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Show ALL Forums  > Single Parents  > Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?      Home login  
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 venomac1
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 126
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Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?Page 6 of 22    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22)
I know posting in this thread is probably not a great idea, but what the heck.

I remember back when I was younger(18 years old), I slept with a woman 10 years older than me and she "STATED" that she had gotten pregnant(she was my first). She told me she was getting an abortion. I was DEAD SET against that, didn't and don't believe in it except for medical reasons. But she went and done it anyways (supposedly), against my wishes and then she just disappeared from my life after I had asked her to marry me(poof, gone). The MAIN problem with this thread is everyone is looking at this issue from their own personal point of view without taking the other genders thoughts into consideration. The simple FACT with this issue is men are COMPLETELY taken out of the decision making process. Many women on here have said they are included, but they are ONLY included if they want what you want. I cringe to ask how many women on here would like it if the government took the decision out of their hands and FORCED you to have an abortion if THEY wanted you to OR FORCED you to have a baby you didn't want to have???? The simple "FACT" is the same thing is done to most(not all)men by most(not all) women when a dispute like this happens. I have seen men that wanted to have and take care of the child and women just up and kill a child, just like my first did to my child(if she truely was pregnant with my child, like I said, she took off), but that decision was taken from me. There are just as many men out there that would happily raise their child on their own after it was conceived and just as many women willing to completely ignore the wishes of the other parent just because they do not mesh with their's. I understand it is the woman that has to carry the child, and ultimately has the final decision, but no one has any right to complain about the other when it is both sides screwing up. Accidents do happen, the woman can be on birth control AND the man can wear a condom and by a weird freak of nature EVERYTHING go wrong(condom breaks or BC doesn't work or both), she gets pregnant. In the end the man's voice on weather the child should be born is going to amount to nothing unless they are in a relationship, so I can see both sides. This thread just turned into a reason to think men are scum thread and lost all constructive reasoning IMHO.

Simple fact is accidents do happen, and there are some that are not accidents, and any man not wearing protection before marriage no matter if the woman says she is on birth control are not is a fool and deserves her scorn. But there are just as many women that lie about birth control and that is just as deceptive IMHO. Be adults, be honest, be safe. That is all anyone can do and calling men scum for resenting being taken out of the decision making process is just as dishonorable as a man running away from his responsibilities IMHO.

*runs into my flame proof shelter*
 BrockLee74
Joined: 9/9/2011
Msg: 127
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 2/28/2012 11:21:34 PM
Men stay. Boys run.
 5150Rivergirl
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 128
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 2/29/2012 12:19:09 PM

n the end the man's voice on weather the child should be born is going to amount to nothing unless they are in a relationship,


When a man has the ability to get pregnant and carry the child, thru all the woes of pregnancy, then he can have a say with what happens to his own body.

Fact is, its the womans body who undergoes the pregnancy process. Easy to say you want the baby. You dont have to go thru the physical part.

Back 12 yrs ago, my then bf (who later turned out to be my then husband-now ex husband..lol) and I got preg. by accident. Found out from PP. I was scared to death and unsure if I wanted. A few days I got used to it. 6 months later, lost the baby preterm. Went thru some depression over even thinking back when I found out, I had the option of abortion and was unsure.

What it boils down to, is the womans right to choose what happens to her body. I know for the man, it may be tough to handle, but, thats the way the laws are.
 venomac1
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 129
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Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 2/29/2012 2:29:39 PM
River, thats why I said this.
"I understand it is the woman that has to carry the child, and ultimately has the final decision,"
And what you say is ultimately true, but in my humble opinion you cant get angry with the man if he doesn't want the child and it is FORCED upon him. If it was the other way around and the man wanted the child and the woman did not, there would be fussing about that as well. That's why I said a man ULTIMATELY has no say, so when that is the fact you cant get upset at men "IF IF IF" all precautions were taken and something just went wrong. If the man didn't wear protection, then by all means, men bash to your hearts content.

