Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  >      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Tarah0128
Joined: 2/25/2009
Msg: 155
view profile
History
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to Page 7 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
Of course it's acceptable or else prostitution wouldn't have been around forever

Someone is finding it acceptable and useful ~ Gregory House, for example
 Energymaster
Joined: 10/4/2009
Msg: 156
view profile
History
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 3:11:08 PM
Given, "pigs" is in and of itself a dated term. Replaces by "slime." Not sure that's much better.

It would do BOTH genders in American culture (this is not a problem in Europe, generally) well to learn a thing or three about the other, rather than relying upon Oprah and "reality" TV to do the heavy intellectual lifting for us.

But then, in our culture, you really are not permitted to tell the truth about women...not if you want to keep your academic standing, and/or sell your books in a female-dominated industry that sells to a female dominated market, anyway.

So the author who essentially said that men invented the term "gold-digger" (very unlikely) was simply, as another poster noted, pandering to his market--women who love to blame ALL the ills of society on men and of course, their peni.
 Energymaster
Joined: 10/4/2009
Msg: 157
view profile
History
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 3:18:10 PM
Revisit your history, TuffLuv....The Romans had the ideal of the monogamous relationship long before Christianity and they had little regard for Jewish culture, and no contact with it, in fact, until quite late.

Men are not "hard-wired" to be monogmous....we are wired to spread our seed as wide as circumstances permit...just like most male animals. That's why young dolphin males rape young dolphin females...regularly, and in organized packs. It's also why chimps do it. And ducks. Drakes sometimes kill ducks during this process when 6-8 of them pile on one poor duck and drown her. Female dolphins apparently also run this risk.

So be it. That's nature. I'm not sure whether you are crowing about the theory put forth in Sperm Wars about how women behaved back in the cave....and there's really no way to determine whether that's actually the case. There's a strong case to be made for any small society having to quickly adopt rules about this sort of thing to keep all the males from constantly bashing in eash other's skulls. Regardless of what modern feminism teaches us, men ARE a necessary component to procreation. Sucks, I know...but I don't make up the immutable laws of Creation/evolution, I just enforce 'em, lady!
 ToughLuv1984
Joined: 9/2/2009
Msg: 158
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 3:21:59 PM
Read my post again... NO ONE is hard wired to be monogamous. Women aren't either. The cave woman was single minded in her quest for the best possible mate... She slept with more than one dude on a regular basis, so much so that a male's sperm evolved to 'combat' other men's sperm *inside her womb.* I kid you not.

Monogamy though was created by men to overcome the inequalities between different men in their ability to get a mate. Its is totally unnatural, true, but it favors men!
 ToughLuv1984
Joined: 9/2/2009
Msg: 159
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 3:27:37 PM
Well awesome Teenwolf, that the ideal outlook for a modern society. Most guys haven't gotten as far as you in selectivity. Most would settle for merely hot and sorta sugarcoat the rest, "Well, she is smart... she can read/write her own name." LOL.
 Energymaster
Joined: 10/4/2009
Msg: 160
view profile
History
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 3:28:30 PM
I was commenting on your assertion, TuffLuv, that them nasty ol' Christian invented monogamy...um, nope.

Your statement that monogamy was "created by men (I assume you mean the male of the human species in particular, not "men" as in "humanity") to overcome the inequalities between differet men in their ability to get a mate," simply makes no sense. Why would I, were I the alpha in the cave, want ANY other man to have a mate? Do you know that male liones, when one displaces the alpha in a pride (the alpha male in a pride has ONE purpose: to make lil' lions) the new leader kills (and eats..waste not, want not!) any offspring he finds lounging about as a means of bringing the lionesses back into estrus for his purposes?

What rational sense would it make for me to say, "yeah, g'wan, Joe...you can have that 'un over there!"
 ToughLuv1984
Joined: 9/2/2009
Msg: 161
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 3:33:48 PM
LMAO, yes, but you are assuming you would be the head honcho, lol, (funny how every guy thinks they would be the one in charge). Chances are you wouldn't be, hon. Just sayin'...

