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 Gaddflye
Joined: 9/10/2008
Msg: 76
Health issues and finding a partner at our agePage 4 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
In response to Cotter's post what I find is many women over 50 suffer from AV, atrophying vagina, and are no longer interested in sex. I wish they would be up front with it so they would not waste men's time and money. But they are not so we frequently just end up spinning our wheels, spending our time and money on them for nothing.
 tinkerbellcgy
Joined: 9/17/2005
Msg: 77
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Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/6/2009 7:07:34 PM
Mr. gaddflye wrote:

what I find is many women over 50 suffer from AV, atrophying vagina, and are no longer interested in sex. I wish they would be up front with it so they would not waste men's time and money. But they are not so we frequently just end up spinning our wheels, spending our time and money on them for nothing.

In an effort to save you from possible financial ruin, might I respectfully submit that perhaps you request potential new lady friends complete a detailed "application form" and submit same for your consideration prior to actually having a date with you. By pre-screening potential new dates, it ensures that you will get the biggest bang for your buck!
 stevelfun
Joined: 10/23/2005
Msg: 78
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/7/2009 5:50:44 AM
I do not think that anyone needs 'cancer' to get them to 'look in the mirror' nor gain a better appreciation for all that one is.

My point was that we all have our own characteristics that someone else might well view as a 'shortcoming'.

I really don't 'fault' anyone for viewing someone having/had cancer as such, however I wish it weren't so popular a viewpoint.

Basically, I view it as any other 'characteristic' - age, body type, geographic location, color of eyes, career, income, religion, hair color, hair and on and on and on. These are all things that we 'evaluate' the viability of a potential mate. What is the difference with this??? I didn't have a choice in my hair receeding either - so it isn't 'choice'.

I think that many people tend to focus on the 'negative' rather than the positive.

In life, in general, I try to look at the negative and find a positive aspect to it. Like with the cancer - the fact that it has made me so much more (or at least re-iterated to me) than I was (or realized) before. Being widowed, I view it as the gods blessed me to bring my wife to me for the remainder of her life in this world.

If you look - you will always find negative things about anything/anyone. It is much better to look at positive things people.

As for people sending me emails, I have tried to remove any/all restrictions. Age is not a restriction by the way. More likely the 'intimate encounters' thing. Something that has been on there since forever and always been a problem. Don't know how it got there - must have been a selection I didn't pay attention to when I was creating my profile here years ago. I have tried to change this, but I think that they do not allow that. Such is life. Besides - this site isn't and the people on it are of a different mindset than I believe I will find someone that will fit for me.

Best to all.
 peek~a~booo
Joined: 1/3/2007
Msg: 79
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/7/2009 6:05:08 AM
it takes focus to stay in positive light...no fear fishy practice makes perfict....

me thinks when you find yourself focusing on the bad in others simply redirect to the postive aspects of that human...not one single human is unloveable unless you make a choice to only see the bad. recognision does not mean you have to give away your soul but understand that every human does require the respect of dignity in their lot in life....

I find now that i am older my pool has grown cuz others can relate to feeling yucky and surviving without fear(when i was younger often times the recognision of others was just not developed yet!)...even if we are not a match I almost always have a open communication about the reality of health and how it can change up the sequence of your life.

a big goodluck to all those fish who think your not loveable....cute as a button ...


don't allow others the power to not shine your light...even if it is not as pretty as everyone elses..................takes out sunshine.......perfict just the way you are indeed....goodluck fishin

ones individuality is unique to yourself..there is not another human on the planet just like you...only YOU don't realize it..........well REALIZE IT and OWN IT!

goodluck lil fish...kisses on forehead....all for one and one for all.

 thecatsmeoww
Joined: 3/7/2009
Msg: 80
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/7/2009 6:08:55 AM

In an effort to save you from possible financial ruin, might I respectfully submit that perhaps you request potential new lady friends complete a detailed "application form" and submit same for your consideration prior to actually having a date with you. By pre-screening potential new dates, it ensures that you will get the biggest bang for your buck!


