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Show ALL Forums  > Over 30  > At what age do you Just Give Up?      Home login  
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 funnygingergirl
Joined: 8/13/2012
Msg: 595
At what age do you Just Give Up?Page 25 of 38    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38)
Agreed. Real women "give up" on men that set unrealistic expectations.
 wildlifelover79
Joined: 8/15/2012
Msg: 596
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 11/18/2012 7:42:21 AM
I agree most women live in a fantasy world where guys have to be a doctor,lawyer, or some highly paid worker before they would marry them. Plus let's not forget they are just like men and want the guys with muscles and good looks. It is one of the main reasons why I don't date anymore. I am not going to workout in a gym or get a facelift to change my appearance. If a woman can't accept me for working in a supermarket then so be it.
 wildlifelover79
Joined: 8/15/2012
Msg: 597
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 11/18/2012 8:57:55 AM
Women just have to have those guys that are wild and break the law. The guys that have tattoos and piercings that go to bars and clubs all the time. While guys that don't do any of that are stuck with no women.
 Fleuron
Joined: 8/18/2010
Msg: 598
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 11/18/2012 11:58:21 AM

Btw: As for tattoos, some of the sweetest& polite guys I know (who are married) have them, so they don't make a bad boy. Just saying =)


Agreed. I’ve known lots of great guys with tats….including a doctor who rides a Norton. Don’t think he’s an ex-con, though. ;)


agree most women live in a fantasy world where guys have to be a doctor,lawyer, or some highly paid worker before they would marry them.


Um, it’s not exactly a ‘fantasy’ to date educated, successful men. I’ve dated doctors…worked with lawyers in many capacities over the years, and guess what? They’re no different than any other man. Didn’t you watch “Fight Club”? ;)

I don’t want a criminal, even if he is a doctor. ;)

However you’re right about the muscles. Who the heck WOULDN’T want a muscular, fit man??!! Pick up some weights…you too can have them.

Don’t allow yourself to be intimidated by men you perceive have it over you. They don’t.
Nobody is better…they’re just different.

Your perception is your reality. Why not do yourself a favor and change it?
 liftnw8z
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 599
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 11/18/2012 6:48:23 PM

Agreed. Real women "give up" on men that set unrealistic expectations.


I gotta comment on this post in particular, given a recent email I got through the site. I tend to be pretty specific about my preferences because I know what I want. But the email said "perhaps you're the one who's high maintenance with your specific preferences...". So, is it now that because I have preferences and am not willing to run out and meet/date just anyone who sends me an email that I am setting unrealistic expectations?

Mind you, when I read her profile: a big long series of "MUST" items that would discard an email if you didn't meet every single item, most of which are pretty "elitist" that only a fraction of men, if any, would meet. So she's slapping me with "unrealistic expectations and high maintenance" labels when she is doing the same exact thing, but that's ok for her?

The games people play, just to have a partner. Is it no wonder....?
 Fleuron
Joined: 8/18/2010
Msg: 600
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 11/19/2012 9:50:52 AM

No intimidation here..I call it like i see it in the real world.My dad work for the Departmant of corrections in N.C...The stories he told..OH!!Do not forget Scott Peterson(The baby killer).He only had 100,000 women write him the first week he was in prison..This is documented..And of course you have your life experences and i have mine....I have yet to see in my lifetime of 46 years see Mr.drama king(jailbird,drunk,bum,drug dealer,deadbeat) be single..As far as tats..Go for it!!!What ever float your boat..Here in FL. 90% of men have the same stupid tattoo on the back of there leg,But they are kool and different..What in the hell does being muscular have to do being good or bad...there are good and bad people of all sizes..Sorry i can not change my experiences..That is my reality..I can not change my past..What i see with my eyes is not lies..That is the way it is..And again..What you have experience and what i experience are two different things..


Yep, we’ve all experienced different things…..good and bad. It’s how people CHOOSE to REACT to life experiences that makes the real difference.

Sorry, I’m a bit skeptical of your claim that you’ve yet to see jailbirds, drunks, bums, drug dealers and deadbeats be single. How would you know these situations about anyone, let alone know their romantic relationship status? That’s ridiculous.

