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 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 30
A question about Oral sexPage 2 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
There used to be a time, where having oral sex was punishable by death. Yet many of the people doing it, were members of the clergy.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 31
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 1:01:37 PM
It is obvious you disagree with me, and I am sure there are others that will also - but I simply feel that not respecting another persons boundaries/choices or preferences is immature and quite frankly rude.

I do respect their boundaries - by not dating them or sleeping with them. If a woman finds oral sex disgusting, she is just way too hung up for me. She's welcome to find someone with whom she is more compatible. I respect myself enough to put a price on me and that price is getting what I want. If others want to be sexual altruists and martyrs, that's up to them. As far as I'm concerned, if there is such a thing as ``the one,'' she performs oral sex to completion.

 Closer2U
Joined: 2/19/2009
Msg: 32
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 1:40:13 PM

Because they do not like it does not mean they are too inhibited. It means they have preferences. You prefer have oral sex as part of the experience - they prefer not too.

It is obvious you disagree with me, and I am sure there are others that will also - but I simply feel that not respecting another persons boundaries/choices or preferences is immature and quite frankly rude.


Seems to me......if someone is waiting for marriage to have sex...they might not know about how 'gross' oral sex might be.Having boundaries is one thing....coming into a SEX forum and acting like a child with boundaries devised outside the 'religious box' is pretty immature if you ask me.

Stick to the agenda, is what my contention is.Either you HAVE sex...or you don't before marriage and ORAL SEX most certainly is losing your virginity.

I can't stand hypocracy.If that makes me rude....so be it.

If someone comes in here trying to preach abstinence then it might be nice if they actually lived it.I have seen no less than 4 threads about waiting for marriage and virginity being moral until marriage and I for one.....find it LUDACRIOUS to take that risk.

Nothing like falling for someone emotionally only to find out you arent' sexually compatible....Does "GOD" have an out clause for that?Oh yeah...most religions balk at birth control and the abortion and divorce.....hmmm...sounds like FEMALE ENSLAVEMENT if you as me.

I'm about empowerment and sexual liberation....and can't understnd sexually repressed people AT ALL.

It's one thing to not want to give head...it's another thing to consider it disgusting.
That IS way too out of my realm to comprehend...and it's NOT rude to give an opinion. Take it or leave it......what do I care what she does really!

I'm still gonna suck me some D*CK!
And enjoy it in all it's NASTY GLORY!
 Ependa
Joined: 7/16/2009
Msg: 33
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 1:46:46 PM
Well, oral sex has been around a very long time...the earliest I know of written reference to it is in the Kama Sutra..which was written somewhere around the 5th century CE. I would surmise that it has been around since genitals and tongues have been in existence though ;-)
Well you know, if it's not your thing , then it's not. It is supposed to be fun, what's the point if you're stressed or grossed out by it? I'm sure there are other people for whom it's not a big deal or who feel the same as you. It's the most natural thing in the world though..very intimate. And performances don't cut it with oral sex anymore than they do sex...it's simply an expression /celebration of the human body and spirit...no performance necessary.
Personally, I don't which I like more , giving or receiving..probably giving. To each their own though =)
 Ifeellucky
Joined: 4/12/2009
Msg: 34
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 6:02:18 PM
all I can say is maybe your with the wrong partners... when you find someone you like, anything and everything will seem like the best thing on earth
 fatgirlsareloyal
Joined: 7/29/2009
Msg: 35
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 6:11:12 PM
I don't know if I just like or love giving a woman oral sex...

All I know is putting my tongue in a girls vagina is not THAT bad...it's not like I'm thinking omg I hate this the whole time I'm doing it.

All the girls I've dated in my life who either hated or wouldn't give blowjobs were all selfish in other areas as well so it really didn't shock me they hated giving oral sex.
 21RIP
Joined: 7/28/2009
Msg: 36
view profile
History
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/14/2009 6:26:11 PM
wow jesus christ!
 sglwhtmale
Joined: 7/9/2009
Msg: 37
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/15/2009 8:39:50 AM
Yeah you're cutting out alot of fun if you don't include oral sex,
giving or receiving!
 DudeistPriest
Joined: 3/30/2009
Msg: 38
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/15/2009 8:47:13 AM
Believe it or not, oral sex is instinctual! it abounds in the animal kingdom of which we are a part. It's more left over caveman stuff, back when we actually relied on our senses to survive. The senses of taste and smell are very closely related and at that basic, animalistic level, oral sex, function was to further identify a possible mate.
Not saying it functions the same way today, just saying that's where it comes from.
 lovemesomemen
Joined: 7/14/2009
Msg: 39
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/15/2009 10:25:14 AM
But there are things you can do with a tongue that you just can't do with your private goods