Hilarious!!!! Now ladies just remember to practice your Kegel exercises: to strengthen your pelvic floor muscles.. Men would be wise to do them as well!!!

After all we do not wish to atrophy while we bide our time twiddling our thumbs?

thecatsmeoww
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 81
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Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/7/2009 5:22:01 PM
Message 91 (gaddflye) ...
In response to Cotter's post what I find is many women over 50 suffer from AV, atrophying vagina, and are no longer interested in sex.
I don't know if you are trying to be funny, but vaginal atrophy is a series of natural changes which take place in the vagina as women age and their estrogen levels decrease. It has less to do with "interest" in sex and a lot to do with lack of hormone production after menopause. That can mean having sex could be quite painful (which no doubt probably contributes to lack of interest ... eh?).

As estrogen production declines, the tissues in the vagina become dry, thin, and shrunken. This can cause aches and pains, and it tends to make intercourse unpleasant because suitable lubrication is not available.

Amazing isn't it ... the women are basically not at fault (except to get old enough to stop having their period), can live a healthy lifestyle, not be fat or obese, not have diabetes (as a result of letting themselves go) ... they are just no longer able to bear children, and the vaginal tissue can get so dry, thin and shrunken that it's extremely painful to have sex. FYI ... the atrophy can also spread to the urinary tract, leading to difficulty urinating, bloody urine, and other problems.

On the other hand, for the most part, most men who have ED ... have basically gotten that way related to a lifestyle of choice ... getting overweight, which leads to Diabetes, Stroke, Heart Disease, Hypertension ... but they also have ways of getting help for their problem whereas there is not much help out there for the women once the damage has been done.

I wish they would be up front with it so they would not waste men's time and money. But they are not so we frequently just end up spinning our wheels, spending our time and money on them for nothing.
I guess the conversation was not worth it ... for sure not the time spent not being totally alone. Spending time and money on a woman who is not going to "put out" because it's so very painful ... that's a bummer!!!

Too bad there is no Cialis, Viagra and Levitra for vaginal atrophy. Then men could stop wasting time and money on women ... spinning their wheels for nothing. Then men could actually date women and get them to put out all the time ... eh?

As I posted above, I have my HRT, so I don't have that problem, but LMAO ... I still don't "put out"!!! Bummer eh?

OT ...
I think it's perfectly acceptable to want a partner who is about the same level ... health wise and financially able to take care of themselves. Personally, I'm still interested in having sex and want a man who is also interested in that as well.

LMAO ... I once dated a man who had ED and didn't tell me until things started heating up a few months down the road. He had a little box of toys that he wanted to use ... instead of his "winky". I basically told him I really don't want to put anything up inside of me like that ... I just want the real thing.

We continued to date and did a lot of snuggling, but eventually parted as good friends. We still go out singing together from time to time.
 barra60
Joined: 8/2/2009
Msg: 82
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/7/2009 8:02:51 PM
Well I have two bad knees which slow my running down a bit ,,,, and yet none of you ladies has caught me !!!!!!! you mustn't be trying very hard
 eschec mat
Joined: 3/3/2009
Msg: 83
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/7/2009 11:05:06 PM
As there is a connection between hbp and ED and meds for hbp causing ED too, I know I witnessed it. They can get r up but can't cum as they don't realize they really aren't fully...

Beer bellies often indicate too much alcohol and too much alcohol leads to ED.

Diabetes is another problem with people that are overweight.

It is a generalization, but when you check to see who predominately has ED, the above groups top the list.

Not trying to defend anyone, just stating things I have read about etc.
 thecatsmeoww
Joined: 3/7/2009
Msg: 84
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/8/2009 5:07:34 AM

what I find is many women over 50 suffer from AV, atrophying vagina, and are no longer interested in sex. I wish they would be up front with it so they would not waste men's time and money. But they are not so we frequently just end up spinning our wheels, spending our time and money on them for nothing.


