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 ToughLuv1984
Joined: 9/2/2009
Msg: 166
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to Page 7 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
I'm ignoring reality or have reading comprehension issues because I don't think you'd be alpha male? LOL. Sorry if you got your feelings hurt. Give it up. You don't like the conclusion but it totally makes sense. You can't just 'cherry pick' and think that evolutionary biology only applies to men.ll. Give me a break. I *did* elaborate... and I'm actually citing a book, which you are free to go out and read. Jeebus! What did you cite? Nada... nuthin at all... RIGHT! More bruised ego posturing. "If I don't like the message... it must not make sense."
 Energymaster
Joined: 10/4/2009
Msg: 167
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Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 3:58:29 PM
Jeebus...I've read it. And countless others. It's an interesting idea, backed by virtually no evidence.

As is your assertion, jeebus! It's not a matter of what I "like," it's a matter of whether it makes any sense. It does not, for the reasons I've (attempted) to explain...but like many people, you "read the book!" and that book as thereby become the Last Word.

That's great. Has no connection to reality, tho.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 168
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 4:10:27 PM
The fat homely one is not fat and homely to everyone, and few of said women would settle for being second best, like most women, they also do not want to be given to anyone.
 deltadallas
Joined: 7/13/2009
Msg: 169
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Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 4:22:08 PM
what are men called who are gold diggers? perfect person who comes to mind is kevin federline (brittney's low life ex). if a man is whining about buying a woman a drink then he should not go to a club or go to a male gay club where he will not have that problem. but he could probably have that problem with dudes wanting him to buy a drink.
 wild heart
Joined: 10/14/2007
Msg: 170
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 4:48:10 PM

I don't have children, but if I did, they would be raised to work for what they want. No daughter of mine will be taught that her "biology" dictates she seek a man with lots of money. She will be taught to go to school, work hard, and get her own.


So did the guy who admitted giving his daughters too much. EVERY man I have ever met (apart from abusive ones) has thought his daughter was "special". What parent doesn't?! That in itself gives everyone a sense of entitlement.

Come back and comment when you do actually have a daughter. People without children say all sorts of stuff when they are not a parent. Having a daughter changes a man in many ways, heck having children changes a man in many ways.

And I know you are going to comment that I don't have children. I lived with my brother and his two kids (one boy, one girl) for about 7 years as his children grew up (from the time she was a baby) and then lived with my other brother for 8 years who also had a daughter.

BTW - Most women today have been taught to go to school, work and get their own - so how do you explain their entitlement?

As a man you can never really relate to how today's women feel because they now have to work and they came from a home with a stay at home mom and now they cannot provide the same level of care they feel they received from their mothers and the guilt that that can instill in a woman. Maybe the next generation will be able to avoid that. But at what cost I wonder?


Herein lies the problem: If I offer the "whole package", then I will seek the same in return. A hot woman who has no job or a shvty paying job and is dependent on others isn't the "whole package". As has been said many times, water seeks it's own level.


I agree with you - why shouldn't men seek out the same? I've no beef with a man who wants that and even know some guys who hold that belief. I've always thought I should be seeking out a man who is similar to me in most areas. Besides, I don't come from rich and I don't like rich men anyway (even though they seem to like me simply because I'm blonde and thin). A man worried about women taking his money or a man bragging or whining about his money are both "losers" in my book. I don't want to hear about your money or lack of.


A true gold digger offers attraction and little more. She is far from the "whole package".


Most men will be pulled in very very easily by that. I've seen it happen many many times. My biological father got himself in that very situation. Once they had a child, he wanted to stay home and spend time with his new family; but she was still interested in having a good time so she took his credit card and went out without him. He once told me "I like them when they look like their sh*t don't stink". He readily admitted that she played to his ego. Some women are very very good at playing to a man's ego - those are the ones who are seldom without male attention interestingly enough. But they are lauded as "nice, good hearted women" because they are so feminine and smiley and kind to all men they meet (which leads some of the poor suckers on), while the women who cannot or refuse to behave like this get passed over - kinda like the whole nice guy in reverse LOL.
 GotAHubCapDiamondStarHalo
Joined: 10/25/2009
Msg: 171
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 5:15:58 PM
Now that I consider it, in a Club, I would expect a man to buy drinks for me. That is how they show concrete evidence of their interest in me. Talk is cheap! Why should I hang around with a guy who won't spring? In a way, he is golddigging my time, because if he is not paying, he is monopolizing me and keeping me from meeting someone who may want to shower his attention on me! Really, I feel like the guy is a golddigger if he is not paying for BOTH of us!
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 172
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Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 5:31:14 PM
These men that are whining about a Gold-digger are men with no personality, they invited a woman for a date ,pay $4.00 + drinks and if he can't get a score for that amount he'd be screaming high up to heaven 'Gold diggers !!!!! LOL.