90% of the men in Florida have the same stupid tattoo? Hm. You got a link to this info, or have you actually seen every single man in Florida and tallied how many of them have this tat? And I’ll ask you what you asked me about men with muscles….what the hell does that have to do with being good or bad?

Msg. 916 mentions “…guys with muscles and good looks.”

I live about twenty minutes from one of the most infamous prisons in the US. I’ve dated a prison guard. Whoopty do. It’s no secret that some people are f ucked in the head….even some on PoF.

Do you really want to date prison groupies who go for convicted murderers like Scott Peterson, Kenny Bianchi, Richard Ramirez, etc.? It’s the NOTORIETY mentally and emotionally unstable women are attracted to. Do a little serious research, rather than make misinformed assumptions. Why would you want a disturbed woman like that? Something whacked out better than nothing?

Look…..nobody can change the past. YOU are in control of your future. What you tell yourself is your reality. That’s your perception. WHY deliberately choose to fill your head with negativity that only hurts you? I don’t get it.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 601
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 11/19/2012 10:17:36 AM
About all this talk about women only going for criminals, drug users, in particular the comment about the godly woman whose husband is in jail...I guess I could understand the derision if she was advertising herself as available for dating. But we DO have people who come to PoF looking for platonic friends/activity partners, and for the forums, who are married or in relationships and they take steps to make it clear they are not looking for dating.

But, with that said, there are still a lot of women who have an overdeveloped/misguided sense of compassion when it comes to getting involved with troubled men. There are also lots of women who have grown up believing that bragging,bullying,violence are traits of "real" men. If these are the women you are drawn to, but you have no situation that inspires their compassion, or traits that they mistakenly believe define "real men", then perhaps the problem is YOU. Perhaps you need to retrain yourself to look for women who are emotionally healthy, women who know what truly defines a "real man", women who have compassion but direct it so as to not get caught up in bad situations. But-the problem here IS that these women are, as well as being emotionally healthy, are often quite self-contained and are looking for relationships of mutual chemistry and shared values and visions. They won't date just to be dating, they won't be with someone just to avoid being alone, they don't have some weakness or exploitable situation( even if the exploitation is of the most noble intentions!), so they are often a bit more difficult to get with.
Lets' face it, (with due honor given to women who "stand by their man" in certain circumstances) women who have no standards,the ones that willingly date ex-cons, druggies, bullies,jerks, broke-ass losers-must seem like they would be very easy to date. And of course they are for the men that they mistakenly perceive as "real men". But the women who KNOW a genuine real man when they see one, are generally REAL WOMEN. And they are emotionally healthy enough to look PAST the external symptoms of "being a real man"( having a good job, being a good citizen, having a decent home) to look for the honesty, the solid values, the kindness and compassion that are the TRUE hallmarks.
I don't care how good a job a man has, or how nice his house is...if he's mad at the world, or he's angry at all women, if he's selfish, petty, or still stuck in some long-ago emotional trauma, I'm not interested. I think most emotionally healthy women aren't. And the emotionally unhealthy women are the ones attracted to the so-called "badasses".

As for what age one gives up??? Why give up?
There is nothing wrong with taking a break, re-focusing your energies, letting other things come up to a higher level of priority in your life...why completely give up? Seems to me that would take a lot of color out of a persons' rainbow, to "just give up".
Cindy O
 Fleuron
Joined: 8/18/2010
Msg: 602
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 11/19/2012 1:29:15 PM
^^^^^ I’m not gonna try to decipher that mess.


And i have seen these same women have good wholesome men around them,But would not give them the time of day..Then when the first loser comes from the parole office she rolls out the red caepet for this winner.. I get so sick of the games too..I just wish they would be more honest in what kind of man women want..To be honest i am way gone before that train wreck..I just feel sorry for men that are 20 years younger than me..They do not know how to avoid such rubbish..All you have to do is listen,If all they do is talk about are all the jailbirds that they have dated..OR SO AND SO never had a car,But still had a relationship with him.


Where are you trolling for women, that they all want losers? “Good wholesome men,” give me a frigging break! I can see it now….John-Boy Walton eating an apple on white bread on one side, Charles Manson biting the heads off puppies on the other.