Okay I answered this just for fun the other day. However this morning I promise I will not joke around. The above condition is very easy to remedy with proper diet and working those muscles.. Having lived a celibate life for 14 years I found myself in this horrible condition myself. If you do not use those muscles chances are that will be the outcome.. So even if not involved in a relationship you would be wise to work those muscles on a daily basis. I will do it between grooming, waiting at a bus stop or at the bank. So put the big squeeze on and get the blood flowing to those areas of your body!!

As for men with ED work your core muscles and try and simulate the
"plank position "(missionary position without leaning on the woman). Work it and get that blood to flow to those areas will be beneficial.

What is to be upfront about something that can easily be dealt with? Use a lubricant until such time as her muscles get used to being worked once again.

thecatsmeoww
 stevelfun
Joined: 10/23/2005
Msg: 85
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/8/2009 6:10:30 AM
cats - if the hormone level ain't there - all the kegels in the world won't help

yes - part of it indeed is blood circulation, HOWEVER if you were to understand the male anatomy and 'how it works' - the problem typically with ED is that the blood is not retained were it needs to be to maintain an erection. Kegels will not help resolve this problem.

Just as in women - blood circulation, hormone levels and muscle tone all play into the 'functioning'

They have meds that 'tweek' the nervous connection between the brain and certain body organs. One example is a med that chemo patients are given - EMEND - if I recall. It blocks the nervous systems connection between the brain and stomach that will cause one to vomit.

Imagine if you would if they could 'tweek' the nervous connection between the brain and ones sexual organs - causing one to become aroused.

I am sure that day will come.

All of these things for both men and women enter into it - the brain/body connection causing arousal, the hormones, the blood circulation, the muscle tone.
 thecatsmeoww
Joined: 3/7/2009
Msg: 86
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/8/2009 6:23:21 AM

cats - if the hormone level ain't there - all the kegels in the world won't help


Well hormonal levels for men could be helped with testosterone could they not? As for women I do not think hormone levels play as big factor. In fact when I went through the change in my 30's my hormone levels were checked it showed I was almost male. My testosterone levels were very very high and almost no female hormones. I must admit I was rather shocked to hear this. I am sure this could have been due to excessive time spent working out. My libido was certainly very very high at that time.

Indeed the nerves play a huge factor as well, and not just the muscles. It will be nice once they can 'tweek' the connection one day and solve the problem and I do not think that day will be all that far off. However I am an optimist by nature.. lol

thecatsmeoww
 RenaissanceMan1950
Joined: 2/20/2009
Msg: 87
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/8/2009 7:39:51 AM

Message 91 (gaddflye) ...
In response to Cotter's post what I find is many women over 50 suffer from AV, atrophying vagina, and are no longer interested in sex.
I don't know if you are trying to be funny, but vaginal atrophy is a series of natural changes which take place in the vagina as women age and their estrogen levels decrease. It has less to do with "interest" in sex and a lot to do with lack of hormone production after menopause. That can mean having sex could be quite painful (which no doubt probably contributes to lack of interest ... eh?).



Cotter-As estrogen production declines, the tissues in the vagina become dry, thin, and shrunken. This can cause aches and pains, and it tends to make intercourse unpleasant because suitable lubrication is not available.

Amazing isn't it ... the women are basically not at fault


It's not a matter of "fault". The only "fault" I'd see would be if a woman knows that a man is interested in her, in anticipation of a "normal" relationship, and she withholds the information, while enjoying the attention, affection, etc.. all the while knowing that she will never "go there", because it's too painful.

It's not anybody's fault that all sorts of health conditions might exist that make sex impossible. However, it is wrong for them not to seek out "just friends", perhaps with similar or complementary types of issues, rather than ensnare others who expect things to progress towards an actual relationship, that would include having a sex life.
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 88
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Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/8/2009 8:18:16 AM


what I find is many women over 50 suffer from AV, atrophying vagina ...

The above condition is very easy to remedy with proper diet and working those muscles.
Vaginal dryness and atrophy is NOT caused by "celibacy" ... ... or all teenage girls would never be able to have sex ... eh? After all, they are celibate until they have their "first" sexual encounter ... right?

