Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > sex on the first date      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Farkis McSwifflebum
Joined: 6/14/2006
Msg: 42
sex on the first datePage 11 of 12    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12)
I've never had first-date sex. Not that I'm opposed to it; I'd do it, but only with the right person. And by "right person" I don't just mean anyone who is willing. There's lots to consider here.

You need to get a feel for if the person is sane or not. If they are clearly insane, it might be a good idea to wait until date 2 or 3.

Are you attracted to this person? Let's face it, there are few things worse than having sex with someone you find repulsive. Oh, how I wish I didn't know that. Trust me, don't do it.

Will sex on the first date doom the relationship? Well something is bound to doom the relationship sooner or later, so it might as well be something cool like that.
 Tarika
Joined: 8/30/2006
Msg: 43
sex on the first date
Posted: 1/31/2007 4:01:13 PM
Now, seriously what do you think op?
 dandydan45
Joined: 9/24/2006
Msg: 44
view profile
History
sex on the first date
Posted: 1/31/2007 4:32:32 PM
Im torn on this. I guess I am like most guys just a hound dog at heart. But we want to show respect and look for that SPECIAL connection. Most 1st dates I never try and get too emotionally attached. Deep down inside we get that crushed feeling when it just seems to fizzle. Why complicate things too early. Besides the 1st time with a new mate should be special for if it turns out to be the one - and you never know. It will live in your heart forever.
 XXUnsocialGirlXX
Joined: 1/25/2007
Msg: 45
sex on the first date
Posted: 1/31/2007 5:08:22 PM
I had sex with one of my ex boyfriends on the first night and ended dating for a month and a half I believe.
 kikilynn
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 46
sex on the first date
Posted: 2/2/2007 8:22:31 PM
If any of our relationships stemming from sex on the first date had really "worked", would any of us be here???

Hummmmm....

But, I have had relationships out of sex on the first date, yes.
 PC2000
Joined: 2/26/2007
Msg: 47
view profile
History
sex on the first date
Posted: 3/27/2007 7:17:50 PM
Yes, I had SEXational sex on the first date and the relation lasted over seven years.

PC2000
 call me J
Joined: 12/13/2005
Msg: 48
sex on the first date
Posted: 3/27/2007 9:52:12 PM

Yes, I had SEXational sex on the first date and the relation lasted over seven years.




yeah, but now it has ended. Again, my theory is confirmed.


yeah, because people who waited longer before having sex never break up, right ?
*insert eye rolling smiley here*

I agree with Crazycurlz *droolz*
 call me J
Joined: 12/13/2005
Msg: 49
sex on the first date
Posted: 3/27/2007 10:39:26 PM

aww isn't that cute...Dominate_It called me a whore. a mature reaction to an opinion that disagrees with his own. it might bother me if i was 4 and let names hurt me. good try and thanks for playing ; )


Crazycurlz, you know you're the one that's right in a debate when the other party is name calling...

There is no relationship plan or rule that fits everyone. For some people sex right away is a great choice, for others it's not, but to call a person names because they chose differently than you did is just childish. Some people probably need to spend more time focusing on their own shortcomings than trying to see ones in others...
 call me J
Joined: 12/13/2005
Msg: 50
sex on the first date
Posted: 3/28/2007 3:04:31 PM

you're taking it all much too personally and completely missing my point.
I'm not insulting anyone.
I'm merely stating what my experience/preference has been/is.
The only reason anyone would have any reason to get upset and start bickering about anything is if she felt guilty or trashy.
Not my problem.


No, the reason for anyone to get upset is because your statements were ignorant and rude. Being a jerk, then trying to make it seem as if those you insulted were in the wrong simply because they don't enjoy being insulted, is incredibly spineless on your part.
 jg65
Joined: 8/10/2007
Msg: 51
sex on the first date
Posted: 8/28/2007 10:22:31 PM
both of my ltr (one 7 yrs, the other 8 yrs)
were started that way
on the other hand went out with one girl for 6 months and not so much as a hug
go figure....
 Tom686
Joined: 9/21/2007
Msg: 52
sex on the first date
Posted: 10/15/2007 6:46:49 AM
I think its better to have sex before first,,,,,,that way if you have a first date you most likely will have sex or might not have a first date then theres not reason to see if your going to have sex on your first date with someone.
 Monty_Python_007
Joined: 10/15/2007
Msg: 53
sex on the first date
Posted: 10/22/2007 12:25:59 AM
Yes. We were together 23 years, married 20 of those years & though now divorced, remain the very best of friends.
 fancynanci
Joined: 8/21/2007
Msg: 54
view profile
History
sex on the first date
Posted: 1/11/2008 10:58:35 AM
Sex on the first date is just................................STUPID
 Blonde_charm
Joined: 9/18/2007
Msg: 55
sex on the first date
Posted: 1/12/2008 11:25:34 AM
Yes I sure have.....