“Hey, baby, I’ve never ripped the bowels out of any woman, or slit anyone’s throat, promise. Let’s get it on.”

If all you have to offer women is a claim that you’re NOT a sexual sadist serial murderer, maybe it’s time to consider some self improvement, eh? Or at least quit trying to pick up dates at the meth clinic.

It doesn’t matter to me if you choose to crap on the rest of your life.
Self improvement is sooooo haaaaaarrrrrrrdddddd……

Moving on…..

ladyc4:
As for what age one gives up??? Why give up?


ladyc4:
I don't care how good a job a man has, or how nice his house is...if he's mad at the world, or he's angry at all women, if he's selfish, petty, or still stuck in some long-ago emotional trauma, I'm not interested.


Maybe THIS is why.

If a man is messed up in any way, I think he should keep it to himself, rather than inflicting his angst and f ucked-upness on unsuspecting women.

I don’t want the responsibility of trying to fix any man. If a man can’t be bothered to fix himself, why should anybody else care???

I think men (and women) like that should go ahead and give up.
 wo12345
Joined: 9/12/2011
Msg: 603
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 11/19/2012 4:01:26 PM
Yes, I do look like a troll :(
 4simba
Joined: 10/16/2012
Msg: 604
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 11/20/2012 6:59:56 PM
Thought has crossed my mind several times too. several years ago, a male colleagues told me that I was so picky that I would find myself bringing up my kids with pension. Looking back, now, I fear this and ask, do you throw away your values and who you are so as to just belong or claim to be in a relationship or marriage?
 mozartfuldodger
Joined: 4/28/2009
Msg: 605
view profile
History
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 11/22/2012 6:36:30 PM
80! Tell him hes awesome for me.
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 606
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 11/22/2012 7:32:52 PM
I do see this type of thing often. I do wonder what the hell these women see in these guys. This one woman I know is a straight shooter to the point she doesn't smoke or drink ever. Yet has a husband that that does all of the above constantly. In and out of jail non-stop. Tattoos all over even on his face. Wouldn't be a shocker if she caught the guy shooting up in the living room. I just don't get the attraction.


Assumed assured moral superiority.

They'll never be the one people speak worst of.
 kineticracer
Joined: 8/28/2012
Msg: 607
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 11/23/2012 12:16:46 PM
This is what overseas dating services are made for. I am also in this situation (pushing 40) I'm 35 and In 5 more years I will give up on American women and find my Russian Bride in her 20's who's ready for marriage, Kids, and family here in the good ol' USA. American women dont know what they want anymore.
 Deadliest_Snatch
Joined: 10/25/2012
Msg: 608
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 11/24/2012 7:23:47 AM

This is what overseas dating services are made for. I am also in this situation (pushing 40) I'm 35 and In 5 more years I will give up on American women and find my Russian Bride in her 20's who's ready for marriage, Kids, and family here in the good ol' USA. American women dont know what they want anymore.


Well, at least it appears they know what they DON'T want!
 wildlifelover79
Joined: 8/15/2012
Msg: 609
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 11/24/2012 10:30:22 AM
Wouldn't trust overseas brides or dating! Could be a man acting like a woman trying to say they need so much money to come see you for the airplane ticket and actually take your money or identity.
 Anton0133
Joined: 11/25/2012
Msg: 610
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 12/3/2012 4:09:53 AM
I think giving up at 40 is the right age to exit the game.

I'm 40, been single 13yrs. And as of midnight 31st Dec 2012, I retire completely from attempting to date and find love.

At that point you have to concede that you are undatable and your window of opportunity has since passed.

Oh, we'll. it just means I can go fishin more and worry less.
 Fleuron
Joined: 8/18/2010
Msg: 611
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 12/3/2012 12:20:53 PM
^^^^^ Oh, crap….I’m eight years too late. Where’d I leave that cyanide capsule?

Anton0133, I hope your midnight castration procedure goes well. What a great centerpiece for the coffee table!
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 612
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 12/3/2012 1:24:43 PM

What a great centerpiece for the coffee table!