The body DOES NOT produce hormones (the lack of which is the major cause for vaginal dryness and NOT celibacy) based on diet or exercising muscles. The condition can be reversed in many cases by the use of Hormone Replacement Therapy (pill forms, vaginal creams, and even patches) if the therapy is started in time ... before too much damage has already occurred.


As for men with ED work your core muscles and try and simulate the
"plank position "
No amount of any kind of "special" exercises will "repair" the neuropathy caused by Diabetes ... it's "Autonomic" and sometimes "Focal" or a combination thereof.

Once the damage is done ... there are medications that can assist with achieving an erection and maintaining an erection, but one cannot "repair" nerve damage with cute "special" exercises. The nerves have been (most likely) damaged by years of the disease being present in their body.

All men have Estrogen in their bodies, and most overweight men have no idea what they're doing to themselves by getting and maintaining that extra belly fat ... it causes extra production of Estrogen. Does anyone know what Estrogen injections do to a man who is (for example) attempting a sexual change? Uh-huh ... it produces breasts (man boobs?) and basically STOPS the erections!!!


Well hormonal levels for men could be helped with testosterone could they not?
Yes they could, but they have also discovered that giving men extra testosterone (usually in gels spread on their upper cavity or in patches worn on their upper cavity) contributes to men losing their hair (more quickly) and also "feeds" prostate cancer in older men.

The hair loss does not concern me, but the loss of my partner due to the cancer is not something I would look forward to.

As for women I do not think hormone levels play as big factor. In fact when I went through the change in my 30's my hormone levels were checked it showed I was almost male. My testosterone levels were very very high ...
Which means your Estrogen levels were probably bottoming out and that's what causes the vaginal dryness and then the atrophy also sets in. As I said above, women have a chance of reversing it in a variety of ways, but often the atrophy spreads to the urethral area and that damage cannot be undone.

The only "fault" I'd see would be if a woman knows that a man is interested in her, in anticipation of a "normal" relationship, and she withholds the information, while enjoying the attention, affection, etc.. all the while knowing that she will never "go there", because it's too painful.
That's absolutely right!!! I totally agree!!! And I actually do know women who really are not looking to do anything but date around ... with no intention of ever having sex again. I think it would be very unfair for them to lead men on.

It's not anybody's fault that all sorts of health conditions might exist that make sex impossible.
That statement is not entirely true, only because we do have control over diet, and weight gain and lifestyles which is a major factor in what causes many of our health issues that do lead to problems with sex ... down the road ... later in life.

OT ...
I'm not in favor of medical history discussions on the first few dates, but on the other hand, once one discovers where a perspective relationship may be leading ... then if there might be problems, I think it should be disclosed. If for no other reason but to give the perspective partner a chance to re-think their postion.
 thecatsmeoww
Joined: 3/7/2009
Msg: 89
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/8/2009 8:21:58 AM

It's not anybody's fault that all sorts of health conditions might exist that make sex impossible. However, it is wrong for them not to seek out "just friends", perhaps with similar or complementary types of issues, rather than ensnare others who expect things to progress towards an actual relationship, that would include having a sex life.


OMG this does not make things impossible!!!! I am shaking my head here in complete disbelief.. This is most certainly not a doomsday prognosis and to throw in the towel on it!!!

Just get yourself a donut cause you might not be able to sit down for a week.. You might even have to consider applying ice packs to reduce the swelling cause you might well feel like you were in a boxing match. Be ready with some ice because you can become so swollen you might not be able to urinate properly..

Just another challenge and one that can be dealt with very successfully..

thecatsmeoww
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 90
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/8/2009 10:04:15 AM
Cats, you're right it's not doomsday. . . .IF the person *wants* to do something about it. But I know peeps of both the feminine persuasion and the masculine one who seem to be resigned, content, and in some cases absolutely delighted, not to have to have anything to do wit' dat bidness any more. It's surely not me, nor obviously most here, but it seems to me to be a large and growing cohort.

