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 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 20
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Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?Page 2 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
There are a lot of women reading this (and more not reading this) who wonder where in the hell are the men who say yes, more often than not, than no when asked out by these women. OP suffers from only thinking/seeing things from his personal experiences, which does not factor in the rest of the human population. It is not about gender, never has been even in the 'good old days' that never were, it's about the individual.
 bikeman1467
Joined: 9/22/2009
Msg: 21
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Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 9/27/2009 9:41:38 AM

Yes without doubt women are pickier, and it's only women who are saying that they aren't...As to why ..... that may well simply be because they are in a position to be pickier
Generally I'd say it's a tie, but I lean toward women as a gender being slightly more choosier, just due to the fact that most of the time it is the woman who controls whether or not a relationship advances. This point can be argued ad infinitum, but this is the reality, folks.
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 22
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Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 9/27/2009 10:01:55 AM
NAaaah, it's all perception on your part. Both men and women dump each other, or date each other, for a bunch of different reasons. The reason given at DUMP time is influenced heavily by the desire to get it over with quickly, so the reasons given by the dumper are often oversimplifications, or even outright false.
From a functional standpoint, it doesn't really matter. Even if you could prove that the difference you imagine existed, it wouldn't change anyone's behavior. So juuuuust move along.
 wings on my butt
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 23
Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 9/27/2009 10:55:10 AM

Hey, just settle for someone you don't want and be happy with it because that **** is too good for you?



The only thing I have to say is everyone wants a bargain but no one wants to be a bargain.
 bucsgirl
Joined: 5/13/2006
Msg: 24
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Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 9/27/2009 10:58:36 AM
They're only too choosy when they don't pick you. Bottom line!
 wings on my butt
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 29
Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 9/27/2009 2:42:12 PM

Well a lot of times you see hot gorgeous women with average-looking guys.



Once in awhile you see hot gorgeous women with ugly guys, and when you do it's almost a guarantee that he has a full bank account. The other times that you see hot gorgeous women with ugly guy is rare and the exception. It is not a lot it is uncommon, so if you are hoping to land a hot gorgeous women good luck with that because unless you make a great deal of money or you meet up with some crazy hot chick with severe self esteem issues then it's not going to happen.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 35
Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 9/28/2009 7:00:51 AM

Once in awhile you see hot gorgeous women with ugly guys, and when you do it's almost a guarantee that he has a full bank account.

AUGH. I get so tired of stereo-typical thinking that goes no deeper than the fluid dripped from a thimble. Some women see beauty in men that other women may not find highly attractive. No different than men viewing women with their OWN eyes.

~ OT ~ I would hope any man that finds me of interest is exceptionally picky. If not? Why on earth would I feel special? JMO
 jacob8088
Joined: 9/6/2009
Msg: 39
Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 9/28/2009 10:42:47 PM
Just look at all of the thread which are started every day by women complaining... "Why doesn't he call!?"

It is a well known thing that men do not always stick around. Again, how many women complain about the men who only wanted to get laid?


^^^Yeah I have seen and read it myself also...one to many times. It's like a broken record playing the same old songs over...and over...and over. Pathetic.
 DD7753
Joined: 11/1/2016
Msg: 41
Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/16/2016 12:48:42 PM
I received messages from men as old as 60... come on men get a clue... I'm 33 and you aren't Hugh Heffner lol = I am just in it for the money
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 42
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Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/18/2016 11:16:41 AM

Which gender do you think is the most picky and choosy, most selective when it comes to Dating and Relationships? Men or Women?

Women are pickier & choosier. ESPECIALLY online where it's a big sausage-fest. But even IRL, that's the case. Culturally, guys go up to girls to initiate flirty mingling/convo that'd open up the door for something. Not necessarily the best of guys doing this, so this puts one in picky mode. And also culturally, women are to Be picky about such things. Guys aren't. But since guys aren't, you'll hear more complaints about a guy willing to fool around but not start Dating.

So in the end, I think gals are more picky about connecting with a guy. It's due to the cultural setup and what they face due to it, and that they're culturally "supposed to" adds fuel to that fire. But once connecting, guys tend to be more picky about getting into a Relationship. :)
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 43
Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/20/2016 9:58:28 AM
With OLD, both genders can be picky about pictures. I think women are often more picky about things including height and income / education level. On Match, users can put the desired traits of their potential date. Many women there want a man that is at the "same level" or higher. Such as woman with a college degree wants a man to also have at least college degree.
 hemingway234
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 44
Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/21/2016 8:29:44 AM
It's not that women are pickier........ they are slower to fall in love....... think slow cookers.