To these Gigolo who hate Golddiggers get a great personality and get a life, .. Those good women is just around the corner but are not looking for Gigolos... It's as simple as that.

Water seeks its own level.
 TheReason_
Joined: 5/16/2009
Msg: 173
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Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 6:23:36 PM

Now that I consider it, in a Club, I would expect a man to buy drinks for me. That is how they show concrete evidence of their interest in me. Talk is cheap! Why should I hang around with a guy who won't spring? In a way, he is golddigging my time, because if he is not paying, he is monopolizing me and keeping me from meeting someone who may want to shower his attention on me! Really, I feel like the guy is a golddigger if he is not paying for BOTH of us!


so you are saying that a man gets to date you O.A.C.?



 GotAHubCapDiamondStarHalo
Joined: 10/25/2009
Msg: 174
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 6:26:03 PM
I need to know if he is solvent. Only fair ... I am!
 Old School Naturist
Joined: 12/12/2009
Msg: 175
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/9/2010 6:27:49 PM
POOLBOY vs GOLD DIGGER!

I truly do not think either sex has the market cornered on the subject of "using". I have no idea where this author got his "information", but I think he is a "sh_thouse shrink" that got tired of seeing his patients jump out of his office window so he wrote a book to make them all jump at once!(grin)

That said, motives are rather interesting tho!
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 176
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Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 6:31:31 AM
Thanks for your banter that offers little to the topic at hand


You are welcome, my comment though it stated as a banter is a big factor on the topic of golddiggers ,paying for drinks, Steve Harvey's book ,ect.. that diversify in to different subjects of man and woman..
My guide line on my comment is reading some argument of some Author here,and understand the way I percieve it.. Some men complained in POF forum on those women they dated that they are golddiger, it is their own will to pay for the woman drinks or food,the woman did n't put a gun on his head to pay for her meals or drinks so he can not say that he has no choice....... On the other hand , he is hoping that he can get a run on his money by getting a score on that woman. I repeat these men have no personality and no life. I am not speaking on theories but on experiences.

Men can play a savvy, upscale ,intelligent gentleman to his date,treat his date with hospitality that he can afford and enjoy their social event. Or act like a babboon complained "golddigger",because he didn't get to paw her intimate anatomy and appease his sexual urges,for treating her a dinner or c*cktail drinks.

Your comment is just one man opinion of my argument, and it doesn't bother me..
Actually ,there is no RIGHT and WRONG on people's commentaries, but some of it are impressive and some are not. Teenwolf, both of us did not lose anything,because I am not impressed of your comments. When a person argue for the sake of argument it lose the meaning of what it conveys ,it becomes a Blah Blah Blah...
 ghostdog1973
Joined: 1/2/2010
Msg: 177
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 6:51:55 AM

Some men complained in POF forum on those women they dated that they are golddiger, it is their own will to pay for the woman drinks or food,the woman did n't put a gun on his head to pay for her meals or drinks so he can not say that he has no choice....... On the other hand , he is hoping that he can get a run on his money by getting a score on that woman. I repeat these men have no personality and no life. I am not speaking on theories but on experiences.

Men can play a savvy, upscale ,intelligent gentleman to his date,treat his date with hospitality that he can afford and enjoy their social event. Or act like a babboon complained "golddigger",because he didn't get to paw her intimate anatomy and appease his sexual urges,for treating her a dinner or c*cktail drinks.


I do agree with this. I mean she's only a real gold digger (for you) if you're giving her your gold. You can always tell her to shuttle along...

I also find it amusing that guys (middle class) will spend a lot of money on a nice car, lots of nice expensive clothes, doing up the whole package...then balk at a girl that wants him to take her somewhere other than McDonalds or wants him to be paying for $20/drinks for her...

If you put the package out there that you've got money- expect at some level to attract women that are going to be more drawn to that lifestyle.

On the same note- take away your fancy far for a more modest one, slowdown on the "latest styles in clothes" a bit and go to the same bars and tell me if the hotties that are gold diggers are still approaching you.