My EX who belongs to the content contingent dated a woman for about 15 years who belongs to the delighted faction. They did very well together, until she decided she wanted to travel, and he didn't. She then married an 82 year old man who did want to *travel* and till death did them part.

To each, his/her own. . . . Just be upfront about the deal, eh?

 eschec mat
Joined: 3/3/2009
Msg: 91
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/8/2009 10:25:37 AM
Cats, you're right it's not doomsday. . . .IF the person *wants* to do something about it. But I know peeps of both the feminine persuasion and the masculine one who seem to be resigned, content, and in some cases absolutely delighted, not to have to have anything to do wit' dat bidness any more.
Having gone to red hat events, I know there are mixed reactions from the post men. women. Ummmm maybe that was a bad abbreviation But honestly some are post men too. Some enjoy the company of females because they don't have to worry about a man trying to go any farther. Some enjoy the company of men because they want to share with a man. Some want the whole ball of wax with a man.

I knew one man that had a pump. Didn't get off, but still wanted to have sex. His wife divorced him. She didn't dig the pump among other things.

My mom's husband was quite large and developed diabetes, hbp etc. and had to take medication. My mom was pissed when he came home with a blue pill one day. He died of a heart attack at like 54. My mom was 64 at the time. Her husband before that drank excessive beer. He had a heart attack that I witnessed. He still wanted to drink beer after he got home from having bypasses.

Personally, I can deal with quite a few things, but an inflexible man, a man with a large belly, forget it. I still enjoy sex and different positions. I think it is part of your preferences.

I am curious about the urethra comment, as the purpose of it is to urinate. I don't understand the comment about drying to that point. It is my understanding that vaginal dryness would effect the whole vagina and not start one area and stop another. That most of the wetness actually is formed internally and needs to be brought down or outside. That if you require additional lubrication, it would be for the whole area, not just the opening.

I have also never heard of AV. I thought that was a joke, something someone made up. I didn't google it, but since I am posting, please explain that. I can see muscles atrophying, but a vagina???
 *mae* flowers
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 92
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/8/2009 11:20:39 AM
imo, the health issues would be with ones own heart and soul,the ones who look forward to each day would be my only health concern with a prospective partner.

I love and admire positive people who feel life with all the senses. Unafraid to be not perfect,to be human, and love and be loved


...Ah Jim. What can I say? What can I add? You said it perfectly. That kind of thing warms my heart......It also makes me wonder why people like you are still single.


As for *theirs* -- so far no deal breakers. If the soul is in good shape, and we're hitting on all cylinders, who gives a rat's patootie?

I feel sad sometime for those that hoard their hoped for happiness against all threats: there IS no wisdom in "security."


..And wooby...you have no idea how much I admire you. You are my ideal role model. I aspire to be just like you.

...maeflowers
 thecatsmeoww
Joined: 3/7/2009
Msg: 93
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/8/2009 11:33:56 AM

have also never heard of AV. I thought that was a joke, something someone made up. I didn't google it, but since I am posting, please explain that. I can see muscles atrophying, but a vagina???


As we age, the pelvic floor muscles weaken, shrink and atrophy from disuse. If not in an active relatioship important to work those muscles!!! Symptoms include pelvic pain, bladder dysfunction, lack of sexual response, pain with intercourse, and lower back discomfort.

thecatsmeoww
 thecatsmeoww
Joined: 3/7/2009
Msg: 94
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/8/2009 12:19:45 PM

IF the person *wants* to do something about it. But I know peeps of both the feminine persuasion and the masculine one who seem to be resigned, content, and in some cases absolutely delighted, not to have to have anything to do wit' dat bidness any more. It's surely not me, nor obviously most here, but it seems to me to be a large and growing cohort.


Oh I know a few that are also resigned as well and appear delighted at their decision. However even that can change as I have seen it happen.. I agree that it does seem to more common today that I believe it was years ago.