But the men I have settled into very long term with, no.
 Arcticfox04
Joined: 3/25/2008
Msg: 56
sex on the first date
Posted: 4/1/2008 7:55:49 PM
You learn so much about someone from internet dating sites that the 1st date seems like the 2nd or 3rd.
 Love_on_Fire
Joined: 11/18/2007
Msg: 57
view profile
History
sex on the first date
Posted: 4/3/2008 3:35:58 PM
I don't think I would. I mean unless I really got to know someone very well before the date and we got along very well and liked eachother to the point where it can happen. I am open minded, but there needs to be that comfortability with the person first. But I will say this, I would much rather have sex on a first date then judge (falsily) someone over trivial things that are immature to judge others over, such as the car they drive, how they do their hair, how much make-up they have on, or what brand or type of dress/clothes are they wearing etc.
 simpleman20188
Joined: 8/11/2007
Msg: 58
sex on the first date
Posted: 4/4/2008 8:12:49 PM

That is so cute and wussy , I almost have to go cuddle a kitten

I was thinking a club and a bunch of baby seals was the only thing that would balance the ying and yang.

lots of baby seals.
 smiles0527
Joined: 6/20/2006
Msg: 59
view profile
History
sex on the first date
Posted: 4/4/2008 10:43:41 PM
I have had sex on a first date but it has been with someone that I have already established a relationship with for some time through weeks of speaking on the phone and/or computer "chats". Must admit that a connection and chemistry was there for both of us. If I met a man that I REALLY want to pursuit a relationship with (for the future) I think it would be best to not let sex get in the way. Therefore, I would try to hold out for a longer period. Thank goodness that I live in a time that woman can make whatever decisions they want! Its also great to be in my 40's and not care what others think so much!
 smiles0527
Joined: 6/20/2006
Msg: 60
view profile
History
sex on the first date
Posted: 4/5/2008 10:01:37 PM
lady bugg, what I meant was that if you have sex with someone right away and then build a relationship with that person, the new and exciting (assuming it is) sex will cloud everything else and can cause someone to stay in a relationship longer than they otherwise would due to the sex. Hope that makes more sense to you. Thanks for askind for some clarity.
 smiles0527
Joined: 6/20/2006
Msg: 61
view profile
History
sex on the first date
Posted: 4/6/2008 8:23:35 PM
Liked your breakdown of the events! Sounds like you've had some fun but not the "right" woman for long term. Did you think differently of the women after the "encounters" honesty please.............
 Boricua Papi
Joined: 10/8/2007
Msg: 62
sex on the first date
Posted: 6/3/2008 7:08:01 AM
Sex on the first date depends on the chemistry.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 63
sex on the first date
Posted: 6/15/2008 6:36:14 AM
Some men are still living in the old age of "if she sleeps with me she is sleeping with everyman on the first date" , which may or many not be true. So sad that this double standard still exists, she might be thinking the same thing about the man,may not be thinking that at all, may just find him attractive and is horny, might actually like him as a person too and wants to see if they have sexual chemistry(gee, women also like sex and if it is not good we might not want to persue anything except friendship --sound familiar?) I know I am only going to be in a sexual relationship where the sex is awesome and we are both into pleasing each other.
 spacecoastman
Joined: 12/21/2006
Msg: 64
sex on the first date
Posted: 7/10/2008 10:25:01 AM
I have read this entire thread. Everyone has a valid opinion. My experience.....my second wife and I had sex on the first date, the date lasted for 4 days. We were married and still had amazing sex unitl she got sick and passed on. If it works for you, it does, if it does not, it doesn't. I believe that the on line dating thing is a great way to get to know someone by taking your time and not rushing into anything. The only thing that is left is chemistry! It is either there, or its not.
 BaldyisBeautiful
Joined: 3/28/2008
Msg: 65
sex on the first date
Posted: 7/10/2008 2:29:16 PM
Yes, and I really miss her
 deerdog1
Joined: 12/29/2006
Msg: 66
sex on the first date
Posted: 7/11/2008 5:35:15 AM
It is my opinion that any man that would have sex on the first date or any other time ...and put down /label the woman for doing the same... is the lowest form of life on this planet ...and that would be the hypocrite...A hypocrite is lower than ,a whore ,a slut,a prostitute,a dog and a snake ....hypocrisy is the ultimate in dishonesty ...it means you cant even be honest with yourself .. .if she shagged you on the first date and she is a slut then you are a slut ...cant have it both ways ...if she has no morels then you have no morels .....yes i have slept with women on the first date ...but Only if i was interested enough that I was going to ask for more dates ...and sex only strengthened that

guys say oh if she will sleep with me on the first date she will sleep with anyone ...well weve already established that you will sleep with anyone ..now we have established that you think your self to be no better than anyone ....if a woman could not resist sleeping with me ,it would make me think that i was irresistible to her in some way..but thats just me I look for ways to value myself ...but then im not one of these self proclaimed sluts just because i have had sex on the first date

guys can you not say "maybe it would be better if we cooled down a bit and waited till we know each other better ..if that is what you think..why is it on her shoulders to stop to control both her and your hormones ...why is she not allowed a weak moment ...guys Grow the f**k up...guys will say and do anything to get in her pants and then blame her ...these guys make me sick ...ashamed to be a guy ...guys take some responsibility ,think with the head that has ears on it ...you complain that women are hung up sexually and you go around perpetuating their hangups ...you want them to be sexual and condemn them when they do ...and like the little brat in the sand box who wants all the toys and gets mad cause the other kids wont play with him ...they dont have enough sense to quit playing with the ones that dont play fair

im sorry if this rant offends anyone ..but sometimes enough is enough
Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > sex on the first date