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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profi      Home login  
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 Sapphireeyes
Joined: 1/13/2008
Msg: 51
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?Page 3 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
Wow I just cant believe the responses to this question...the OP did ask a legitimate question and some of yall slaughtered him.

but in some ways I think you prove his point...is the anger you direct at him or is it to any man who you feel acts like he does or is it just anger at men in general...now if you were a guy and came across your post in this thread...would you want to meet the you?

Imagine a man who stumbles across your profile and notices the comments you have posted on this thread...I am sure most men would in fact not care how justified you feel you are...they would simply click next. No matter how justified you feel your comments about the op are...is there really any reason to attack a man you have never met face to face? He is at most just an online personality...he only has credibility if you decide to give it to him, 99.9 percent of his post I dont read cause I realized a long time ago his comments were worthless to me.

Remember this might not even be a man...it could be a female who is just killing time posting as a guy to get a bunch of women all stirred up. So now some of you have made yourself look like an unreasonable woman who has a ton of baggage...well played OP!
 desert wildflower
Joined: 6/4/2008
Msg: 52
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/6/2009 3:39:49 PM
I`m not here to find a man so I don`t care what anyone thinks. I`m here for creative writing purposes. This for me has nothing to do with reality, just light entertainment to break up monotony.

If I want to meet someone it isn`t going to be here. I`ll be out on the Ice flow,eniticing burly guys with my moose a tater chili in a big thermos. Just to clarify the situation
 OldFolkie
Joined: 6/8/2008
Msg: 53
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What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/6/2009 3:44:20 PM
Peachy, at the risk of being both repetitive and possibly redundant, your impression about 99.5% of men over 45 is just wrong. Even a casual look at the male posters in this forum show that a majority (I didn't do the math so I can't give you a percentage, but well over half) are NOT looking to date younger women and explicitly and repeatedly say so.

Personally I think this perception falls into the category of urban myth. I can only think of two or three men who frequently post in this forum that boast of hunting younger women. It sometimes seems to me that knowing that SOME older men prefer younger women gets translated somehow into MOST or ALL, and it just ain't so.
 blondegirl24
Joined: 8/14/2008
Msg: 54
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/6/2009 3:50:09 PM
I read this guy's profile yesterday and couldn't believe it..too funny.

"I am a real catch. Really!! I am warm and romantic. Love to laugh and kid around with that special someone. Love to do out of the way things. Love to stay home with the chiminea burning with some soft music and a good bottle of wine. Love getting in the kitchen with someone special and cooking up a storm.. I love to cook....I am responsible, sensible and emotionally stable. Believe in love and trust and monogamy. Can dress up or down but usually come across as sexy no matter what the attire."

Seriously, who would write this and expect to meet someone? Talk about full of yourself...who could ever be wonderful enough for him? He was only 49 so maybe by the time he turns 50 he will ask what women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile.

Bicoastal 49 can you maybe have a chat with this guy???
 ds444
Joined: 9/17/2007
Msg: 55
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What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/6/2009 4:20:05 PM

I do have to comment, in Mr. Gaddflye`s defense, that I feel he is only a lost sheep following blindly the accepted attitude of older single males in upscale Southern California communities.
{long invective deleted}


Wildflower - perhaps you should thing about moving.
 FriendlyFreeSpirit
Joined: 8/24/2008
Msg: 56
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/6/2009 9:44:47 PM
Perhaps the men who think we're being too unfeminine might share our opinions if Gaddflye was a female.
How would you like to be told by a 66-year-old woman that you are too old for her? And it's not just too old - that, because you are 50-plus, you must be impotent , demanding, financially desperate, lazy and fat, have saggy gonads hanging down to your knees, a huge belly, floppy man boobs, wrinkled skin, be unreasonable and probably demented?
That's the message Gaddflye has been sending to women over 50 who post here - relentlessly. And if we object, then he tells us it's because we don't like the truth - his truth. That 30-year-old women beg him to bonk them and think he's really hot. And women over 50 are so furious at not getting a go at his goods, we're consumed with jealousy.
Unfortunately, one change that usually does occur in women over 50 is they don't suffer fools gladly. Tough, huh?
 ohdriver
Joined: 3/22/2009
Msg: 57
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/6/2009 10:27:13 PM
because you are 50-plus, you must be impotent , demanding, financially desperate, lazy and fat, have saggy gonads hanging down to your knees, a huge belly, floppy man boobs, wrinkled skin, be unreasonable and probably demented?