If you are getting attention based on a perception that you have money (when in fact you're just a middle class clown- with an excessive credit card bill) then don't get mad if are attracting those kinds of women.

Kinda like the "good girls" dressed up like slutty whores always wondering why the guys they attract only are looking for sex and nothing meaningful...
 thegirliest
Joined: 7/31/2008
Msg: 178
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 7:12:49 AM
Some men who lable women as gold diggers are the SAME ones who make sure to let you know everything they own...houses, boats, cars, toys etc....as if it's bait. They will even do it on their site. Those kind of men lack character and are shallow. Their opinion of women is already low and are not looking for a life partner, only a lay. ALSO there is the reversism...gold digging men!
 thegirliest
Joined: 7/31/2008
Msg: 179
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 7:19:36 AM
Wow, Ghost! I really enjoyed your reply...so intelligent and it insightful. Also, I agree with you bout the women that put their seex out there and then wonder why that is the reason they are approached...aren't we just sexy enough already just being female and fem? I think I look appealing no matter what I wear and prefer to be approached for my sparkle...you know...that certain something that will make me stand out in a crowd to one man but not the other. Thanx for your comments
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 180
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Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 7:22:29 AM
Meeting opposite sex is not really hard, when the rapport is already stablished through emails ,phone . Just be honest... One guy that I met (first time) through here, told me that we''ll dine at this certain casino near a nice lake. He sound like he doesn't have very much money to burn,so I offer and insisted I 'll bring the food and pop soda all he has to do is bring his hungry self at the lake. We have a nice time getting to know each other personally and enjoyed a good chat...


Ghostdog , high five!!!! I am impressed of your insight as a true gentleman.
 ghostdog1973
Joined: 1/2/2010
Msg: 181
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 7:34:30 AM
Wow, Ghost! I really enjoyed your reply...so intelligent and it insightful. Also, I agree with you bout the women that put their seex out there and then wonder why that is the reason they are approached...aren't we just sexy enough already just being female and fem? I think I look appealing no matter what I wear and prefer to be approached for my sparkle...you know...that certain something that will make me stand out in a crowd to one man but not the other. Thanx for your comments


THanks girliest...Myself when I'm looking for women- I do not go out looking for the one with the sexiest dress/outfit/cleavage showing, etc...Not that I don't find them attractive- but I know for the most part it is a bill of goods. It screams "I want all the guys to look at me so I can pick and choose and get all this attention because guys are falling all over me"

Same thing with the guys. I had a buddy couple years back just got out of his 1st marriage. He was 30, made $100K/ year (good money but not great) so He lost all of his marriage fat and was ready for the market. He was financing a $50K BMW, bought an expensive townhouse, a pile of True Religion jeans (with the hot shoes and shirts to go with it)...

In no time at all he found him a screaming hot 22 year old (that was typically way out of his league) and off he went partying his tail off...He was "happy"...

Next thing you know after about a year or so- she's left him...and he's got $80K in credit card debt...from all the partying...He gets mad cause "she was a gold digger"...

LOL

I was like - well you led her to believe you had all this money and such, that's your fault and now who's stuck holding the bill?



Ghostdog , high five!!!! I am impressed of your insight as a true gentleman.


for the things i want in this life go beyond material things. yes I like dating hot sexy women- but I look to find one of substance internally and externally. Otherwise, what's the point?

Personally- I will take a gal that is a 7-8 looks with a 9-10 on the inside before I'll take a 10 looks with 6-8 on the inside...

 wild heart
Joined: 10/14/2007
Msg: 183
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 7:42:54 AM
Next thing you know after about a year or so- she's left him...and he's got $80K in credit card debt...from all the partying...He gets mad cause "she was a gold digger"...


Yep, I already alluded to a similar story that my biological father went through. He readily admits it was all ego. Note that he was able to admit his part in it as well, and not just blame the woman. I didn't agree with what she did much, but as you have said, he let her and we are all guilty of this behaviour to a degree. Some of us take more responsibility for our own part in things than others do. I call that being mature and really knowing yourself.

The scenario is played out again and again with men and "hot chicks". Men repeatedly say they would not go for the woman who is a gold digger, but many often do. These women know how to play up to a man's ego, whereas us women who don't wish to play those games are often bypassed by men for the hot twit.

This behaviour is not a new concept either.

Teenwolf - some good responses in your last post!