IMHO people need to take their emotions out of this thread and think, there is nothing constructive left on this thread, it has turned into a bashing thread against men for stating their opinion without considering the merits of said opinions. Tempers have gotten heated from both sides from what I have read here, when that happens all reasoning goes out the window.
 venomac1
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 130
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Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 2/29/2012 3:30:08 PM
Church, I also think you are correct to an extent. I know when me and my wife at the time had our kids(twins), I didn't have a clue to what my wife was going through emotionally at the time. Some days she would be crying the next she would be insanely happy. It didn't even fully set in with me that I was going to be a dad until a few months before she had them and I could feel them moving. Even then I did not want to get my hopes up just in case something went wrong(long story, a lot of fertility treatments). But we were in a relationship and wanted kids. When one doesn't want the child and is basically FORCED to then the problems arrive. NO ONE ever likes to be "forced" into something, women or men.....

All I am saying is, this arguing on this thread I don't think is about a man running away so much as a man getting "forced" into something because someone is going to do what they want weather they like it or not. I asked honestly how would a woman "feel" IF they didn't want the child and the man FORCED her to have it against their wishes if that were possible. Then the title of the post would be "Why do women run at the first sign of pregnacy" LOL But this is one of those "Women are from Venus, Men are from Mars" situations.
 5150Rivergirl
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 131
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 2/29/2012 3:53:16 PM
I read your whole thread, and I know you understand its ultimately the womans decision...


but in my humble opinion you cant get angry with the man if he doesn't want the child and it is FORCED upon him.


I wouldnt get angry, and I would understand, but, in the end, it doesnt matter because there is nothing he can do about it NOW. Why cry over spilled milk? Id be looking at it from the angle of, hey, if you didnt want to get pregnant and father a child/mother a child, then BOTH parties should have covered up before the act of intercourse even happend. You take that risk when you play without thinking of the consequences.



IMHO people need to take their emotions out of this thread


Negative. Not gonna happen. I know this is your opinion, to which you are entitled, however, this IS an emotionally charged situation. Its a life altering experience, and it is hard NOT to let your emotions come into play.


it has turned into a bashing thread against men for stating their opinion without considering the merits of said opinions.


Interesting...
cause I dont see it that way at all. No bashing comming from me. There are a few parties on this thread that have a posting history/beef with some.

In the end, whats done is done. You didnt want to be a parent, cover up your s.hit. Goes for both men AND women.

Personal Sidenote: I just had an initial consultation with my dr today about getting a tubal ligation, scheduled in May. I am a single parent, to 1 miracle child, and for health reasons, I am opting this for me. I do let men I come in contact with, know this so if a relationship occurs, there is no decieving. I am in the beginning stages of dating a man who does not have children, and we have been talking, and he told me he once delivered a baby whose mother he did not feel made it. (he's a fireman). Our conversation turned into this topic.
 5150Rivergirl
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 132
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 2/29/2012 4:06:27 PM

IF they didn't want the child and the man FORCED her to have it against their wishes if that were possible.


How is that even a possible scenerio in your head? I could see ways he would try to FORCE her to not have it, but, TO have it? How does a man force a woman to keep it? Give me some scenerios cause I am trying to wrap my head around situations where you think this could be a possibility?
All she'd have to do is go to a PP when he isnt in her presence. Presumably when she is in the early 1st trimester.
Fear/manipulation that he would harm her if she aborted, so she stays out of fear?
 venomac1
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 133
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Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 2/29/2012 5:08:27 PM
River,
You are picking out "pieces" of what I have posted without taking the whole post into context. I said this
"I asked honestly how would a woman "feel" IF they didn't want the child and the man FORCED her to have it against their wishes if that were possible. " I said IFFFFFF. :P
Mainly because that is what men are being FORCED into doing in "SOME" cases. You all KNOW there are just as many EVIL women out there as there are men.

And I believe I said also that "WHEN" an accident happens and "BOTH" were taking precautions(it does happen you know).
People, lets stop picking out short fractions of the post and take the post in context. That is half of the problem with this thread, either way this will be my last post because this discussion is going nowhere. Peace all ('')
 5150Rivergirl
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 134
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 2/29/2012 7:29:43 PM
Venom,
I am not picking out peices, I am just quoting you from your own words. I acknowledged just about all your points,and even reinstated that I do understand its YOUR opinion. Just because I have a different approach to things and view yours as a bit flawed, does not mean I am starting a bashing war against you.

