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Joined: 4/2/2011
Msg: 425
Justifying Cheating?Page 18 of 24    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24)
ugh.. ive already talked about this somewhat.. cheating is such a vaginal term by the way..

cheating is a guy that leaves his own place.. to find happiness behind your back, so your feelings arent hurt.

cheating is for you..

for guys.. if your not ****in, the dingy **** by the dumpster, or the lawyer,dentist, nurse.. they all got the same thing a guy wants... twat.
secondly...guys dont cheat like women.
when guys cheat, its usually to fill, maintain or create a roster, a stock of employees.. women.. so that if you act up, or dont act right... or leave after or before 90 days... we arent left in the cold.. essentially its a human resources.. and we make sure there is something available to satisfy this undying hunger all men have to fucl something

when women cheat.. its usually angry.. like a f-you to whoever they are with. usually it means the guy didnt do somethig she wanted or expected, and most times, she has no respect for him. there is no aatisfaction besidea what i mentioned when a woman cheats since all you gotta do is open your f-ing legs.

when a guys doing it.. its more like privates and generals.. now a guy doesnt want to **** up his army/ family, but you being the wife/ girlfriend, your a general and dont know it, but you take it like he wants to **** it up.. who dies first in battles? privates mainly... and thats what women get upset about. guys dont care about useless f-s.. its just to satisfy the hunger.. we care about generals.. shes got the keys to my house, feeds my dogs, chats to my mom.. she has information that is valuable.. your worth is moee important than a useless f. yet, you take it as though we should lose it all, while not understanding the hunger, and the creature that man is..

you want to understand what cheatig is. look more closely.. without judging, writing off.. there is a nature involved.

women want one. men want many.. and select one. ...with side orders lol.
Joined: 6/24/2009
Msg: 426
view profile
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 5/29/2012 4:00:54 PM
It's all about money.

The rule : 1 marriage at a time

The problem : When women get divorced THEY GET PAID. Maybe they earned that payout thruoughout the marriage but the perception is CHA-CHING and from a point of view marriage is just a long-term prostitution contract on deferred payment with heavy penalties for termination.

Hence : Men want to stay married (to preserve what they earned) and still have intimacy with a woman.

There is no question that finances are infinitely more important to a man than a woman. Finances are tied to a man's self-esteem just like a woman's beauty are hers. When was the last time you dated a homeless man? Right, never, men need wealth in order to get sex, and they need sex in order to remain emotionally stable.

In a bad marriage, he is denied sex, and in divorce he is denied wealth with which to be able to attract another partner.

A woman without money is no problem, she can get a new relationship in 5 minutes and have a roof over her head. Maybe not a GOOD relationship but something until the right guy comes along. Most women tho are too honest and touchy feely to be that pragmatic about it and instead demand to impoverish the old husband and bleed him dry to have her own condo and "support herself" on child support money and a schitty job as a cashier or something.

This is the reality folks.

Most women don't bring anything valuable to a relationship other than his love for her, if he's lucky she cooks and does laundry and he will get a solid 4 man-hours of productivity out of her per week while he's out earning "their" money. For a guy it's a terrible deal, it's like buying a jumbo jet for the free peanuts.

Women will retort "but I raised your kids" but think about it. Men don't charge when they fix the leaky roof or the car or do plumbing, and once in a while they change a diaper or pack the kids lunch. It's not like you're more useful around the house or doing something that he can't do for himself. You think you're entitled to half his earning because you re-arranged his sock drawer.

If you look at it honestly you can see that men get raped in divorce and they NEED money in order to be a provider and be loved.

Bottom line is no, cheating aint right. But it's understandable and in certain circumstances the only thing a man can really do short of declaring divorce and living in a cardboard box.
Joined: 7/3/2009
Msg: 427
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 5/29/2012 5:36:05 PM
I have a very passionate opinion on this as I have never cheated but both my ex wives cheated. They also thought they were going to take me to the cleaners in the subsequent divorces.

At the time I lived in Georgia and that state allows adultery as a ground, when they filed under the no fault I countered with the adultery grounds.

Now mind you they knew that even with the evidence I had the split would still be 50/50.

Being the gentleman I am I offered to forego the public adultery trial that would air all their transgressions during our marriages.

Seems they were then open to my generous offer of their personal items and their personal bank accounts if I dropped the adultery charges and signed their no fault.

Cheating is despicable and unforgivable the human trash that would do that to their spouse should be handled just as I did mine.

Papa1973 you were just a little on the rough side and didn't sugar coat it at all but you did describe marriage as I know it.