If not interested indeed be upfront about it.. but consider that not written in stone either. Tomorrow can be a new day and feelings can and do change.

thecatsmeoww
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 95
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History
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/9/2009 2:08:39 AM

I am curious about the urethra comment, as the purpose of it is to urinate. I don't understand the comment about drying to that point. It is my understanding that vaginal dryness would effect the whole vagina and not start one area and stop another.



I have also never heard of AV. I thought that was a joke, something someone made up. I didn't google it, but since I am posting, please explain that. I can see muscles atrophying, but a vagina???

As we age, the pelvic floor muscles weaken, shrink and atrophy from disuse. If not in an active relatioship important to work those muscles!!!
Sigh ... once again, vaginal atrophy has to do with mucous membranes drying out (NOT muscle tissue) ... which is a result of lack of hormones causing the mucous membranes to dry up ... and the urethra is included in that. That's why I posted that ... "often the atrophy spreads to the urethral area" ... because it does and when the urethra atrophies (shrivels up) it's obviously going to affect your ability to urinate (empty the bladder).

Sorry, no amount of those "cute" muscle exercises will affect the "mucous membranes" that are affected by the lack of hormones in our bodies after menopause. No amount of those "cute" muscle exercises keeps mucous membranes from drying up if the hormones are not present.

http://www.micronutra.com/journal/ed/overweight-men-are-more-likely-to-have-ed
Overweight Men Are More Likely to Have ED

Eighty percent of men with ED are either overweight or obese. While this may be due in part to the elevated risk of high blood pressure, arteriosclerosis, and diabetes, the relationship between overweight and ED holds true even in otherwise healthy individuals.

One theory is that the disruption of hormonal balance that occurs as a result of obesity may cause insufficient androgens (testosterone and related molecules) to be available to achieve or sustain an erection. Another theory posits that the elevated oxidative stress and resultant chronic inflammation caused by obesity may damage the cells lining the blood vessels, known as endothelials. These damaged cells then contribute to the development of ED.

The Benefits of Exercise

Population rates for ED begin to go up by about five percent a year after the age of forty-five. However, in men who exercise regularly, there is a ten-year delay in the onset of ED. This prompted researchers to examine the possibility of exercise reversing the effects of ED.

Working with men who were overweight or obese and had ED, but no other health problems, researchers found that losing weight through diet and exercise helped restore erectile function.

In one out of every three participants, a ten percent weight reduction was all it took to completely restore erectile function. The rest of the men only saw improvements following more significant weight loss, but in the end, all the participants noted a positive impact on their erectile health once they lost weight.


http://www.howtogetsixpack.com/stomach-fat-problems.html
Stomach Fat Risks for Men and Women

It is commonly considered that men are at greater risk of health problems related to belly fat since men tend to collect more abdominal fat than women.

Some studies suggest that men have more coronary disease than women and those who have excess stomach fat are most at risk for the so called "all-cause mortality" (that is early death from any cause). Erectile dysfunction is also considered to be related to excess abdominal fat.
So guys ... try your best to keep off the belly fat!!!!!

OT ...
The first few dates are not the setting for discussing things as above with a perspective partner, but even the fact that we may at some point need to have that discussion, should cause us to take note and just not let it come to that.
 thecatsmeoww
Joined: 3/7/2009
Msg: 96
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/9/2009 5:11:36 AM

Which means your Estrogen levels were probably bottoming out and that's what causes the vaginal dryness and then the atrophy also sets in. As I said above, women have a chance of reversing it in a variety of ways, but often the atrophy spreads to the urethral area and that damage cannot be undone.


Interesting.. not sure how I reversed it other than eating a very healthy diet and doing my excercises.. At any rate glad I managed to without taking any hormones.

thecatsmeoww
 RenaissanceMan1950
Joined: 2/20/2009
Msg: 97
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/9/2009 5:41:15 AM
While it may be "interesting" to some to dissect the reasons that some people become sexually dysfunctional, that's not really the topic.