OMG! Did I forget to close the curtains again?

I don't know if this is the time and place to interject, but statistics show that most men who marry after the age of fifty do so to a woman whose age is within five years of their own.
 FriendlyFreeSpirit
Joined: 8/24/2008
Msg: 58
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/6/2009 10:45:37 PM
But how many 50-plus men marry, ohdriver?
Yes, of course they do. Most men aren't Gaddflye, thank goodness. But I don't live in Desert's world. I would find it very depressing to be thought of as invisible just because I'm 53. I know it's old. But what can I do??
 strawberi50
Joined: 6/18/2008
Msg: 59
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/6/2009 10:48:12 PM
EEEEEE....GAD's !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Well I just had to visit your profile and read your self analyzation. My. the first four letters in that big word pretty well describes it and I don't even have a PHD....Do tell! I am none of the things that you desire and that is a good thing. Being over 50 works for me but I think I would have a problem if I was past 65 . Don't think I would put my picture up. Living in Neverland with the lost boys would probably be more appealing, don't cha think!
 IntriguedByThis
Joined: 11/20/2008
Msg: 60
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/7/2009 2:21:50 AM
Well, probably not what I would've intended as my first post to these forums, particularly since it will tie back into my profile out of context, but the following seemed to merit a reply:


How would you like to be told by a 66-year-old woman that you are too old for her? And it's not just too old - that, because you are 50-plus, you must be impotent , demanding, financially desperate, lazy and fat, have saggy gonads hanging down to your knees, a huge belly, floppy man boobs, wrinkled skin, be unreasonable and probably demented?


I've been reading the forums for awhile now. While your message is well-founded, I'd like to point out that the gist of what you state seems to occur often enough to men here in discussion threads. Specifically, I'm 50, never married. One of the threads here effectively stated that I must, by definition, be either emotionally defective, unable to commit, or broken in some other fashion. There was even a thread asking if being never-married, over-30 (!) was a problem. I'm definitely doomed...

Another thread lambasted anyone who had the temerity to list a preferred age-range for dating. I had one of those on my profile at one point, since-removed given the invective it seems to incite. That range, which included ages both older and younger than mine, was simply expedient, based on my looking around at people I know and thinking about who among them I would consider dating based on their personalities, where they are in their lives, "who" they are as a person, and yes, looks.

The people that set both ends of that range are exceptional, the long tail of the curve, but the fact that I would even consider dating someone, say 30, would automatically make me a perv in many of these posters' opinions. I'm not looking for someone in that range, but I'm not excluding them either. Does that mean that it would work? Who knows? That's why it's "dating". When I was 25, I was dating a woman who was 37. It didn't work out, and age and the related expectations were a factor there, but I was interested in the person, not the calendar. She is still a friend to this day. I'd actually prefer someone around my age - it gets annoying having to explain who the bands that you listen to are, and that yes, they really were on the charts at one point

(old joke - from incredulous youngster: "Did you know that Paul McCartney was in a band before Wings?")
(today's variant: "Who is Paul McCartney?")

In this very thread, a poster states that "all" men think that this is nothing more than a booty-hunting site. I guess I'm out of place then.

A number of women have stated that pictures with a group of friends (particularly with other women in them) is a no-no, yet, a large percentage of women's profiles that I've looked at are exactly that: combinations of friends and/or apparent dates (a male and female, both dressed up, obviously at some event/bar). In a few cases, the "group" shot was the only picture, leaving us to guess as to which person of the group the profile is about.

Conversely, another poster implies that if someone (else) didn't take your picture, you must not have friends. I'd posit that this is a gender difference: men don't generally ask other men to take their picture. I have a tripod and I know how to use it...

re: financially desperate - although it's not a category here, on other sites, I must admit I am given pause when I see someone's profile list a requirement that their potential suitors must earn three or more times their own income. I don't care what you do for a living, whether you are a starving artist or a renowned brain surgeon. I admire skill and effort. If we are a couple and I pay most of the time, that's fine. On the other hand, if you can and want to buy me a Ferrari, I'll manage to choke back the humiliation .