Which is why there will never be another wife cheat on me. Marriage is out dating is in, and with the steady supply of freshly divorced women wanting to try out their new found freedom. Well it is a great time to be a fit single man.
Joined: 6/10/2008
Msg: 428
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 5/30/2012 8:43:44 AM
You are looking to share your life with someone period.
If this person can not meet your needs than, it doesnt matter why, just that you are not getting everything that you need
Joined: 5/27/2012
Msg: 429
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 5/31/2012 6:21:52 AM
Cheating while you are dating is acceptable as long as the guy doesn't propose or make it explicitly clear that you and him are exclusive.

Cheating when married is a different story altogether.

Men are allowed to cheat in a marriage because the woman has already cheated by involving another entity more powerful than her husband to enforce her will of monogamy on him. That thug that the woman uses to force her will on her husband is the State in the form of a one-sides contract call marriage.

Men cheat in marriage because women cheated by creating marriage as a threat to take away half a man's wealth if he doesn't comply with her wishes.
Joined: 10/6/2011
Msg: 430
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 5/31/2012 9:06:14 AM

When any person justifies their actions they know they are going against their own cosncience and going against spiritual values.

A person will justify theri cheating because they know they are doing some thing very unhealthy against another person.

Cheating is a betrayal and two wrongs do not make a right.

If we lie in any way we have no choice but to live in fear of each lie.

If we live a facade we have no choice but to live in fear of being found out we are living a lie.

Cheating in any way is a betayal of trust no matter how you color it up.

Do people cheat because they are adrenline junkies.

Do people think that sexual intermacy is only what a realtionship is based up on.

Do people cheat because they are sexually inadequate and inept.

Do people cheat really think that sex on its own is love.

Cheating of any sort is unhealthy.

Love and peace to everyone

Dave of Beckeham.

Do you like, cut and past these or something? I found one from 2010.......................
Joined: 12/29/2011
Msg: 431
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 6/19/2012 10:35:09 AM

there is no justification.

be man or woman enough to leave the situation. Cheaters are liars and I'm always wondering what they tell their kids when they do something wrong.

If you cheat, you are what you are; a deceitful liar.

A cheater is a cheater. A liar is someone who says they're at work, when they're really at some girls house banging her.

Not all cheaters are liars. A lot of cheaters just go have sex with other people, and there's nothing more to it. They're not lying, they're just not saying that they're doing it.
Joined: 4/11/2009
Msg: 432
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 6/19/2012 5:48:12 PM
This entire 24 page post has been very educational. I was a cheater. I love my wife...I really do. We get along great and I only have one complaint about her and the relationship.....very little sex. It seems such a minor thing, but it builds to be so much more. Perhaps I have a sexual addiction or perhaps I have something wrong with me, but if I go without sex for more than a couple weeks, I lose all focus and am in physical pain. My wife will only have sex with me every few months at best. I suffer through it most of the time, but it greatly affects my home life and work life. I have talked to her about it numerous times and she always agrees that we should have more sex, but it just never happens. I try to initiate sex at least a few times a week and am usually turned down. I masturbate every day and it doesn't help. As many have said, I have made excuses for it that I fully believed in my delirious state. Now, after reading all of these very good posts, I feel that I have been very wrong and that my pain must endure or end forever. I cannot stand the pain and yet cannot commit the crime. Therefore, it must all end. Thank you.
Joined: 2/23/2012
Msg: 433
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 6/19/2012 6:36:11 PM

Not all cheaters are liars.

Yes, they are. A continuing misrepresentation of anything is a "lie". In this case, the misrepresentation is the notion that the individual is faithful.
Joined: 4/4/2012
Msg: 434
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 6/20/2012 12:43:58 AM
the couple needs to talk about it, find something that works! it's never okay to find what you're lacking else where, especially when you're married. marriage isn't meant to be easy; if you have two willing/sacrificial people, you can get through anything.
Joined: 1/8/2011
Msg: 435
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 6/23/2012 6:04:02 PM
The guy chose to marry and have kids with that person so if he doesn't want to get an expensive divorce then he also chooses not to cheat. If he wants sex outside of marriage, then he needs to give up half of everything he owns by getting a divorce.

Sex - give up all your material possessions in a divorce and shop at the dollar store
No sex - keep the family together and all your possessions
Joined: 1/29/2012
Msg: 436
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 6/23/2012 7:27:18 PM
I wasn't cheating. I tripped and fell on his penis. Pretty justifiable excuse.
Joined: 4/6/2012
Msg: 437
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 8/3/2012 8:56:14 AM
There are different reasons for cheating. Sometimes it is just that men need more sex than their wife want. And even talking aboit it. Or trying the woment eitjer just dont want sex or dont for many reasons of their own. I used to just automatically hate that cheat. I wouldnt have one as a boyfriend but i do understand a bit more why noth men & women cheat yet do love their partnets. Jyst in a different wau they thougjt they would when they got married.

