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 Ceridwen
Joined: 5/2/2009
Msg: 7
Question for the ladies - need perspectivePage 2 of 2    (1, 2)
Pretty much what everyone else said (especially the first two responses) but also, on the first date, being asked so many serious and direct questions (i.e. "Do you like me? Do you think I'm attractive? Do you see us dating from here on out?") that I never have a moment to calm down and actually enjoy the experience. Asking such questions tends to put a girl on the spot, which in turn makes her uncomfortable, souring the experience.
Of course, I also never forgot one first date I went on with a guy (who lied about his height, incidentally--5'6"? Try 4'8"!) whose every third comment was something perverted and/or sexually oriented. Talk about awkward!
 Ottawa_Chicklet
Joined: 8/5/2006
Msg: 10
view profile
History
Question for the ladies - need perspective
Posted: 5/30/2009 5:23:55 AM
Manners and respect are all you need to know. Be on time, and take the effort to look nice and presentable. Treat her like she is the most important thing to you from the moment you meet, to the moment you depart.
 pillarofsteel
Joined: 5/26/2009
Msg: 11
Question for the ladies - need perspective
Posted: 5/31/2009 12:42:04 AM
LMAO!!! THAT WAS FRICKIN HILARIOUS FROM BEGINING TO END! Oh you have to turn this into a youtube rant, it's just to good not to share with the world . How ginormous your pecker is lol, if you dont have a life fake it, pick up the sport of knitting lol. Instant classic.
 GoddessSupreme
Joined: 5/22/2009
Msg: 12
Question for the ladies - need perspective
Posted: 5/31/2009 2:19:36 AM
I had a blind date who went on and on about how horrible his bosses were and how badly they treated him. This was on the first date (you know there would be no second date after that sickening rant). In response to one of the posters, are men here for a real relationship or does it seem like they are just out there or anywhere to catch, not fish, but puss y? I mean, there are far more important things in life, fellas. GROW THE F UP. Change the world, cure diseases, revolutionize the communication process. Life has got to be more meaningful for you than just "getting laid." What a waste of time and energy. And before any low life chimes in on this one, I am not a prude nor a cold fish. I just find that men are on a different intimacy time line than women. You have no idea how many men shared their cam with me only to discover that they were going to share more with me than their pretty face. LOL
 Ottawa_Chicklet
Joined: 8/5/2006
Msg: 13
view profile
History
Question for the ladies - need perspective
Posted: 5/31/2009 7:47:16 AM

I just find that men are on a different intimacy time line than women.


Golly-gee, you just figuring this out? They wanna bang even me right off the bat!!!
 sos_teach
Joined: 7/22/2008
Msg: 17
view profile
History
Question for the ladies - need perspective
Posted: 5/31/2009 8:58:37 AM
1. Don't talk about sex on a first date or email
2. Be on time
3. Look like your picture ( we do notice if you weigh 100 more pounds then you did on your ten year old pic)
4. Don't change plans at the last minute (meeting for steak and switching to pizza)
5. Don't get drunk
6. Pay the check
7. Tip well (stingy to the wait staff isn't good)
8. Don't put down other women who have been in your life
9. Don't email for months before asking someone out...doesn't show interest
 R2000
Joined: 10/17/2008
Msg: 19
view profile
History
Question for the ladies - need perspective
Posted: 5/31/2009 3:02:25 PM
As I've spent a little time here on POF reading about the outrageous behavior of both men and women, all that I can muster up in reply is Wow!! The thing that I find most surreal is that these aren't hypothetical problems. For the most part, each person is relating personal experience.
 RLC89
Joined: 5/18/2009
Msg: 20
Question for the ladies - need perspective
Posted: 5/31/2009 4:09:24 PM
Oh my. I'm going to list some of the experiences that I've had with guys from POF here:

1. First messages that say something like:
>>"how u doin"
>>"u seem lyke a prity down azz chik. wanna kikk it sumtime???"
>>"cool profile"
>>"so do u text message?"
...None of these will be getting a response from me.

2. Decent first messages, and then a bunch of BS afterward:
>>"Hey, I just read your profile. I really like everything in it, and I'd love to get to know you better. What kind of music are you into? What kind of movies do you watch?"
.....Okay, I'll reply back with a "Thank you" and answering the music/movies questions. I'll ask them similar questions in return.
.....They'll read it, and I wont hear from them for a few days, despite the fact that they have logged on.
.....A few days pass, and they'll finally reply to the message I sent them in return, with something like:
>>"Haven't talked to you in a while, how's it going?"
...You will NOT be getting another reply from me. It took you three days to reply, and you didn't even answer my questions. What the heck?

3. Making yourself seem like you have a life, and are content with your life, and then after other forms of communication (Yahoo, AIM, Email, Phone #) have been exchanged, it's obvious you don't:
.....EX: A guy said he was really happy living life to the fullest, being outdoors all the time, being on the go, waiting for that special someone to come along. He seemed genuine and sincere. Very nice. So we exchanged our names for AIM to talk a bit more on there. After a while of talking, he stated to me, "If I can't find the one I'm supposed to be with very soon, I'm going to kill myself. I need something to live for in this life" < Okay, now that is NOT attractive. Especially when you're only 22.