But now that I'm an old man, I'm like a slow-cooker too! And generally just slow.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 45
Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/21/2016 9:03:48 AM
"It's not that women are pickier........ they are slower to fall in love......"

I don't know about that. When I see a woman's profile that says "Looking for someone to marry/Looking for my knight in shining armor to spend the rest of my life with" etc., it sure seems like they're looking for instant love. Dates would be like interviews, and whoever scores higher on the tests and interviews after a few dates will get the honor of being loved. I am guessing women will be more likely to have a list of "must have" requirements more so than men, because men are primarily into physical attractions first, where as women are more into the instant whole package, meaning someone they can fall in love with quickly. Women don't want to waste time with someone they won't fall in love with.
 ebolakitty
Joined: 3/19/2016
Msg: 46
Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/21/2016 9:40:43 AM
Women are not very picky. It only looks that way people that message them because they mistakenly think that they are men. Men are actually pickier because they apply rational standards. The physical attraction people are not men but animals.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 47
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Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/21/2016 12:44:46 PM

It's not that women are pickier........ they are slower to fall in love....... think slow cookers.

I do not think so at all. I think that's when gals get into a gear that guys usually don't: Wanting to be Friends First, which is Usually a waste of time. It's not that they're falling in love during that process -- it's something where they have the Beta male on the side to *possibly* fall into true Like (and get attention & support in the process). But once that true Like hits -- whether it be thru that Odd angle of I'm-not-that-into-you-but-I-go-Friends-First, or hitting it off with someone they first meet -- the Love part usually comes Quicker than the male if he doesn't have a crush on her from the outset.

Online women are pickier, and that has nothing to do with the speed of falling for a set individual. It's the gender ratio + gals less likely to pump-n-dump than guys, of course. But even still, if there were dating sites where girls outnumbered guys 2.5-to-1, guys would be more picky. And IRL, in non-metropolises and outside college campuses, you'll find 95% of bars of Any type/genre having At Least as big a sausage-fest ratio as POF has. :) Hence, naturally, the gender solidly outnumbered is going to be more picky, while the other is going to be less picky than normal.

I am guessing women will be more likely to have a list of "must have" requirements more so than men, because men are primarily into physical attractions first, where as women are more into the instant whole package, meaning someone they can fall in love with quickly.

Yeah, women are more into that than guys, yeah -- the "whole package" thing. A higher % of gals feel more empty being single, notably when being a single mom for too long Or not having a kid yet with the biological clock ticking -- VS guys who aren't so much into the Concept itself of "being with someone" for the sake of fulfillment (and instead only turns on when they're dating a Specific Person they Like).

That said, there are plenty of women who have mixed feelings -- being with someone, but at the same time, enjoying being single too, due to window-shopping mode with all the options. Especially in the online dating field, and in many different types of bars, you'll commonly run into said type of women. They're kind of like Guys -- but IMO, it's more a phase, and won't necessarily last terribly long.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 48
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Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/21/2016 12:44:53 PM
Gender has noting to do with it, it depends on the people doing the picking, and what they are picking for, like just a good time thru wanting a relationship.
 skier34
Joined: 5/11/2008
Msg: 49
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Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/21/2016 5:10:49 PM
Women are without a doubt, 100% more picky/ choosy than men. A woman will reject a male, even if otherwise he is a decent looking, good guy, if one or more of their friends/ acquaintances/ co workers, think he's a dork. That situation would never happen in reverse. Thats known as "dating by association". If a guy genuinely likes a woman, it wouldn't matter if the whole world thought she was weird, it wouldn't sway the guy's opinion/ feelings towards the woman.

Women don't seem to have as much conviction as men. They are easily swayed by others opinion and have to have a sense of the other women being jealous of what they have in a guy rather than just being happy with him for themselves.

Just my opinion per what I've seen anyway.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 50
Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/21/2016 5:30:05 PM
^^^Don't forget the height issue as well. A guy and a woman could be about the same height, but she will reject the guy for being too short, because when she puts on her 5 inch stilettos, she's taller than the guy. I don't know any guy who rejects a woman because she's a few inches below the national average, and therefore too short.
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 51
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Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/21/2016 6:33:37 PM
beautiful women will marry the short bad fat man if he is successful, I dont imagine a poor fat bald man would have the options.
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 52
Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/21/2016 8:16:57 PM

beautiful women will marry the short bad fat man if he is successful, I dont imagine a poor fat bald man would have the options.