It was all the other guys that got together be it Romans or Greeks or Cretans or Sumerians or whatever... they made up those rules to even the playing field. Made it more democratic and egalitarian, so each would have a crack at reproduction.
 Eldrida
Joined: 11/13/2009
Msg: 162
view profile
History
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 3:39:36 PM
On polygamy-

In many societies, polygamy made sense. Things like warfare meant that there were far more females than males- and many of these cultures prevented women earning their own income. It was a financial thing.

I'm curious as to how on earth people know about the sexual habits of cave women.
 Energymaster
Joined: 10/4/2009
Msg: 163
view profile
History
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 3:39:44 PM
Yeah...that's pretty much the response I anticipated.

I'm not sure why women feel the need to do that, but oh, well.

BTW: I would be. Just sayin! Not that that's what I said previously, of course, but for some reason, women, when you point up that their assertions and beliefs are flawed, immediately retreat into this sort of thing. At least you didn't tell me my penis is small, huh?

Repeating a flawed premise over and over, even if you add in more players, does not magically make it true. Your assertion does not make rational sense. Men (as with any other animal)--and I mean the male of the species--are by nature competitive. "Giving" the other guy girls does not happen. You MIGHT let your wingman have the fat, homely one...but the alpha does not do it this way. I never did that when I used to be the alpha (for getting the babes anyway...can't WAIT for the biting response to that one!) in my clubbing days. In fact, I often insisted on taking at least two, leaving even fewer for those lesser males.

Just sayin!
 ToughLuv1984
Joined: 9/2/2009
Msg: 164
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 3:48:57 PM
Believe what you wish... but just because guys are 'competitive' doesn't mean all guys 'win' and the perpetual losers at the mating game: short, puny, fat, BALD, poor, & old banded together to even the playing field. It was either cooperate or continue losing out. Creating monogamy was a triumph of civilization, they used their brains to compete.

Eldrida, they did so from observing the various evolved 'tasks' that sperm had to compete with each other in the womb and extrapolated from this. For instance, a man who has been away from his mate for a long time is going to have 10x more potent sperm than normal because the 'chances' that she mated with another man in his absence were 'higher' so his seed is 'amped up' and ready to fight it out to get that egg fertilized. They have even found distinct 'types' of sperm that carry out different tasks. Its quite fascinating.
 Energymaster
Joined: 10/4/2009
Msg: 165
view profile
History
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 3:51:10 PM
I'm at a loss here..it's clear you either have pretty severe comprehension issues...or you are simply ignoring reality.

And again: simply repeating the same argument, without any elaboration, over and over, does not make the argument more true...it simply indicates you haven't the vaguest notion.
 ToughLuv1984
Joined: 9/2/2009
Msg: 166
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 3:55:21 PM
I'm ignoring reality or have reading comprehension issues because I don't think you'd be alpha male? LOL. Sorry if you got your feelings hurt. Give it up. You don't like the conclusion but it totally makes sense. You can't just 'cherry pick' and think that evolutionary biology only applies to men.ll. Give me a break. I *did* elaborate... and I'm actually citing a book, which you are free to go out and read. Jeebus! What did you cite? Nada... nuthin at all... RIGHT! More bruised ego posturing. "If I don't like the message... it must not make sense."
 Energymaster
Joined: 10/4/2009
Msg: 167
view profile
History
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 3:58:29 PM
Jeebus...I've read it. And countless others. It's an interesting idea, backed by virtually no evidence.

As is your assertion, jeebus! It's not a matter of what I "like," it's a matter of whether it makes any sense. It does not, for the reasons I've (attempted) to explain...but like many people, you "read the book!" and that book as thereby become the Last Word.

That's great. Has no connection to reality, tho.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 168
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 4:10:27 PM
The fat homely one is not fat and homely to everyone, and few of said women would settle for being second best, like most women, they also do not want to be given to anyone.
 deltadallas
Joined: 7/13/2009
Msg: 169
view profile
History
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 4:22:08 PM
what are men called who are gold diggers? perfect person who comes to mind is kevin federline (brittney's low life ex). if a man is whining about buying a woman a drink then he should not go to a club or go to a male gay club where he will not have that problem. but he could probably have that problem with dudes wanting him to buy a drink.
 wild heart
Joined: 10/14/2007
Msg: 170
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 4:48:10 PM

I don't have children, but if I did, they would be raised to work for what they want. No daughter of mine will be taught that her "biology" dictates she seek a man with lots of money. She will be taught to go to school, work hard, and get her own.