4. Not taking the chance to get to KNOW each other a little bit before asking if you can have my number, or take me on a date:
.....EX: A guy sent me a message on here, saying, "Well I'm definitely not looking to just get into your pants, I think you're a great girl and I would love to take you to dinner sometime."
I reply with, "Well, I prefer getting to know someone first, before even attempting meeting them"
His response, "Okay, well...my favorite color is blue, I like sushi, I drive a ____ car, I have two dogs. So do you have dogs? Whats your favorite color? And do you think we can meet this Saturday?"
...No more response from me, buddy.

5. Setting a date, and then changing it. And then a second time around, same thing:
.....I talked to a guy on here for a bit, and he seemed cool. So he asked if I wanted to grab dinner with him one night, and I said sure. He sent me a text the day of saying that he had to go into work. Fine, I understand that these things can happen with work. So he arranged a different day, later in the week, and I agreed. The day comes, and he cancels on me again, and arranges another day. No way. Two times is enough, bud.

6. Getting my number, and then blowing up my phone with text messages right after you get it. I don't think I have to explain this one any further.

Need I add more? Because I'm sure I have a few more.
 michele07
Joined: 1/31/2009
Msg: 23
view profile
History
Question for the ladies - need perspective
Posted: 5/31/2009 6:54:25 PM
Okay here goes... If you feel you have to talk about how good looking you are, you probably aren't. If you have the need to brag about your cars, trucks, boats, motorcycles, and all other belongings, including your very 'personal property', so what? If you put down your ex, what will you say about me if things don't work out? If you keep me interested but waiting for weeks or months to set up a date, and then cancel, don't count on getting a second chance. If you don't respond to messages for days at a time, I will eventually stop writing to you. If you do respond, but not to any questions/ comments, I will think you really don't care about getting to know each other and haven't read my message. If you insist on telling me about your platonic lady friend who does everything for you except have sex, I will wonder what is wrong with both of you.
BUT... If you have a nice, recent picture, your profile is interesting, and you show an interest in emailing for a bit, you will more likely catch and keep my interest, get my phone number, and a date. If you show up looking and smelling nice , can make me laugh, can hold up your end of the conversation, and we have easy communication, you will probably get a kiss. And if the kiss is wonderful, you will definately hear from me again-soon!
I think I am speaking for more women than just myself... of course there might be women out there who like lying, boring , unkept, disinterested, uncaring men- who talk about their lady friends when you are trying to talk about making a date... you think?
 english lass
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 24
Question for the ladies - need perspective
Posted: 5/31/2009 7:11:31 PM
bringing along an axe...

that's soooo last season
 smilingindenver
Joined: 1/4/2009
Msg: 25
Question for the ladies - need perspective
Posted: 5/31/2009 8:01:34 PM
Don't order before I arrive. Always pick up the check.
 forum101
Joined: 2/5/2008
Msg: 33
view profile
History
Question for the ladies - need perspective
Posted: 6/2/2009 9:23:41 AM
anything with sexual overtones
criticizing my thoughts, feelings
a** kissing
begging, needy demeanor, bragging on himself
catching him in a lie
not being able to communicate, or just really short lines.
admitting to a criminal past
letting a week go by with no contact. Says he really isnt interested.
over board with the romance stuff---we are, after all, strangers.
very secretive behavior, avoiding answering pertinent questions. Ex: married, STD?

But, of course, they could be lying about anything and everything from the get go.
 keeper515
Joined: 11/26/2006
Msg: 34
view profile
History
Question for the ladies - need perspective
Posted: 6/2/2009 11:15:05 AM
I went out with a self defined ‘sensitive guy’ .
It took me carefully reading several e-mails and listening to what he was saying about an ex-wife and girlfriend who ran screaming into the sunset, to realize that this meant he was sensitive to his own feelings and no one else’s feelings and opinions were important.
I am now allergic to sensitive guys.
 GoddessSupreme
Joined: 5/22/2009
Msg: 40
Question for the ladies - need perspective
Posted: 6/16/2009 1:23:43 AM
How can I share a youtube video of myself on POF so I can show that I am for real? There have been so many complaints about the person who looks hot in her picture not looking hot in real life. I wanted to share my youtube link but the rules prohibit that. There are too many rules on this site. Imeem, the only site allowed on POF, allowed us to share our video files for a while but looks like that got discontinued last month. Very frustrating. I wish the site admins could give us suggestions on how to share our own personal videos. They have this feature on the Tagged website, where POF advertises, so why not here?? This would be an excellent idea for POF, members being allowed to share personal videos of themselves, in addition to their pictures. The vids wouldn't even take up any of POF's bandwidth, if that is a concern, because the videos can be linked from youtube or another file sharing site.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 42
Question for the ladies - need perspective
Posted: 6/16/2009 7:00:18 AM

bringing along an axe...


Ohh, da mn, there goes all my strategies. How about bringing my AK-47? I promise I will not shot the other tables.

 RushLuv
Joined: 4/16/2009
Msg: 45
Question for the ladies - need perspective
Posted: 6/16/2009 9:21:42 AM
Don't touch me, unless I want you to.
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