Use your fingers


I really think Oral sex is gross. I have had guys go down on me and I don't like it. I mean if you really like someone I think there will be natural passion and no need for all the performances. I just think it's nasty both ways guys doing it and girls. Oh here is another thing were does oral sex come from, like culturally, anyone know. It's just not my thing. Anyone agree not agreee, hwoch I am sure most won't agree but...wth


I agree Op.


all I can say is maybe your with the wrong partners... when you find someone you like, anything and everything will seem like the best thing on earth


Not necessarily. She doesn't like it. It's a preference.
 metalwench
Joined: 6/15/2009
Msg: 40
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/15/2009 11:32:26 AM
I enjoy both almost as much as sex..When you really enjoy doing it you tend to be better at it.
 rj2360
Joined: 5/3/2008
Msg: 41
view profile
History
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/15/2009 9:51:27 PM
Sex out of wed lock is a sin according to the church
 daydreamer57
Joined: 4/12/2009
Msg: 42
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/16/2009 5:28:12 AM
At 26 yrs old I doubt if you have had any real passion in any love making.....long kissing sessions....alot of foreplay.....touching every part of your physic....if the time was taken to relax you and your mood.....oral would be one real turn-on.....havnt met a woman yet that hasnt loved what and how I offer her.....and they have reciprocated....saying they never have bfore.....your young.....enjoy your life...goes quickly!
 sheepdog661
Joined: 6/18/2005
Msg: 43
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/16/2009 8:18:44 AM
As you've seen from the previous posts, it's a matter of preference. As long as there are no hygiene issues, I really enjoy giving pleasure to my partner in that way. I also enjoy getting a BJ if the gal is into it. If she's not into it, I'd rather her not do me any favors.

I had a long(ish)-term gf (she was 35 when we met) who did not like to receive oral at all. She would just tense up and it was not pleasurable for her. The rest of the sex was amazing. As our relationship progressed, she began to relax and "let" me go down on her. I think it was a comfort/trust issue that allowed this. We quickly reached a point where she was loving every minute of it.

I'm probably deluding myself, but I like to think I gave her the gift of being able to enjoy a new aspect of her sexuality.
 namrael
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 44
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/16/2009 9:39:26 AM
I mean if you really like someone I think there will be natural passion and no need for all the performances.


I think you misunderstand the point of oral sex. Ideally, it feels good and is part of the natural expression of passion between two people. It's not about performance; it's about expression, about making your partner feel good, about enjoying his or her body to the fullest.

Personally, I almost never orgasm from oral sex, but I still love receiving it. I also really enjoy giving as well--it's such an intimate thing, I'm good at it, and I love the reactions I get from a partner when I go down on him. C*cks are the perfect size and shape to fit in mouths, IMO.

In my experience, people (particularly women) who share your view grew up being told that sex was "dirty" and so were genitals. I know more than one woman who didn't like oral sex and finally learned to relax and love it, once she got over the idea that her partner was doing something really unpleasant. Most of the men I know love going down on their partners, and I've only had one partner who didn't really enjoy it. The rest would happily spend hours given the option.

As to culturally, I'm fairly confident people have been having oral sex since they've been kissing. Possibly not the majority--there were some serious hygiene concerns before bathing became very prevalent--but there have always been people who loved breaking taboos. It was taboo during the Roman times, which means people were doing it then or it wouldn't have been an issue at all.

From the oral sex wiki page: "Oral sex had been considered to be a taboo or at least frowned upon in many cultures and parts of the world.[8] Reasons mentioned are that this sexual act does not lead to procreation, or that it is a humiliating and/or unclean practice (an opinion that is, at least in some cases, connected with the symbolism attached to different parts of the body). This has been more or less the case in Christian and Sub-Saharan African cultures, in Ancient Rome, and Ancient India. Similar lines of reasoning have been espoused by some modern religious authorities in Islamic cultures."

This means oral sex was practiced in all these societies, or it wouldn't have been something to be brought up at all. Nobody bothers to frown upon things that nobody actually does. It may have been practiced by a smaller minority of people in these places (or then again, maybe not; notice the taboo of heterosexual anal sex, yet more couples do that than popular media would have us believe), but it was definitely practiced then.

OP, some people just don't like oral sex, and that's okay. However, the fact that you make sure a big deal of how gross you think it is leads me to think that 1) this is an internal hang-up you could work on if you are so inclined, 2) it stems from an underlying belief about the dirtiness of sex and genitals in general, and 3) it bothers you that you think this in discrepancy to how the majority of us view oral sex, or else you wouldn't have bothered posting here about it. I realize I could be mistaken about one or all of those things, but just something to think about regardless.
 namrael
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 45
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/16/2009 9:51:34 AM

It is obvious you disagree with me, and I am sure there are others that will also - but I simply feel that not respecting another persons boundaries/choices or preferences is immature and quite frankly rude.