So did the guy who admitted giving his daughters too much. EVERY man I have ever met (apart from abusive ones) has thought his daughter was "special". What parent doesn't?! That in itself gives everyone a sense of entitlement.

Come back and comment when you do actually have a daughter. People without children say all sorts of stuff when they are not a parent. Having a daughter changes a man in many ways, heck having children changes a man in many ways.

And I know you are going to comment that I don't have children. I lived with my brother and his two kids (one boy, one girl) for about 7 years as his children grew up (from the time she was a baby) and then lived with my other brother for 8 years who also had a daughter.

BTW - Most women today have been taught to go to school, work and get their own - so how do you explain their entitlement?

As a man you can never really relate to how today's women feel because they now have to work and they came from a home with a stay at home mom and now they cannot provide the same level of care they feel they received from their mothers and the guilt that that can instill in a woman. Maybe the next generation will be able to avoid that. But at what cost I wonder?


Herein lies the problem: If I offer the "whole package", then I will seek the same in return. A hot woman who has no job or a shvty paying job and is dependent on others isn't the "whole package". As has been said many times, water seeks it's own level.


I agree with you - why shouldn't men seek out the same? I've no beef with a man who wants that and even know some guys who hold that belief. I've always thought I should be seeking out a man who is similar to me in most areas. Besides, I don't come from rich and I don't like rich men anyway (even though they seem to like me simply because I'm blonde and thin). A man worried about women taking his money or a man bragging or whining about his money are both "losers" in my book. I don't want to hear about your money or lack of.


A true gold digger offers attraction and little more. She is far from the "whole package".


Most men will be pulled in very very easily by that. I've seen it happen many many times. My biological father got himself in that very situation. Once they had a child, he wanted to stay home and spend time with his new family; but she was still interested in having a good time so she took his credit card and went out without him. He once told me "I like them when they look like their sh*t don't stink". He readily admitted that she played to his ego. Some women are very very good at playing to a man's ego - those are the ones who are seldom without male attention interestingly enough. But they are lauded as "nice, good hearted women" because they are so feminine and smiley and kind to all men they meet (which leads some of the poor suckers on), while the women who cannot or refuse to behave like this get passed over - kinda like the whole nice guy in reverse LOL.
 GotAHubCapDiamondStarHalo
Joined: 10/25/2009
Msg: 171
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 5:15:58 PM
Now that I consider it, in a Club, I would expect a man to buy drinks for me. That is how they show concrete evidence of their interest in me. Talk is cheap! Why should I hang around with a guy who won't spring? In a way, he is golddigging my time, because if he is not paying, he is monopolizing me and keeping me from meeting someone who may want to shower his attention on me! Really, I feel like the guy is a golddigger if he is not paying for BOTH of us!
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 172
view profile
History
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 5:31:14 PM
These men that are whining about a Gold-digger are men with no personality, they invited a woman for a date ,pay $4.00 + drinks and if he can't get a score for that amount he'd be screaming high up to heaven 'Gold diggers !!!!! LOL.

To these Gigolo who hate Golddiggers get a great personality and get a life, .. Those good women is just around the corner but are not looking for Gigolos... It's as simple as that.

Water seeks its own level.
 TheReason_
Joined: 5/16/2009
Msg: 173
view profile
History
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 6:23:36 PM

Now that I consider it, in a Club, I would expect a man to buy drinks for me. That is how they show concrete evidence of their interest in me. Talk is cheap! Why should I hang around with a guy who won't spring? In a way, he is golddigging my time, because if he is not paying, he is monopolizing me and keeping me from meeting someone who may want to shower his attention on me! Really, I feel like the guy is a golddigger if he is not paying for BOTH of us!


so you are saying that a man gets to date you O.A.C.?



 GotAHubCapDiamondStarHalo
Joined: 10/25/2009
Msg: 174
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 6:26:03 PM
I need to know if he is solvent. Only fair ... I am!
 Old School Naturist
Joined: 12/12/2009
Msg: 175
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 6:27:49 PM
POOLBOY vs GOLD DIGGER!