The topic was about how health issues affect choosing someone to start dating in the first place. While there are some on here, who post as if they were Mother Teresa, and it all sounds wonderful and "politically correct", I have to wonder how many people actually would choose to begin with someone with a serious health issue.

I know that I wouldn't begin something new with someone, who has a serious health issue that affects her ability to function in a relationship. That would include sexual dysfunction, but there are a lot of other things too. I would not start dating someone with a terminal cancer, as an example. I have dated cancer survivors, though, who were in remission. I wouldn't start dating someone with a serious disability, and I try really hard not to date someone who has a serious mental or emotional disorder, although it has happened.

Being a friend to someone, who has a serious health issue? Sure, I'd do that. I could imagine being a "pen pal" with a lonely woman, who has a terminal diagnosis. I think remaining in a relationship, if someone you're already involved with suddenly comes down with a disease or suffers a disability. You're already attached at that point. But, to begin something new....no way.
 thecatsmeoww
Joined: 3/7/2009
Msg: 98
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/9/2009 7:28:06 AM

Sorry, no amount of those "cute" muscle exercises will affect the "mucous membranes" that are affected by the lack of hormones in our bodies after menopause. No amount of those "cute" muscle exercises keeps mucous membranes from drying up if the hormones are not present.


No but making dishes using Flax seed sure will. I finally found the answer and I had a gut feeling it had to do with my diet.
Flax seed: Helps with vaginal dryness and the overall environment of your vagina. I make crusts out of flax seed, I also use it as a breading on some of my veggie dishes..

Too often we find out some of these hormones cause cancer a more holistic approach in my books is far safer and you can reap the benefits..

thecatsmeoww
 thecatsmeoww
Joined: 3/7/2009
Msg: 99
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/9/2009 7:30:57 AM

While it may be "interesting" to some to dissect the reasons that some people become sexually dysfunctional, that's not really the topic.


As far as my understand of this thread goes we are discussing health issues as well as finding a partner at our age. There has been a lot of good input on this thread as far as being helpful to those that may or may not be experiencing problems. It certainly has motivated me to look more into topics that I might not have otherwise.

thecatsmeoww
 eschec mat
Joined: 3/3/2009
Msg: 100
Health issues and finding a partner at our age
Posted: 8/9/2009 7:34:18 AM
Cotter thank you for explaining that. Thank you cat also. I am not even pre peri according to my doctor ie still on bcp's. But ya know my bf is 10 years younger, so figure I should be having sex for some time and really never heard of the atrophy before. It isn't something ever discussed as far as I have seen. This is a health issue and it would be important to discuss with someone you are involved with and seems it is totally on topic. Getting a bit tired of reading people stating that their comments that are off topic about weather or old outdated theories in other threads are ok to be off topic but they complain about a thread about health issues where a health matter is being fully described is off topic. I think any health issue discussed in this thread to be totally on topic, because that explains why and when you might discuss it with a partner. geez...

On another thread I mentioned that I learn from these threads. I know my doctor never brought this up and still hasn't given me any information about pre or peri menopause. I know I'm not there, but gosh, these are things we need to know about and as it can effect our partner, seems they are important topics to learn about the same as ED.

Recently I was reading about abdominal fat because there is a thread about beer bellies. Fat is fat, but abdominal fat is really bad. Abdominal fat is visceral fat. Visceral fat cells release their metabolic products directly into the blood, so free fatty acids from visceral fat accumulate in the liver and other organs. This impairs the body’s regulation of insulin, blood sugar, and cholesterol and leads to heart problems. Of course ED is a side effect. I say I won't go out with a guy that has a belly any more, it seems that I was correct about the connection between the possibility of poor health and abdominal fat. The belly is a bit more obvious than the women's atrophy problem.

I also noted that there is a misconception that having a belly and being thin isn't a problem, it is also.

I think we should all be born with personal trainers so that we can work on our problem areas...in my dreams.

I am glad that I don't have to have another talk about my challenges with another date, hopefully ever. Now if I could get the jerks that think they are parking police to back off with their looks, unappreciated questions/nosy questions, and obnoxious comments.
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