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Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 RogerFict
Joined: 10/2/2009
Msg: 1
Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!Page 3 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
...hey guys, I just wanted to get everyone's opinion on something that recently happened to a friend of mine. Okay, full disclosure, the guy has been my buddy since high school...he is an honest, easy going, polite, and respectful guy, who is always there for his friends. Well, for whatever reason (we really don't discuss "personal" issues that much, mainly sports, politics, our jobs, etc.) he doesn't "date" women. What I mean by that is this, he never hits on/flirts with women, never approaches them or asks the out or for their phone numbers, etc. Don't get me wrong, he talks to them (at the gym, at work, etc.) but it is always innocent small talk (about the weather, etc.). He never takes it any further than that or shows any interest in them.

...so, to fill his sexual urges/needs he routinely makes use of a local escort service and a few independent providers in the area. Now, I always felt that his was his business/his life, and left it at that. Unfortunately, he was recently arrested, however, attempted to solicit a prostitute. He attempted to plead guilty to the charge immediately, to brush it under the rug and make it go away, however news of his arrest and indictment was discovered by his employer ( a law firm) which immediately terminated him. Now he is out of work (in this economy) even though he was an excellent attorney. Is it fair that a guy should lose his job because of something he did, on his own time, far away from his place of business? I don't really see how it is any of the firm's business, and I think that it is unfair that now he is forced to look for work,when the firm was always happy with his work ethic/product. What do ya'll think of this?
 RogerFict
Joined: 10/2/2009
Msg: 2
Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 10/9/2009 11:23:23 AM
well Scott, you hit the nail right on the head. He told me that the Sr. Partner told him that the firm couldn't be known for having attorneys who got arrested for being with prostitutes, etc. I just think that it was unduly harsh however, since he had been an excellent attorney with them and since it's not like he killed or raped anyone....he just paid for sex, which in many parts of the world is perfectly legal. I guess I just don't get it.
 Antithetical
Joined: 8/13/2009
Msg: 3
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Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 10/9/2009 11:24:43 AM
Prostitution is looked down upon in many parts of the world, and by many people. I think it ought to be legal and regulated... but I'm in the minority. Even if his firm didn't personally have any issues with it, they probably felt that he had become a liability to them and cut him loose.

Is it fair? IMO, no. But then the world isn't fair....
 RogerFict
Joined: 10/2/2009
Msg: 4
Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 10/9/2009 11:25:38 AM
Crane, in response to your post, oh he knew that the ABA would take issue with his arrest, possibly suspending his license, but he did not feel that he would be disbarred for a first time arrest for something of this nature...and he wasn't. Also, he just figured that he would never get arrested for it...yeah, he was obviously wrong, but it's not the case that he didn't realize that attorneys cannot have criminal records.
 Sabrosura
Joined: 1/7/2009
Msg: 5
Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 10/9/2009 11:26:09 AM
OP: A law firm cannot have people on their staff who have been arrested for soliciting a prostitute (it's illegal and he should know better considering he's a LAWYER).

It sucks, but that's the chance he took by participating in something that is illegal here in NY.
 RogerFict
Joined: 10/2/2009
Msg: 6
Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 10/9/2009 11:40:06 AM
...well I appreiate the responses so far, and I am glad that at least a few of ya'll were sympathetic to him. I mean, like I said, I get the whole 'arrests are bad for our image" line of reasoning from the Firm's perspective, BUT I think you have to look at WHAT his arrest was for..it wasn't for anything serious ro depraved...it wasn't for rape, or murder, or anything to do with kids, etc. It was for attempting to pay a consenting, adult woman for sex....to get arrested and to lose your job over that is just INSANE in my opinion. Kinda like giving someone the death penalty for littering....u know?
 RogerFict
Joined: 10/2/2009
Msg: 7
Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 10/9/2009 11:55:08 AM
bluesandrock, with all due respect, you know what I mean. All I said was that his arrest was not for something of a SERIOUS or highly OFFENSIVE nature (murder, kidnapping, anything involving kids, etc.).....it was for SEX. lol...come on now, dude.
 GeneralizingNow
Joined: 10/10/2007
Msg: 8
Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 10/9/2009 12:50:45 PM
???
If he beat some prostitute up, would you be as surprised? I wonder where you'd draw the line for this "good guy" friend of yours about whom you actually know little except his favorite football team.

He broke the law; works at a LAW firm. There are lots of jobs that have these "morals clauses", too, although I doubt a law firm would be one of them! lol

I suspect a lot of the people who agree with you think prostitution is a "victimless crime"--mostly cuz they're not counting the woman in the equation.
 Sabrosura
Joined: 1/7/2009
Msg: 9
Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 10/9/2009 12:55:58 PM
Poof!!!! OP left the Pond already..........Wow! I guess since we weren't jumping on the bandwagon...............
 WalkingInLondon
Joined: 2/21/2005
Msg: 10
Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 10/9/2009 1:41:29 PM
LOL, what a dumbass. Just because you don't agree with the law doesn't mean you don't have to obey it!

Imagine hiring a firm to handle a serious case, then having your opposition in court laughing at your team, along with the judge, because your lawyer got busted for solicitation...I can hear it now, are his paralegals hookers? He should really have thought before he acted.

His only option is to take the bar in another state, and hope his reputation does not follow him.

I just have to say it again. What a dumbass.

Beth
 Sabrosura
Joined: 1/7/2009
Msg: 11
Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 10/9/2009 5:20:32 PM

Off with his head!!!