I wonder, could he get that bronzed, like people used to have done to their kids baby shoes?? Or maybe take it to a taxidermist, have it stuffed and mounted? Maybe have it embalmed?
'Cause otherwise-its' gonna start to rot-and stink....
Cindy O
 Anton0133
Joined: 11/25/2012
Msg: 613
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 12/3/2012 3:12:38 PM
Nah going to put it straight in the trash. I don't want any reminders of my failure to meet women.
 Fleuron
Joined: 8/18/2010
Msg: 614
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 12/3/2012 5:15:42 PM

I wonder, could he get that bronzed, like people used to have done to their kids baby shoes?? Or maybe take it to a taxidermist, have it stuffed and mounted? Maybe have it embalmed?
'Cause otherwise-its' gonna start to rot-and stink....


Very nice, ladyc4!

I had originally envisioned a sort of glass vase with perhaps a fancy type stopper, filled with simple formaldehyde.

But I really like the bronzing idea, it could be mounted on a nice mahogany or cherry wood base…oh, I do like that!

Stuffed and mounted…. A bit Norman Bates-ish, but definitely a real conversation starter. And I imagine that option might be appealing as he could probably request that it be a bit “over” stuffed, if you get my drift. ;)

If it was embalmed maybe he could get some little outfits for it and dress it up for special occasions…a little Santa suit, a bunny suit for Easter, a long beard and tiny yamaka for Hanukkah …the fun possibilities are endless! :)

Anton0133, if you thought a bit more creatively, maybe you wouldn’t be such a poopy head. :)
 Anton0133
Joined: 11/25/2012
Msg: 615
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 12/3/2012 5:30:43 PM
Haha, poopy head!
Hey I failed, and that's ok. I tried my best and nothing ever came of that. But that's ok because I gave it a real good shot.
I can now move on to the next phase of my life with no regrets.

Poopy head, nice one! Lol
 jpwrnglrwmn_forumsonly
Joined: 4/23/2011
Msg: 616
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 12/3/2012 6:54:56 PM
In response to the original posting. .at what age does one give up? I would say when you attract more undesirables (ie. ones who are too much older, or out of shape, or ones you're just not attracted to) than desirables. It's not that I think highly of myself. .it's just I refuse to date someone I'm not attracted to.
 billingsmason
Joined: 2/3/2012
Msg: 617
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 12/3/2012 9:05:32 PM
think I'll be fighting till they unplug me...
 audit44
Joined: 7/14/2012
Msg: 618
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 12/4/2012 10:01:09 AM

I would say when you attract more undesirables (ie. ones who are too much older, or out of shape, or ones you're just not attracted to) than desirables. It's not that I think highly of myself. .it's just I refuse to date someone I'm not attracted to.


For some reason that's all I've been attracting are ones that are out of shape, want a baby daddy, or don't even bother reading my profile and what my interests are. I swear that half the time, it's bots that are sending me messages because they are damn near written the same. I'm not looking for a super model, (I do like a little meat on the bones) but I'm also not attracted to someone who either is unable to work out and stay in shape, or refuses to. I don't just limit myself to online either, in social settings it's worse. If I drive my Mercedes and women see me leaving it with the valet, then I'm getting women that are just looking for wrong things, if I drive my Ford Fussion and nobody pays any attention to it because it's not an $80k car then I'm lucky if I talk to more then just the bartender or the DJ that night.

I've just come to terms that if it's ment to happen then someone will come into my life that's good for me and I'm good for her, until then I'll just sit back and live my life with my kids until they move out. No sense in pushing out 25 messages a day on here and don't get a response, going to the bar's, theaters, ball games, etc with a hope of meeting someone as it's just too much of a game for women now, they have the advantage and they know it. (No that's not an insult to any women that reads it, it's true that the numbers are against the guys, some of us just see it and accept it)
 warriorprincess1
Joined: 9/12/2011
Msg: 619
At what age do you Just Give Up?
Posted: 12/5/2012 2:10:18 PM
My parents met when my dad was 40 and didn't end up having me until he was 47, and he was turning 50 when my little brother was born. He has been a wonderful parent and if you really want kids, don't give up.
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