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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.      Home login  
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 brock11
Joined: 8/6/2007
Msg: 115
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.Page 4 of 21    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21)
I don't think anyone should settle. Yet people also need to have realistic and reasonable expectations. Personally I wouldn't date someone that is completely not my type, but I would date someone that is a little different than my usual type. For example, if I usually prefer slim or average size women, I wouldn't turn down a woman just because she is 20 lbs overweight if she matches most of the other things I was looking for.
 booboo1956
Joined: 9/1/2007
Msg: 117
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/12/2007 4:49:55 PM
I would rather be lonely and alone and know why, then lonely with someone and wonder why.
 Aimaree
Joined: 7/26/2007
Msg: 118
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/12/2007 4:55:36 PM
I take door A for Alone. Sitting next to your spouse in the same room and feeling so lonely you'd like to die is one of the most miserable feelings I've ever experienced. Get a dog, join a gym, take up a new hobby, read that book you've always wanted to really dig into..but never settle.
 soberkitty
Joined: 10/11/2006
Msg: 120
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/12/2007 5:52:23 PM
Taking the "not my type" out of the equation (as my 'type' seems to be changing), I would much rather be alone than just settle for the sake of having 'someone' in my life. Though I have my periods of loneliness, I would much rather deal with that feeling than the feelings of misery, discontent, and frustration that settling ultimately leads to. I am definitely not one of those people who think a bad relationship is better than no relationship. Why be in a (self destructive) relationship when the "right one" could appear at any moment ???


>>^..^<<
 celebrtlife
Joined: 5/23/2007
Msg: 121
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/13/2007 2:13:40 PM
Alone. I certainly would not want someone I am not compatable with to check in with. I don't like checking in with someone anyways, so why would I want to check in with someone who annoys me?
A big ALONE !!!
 soberkitty
Joined: 10/11/2006
Msg: 123
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/13/2007 10:10:18 PM

At this stage in my life I want that one last great love...the one that makes me smile just to think about him... the one that makes me melt at the mere sight of him... the one I can whisper softly to and share my deepest thoughts with...the one that makes my heart go pitter patter now and 20 years from now. The one that fits in and around me totally and absolutely and me to him. If I can't have that, so be it. I'll have my dreams, my hopes, yes my lonliness, but I'll have me and that's not such a bad place to be.


I'm totally with you on this enchantability !!!

Life is too precious, and too short to just "settle". I'll take the lonely days and be happy with who I am today, rather than just having a warm body beside me for the sake of not being alone. That kind of misery only lasts a short moment ~ who wants an entire lifetime of misery with the wrong purrson ??? Certainly not me

>>^..^<<
 Ferrus Manus
Joined: 2/14/2007
Msg: 124
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Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/13/2007 10:19:26 PM
why settle? financial gain? "type"? what the **** is type. love is love, if you feel it, stay, if not, be alone
 ManeRider
Joined: 5/22/2005
Msg: 126
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Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/13/2007 10:31:53 PM
Settle:

You never know when a free house will come along, again!!.

After you deplete the bank accounts and sign over titles on all the cars, trucks, boats, and motorhomes, you can look back on it and just say......" it was a learning experience!!!!"
 ItsMargo
Joined: 4/24/2007
Msg: 128
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Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 5:36:28 AM
What is "type"? I've never been in a relationship with one person who more than superficially resembled a different person I was in relationship with. Nor have I ever found one person who was completely compatible with all of the me's that make up the me that I am. So, is accepting that no one person will bring me everything "settling"?
 okeedokee444
Joined: 7/21/2007
Msg: 129
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 5:46:40 AM
What I get a kick out of is when some single women say, "He must be 6 feet or taller" and she's only 5'1".....and she says, "I know what I like and won't settling"

Personally, I don't think "Settling" on someone that's 5'10" is...SETTLING.
 Suju
Joined: 11/8/2006
Msg: 130
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 6:07:12 AM
I am definately better off alone than to be with someone I am not compatible with. Incompatibility breeds frustrations and the eventual end of the relationship, after all is said & done.
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 131
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Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 6:18:58 AM
^^^
... when some single women say, "He must be 6 feet or taller" ...
No doubt they say that with the hope that he will be at least 5'9" ... since most men add a couple of inches when they post their height.

I think the "height" issue has more to do with men lying about how tall they really are or in most cases, how tall they really are NOT.

Some of us just really detest a liar. There can be no basis for trust when people lie, no matter how "small" the lie ... we just don't want someone who will blatantly lie to us.

I recently went out with a gentleman who insists he's 5' 11 3/4" so he put down 6'. That would have been fine except that he might be (at the most) 5'9". He lists his weight as "Average". At the least, he is carrying around several extra pounds. The pictures on his profile must be from several years ago. That ... or he gained about 30 pounds in the past month?