Having said all of the above, feel free to view/review/rebuke my profile. It contains many of the various cliches including fireplaces, dogs, rainy Sundays, and back rubs, but only because I like those things, not because I think that they will play well for the intended audience.
 CompletelyDone
Joined: 8/12/2007
Msg: 61
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/7/2009 2:44:35 AM

Having said all of the above, feel free to view/review/rebuke my profile. It contains many of the various cliches including fireplaces, dogs, rainy Sundays, and back rubs, but only because I like those things, not because I think that they will play well for the intended audience.


Thank you for the invite... I did in fact take a few moments with your profile and came away thinking it was one of the best I'd read in a lonnnngggggg time. Cudos to you for your ability to "draw pictures" in the reader's mind with your words and for actually, being able to describe your life in such a way that a person can sense who you are.

THAT'S what many of us would love to see in a man's profile...

 FriendlyFreeSpirit
Joined: 8/24/2008
Msg: 62
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/7/2009 2:53:14 AM

When I was 25, I was dating a woman who was 37. It didn't work out, and age and the related expectations were a factor there, but I was interested in the person, not the calendar. She is still a friend to this day. I'd actually prefer someone around my age - it gets annoying having to explain who the bands that you listen to are, and that yes, they really were on the charts at one point

Off topic, but this reminds me of an article I read recently where Martin Short said he was working on a new tv show. It was about a 50-something man and the women in his life, ranging from an 80-year-old (who he'd had an Ashton Kudger/Demi Moore type of relationship) to a 23-year-old..lol..
 Call me Ginny
Joined: 12/28/2008
Msg: 63
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/7/2009 3:24:03 AM
I enjoyed your profile, too.


Having said all of the above, feel free to view/review/rebuke my profile. It contains many of the various cliches including fireplaces, dogs, rainy Sundays, and back rubs, but only because I like those things, not because I think that they will play well for the intended audience.


A couple of suggestions .....not criticisms, observations;

Put more spaces in your thoughts. Treat them as you would paragraphs. It will be easier to read. I don't know if there are restricrions as to length, but yours in now where near as long as some I have seen.

Remember that you latest forum posts are shown in your profile. Be careful that the first few sentences as well as the subject titles reflect well on you.

The correlation I would draw is a resume, which in some ways is what a profile iis. A synopsis of your interests and what you think will interest.

I, as both an interviewer and as an applicant am very aware of the truth that a resume has to catch the readers attention in 30 seconds. If not, it's "round filed." (Rejected, or in POF terms....shrug, move on...)

Take out the negatives: If you don't..... etc, etc. You can convey that you do like something without putting it in a negative way. If a woman isn't interested in what you are, she'll move on.

JMHO

Good luck, fishie. Life is good!

 IntriguedByThis
Joined: 11/20/2008
Msg: 64
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/7/2009 4:08:58 AM

Remember that you latest forum posts are shown in your profile. Be careful that the first few sentences as well as the subject titles reflect well on you.

Yeah, this one still bothers me. People who are unfamiliar with the Forums feature of POF see these snapshot quotes, taken out of the context of the whole thread. Given some of the subject matter that is bandied about, that can be a bit problematic. This is my least favorite feature of POF. I think that there should be an option to disable it, much the way that one can disable other features such as "viewed by" entries.

I appreciate your suggestions, particularly with respect to the positive .vs negative slant. I changed some of that. I've added spacing too. I transferred my profile content from one of those "other" sites, and it did have character limits, thus the compressed formatting.

I also squared-up my thumbnails with the Edit feature. I'm taller now
 TryAgan
Joined: 4/4/2008
Msg: 65
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What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/7/2009 4:11:22 AM
MissingMinx - Msg 85


have a good read through some of Gaddflye's posts across the forum

The original question/post was very clearly formulated, and according to the POF and general fora rules, it should be treated on its own. It’s unfortunate, that few jaded, frustrated, and mean-spirited female posters instead of contributing some useful information used the opportunity to viscously attack the author because of some totally unrelated posts he made in the past.
 TryAgan
Joined: 4/4/2008
Msg: 66
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What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/7/2009 4:42:20 AM
Ismene2 - Msg 88
It is interesting piece of information, (although repeating it 3 times pollutes unnecessarily this tread), but what does that have to do with OP?