I know exactly WHAT you were asking and WHAT you were implying with your "what if" scenerio. I even asked you to explain to me what situations could contribute to your "what if scenerio". Again, I stand firm with no man (or woman) can be forced into keeping a pregnancy and/or if they didnt want the child. I addressed your question and even asked for examples you could give, as well as giving my own that would constitute one being forced to keeping if they didnt want to, and vice versa.

There is no problem with this thread. Just a bunch of strangers giving their opinions and their viewpoints, that others happen to agree and disagree. Debating. It seems you are working yourself up over the fact that some dont agree with the way you see it. That is your issue, not the threads for going awry and veering off to a tangent.


this will be my last post


ok. bye!
 QueenBeeSweetness
Joined: 9/23/2011
Msg: 135
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 2/29/2012 8:42:48 PM
Venom, the reason a woman has post-conception choices, is a matter of biology.

Not fair, well, i personally find the idea that men can not gestate for 9 months, along with all the hormonal changes, discomforts, nausea, & swelling, then go through a very painful birthing process, & a traumatic post partum blood loss, "not fair". , When a man can give birth on my behalf, he can then make my post-conception choices.
 5150Rivergirl
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 136
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 2/29/2012 8:54:40 PM

When a man can give birth on my behalf, he can then make my post-conception choices.


 smilingrock
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 137
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 3/12/2012 1:56:30 PM
Someone should Google "reasons not to have a baby". It pretty much covers why guys with a brain think twice...
 cusechick26
Joined: 2/27/2011
Msg: 138
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 3/13/2012 8:22:25 PM
I paid for him to go on vacation with me and my family. I came home pregnant. He told me I'm sorry but I cant afford you and the baby while your unemployed. What else are you supposed to do at that point other than run off to the nearest clinic.
 Tealwood
Joined: 12/16/2008
Msg: 139
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 3/17/2012 7:57:37 AM

I paid for him to go on vacation with me and my family. I came home pregnant. He told me I'm sorry but I cant afford you and the baby while your unemployed. What else are you supposed to do at that point other than run off to the nearest clinic.


Strange but when unemployed and travelling around it seems I never had the "supposed accidents" as I was never seen as a good reliable provider....but one asks where your thought pattern was...where your sense of responsibility was...as a single woman allowing yourself to become pg....with a guy you had to pay for to accompany your parents....while you were also seemingly unemployed?

Or the resident individual who has children from 3 different men who milks all possible government social program to allow herself to work part time while paying for her 2,000 sq foot home in Toronto...one of the more expensive cities in North America...and who suggests she had a pool built in her backyard....


Speaking from personal experience (not that long ago) I think that alot of men who find themselves in the position of dealing with an unexpected and unwanted pregnancy look for the opt out clause too quickly...and for some strange reason...men are more entitled to that choice than women are BECAUSE abortion is a legal option and it is an easy out and a acceptable excuse in todays social structure that excuses men.


What a load of crap…the only one entitled to that choice is the mother. Never yet seen a situation where the father was able to legally require the abortion. So your argument is without merit.


Women on the other hand..cannot run away from their bodies or moral compasses the same way. Make no mistake about it boyz...a woman who chooses to have a child after it has been made clear a man isn't interested does not have an easier choice..in fact it makes it much more difficult.


You make choices in life and then you also have to be accountable for those choices. You need to be responsible for those choices…and when you look at the number of custodial woman who work full time…only 50% you see only half of the woman being financially responsible for themselves and their children…and when one looks at the poverty level for single mothers, I suggest they are themselves making it more difficult for themselves.


It is very easy for a man to negate his responsibility and morals for his past indiscretions yet women are held to the highest of standards when it comes to the same thing.


