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 bucsgirl
Joined: 3/2/2005
Msg: 37
So really what are men looking for?Page 3 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
ruby You so have it going on, you know what it's about!! I miss that thread what makes a man sexy, we had some fun there, didn't we?? Maybe need to pull it back up out of the mothballs...that was one of the best and most fun I've seen..
 Montreal_Guy
Joined: 3/8/2004
Msg: 39
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So really what are men looking for?
Posted: 8/9/2005 5:58:14 PM
Depends on the definition of strong too.

If a woman wants to be in charge, that's too strong. ( It should be an equal partnership, with neither having control all the time - although it might fluctuate slightly. Consider it a parliment of the heart.)

A woman that has strong opinions is great, as long as she is not telling you that you are completely wrong when you disagree. That doesn't mean you back down, either. You can ( like we occasionally wind up doing here) disagree with respect.

As long as it's not someone trying to dominate another.
 uniqueman46
Joined: 8/24/2005
Msg: 43
So really what are men looking for?
Posted: 8/27/2005 7:37:54 AM
This isn't such a hard question. Men are just people, like everyone else. I'll grant you this however; Most men have spent far too much time measuring their "manhood" against other men, and far too little time appreciating life itself. As a gender, we are our own worst enemy. I see it in these posts, even here. The bullsh** is really FLOWING. But to answer the question, this man, for example would simply like to be able to be in the same place with a woman who's at the very least, not wasting time trying to prove she's the flavor of the week from the current description of what the modern culture says a real woman represents. It's sad to see the waste of precious time. STOP listening to advertisers to tell you who you should be!!!! Enough about that.

In the end, we're all just looking to love and be loved.

But, love is, among other things, "extending one's self for the growth of another", so the whole search about what either sex is looking for is off target and mute, unless you can find 2 people who are willing to lay down their egos a little and care for each other. That's the kind of a person worth seeking out.

And as for dating and beginning relationships, ladies, be the woman you'll be 5 years from now. Don't be something to catch a man, and then change when you can't maintain it anymore. You'll be far better off just being yourself right from the start. I'm on my way out of a marriage because the woman I loved had "catching somebody before the clock ran out" as her goal, rather than being true to herself, and we both ended up needlessly wasting a lot of time. Happy fishing to you all.
 Paradoxx
Joined: 7/2/2005
Msg: 47
So really what are men looking for?
Posted: 8/28/2005 6:41:49 PM

But, love is, among other things, "extending one's self for the growth of another", so the whole search about what either sex is looking for is off target and mute, unless you can find 2 people who are willing to lay down their egos a little and care for each other. That's the kind of a person worth seeking out.



That is beautiful, well said.
 Paradoxx
Joined: 7/2/2005
Msg: 49
So really what are men looking for?
Posted: 8/28/2005 7:08:26 PM
I think men can handle a woman with a keen mind and opinions...but sometimes I think women take it too far and become almost demeaning to men.

Some women are in a fighter's stance looking to get an arm wrestle in to prove their strength. Why does strength need to be in male form to be equal? "Can you handle me...I dare you, (you weak kneed little man)"

Why in the heck does a man need to prove himself, or his capability to date a woman who has issues about her own strength. Where does that leave a man to go?

Does he buckle down into a "yes dear" pattern?
Do you want him to wear a skirt to prove he will take the back seat?

I think the whole strong woman thing is a good indicator of a woman who feels powerless, and is working through self esteem issues...trying on her butt kicking boots for the first time.
Yapping about strength...probably has been in a relationship with a man who put her down alot. I think the strong women are the ones with nothing to prove to anyone, they just live their lives.

If a man walked up and said to a woman "I dont think you can handle me little girl" well...the woman would squawk "sexist pig!"...so why is it okay for women to stick a battery on her shoulder and say "K, now knock it off tough guy".

Get this...men and women shouldnt play power games and bullcrap gender moves. If you are strong, BE strong...don't be a bully about it.

Face it, straight men dont want to date manly women.
 mcbobly
Joined: 8/28/2005
Msg: 51
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So really what are men looking for?
Posted: 9/10/2005 11:18:36 PM
I must agree with vince, we just want somebody that wants to share in our interests and lives as well as letting us share in their lives and interests. In all actuality for most of us there is not a lot of requirements. Just a honset, caring down to earth woman.
 kitchensink
Joined: 9/10/2005
Msg: 52
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So really what are men looking for?
Posted: 9/14/2005 6:31:45 PM
Some men like strong-willed women, some like passive women, some like a mix.
Personally I like a woman who is intelligent, independent, great sense of humor, honest and faithful with a zest for life. To each, their own.
 Se7en9
Joined: 6/27/2005
Msg: 53
So really what are men looking for?
Posted: 9/14/2005 10:48:54 PM
right now .. some pepto.. damn spicy ... that indian food can be..
 JWA
Joined: 5/21/2005
Msg: 54
So really what are men looking for?
Posted: 9/15/2005 3:38:19 AM
So many of this kind of post contain a comment to the effect that men can't handle women who are "strong minded" , that men are intimidated by such women. Self-described "powerful" women might be overlooking something----the men in question just aren't into YOU?!?! It could very well be something OTHER than your "power" is the turn-off to them?

So many PEOPLE adopt behavior that they want to believe is strong, powerful, self-actualized, self assured, confident, and knowledgable BUT it really isn't seen by others that way. As an example I've heard the term "blantantly/brutally honest" but every woman I've talked with who describes themselves that way are really just mean spirited and wanting to just spew some very hard feelings they keep bottled up. How could be THAT (or something similar) be viewed as a positive personality trait? Our perceptions of ourselves is not always how others see us---this single aspect could be much, much more a factor.

I've also discovered those who are truly strong in any way usually don't have to go about telling others---it's shown by their actions. Strength is quiet and needs no advertising! When I see profiles going on and on about how "they" have it I really wonder why it's necessary to say it if it's true? Men, like all PEOPLE, want someone who's not difficult to deal with, someone who doesn't go into something with bad feelings from passed relationships, someone who's at least open to what might be. We also like women that don't load their profiles with dribble about how they DEMAND to be treated when their own ability and true desire to reciprocate could be suspect.

But I'm scared of "strong willed" women so this all could be just fear talking...................


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