Please, look carefully at the title of this thread - translated into Viennese - "Was Frauen über 50 Jahre alt finden wünschenswert in einem Man Profil")

As I read it, the OP did not request a review of his profile, it was posted as a question of general interest, which if properly and sincerely addressed, should be of benefit and interest to both male and female members of POF.
 Call me Ginny
Joined: 12/28/2008
Msg: 67
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/7/2009 5:20:21 AM
Much more "Intguing" LOL.

 RockDrummer_2010
Joined: 4/29/2009
Msg: 68
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/7/2009 8:19:03 AM
Sheesh, I've already asked twice for a review on this thread...nothing - But a new guy comes on asking & 3 gals jump on it....I feel so invisible.

On another note:
Unlike the Fly - I actually prefer an 'ol gal with a 'lil saggy boobs and a pooch, I feel like such a hero when I push them babies back up to sea-level (I'll get yours up - If you'll get mine up...lol). Hey, throw in a little history of alcohol & drug abuse...she just got hotter than a two-dollar pistol
 Call me Ginny
Joined: 12/28/2008
Msg: 69
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/7/2009 11:14:21 AM
[qoute] And you can't figure this out?

............I've already asked twice for a review on this thread...nothing - But a new guy comes on asking & 3 gals jump on it....I feel so invisible.

ismene2 I did look at his profile.....let's just say I wouldn't know where to start.

Especially after this

Unlike the Fly - I actually prefer an 'ol gal with a 'lil saggy boobs and a pooch, I feel like such a hero when I push them babies back up to sea-level (I'll get yours up - If you'll get mine up...lol). Hey, throw in a little history of alcohol & drug abuse...she just got hotter than a two-dollar pistol


Might have meant it as tongue-in-cheek, but came out more like foot-in-mouth. JMHO



.
 Gaddflye
Joined: 9/10/2008
Msg: 70
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/7/2009 12:50:57 PM
Yesterday I solved my problem! I was down at the beach house hanging out with a 51 year old lady friend who I used to date years ago and who has remained a close friend. She is my "wardrobe consultant" and has really helped me in that regard. We go shopping for clothes together and she has a good eye. Anyway, she had just broken up with her latest boyfriend and was going back to the intrnet dating site she likes and on which she has been quite successful. I told her that I wanted to develop a profile appealing to women in their early fifties. She volunteered to help me, God bless her!

When this lady places her profile in viewable status she gets between 50 and 150 responses a day so she only leaves it up two or three days at a time. She then goes through the mens' profiles and separates the wheat from the chaff. She tells me some of the men have well written profiles which appeal to women in their early fifties and she will give me their screen names so I can look them up. She is going to ask some of her girlfriends who also have been very successful at internet dating to help me out in the same manner so I can learn what works best. Sometimes all one has to do is ask. Problem solved!

My heartfelt thanks and best wishes to all of you have sincerely and thoughtfully responded.
 angelwinz
Joined: 11/27/2006
Msg: 71
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/7/2009 3:44:23 PM
As a number have said, # 1 is Post a Current Picture.
I looked at your profile and IMO I found it lacking in a number of areas. Talking about previous LTR is boring and quickly a turn off. Saying what you are attracted to is ok, but you will turn off a lot of wonderful people that may be close to, but not exactly in that range. What about personalities, as we grow older, those traits become more important.. unless of course you only want that 'trophy' type of person.

Good luck to you and hope you find exactly what you are looking for.
Angel
 Sapphireeyes
Joined: 1/13/2008
Msg: 72
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/7/2009 4:07:43 PM
from missingminx:

Sapphire Eyes - before you tick us off,
I really hope you had a mouse in your pocket or something to say US vs me, or is there really a posse of women like the men complain about
have a good read through some of Gaddflye's posts across the forum - the negative responses you are seeing to Mr. Gaddflye are the result of the many comments he has made, rather than this one question - unfortunately for Mr. Gaddflye he is becoming rather well known.


VALIDATION....when someone responds either positively or negatively to Mr Gaddflye...you validate him....if you ignore him when he makes a comment he will simply go away cause you havent reward him for being a troll.