As for men buying me drinks at a club? I don't mind if we are going together and know each other well, then we can take turns. But if it is a first date? I don't want him going to get my drinks, it's a safety issue. Drinks can sometimes cost more than a meal, so again I would use the same wanting to go dutch.
 ghostdog1973
Joined: 1/2/2010
Msg: 184
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 7:58:55 AM
Wildheart- what's the "safety issue" of his getting your drinks? The fact that he'd be will to buy too much alcohol so yall were drunk before you knew it?

I'm a guy that rarely RARELY buys drinks for girls at the bar. The way I look at it- there are tons of drink whores out there looking for me and everyone else to buy 'em a drink and then they run off either with someone else or home alone.

So my strategy is this: In this day and age as a woman- you've chosen to go out to the club/bar. Clearly you have enough money to buy yourself a drink. So if you're really interested in having a drink, you'll buy it yourself. OR you're there to get free drinks from guys...I'm not going in impress you with the fact that I bought you a drink. You can get 10 guys to buy you a drink every nigth at the club. .

If I find a girl that I am interested in, by all means I will have no problem going up and talking to her. If we have a connection/good convo...maybe we dance or whatever. When my drink is finished- I'll wave over at the bartender to fill my drink and will not offer to refill her drink (at first)...

If at that point she's interested she will order herself a drink (as opposed to giving me the cold shoulder and waiting for another chump to buy her a drink) and we'll continue the conversation. Once a girl gets past that point- it is clear she is interested in me almost all of the time. Next drink and the rest of the night, they are on me...

Followed up by her number.

This way I weed out all the fakes and game players not interested in me...

Then you'll never hear me complaining about 'gold diggers' cause i've weeded them out early...
 wild heart
Joined: 10/14/2007
Msg: 185
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 8:08:07 AM
Ghostdog - If you don't know what the safety issue is (on a first date with a virtual stranger), then you should do some research.


Sure, you don't have to pay for a woman at dinner, but if you have any inclination towards having her see you again romantically and not 'friend zone you' you should be picking up that tab.


I went out with a guy on several dates, and we took turns paying. Yes, we did not end up together, but we didn't know that as we dated. Who's to say a man won't lavish a woman with money once they are dating? For example, women are always going on about how married men are "such a catch". Well, I'm guessing that as they fell more in love, they became more of a catch. I'm not just talking the money side here either.
 Tarah0128
Joined: 2/25/2009
Msg: 186
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Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 8:10:11 AM

Best to just get the one on the corner. She'll tell you exactly how much she costs.


Exactly!!! That's my approach to guys who are only looking to get laid ~ go buy yourself some tail
 ghostdog1973
Joined: 1/2/2010
Msg: 187
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 8:13:43 AM

Ghostdog - If you don't know what the safety issue is (on a first date with a virtual stranger), then you should do some research.


ahhh I see- i forget there are some sickos out there...forgive me if "date drugs" are not on my mind as a consideration to use ever on a date...


i forget guys do this crap and those things do offend me that i may have to contend with that crap when I"m on a first date w/ a girl...
 MonieLove_LovesU
Joined: 6/19/2009
Msg: 188
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 8:17:57 AM
Bravo! Bravo! Well said, you have hit all the points in your posting and I enjoyed reading every bit of it...thanks for sharing your great insight....

MonieLove...
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 189
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Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 8:20:50 AM
Best to just get the one on the corner. She'll tell you exactly how much she costs.


If you are talking about that corner near the Red Light, she'll you tell that it is costly for an easy POP.
But that other corner she'll tell you it will cost you ~ your emotional commitment and devotion that is priceless.....
 MonieLove_LovesU
Joined: 6/19/2009
Msg: 190
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 8:24:08 AM
Bravo...Well spoken! I enjoyed every word of your posting...and you've established your point quite well....With that, it sounds as if you have a winning relationship, one that only most of us will dream of having...and spend a life time searching for...therefore I say to you....Hold on to your loved one...and when and if you do hit a few bumps in the road.... retreat back to this posting and remind yourself how good it was and how good it could be again...allow your own words to heal whatever ripples that come about...Anyway...Great post...Thank you for sharing your wonderful insight....

MonieLove...
 ghostdog1973
Joined: 1/2/2010
Msg: 191
Gold-digger is just a term men invented to
Posted: 1/10/2010 8:24:15 AM

Bravo! Bravo! Well said, you have hit all the points in your posting and I enjoyed reading every bit of it...thanks for sharing your great insight....

MonieLove...


ummm who are you referring to?
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