You will have to explain this one….as plenty of guys are told they have to pay their required child support…they have to be employed full time and are not allowed to work part time..or go to school when there are children that require support…and we have how many woman part time employed or back to school again? High standards are not very high? And there is always adoption….yet woman are funny…they often despise woman who have their children adopted….just like many who despised my ex for not fighting for full custody when I had primary custody. The problem often is woman are afraid of what other woman will think of them. As to high standards…why not look at the default percentages of non custodial mothers which are higher than non custodial fathers and explain how woman are expected to live to a higher standard? They default more…they work less? Seems to not support your premise of the poor mother?



Women become infuriated when they realize they were used and tossed away like a used tissue and that is when the basic human instinct kicks in for women....perhaps men have evolved to the point where they can abandon and ignore their offspring...thank gawd for mankind women still have the maternal instinct in tact.


Really…you do have that poor me…I am a poor victim mentality down well….perhaps one needs to ask…why were they even there in the first place…and realize perhaps the used and thrown aside equally can go both ways..after all with the 50% of custodial mothers not working full time…who is kidding who in respect to using or looking for the meal ticket or the support they are unable to earn themselves. Not everyone is able to work the system as adroitly as you seemingly have..
 mrcs84
Joined: 12/9/2008
Msg: 140
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Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 3/17/2012 7:58:19 AM

I think most men would be better off if they got their first thought right!...no need to think twice when you know the risks??


I'm pretty sure it has less to do with the "risks" and more the idea of how many guys (and girls, really) understand the magnitude of the decision they are making when they choose to have a kid. I know a lot of people who didn't -truly- understand what they were getting themselves into, and how having a child changes all aspects of there lives. Some of conceptions were, "Oops!!! Well, I'm going to keep it," but several others were "We are trying to have a child."


As far as those reason, I'll go ahead and post them:

Twenty other reasons not to have a baby

Compiled by John Hind
The Observer, Saturday 7 February 2009
Article history

1. Childless couples spend 79% more on food for themselves than parents do, and 101% more on dining out.

2. Working mothers have a total of seven hours "me time" per week against almost 17 hours for working non-mothers.

3. In the 12 months after a child is born, sexual activity among average couples drops by more than 40%, with 25% of couples partaking only once a month.

4. 67% of couples report having more arguments in the year after their first child is born.

5. British parents wishing to offset the C02 emissions resulting from bringing one child into the world would need to plant 1,073 trees.

6. Women with babies who work full-time spend just over six hours asleep per night. Even among non-working mothers, 74% say they "rarely get enough sleep".

7. Raising a child from birth to adulthood will cost £140,000. This means the average couple works two years to fund each offspring - couples with children are twice as likely to file for bankruptcy as those without.

8. The aluminium thrown away in a year by British children would be enough to replace all the UK's passenger planes.

9. 60% of mothers say having children caused friendships to be lost.

10. Childless people save on average 37% by being able to travel and take holidays outside school holidays.

11. 70% of mothers say they feel irritation rather than concern when woken by their baby crying.

12. The average child is driven 100 miles per year to/from school. The number travelling to school by car has doubled in 20 years.

13. 96% of women say they are "less pleased" with their vaginas a year after giving birth than before.

14. 12% of divorced women say their child caused the divorce.

15. There are approximately 321 million babies aged under two and a half on the globe. If each of them wore disposable nappies then more than four tonnes would be disposed of every minute.

16. Over seven million nappies are thrown away each day in the UK; three billion in a year.

17. The average teenager will have been given toys worth £11,000. Children break 40% of their toys within three months.

18. Women without children earn on average 95% of what men do, whereas women with children earn 75%.

19. The Optimum Population Forum judges the price of a condom to have had a nine million per cent "return on investment" when set against the cost to the planet of having a child.

20. On average, British parents will have spent £13,359 on holidays for their child before they reach the age of 21.
 QueenBeeSweetness
Joined: 9/23/2011
Msg: 141
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 3/17/2012 12:20:04 PM
^ So dont have any. Some people want children & feel that children are worth it, some dont. If you dont, dont breed. Really simple. And why not go ahead & send your own parents that list?
 mrcs84
Joined: 12/9/2008
Msg: 142
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Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 3/17/2012 4:30:52 PM

^ So dont have any. Some people want children & feel that children are worth it, some dont. If you dont, dont breed. Really simple.