I dont care if I tick you off or not, you should realize how you sound to someone who sees what you are saying about a man you have never met and have no proof that is infact a man...he is asking a reasonable question and you are responding to that question as a personal attack to him, you are making him your issue..you are buying into his bullshit and making it sound credible....ie the old saying throw an old shoe in a pack of dogs and the one who yelps was probably the one who got hit...that is all he is doing, his one purpose and yet time and time again individuals allow their anger at members of the opposite sex to come shining across. Is his viewpoint really worth the amount of anger you show? He says the things he does to get this reaction, to make you as a person look totally unreasonable and having a group of other similar women bash him then makes it look like a majority of women are the angry, hateful women he is trying to protray us as. In my personal opinion he is probably someone who cant get a date if his life depends on it, he post way to much on the forums to have the active social schedule he claims, so for his rejection he wants the ones rejecting him to feel rejected to...yall validate him.

However, lets say that Mr. Gaddflye is all that and a bag of potato chips too, the one thing most are falling to realize is Mr. Gaddflye is welcome to his viewpoint..that is what this country was about...each individual's pursuit of happiness. While he might prefer the company of an much younger barbie type woman...that woman might prefer his company also so for them it works...it doesnt have to work for you...and only if you buy into his viewpoint that this type of person is superior to you...is it true.
 FriendlyFreeSpirit
Joined: 8/24/2008
Msg: 73
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/7/2009 4:36:58 PM

one thing most are falling to realize is Mr. Gaddflye is welcome to his viewpoint..that is what this country was about...each individual's pursuit of happiness. While he might prefer the company of an much younger barbie type woman...that woman might prefer his company also so for them it works...it doesnt have to work for you...and only if you buy into his viewpoint that this type of person is superior to you...is it true

Sapph, men like Gaddflye can go out with the plastic version of Barbie for all I care. If he were raving about black people or Asians, you would agree with me. His attitudes are sexist to an extreme. And then he wants a profile review from the women he has enjoyed insulting? What a jerk.
 Sapphireeyes
Joined: 1/13/2008
Msg: 74
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/7/2009 5:20:11 PM

Sapph, men like Gaddflye can go out with the plastic version of Barbie for all I care. If he were raving about black people or Asians, you would agree with me. His attitudes are sexist to an extreme. And then he wants a profile review from the women he has enjoyed insulting? What a jerk.


FFS, trust me when I say you are one of the most beautiful women that I have ever seen on this site. Cant imagine any man, including Gaddflye, finding trouble with your appearance.....However, the point you are missing....I DO NOT AGREE WITH ANYTHING HE POST....I JUST REALIZED WHY HE POST THE THINGS HE DOES...

You are 100 percent correct he does enjoy insulting women ...that is exactly why he does it...my question to you ...is why do you validate what he is doing? The ones attacking him are who are giving him credibility ...you are making him have a value to his valueless comments. WHY?

If for one minute you forget how angry he makes you with his sexist comments and you go back and read the comments women have written in response to him...you will see how bitter and anger they sound....now I have some male friends who told me the reason they dont read the forums any longer is cause the women gang up on any man and want to butcher him....they feel this way not based on what someone has said to them...but from reading the way women attack posters like Gaddflye who comments are much to stupid to deserve a response. So as a group the women on the forums are missing out on the valueable comments on REAL MEN who could add so much more meaning and understanding to any thread on the forums.

Gaddflye is at best a forum bully, irl he would never be able to say the comments he does to anyone...no one would respect him or listen to him ...but for some reason people on here not only read his comments but validate them and comment on them and now when he has asked a question that OTHER MEN WANT THE ANSWER TO the women have lost their objectivity and gone overboard in bashing Gaddflye...my question is WHY? Is he really worth the effort? Has any other man ever said they feel the same as him? Has anyone with a posted picture that others have met ever said there was a group of men who think this way? I have had dozens of well to do men from that area who have written to me about how much they wish I lived there and how tired they are of the plastic women and want someone real...
 FriendlyFreeSpirit
Joined: 8/24/2008
Msg: 75
What do women over 50 find desirable and undesirable in a man's profile?
Posted: 6/7/2009 5:39:51 PM

You are 100 percent correct he does enjoy insulting women ...that is exactly why he does it...my question to you ...is why do you validate what he is doing? The ones attacking him are who are giving him credibility

Yep, you're right, Sapph.
He's not worth any thought. You're right: responding validates his words.
Ok, Gaddflye, post away, little man. You're safe from me from now on..

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