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Joined: 5/29/2009
Msg: 20
Need advice on moving out / ending relationshipPage 3 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Go to couple's therapy. Honestly.

True that, and if you want magic, see the magic man who incorporates "sexual healing." Don't just look it up in the book. Get referrals.
Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 22
view profile
Need advice on moving out / ending relationship
Posted: 7/28/2009 7:35:05 PM
What brought you two together if you never got off the ground to begin with ? There must be something of value in this relationship for both of you to stay in it this long. Maybe counseling would help. If the passion has gone out of the relationship, find a way to get it back.Sometimes we tend to take things for granted instead of cherishing them.How would you feel if he left you because he felt he was just doing time ? Nobody holds the key to your freedom but you.
Joined: 4/1/2009
Msg: 24
Need advice on moving out / ending relationship
Posted: 7/28/2009 8:39:38 PM
I would agree....pick one...move on...or stay and committed...might be the best
thing you do for you and your partner...
Joined: 3/1/2009
Msg: 25
view profile
Need advice on moving out / ending relationship
Posted: 7/28/2009 10:15:45 PM
We've all had a first failed relationship ... not a station-wagon romance, but what we thought was the real thing at one time or another ... only to have it go sour. Despite what precipitated it or what followed, we survived. We're here, aren't we?

We've just grown complacent and our lives/possessions are very much intertwined.
Concern over "How am I going to make it?" is very real, as it should be. But it should not be the tie that binds. The financial issues you mentioned, coupled with "possessions ... intertwined" says to me that you're over-emphasizing the materialistic aspects and missing the greater ones of your personal happiness. This is where only IsabelK knows what's best for IsabelK, and is a decision YOU must make on your own.

Trust me, some of the blunt comments here may not be exactly what you wanted to hear, but they're certainly valid. You see, you never really figure out what makes you truly happy (fulfilled, content, etc.) until you've experienced what does NOT make you happy. I'm confident it's safe to say a lot of us here have taken financial/material knocks one helluva a lot harder than you're worried about facing. Again, we've survived ... more importantly, we're moving on.

My soul has left the building ... There is just no joy or passion ...
In a "Hill Street Blues" episode, characters Frank and Joyce (perhaps Fay? -- whatever) were talking about their romance fading. A line (to the effect of), "The magic is just gone," was used. That perfectly summed-up the live-in relationship I was in at the time, and was the inspiration we both needed to end things amiably ... before we'd part as enemies. Dumb as this analogy sounds, I think it illustrates your situation (and the reality you must come to grips with) quite well.

You'll do just fine.
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