All I was doing was clarifying what was being said. As far as procreating, well, simple as it may seem, there are a lot of "accidental" babies out there. And your statement also completely ignores my comment that there are people who -think- they are ready to have children, but they come to find out that they are in over their heads once the first baby comes.


And why not go ahead & send your own parents that list?

And that would accomplish what?
 gronkrocks
Joined: 12/4/2011
Msg: 143
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 3/17/2012 5:24:31 PM
After reading the title I thought this thread was gonna be about pregnant women dating and why men won't date them. Seriously.

So first of all let me clear this part up:
'Waaah but he got her pregnant it's his responsibility!'
Okay true, but not 100% his. Some guys are tricked into getting a girl pregnant (poking holes in his condoms, lying about b.c., etc.), others are just irresponsible and it happens. But this isn't about how it happens, it's about why guys run.

As far as guys running when their partner tells them they're pregnant, it's simple: They don't want to raise a kid with you.

He has made his choice. Now it's up to the mother to decide, what do I do? I won't get into the politics of it but there's abortion. Better option is adoption, there are lots of couples that want kids and have to wait years to adopt. Or be a single mom.
'Waaah but he just get's to leave no fair!'
He certainly does not. If she aborts then they both have that emotional situation to deal with. If she goes with adoption they both still have an offspring out there, though the woman does have to deal with the pregnancy. If she decides to be a single mom, he is stuck forking lots of $$$ over to her for 18 years.

Hopefully all will learn their lesson and be more frikin careful from now on!
 BoonDockSaint73
Joined: 3/29/2010
Msg: 144
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 3/17/2012 5:55:34 PM
OP - because "technically" as a male mammal...



we've done our part...



we got you pregnant - so we, are off to find someone else to impregnate...
 5150Rivergirl
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 145
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 3/18/2012 11:22:53 AM

You make choices in life and then you also have to be accountable for those choices


This sums it up for both men and women.
'nuff said.
 TKO38
Joined: 3/6/2012
Msg: 146
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 3/19/2012 4:35:28 PM
wow!! alot of comments and not all are that nice. But, honest, so its a catch 22.

Im a single mom because even though I was on the pill we decided not to use a condom 'in the heat of the moment' as people say. When I told him I was pregnant, he quickly told me he cant have kids, he had an accident when he was young which made him sterile. Well then, I have two kids who are the sons of god...lol He was the only man I had been with in over a year. So there is no doubt, and yes, I could go on Maury and not be one of the girls that begs to know... 'wwhhhhyyyy' good lord.

I think a few people here got it completely right, men will leave because they can. But dont lump it as only men, women do the same thing. Give birth and dash. Some people just arent ready to be parents, some people just arent meant to be parents. I did meet one man here who said he knew that early on and 'fixed' that issue right away. Smart guy.

I think it comes down to, if you dont want to get pregnant and possibly end up a single parent, abstinence is your only way. There are all sorts of statistics and numbers to crunch on effectiveness of birth control, but there is only one way to be 100% sure.

As for abortion pushers, nice. I am against abortion as a birthcontrol, again I say then shut your legs, keep your pants zipped up. Abortion in a setting where one or both could die from being pregnant/giving birth is different.
 fish_75
Joined: 8/12/2011
Msg: 147
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 3/20/2012 5:12:52 PM
I have been diagnosed as infertile so while sort of dating someone who I had known for quite some time ( a year) but didn't quite felt a strong connection, I now am pregnant!

It was a big shock at first but then I look at it as a miracle....now he is really not into me or doesnt' want to have anything to do with this baby.

As an infertile person I know how wonderful and amazing it is to have a little angle in life....so why is it that most men walk away and avoid someone in my situation?

I am so excited and dying to find someone who like myself has been unable to have a child and would be open minded to accept and perhaps be part of this baby's life.

Anyway, it is not easy but I am enjoying every day of it and thank my Lord for giving me the chance to have this baby.

What should I do to not feel so lonely and anxtious to have a partner in life while having the baby and raising the baby?? I am all alone here in Canada and have just a few friends.