I never thought so many ppl nowadays stay together for the children & live as friends. People just change as time goes by. Grow apart. I couldn't understand staying in sexless marriages but there are a lot of younger couples that do. Ini this day & age w ppl divorcing lt & right couples still stay together for the kids but have their own lives. Private lives both men & women. Also women stil use sex to manipulate . And many live w anger towards their husbands & use no sex as punishment. Seems more women do but men also do. Yet they stay married & stay in their nice house in nice neighborhood & the perks of marriage. Just don't really like their husbands. I never understood cheating ad much as I but I still can't see myself living like tha. Thats not what i call a marriage. Tbt
Joined: 5/4/2012
Msg: 438
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 8/3/2012 12:54:36 PM
Half of everything compared to all of everything. They are just lazy and weak.
Joined: 7/28/2012
Msg: 439
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 8/3/2012 5:05:23 PM
what about wives that cheat? My wife said she fell out of love with me filed for divorce and is still married and living with another guy why do women cheat its not all the guys
Joined: 6/26/2012
Msg: 440
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 8/3/2012 5:48:56 PM
there is NO excuse for cheating in a marriage, sorry. all those justifications that people give are usually lies, but even if they were true, it doesnt matter. when you get married, you take a vow to forsake all others. those are the common vows made anyway. if you break those vows because youre not getting laid enough or whatever, what good are you? when i was brought up i remember often hearing the old saying "a man is only as good as his word" i think this is true for man or woman of course. if what you say cant be trusted, youre not much count.

marriage vows should not be taken so lightly. i was married, and i was unhappy, but i didnt cheat. its a choice to do the right thing.
Joined: 3/30/2012
Msg: 441
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 8/3/2012 6:38:06 PM
What you describe is pretty common. Men are not naturally monogamous anyway. After a certain period of time they want other experiences and if the woman in the marriage is no longer interested then they seek outside sex.
A woman stays for the reasons you state and turns a blind eye to any signs of infidelity and it may suit her in many ways. The problems arise when the other party wants more and tries to break up the marriage so my advice would be that both partners be married and have as much to lose as each other. Also the guy may lie and give the impression he will leave his wife when he has no intentions of doing so. It is a risk whatever.

Many men on here are in that boat and some lie about their situation as they know most women wont buy into the casual sex on the side thing.
Joined: 10/12/2010
Msg: 442
view profile
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 8/3/2012 6:54:50 PM
So are you saying it's the woman's fault that there is no intimacy in the marriage? Because that's what it sounded like to me. It takes two so you can't blame it on the woman.
Joined: 9/5/2010
Msg: 443
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 8/4/2012 10:58:55 AM
I can see myself cheating... there is no intimacy in my current relationship but we have talked about him moving out in September or October so I am waiting until then.
 Happy Dude 63
Joined: 5/3/2009
Msg: 444
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 8/4/2012 3:24:29 PM
So the guy is stuck with just a horrible woman that wont sleep with him? He wont leave her because he will be crushed by child support? So he sneaks around out to have sex while being married?

And this is a guy you find attractive?

I say the guy is pathetic. Probably a liar, definitely exaggerating his home life problems. Or at least his reasons for home life issues.

Moral character comes before money and possessions. He needs to separate from his wife and begin a real life. You need to really look past him and at what is happening.
Joined: 7/4/2012
Msg: 445
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 8/5/2012 12:29:57 AM
People do owe each other something, but they owe their selves more! Gotta be happy
Joined: 6/26/2012
Msg: 446
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 8/5/2012 12:42:12 AM
johnnymcDouche: when you get into a relationship youre supposed to at the very least, put the needs of the person youre with on equal terms with your own needs. if youre just out for yourself, i feel bad for women who get involved with you.
Joined: 2/11/2012
Msg: 447
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 8/5/2012 4:35:57 AM
It's cheaper to keep her.
Joined: 6/28/2012
Msg: 448
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 8/5/2012 6:53:43 AM
I'd rather fork out thousands, and be honest I'm no longer in love with my partner.

There is no justifying cheating.

Only justification, is if you had an open relationship, where you were honest about seeing others. In this instance, it wouldn't be cheating anyways, as everything is in the open.

Otherwise, it is lying, and deceptive. And you have the nerve to tell them you love them, and look them in the eyes.

I will never understand someone who cheats and lies to get what they want. Even less, someone who actually wants to grasp at straws to justify their behavior.

I see it as weak. Same type of person who would break up with you via email.

Get an open relationship, or leave.

Type of people who'll cheat out of convenience, would ditch a friend who stopped being fun to be around because they're going through difficult times.
Joined: 4/13/2012
Msg: 449
Justifying Cheating?
Posted: 8/5/2012 7:05:34 AM
they get stale, bored, no excitement and then someon comes along and reignites the fire they miss
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