I truly do not think either sex has the market cornered on the subject of "using". I have no idea where this author got his "information", but I think he is a "sh_thouse shrink" that got tired of seeing his patients jump out of his office window so he wrote a book to make them all jump at once!(grin)

That said, motives are rather interesting tho!
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 176
view profile
History
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 6:31:31 AM
Thanks for your banter that offers little to the topic at hand


You are welcome, my comment though it stated as a banter is a big factor on the topic of golddiggers ,paying for drinks, Steve Harvey's book ,ect.. that diversify in to different subjects of man and woman..
My guide line on my comment is reading some argument of some Author here,and understand the way I percieve it.. Some men complained in POF forum on those women they dated that they are golddiger, it is their own will to pay for the woman drinks or food,the woman did n't put a gun on his head to pay for her meals or drinks so he can not say that he has no choice....... On the other hand , he is hoping that he can get a run on his money by getting a score on that woman. I repeat these men have no personality and no life. I am not speaking on theories but on experiences.

Men can play a savvy, upscale ,intelligent gentleman to his date,treat his date with hospitality that he can afford and enjoy their social event. Or act like a babboon complained "golddigger",because he didn't get to paw her intimate anatomy and appease his sexual urges,for treating her a dinner or c*cktail drinks.

Your comment is just one man opinion of my argument, and it doesn't bother me..
Actually ,there is no RIGHT and WRONG on people's commentaries, but some of it are impressive and some are not. Teenwolf, both of us did not lose anything,because I am not impressed of your comments. When a person argue for the sake of argument it lose the meaning of what it conveys ,it becomes a Blah Blah Blah...
 ghostdog1973
Joined: 1/2/2010
Msg: 177
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 6:51:55 AM

Some men complained in POF forum on those women they dated that they are golddiger, it is their own will to pay for the woman drinks or food,the woman did n't put a gun on his head to pay for her meals or drinks so he can not say that he has no choice....... On the other hand , he is hoping that he can get a run on his money by getting a score on that woman. I repeat these men have no personality and no life. I am not speaking on theories but on experiences.

Men can play a savvy, upscale ,intelligent gentleman to his date,treat his date with hospitality that he can afford and enjoy their social event. Or act like a babboon complained "golddigger",because he didn't get to paw her intimate anatomy and appease his sexual urges,for treating her a dinner or c*cktail drinks.


I do agree with this. I mean she's only a real gold digger (for you) if you're giving her your gold. You can always tell her to shuttle along...

I also find it amusing that guys (middle class) will spend a lot of money on a nice car, lots of nice expensive clothes, doing up the whole package...then balk at a girl that wants him to take her somewhere other than McDonalds or wants him to be paying for $20/drinks for her...

If you put the package out there that you've got money- expect at some level to attract women that are going to be more drawn to that lifestyle.

On the same note- take away your fancy far for a more modest one, slowdown on the "latest styles in clothes" a bit and go to the same bars and tell me if the hotties that are gold diggers are still approaching you.

If you are getting attention based on a perception that you have money (when in fact you're just a middle class clown- with an excessive credit card bill) then don't get mad if are attracting those kinds of women.

Kinda like the "good girls" dressed up like slutty whores always wondering why the guys they attract only are looking for sex and nothing meaningful...
 thegirliest
Joined: 7/31/2008
Msg: 178
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 7:12:49 AM
Some men who lable women as gold diggers are the SAME ones who make sure to let you know everything they own...houses, boats, cars, toys etc....as if it's bait. They will even do it on their site. Those kind of men lack character and are shallow. Their opinion of women is already low and are not looking for a life partner, only a lay. ALSO there is the reversism...gold digging men!
 thegirliest
Joined: 7/31/2008
Msg: 179
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 7:19:36 AM
Wow, Ghost! I really enjoyed your reply...so intelligent and it insightful. Also, I agree with you bout the women that put their seex out there and then wonder why that is the reason they are approached...aren't we just sexy enough already just being female and fem? I think I look appealing no matter what I wear and prefer to be approached for my sparkle...you know...that certain something that will make me stand out in a crowd to one man but not the other. Thanx for your comments
Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  >