Thx
 ohwhynot46
Joined: 6/28/2009
Msg: 148
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Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 3/20/2012 6:07:24 PM
The thing to remember is the women has the option of an Abortion if she gets pregnant and doesnt want it. A man doesnt.

Their are massive consequences for a man involved in sex. i cant beleive those people who say their isnt. A child you didnt want and cant choose not to have. Child support for a child you didnt want. Offspring in the world that you never wanted and that may come looking for you knowing that you never wanted them.


You are right, except for...
1) the option does NOT exist for many women. For THOSE WOMEN for whom abortion is not an option, no matter the reason, if they don't want a child, they are responsible to prevent pregnancy.

2)Men DO have a choice, but their choice takes place prior to engaging in activities that may result in a pregnancy. As a man, you remove your pants with prior knowledge that you may be held financially responsible for a child you don't want; thus, you assume the risk AT THAT TIME. If they don't want to risk being responsible for a child, they are then responsible to prevent it from happening.

There should be a direct correlation between the degree of responsibility & the degree to which one does not want a child, no matter whether one is male or female. Rather than argue about the unfairness of it all, can't we see what is simple true & right in front of us? If you don't want a child, it is up to YOU to see that a child is not produced!

The answer to the actual question posed is pretty simple: men who run at the first sign of pregnancy do so because they are unwilling to accept the consequences for their actions. Doesn't change anything, won't solve anything, and varies a bit from person to person as far as being exlpanatory, but the fact remains.
 smilingrock
Joined: 11/9/2008
Msg: 149
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 3/21/2012 1:29:02 PM
Wonder what kind of birth control is being used here? Remember if you are on the pill you need to take it as prescribed.
 gourmetliving
Joined: 7/19/2011
Msg: 150
Why men run at the first sign of pregnancy?
Posted: 4/13/2012 9:42:14 PM
To answer the question to the best of my knowledge/ability



I am a single father.

I was raised by single mother (My father did not know of my existence until a few years ago, even though I was told he walked out before I was born. )


I believe I'm a good candidate to speak on this subject.


Yes, there are many deadbeats out there who ran the second they were told their party life was about to be traded in for diapers. Now, they do have some responsibility in the matter. To make a child takes 2 people and both should assume equal responsibility.


But to this matter, why are women sleeping with these types of guys? Women sleep with douche bags on a regular, and wonder why they are stuck with the child of a nameless man. Women have been the gatekeepers of human reproduction for millenia... but now they changed the gate to a welcome sign. Women: If you want higher quality men to be the rule, not the exception, stop sleeping with the low end males. The rest of us will get that The Situation isn't a great role model as he doesn't get laid anymore. As long as women fall for the jerks, men will continue to be jerks to impress them. That "nice guy" who's shoulder you cry on when you get pumped and dumped, you know, the guy that would stick around to care for a child, would likely be a better candidate for a mate. But, young women are not attracted to nice guys. They like the bad boy, the jailbird, the womaniser.... and wonder why he ran off.... pfffft.
That nice guy sees this, becomes jaded, and learns that in order to even get a woman to acknowledge him these days he needs to become the douche. Once he becomes the douche, he is rewarded by female attraction.
(Girls date bad boys and hope to marry nice guys.)


I also know many guys who are labelled as deadbeats by the kids mom because he only sees the child a few times per month. But I often see these men fight as hard as they can against a biased system to the point they can either go bankrupt of give up their child.

I've also know women who have tricked the men into being fathers. (Some stopped taking the pill due to weight gain and never told the spouse (not a fling, but a 6 year relationship), even though she was on the pill because neither he nor she wanted a child. But HER choice to keep it sent him packing, (do you blame him?)) I know some women who have tried to have a kid to save a failing relationship. This doesn't work.

By the way:
The "it was an accident" thing could have flown in the 50's but not today. With all the BC methods, abortion, etc. etc. etc. there is no reason. (Example: First time i was having sex with this one girl, the condom broke. What did we do? We walked over to the pharmacy and got a morning after pill. And guess what? No child resulted from that interaction. ) If you had sex with a guy, and think there might be a chance your contraception was not effective... it's a cheap, morally acceptable, easy solution.
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