Gentleman_For_You
Joined: 4/22/2009
Msg: 184
what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 11/1/2009 6:48:04 PM
All I know is that my preference is for someone that does not weigh more than me, and I'm 5'10" and about 175 lbs.
 TheReason_
Joined: 5/16/2009
Msg: 185
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what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 11/1/2009 8:11:04 PM

I've seen her in person, she is curvy in my opinion. Each person has their own definition. Remember, I come from a culture where a b-cup and a butt of any sort is considered voluptuous.


That's the culture in Kansas???


:facepalm:
 TheReason_
Joined: 5/16/2009
Msg: 187
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what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 11/2/2009 1:26:44 PM

I wish! But I've only been here 9 months. I was actually referring to Korea, my heritage.


Ahhhhh ok


 christ on a crutch
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 191
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what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 11/4/2009 1:09:31 PM

I have been losing slowly and consistantly for about 1 1/2 yrs, with 30 lbs to go. It seems even that much is a huge problem for most men. Why?

because they prefer a more slender look. everyone gets to have preferences, including you.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 192
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what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 11/4/2009 1:58:02 PM
This is an incredibly difficult thing to define, as it will differ based on each person's preferences. So much depends on fitness level, frame and how the weight (fat and muscle) are distributed. There are plenty of exceptions to almost any generalization you can make!

That said, I have my baseline preference - from which some variation can exist and still be attractive to me. I find a woman who is 5' 7" tall and 125 lbs to be close to ideal. Add or subtract 5 lbs per inch, and allow a +/- 10 lb variance from that figure - works for me and my preferences, but may not for anyone else. Generally, if you calculate BMI from these numbers, they tend to fall in the lower half of the normal BMI range (19-22).
 JennyDD80
Joined: 2/19/2009
Msg: 194
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what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 11/5/2009 11:11:19 AM
I live in Fort Lauderdale, FL. That should say enough right there! The men down here are ALL looking for the barbie doll type no matter what her personality is, I just don't get it. Now, I think that I'm a very attractive woman, but I tell I won't even get a second look from most men down here, I DON'T GET IT!!!

I consider myself Average weight, I've lost 30 lbs in the past year and only have 15 left! YAY! But, I have a great personality, good looking and still am only hit on by complete, alcoholic losers in south florida.

I do feel that the area you live in attributes to how people generalize weight/ looks!

Maybe I should just move! LOL
 TheReason_
Joined: 5/16/2009
Msg: 195
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what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 11/5/2009 8:23:45 PM

I live in Fort Lauderdale, FL. That should say enough right there! The men down here are ALL looking for the barbie doll type no matter what her personality is, I just don't get it. Now, I think that I'm a very attractive woman, but I tell I won't even get a second look from most men down here, I DON'T GET IT!!!

I consider myself Average weight, I've lost 30 lbs in the past year and only have 15 left! YAY! But, I have a great personality, good looking and still am only hit on by complete, alcoholic losers in south florida.

I do feel that the area you live in attributes to how people generalize weight/ looks!

Maybe I should just move! LOL


I'm thinking that you should move. Because you look amazing, perfect the way you are!!!
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 198
what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 11/7/2009 5:52:25 PM
Seems to me if you have to sit up and catch your breath in between tying each shoe,
you're overweight.

or have Congestive Heart Failure. . . .

 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 201
what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 11/11/2009 8:55:59 AM
Probably what they consider overweight (for me) is at least 20 pounds more than I consider overweight.

At my height and frame my normal healthy weight window is 128-133 lbs according to general health specs. 133 to 138 inclding muscle weight. For me seeing 135 or more is cause for concern.

I figure as long as my standards are higher than most guys on my body, there's nothing to worry about. I doubt I'd worry anyway though as I tend to be more worried about what I like than what anyone else thinks.

Bottom line is where you are happy with yourself.
 Nightfall301
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 207
what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 12/7/2009 9:23:52 PM
For me, the definition of overweight encompasses more than what the scale says. As with so many other physical attributes, weight is over-generalized.
Very rarely do I see weight charts take into account bone mass and muscle mass. Even worse are the bloodwork numbers our medical community is working from. I swear they must have gotten them from a temple of tea-drinking monks in Tibet.
Overweight to me is largely an issue of laziness.
If you're soggier in the midsection than you think you should be, and you make more than one pass down an aisle in a parking lot; in order to find a closer space, so you won't have to walk so far - You might be overweight. (Or you might have made a poor choice in your footwear.)
If you've ever considered using the electric cart at Wal-Mart, because you just don't like walking - You might be overweight. (This is a major example, to my mind, as I saw it happen numerous times - the most memorable of which left a one-legged World War 2 veteran sitting on a wooden bench, waiting for one of the lazy slobs to free up a cart.)
If you "Super Size" based solely on price, not because of hunger; or if you're unable to bring yourself to order separate items, when you don't need everything that comes in the "value meal" - You're probably well on your way to overweight.
If you drive to your mailbox, and it's less than 500ft from where you live - AND you leave your car running, with the door unlocked; so you don't have to go to all the effort of turning the key to start the engine again - It's probably too late for you, AND your vehicle could be stolen in about 2 seconds flat.
Convenience is fine, and all - but at some point, inconveniencing yourself in the name of health might not be such a bad thing.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 210
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what do men consider overweight?
Posted: 12/8/2009 12:58:54 PM
Bottom line for me is this: when I see you naked, would I say "Ooh!" or "Eww!"? And if I suspect my reaction would be the latter, we'll probably never get to that point anyway!

And yes, while BMI isn't perfect, it's a good starting point. We all have our preferences and ideas of what's acceptable, so details will vary by individual. I also have a preference or "sweet spot" that's 5' 7" and 125 to 130 pounds. Scale weight up or down with height, at about 5 pounds per inch. Can I look beyond this? Absolutely! It's a preference, not a requirement.
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