Yes, very much so. That's part of what would make a "no oral sex" boundary a deal-breaker for me. If I'm in a relationship, I take that commitment seriously, and I will honor it. In a relationship with oral sex off the menu, that means no oral sex for me at all. I'm not willing to do that.

I find oral sex extremely intimate, both giving and receiving, and I can't imagine not being able to share that intimacy with my partner. I've also been with someone who didn't like going down on me (or anyone, really), and it adversely affected me; made me feel that there was something wrong with me, that he didn't enjoy my p*ssy, all of that. I know from experience how it affects me to have a partner unwilling to go there, and I know I don't want to have that experience again.

How do I deal with this? By not dating people who don't enjoy oral sex. If we know there's that fundamental sexual incompatibility, then we know we're better off sexually with other people. Hence, the deal-breaker status. Nobody's disrespecting anyone's boundaries by making a deal-breaker of it, and we can all find someone whose desires mesh better with our own.
 GreenEyesGoldenLocks
Joined: 6/10/2008
Msg: 46
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/16/2009 10:41:03 AM
I have been with guys who dont care for receiving .. for the most part that means they dont give either. for me that takes away from the experience.. I am sorry but there is more than one kind of O and if you limit it then things are just so so .
 Truth1ness
Joined: 8/2/2009
Msg: 47
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/16/2009 10:56:51 AM
I think everyone is failing to realise that the OP and the guy blow her...oh I’m sorry, where did that come from...let me try that again...the OP and the guy BELOW her have just gone on their first date, I think we should be happy for them! The two people who FEQUENTLY show distain for almost anything sexual have found one another...I think it’s magical!

Now if it were only still legal to sedate and freeze them to study why they have such curious feelings and wants...we could donate them to science fiction.





Truth...I can eat my way out of any argument.
 crystal_light1111
Joined: 8/10/2009
Msg: 48
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/16/2009 12:25:01 PM
Even though I know this will probably show up on my profile, I can't resist commenting on this......anyone (in my view ) who has an aversion to it, has some deep sexuality issues, either cultural or within themselves....Personally, if it wasn't in the equation, it would be a total deal breaker for me....
 lovemesomemen
Joined: 7/14/2009
Msg: 49
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/16/2009 12:45:21 PM

anyone (in my view ) who has an aversion to it, has some deep sexuality issues, either cultural or within themselves


Anyone (in my view) who believes this....has some serious mental issues and should seek out a professional.
 crystal_light1111
Joined: 8/10/2009
Msg: 50
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/16/2009 1:00:00 PM
anyone (in my view) who thinks that a person is mentally ill because he or she enjoys oral sex, is most likely mentally ill ....I take it you don't go there...you're missing out on a lot (-:
 lovemesomemen
Joined: 7/14/2009
Msg: 51
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/16/2009 1:04:28 PM
anyone (in my view) who thinks someone is mentall ill because the person doesn't think like them must not like people very much.


I'm not missing out on anything. I've given it a try many times. I have no hang ups about it. It has nothing to do with how I was raised. Something people seem to miss...some people just don't like it. Not sure why people can't seem to wrap their head around that.
 Scratch off
Joined: 7/5/2009
Msg: 52
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/16/2009 1:08:37 PM
OP don't sweat it so hard. Just don't ever do anything you don't wanna do or expect anything you're not willing to give. But keep in mind that at your age the person you were three or four years ago is drastically different than who you are now. The person you are at 30 will be drastically different from who you are now.


but as far as this:


Sex out of wed lock is a sin according to the church


I hear a lot of people say this, especially Christians who just got "saved" and are now paranoid Bible thumpers.

But if this is the case, how did people reproduce before marriage was invented?
 crystal_light1111
Joined: 8/10/2009
Msg: 53
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/16/2009 1:22:22 PM
I'm not quite certain how you came to the conclusion that I don't like people...I have an associates degree in Psychology, especially with sexual issues, and have learned a few things along the way , especially with respect to sexuality....don't be so defensive hun...never said I don't like people...in fact I love everyone in a humanitarian sort of way (-:
 lovemesomemen
Joined: 7/14/2009
Msg: 54
A question about Oral sex
Posted: 8/16/2009 1:23:46 PM
Except those who don't like the same things you do. You're the one who said something must be wrong with the person if they don't like oral sex. Not true. You can have as many degrees as you want (I have several too....gasp!) but if someone doesn't like something, it's because THEY DON'T LIKE IT.

I LOVE when someone has no true arguement they accuse someone of being bitter. I can say the same about you. You should get some serious help sweetie.
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