I just don't get it ... why can't people just be honest about it? What is the sense in lying about things that are so apparent? If a person is going to lie about something so apparent ... what are they lying about that is not so apparent?

Don't they get it? Who can ever trust a liar?

OT ...
In light of all the dishonesty ... I'd rather be alone than settle.
 ItsMargo
Joined: 4/24/2007
Msg: 132
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Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 6:29:26 AM

I am definately better off alone than to be with someone I am not compatible with. Incompatibility breeds frustrations and the eventual end of the relationship, after all is said & done.

I agree compatibility is key. However elusive it is. What is incompatibility, I wonder? No one ever matches totally with another human being. I suppose it is one of those "unanswerable" questions... perhaps it really comes down to resonating with each other across a broad enough spectrum that it can maintain over time. Or not having things that are significantly different as to get the other person's panties in a twist. But if that is the case, how do you know if you are "settling"?
 swamp thing
Joined: 9/3/2007
Msg: 134
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 6:57:06 AM
I think it is better to settle for someone who is not your type, because that way you get both. You get to be with someone who is not your type AND you get to be terribly alone. Nothing feels so alone as being with someone who is not your type.

But if you just chose to be alone, you would not be quite as alone, nor would you get to be with someone who is not your type. It's a clear choice, to me.
 GreatAttitude
Joined: 1/3/2007
Msg: 136
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 2:18:00 PM
It is FAR better to be alone than to 'settle' for someone who does not make your toes curl. PRIMARILY because you may be tempted down the road to go toe curling with the first man who comes along that strikes your fancy.

If you are with someone who 'does it' for you - in EVERY WAY - then you never notice the GQ models all around you because your man is the only model you ever see.

The second reason you don't settle for someone who is not your type, is because HE TOO deserves someone who loves him for who he is. Don't rob him of that opportunity.
 gardennut
Joined: 6/22/2006
Msg: 137
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 2:43:24 PM
It is much better to settle for someone who is not your type. Being alone sucks.

Meanwhile you can scope out a better prospect and dump the one who is not your type once you find him/her. It's way easier to dump someone you were settling for anyway. That way you don't get hurt and you didn't have to spend any time alone.

 leggomyeggo
Joined: 8/11/2007
Msg: 138
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 2:49:22 PM
Roll your eyes all you want ,you garden nut you, but the sad reality is that this is exactly what many people do and justify it any way they can.

 gardennut
Joined: 6/22/2006
Msg: 139
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 2:55:26 PM

Roll your eyes all you want, you garden nut you, but the sad reality is that this is exactly what many people do and justify it any way they can.


Well, where do you think I got these tips? That's the only type I used to date!
 ChunLi FOREVER
Joined: 5/31/2007
Msg: 140
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 3:44:58 PM
Some just like the milk...if the cow is willing to give...a win-win situation?
 picker_grinner
Joined: 7/26/2005
Msg: 141
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 3:59:02 PM

I think it's better to be alone because then you can wake each day with optimism toward the future.
Settling for the not your type will make it hard to sleep because you already know what you're waking up to.
 Just JJ
Joined: 2/20/2007
Msg: 142
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 4:01:51 PM
Better to be alone and content , than together and miserable.
 Jen4u
Joined: 7/16/2004
Msg: 143
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 4:05:37 PM
I would rather be alone than settle in any way shape or form . I want a love that is ALL things;friendship,passion,chemistry, the whole picture. But I'm sorry, I know that all three times I fell in love, I knew within days and said it within weeks of meeting. If it took a guy three months, I'd be worried. Guess that's just me, but I honestly believe love is in the first meeting and grows from there. If it's there, it's there and when it's not I don't waste my time.
 tlcntexas
Joined: 7/7/2007
Msg: 145
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 7:27:46 PM
Alone. I want the ENTIRE package... love, attraction, chemistry, trust, friendship, etc. I know it exists therefore I will settle for nothing less.

I settled once and thought it would be okay. 15 years of marriage taught me how miserable it can be. I'll never make that mistake again no matter how lonely I might feel sometimes. I'll take alone and content over being together and miserable any day of the week.
 Tango57
Joined: 2/21/2005
Msg: 146
Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 7:38:51 PM
I'd rather die alone scrubbing toilet bowls with a tiny toothbrush than settle!!!!!
 stormy15
Joined: 7/20/2007
Msg: 147
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Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 9/14/2007 8:29:37 PM
No doubt about it a hundred times better to be alone....I will never settle for less than what I am looking for. Been there done that....don't ever want to repeat that nightmare. I wouldn't want to do that to a man either....that is just not fair and will eventually make both people miserable and life is just too short to be miserable. So be Happy and wait for that right person to walk into your life....yeeeeeeeeehaaaaaaaaaaa!
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