That makes it all about the money.

Not an endearing quality.

At all.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 53
Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/22/2016 6:50:22 AM

I don't know any guy who rejects a woman because she's a few inches below the national average, and therefore too short.


A better comparison would be a man not dating a woman because she's very tall. But I get your overall point. I don't think a large percentage of men will turn down a woman that they consider to be physically attractive with a good personality just because she's 6 ft tall or taller than he is.
 DD7753
Joined: 11/1/2016
Msg: 54
Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/22/2016 7:57:11 AM
in my honest personal opinion HEIGHTS should never be and issue with a woman period it just a least quality that should never matter cause it a shallow standards
 InnerGorilla2
Joined: 8/1/2016
Msg: 55
Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/22/2016 8:21:40 AM
I believe men are more picky. Yes, men may screw anything that seems to have a pair of boobs, particularly after a few drinks, but not all men are like that and I believe men are more narrow minded and driven more by looks than women are.
In the end men pursue and women veto, thus you may think that it's women with the advantage, but they are not. If a woman is not attractive, her chances of dating someone that she finds attractive are reduced tremendously. While a guy that is not that attractive, if he has personality, if he has balls, if he makes a decent living and I am not going to include here whether he is rich or famous, takes care of himself, there are plenty of women that are within his scope of attractiveness that will go for him.
 moonbeamlover1
Joined: 11/10/2016
Msg: 56
Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/22/2016 9:35:21 AM
^^^
I agree with this to a point but with exceptions.

You are using picky in two different ways. If a guy is picky based on his preference of what he finds attractive and that attractive happens to be physical...

and a woman Is picky but her pickiness happens to be a little different criteria than the man based on what her preferences are... how is his pickiness and her pickiness any different... or one better than another?

I know women that would not be considered conventionally attractive at all... and they were literally constantly approached because they had something that drew people to them and made them feel special. That unique something was outside of physical but it was incredibly charismatic. it made them beautiful.. and that is better than how features are arranged in a face or how someone is built or buff or whatever. Men with s sense of humor and confidence have that too... even if they have characteristics that are usually considered " undateable or unappealing" in stereotypical terms.

People pick based on what they connect with and hope to find someone they click with.., who also happens to click with them.

neither gender is pickier I don't think.., people settle less nowadays and hold out for what appeals to them.

though obviously as witnessed in these parts.. some with a lot of ranting about those who they pick don't happen to pick them back.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 57
Are Women much more pickier/choosy than Men when it comes to Dating/Relationships?
Posted: 11/22/2016 10:41:59 AM
I'll agree, it may be an apples to oranges comparison. If men are generally looking to get laid, and women are generally looking for relationships, then they are looking for different things and its probably easier for an attractive person to get laid, than for an attractive person to find a good match to make a relationship. So, men may be less picky b/c they seek an easier goal so they don't have to be picky in order to find their goal. Speaking in generalities, of course. It could also be argued that men operate logically, so they have a clear idea of what they want, not based on emotional feeling. Of course they can change their mind, but typically when they want something, they won't wait for it to come to them, they'l figure a logical way to make it work. It can also be said, men typically do the pursuing, hence, the women get to play gate-keeper. A man may choose who to hit on, but she's seen as choosing to say yes or no. She gets the final vote.

I dated a gal who wasn't conventially attractive, but two male coworkers were overhead saying over a live walkie talkie (She worked at a landscaping place), "there's just something about her". And I knew what it was--she had a healthy attitude about having sex. A sensual woman who appears to be willing in her own mind to have sex with a guy, can be really sexy. If she's halfway good looking, and the fellow gets the vibe he isn't going to have to jump thru hoops, he can be interested in the suggestion of sexual pleasure. For some of us average looking guys, our first gf(s) may indeed have been the "willing woman". No one else would give us a chance, they were too focused on getting arm candy to impress their friends or to date the status guy like the captain of the team. A woman who's already interested in having sex, is "just" looking for someone they're comfortable with. They may not even be looking for a long term relationship, and we may be too geeky and insecure to provide one at that time.

or maybe she's looking for a characteristic, a saphiophile for example.
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