LMAO!!!! Which "head"?!
 arwen52
Joined: 3/13/2008
Msg: 12
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Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 10/9/2009 5:38:22 PM
In my state, I would lose my license to practice if I were convicted of soliciting a prostitute.
 Tarnished_Knight
Joined: 3/5/2009
Msg: 13
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Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 10/9/2009 9:29:37 PM

If this guy was a defense attorney, then his credilility (sic) just went out the window.
Agreed, but not completely.


The prosecution would have no trouble discrediting council and he would be useless in defense.
Mr. OnDMove, how does opposing counsel go about discrediting? Raise it in a motion? Bring it up before the jury (Oh I can hear the objection over that from here!). Well??? Please, enlighten me!!! Don't forget, counsel is not on trial, defendant is on trial. You'll look like an ass if you try and go after opposing counsel. You watch too much TV.


I can't think of a single corporation willing to deal with an attorney with a record of any kind as their representative.
Don't be too surprised. There are lots of misdemeanors out there and lots of attoneys. Their paths often cross.


However, having said that...

He'll probably wind up in the White House eventually...

I have to agree; but with this modification: "he'll probably wind up in THIS White House eventually..."

TK
{That's Tarnished_Knight, Esq.}
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 14
Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 10/9/2009 10:49:26 PM
I would have fired is a ss as well. Why? You are part of the billing of the firm. So right there it's bad business. But now, let's take it down to the men level. If you are an attorney you are a man who is good at persuasion, communication and not taking short cuts. And your buddy, instead of learning how to communicate with women, present a good case as to why he should be desirable to them, took the short cut. Now he pays. I've seen attorneys that are ugly as sh it. Yet with babes to their side. Why. They stick to some convictions that are important. So, your friend, in my book deserves to be fired. Maybe he now needs to get some cojones, start his own law firm defending, maybe the prostitutes that he frequents and instead of paying for nukie, learn finally how to get it for free.
 soflnighteagle
Joined: 8/12/2009
Msg: 15
Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 10/10/2009 11:39:19 AM
Do you mean to say that you think what we do during our private time shouldn't be controlled by our employers? The question goes much more in depth than that, because this person’s action does reflect on the company he represents. What he was doing was against the law and he knew that, but chose to do it anyway. It isn't a question of should it be legal or not because it isn't, when you decided to break the law for whatever reason you must be willing to accept the consequences of your actions if caught. Companies always have the right to fire or not fire as they see fit, if he disagrees with the policy he should start his own company with different rules.
 Pingshooter
Joined: 3/15/2009
Msg: 16
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Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 6/1/2010 5:02:59 AM
Old thread revised I see...anyway, maybe the guy was a total freak and didn't think anyone would go with his sexual desires?

Regarding being fired, uh..doo-doo happens.

Society has placed (perceived or real) expectations upon some professions, like it or not.
And, like it or not, prostitution is illegal in most states.
 want to travel
Joined: 7/29/2006
Msg: 17
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Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 6/6/2010 7:51:08 AM
does this also mean that people married to leaches and parasites , are going to loose there jobs, most people pay for sex, most married people that is lol
 .dej
Joined: 11/6/2007
Msg: 18
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Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 6/7/2010 10:15:14 PM

he just paid for sex, which in many parts of the world is perfectly legal

So is slavery.

He knew the law and he broke it. If he's a lawyer, he really should have known better.
 naturallydeselected
Joined: 6/6/2010
Msg: 19
Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 6/12/2010 8:28:01 AM
Your friend can still become a politician.
 windloverr
Joined: 2/29/2008
Msg: 20
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Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 6/14/2010 1:26:00 AM
Yeah, I hate to come down as a hard a$$ on this one; but organizations who market themselves to the public as "defenders" of the law; tend to frown on their employees being publicly, on the record, brought before a judge. They tend to have issues with felonies, sex crimes, etc. It's always the details...
 want to travel
Joined: 7/29/2006
Msg: 21
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Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 6/16/2010 7:15:59 AM
i have never paid for sex, but i really do not have a problem with those that do
i am single now for 2 years and thought has come across my mind
but my morals have sopped me
any way, i agree with our prime minister who said, the govmt has no reason to be in its citizens bedrooms in 67
 want to travel
Joined: 7/29/2006
Msg: 22
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Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 6/18/2010 6:08:41 AM
women by there very nature are more promiscuous then men,just look at the amount of prostitutes, sugar babies, escorts, and hookers and compare them to how many men are prostituting themselves, in some countries prostitutes are responsible for tourism, Thailand is a great example, women are much more sexual then men, in this country, prostitutes are well respected, have good homes cars and other material goods then men, they are much more sexually satisfied too, prostitutes do what they do because they want and love to do there job, globally this is true
 want to travel
Joined: 7/29/2006
Msg: 23
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Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 6/18/2010 9:52:20 AM
i disagree women even younger one like prostituting themselves
getting paid for having all sorts of fun
a friend of mine from work had a friend from an na meeting who was a prostitute, i met her, at the time i had the opinion that it was like slavery, we talked and she said it was her best job, she started at11, and worked till she was in her 30's, she even said she really enjoyed it at that young age
think about it having all the sex you want, money lots of attention
 ASpeerNS
Joined: 5/26/2011
Msg: 24
Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 6/21/2011 10:15:49 AM
Personally, I think that his termination was unjust. He basically got fired for having sex with another consenting adult, how just happened to charge him for it upfront? Big whoop. The guy should still have his job.
 ItalOVRA
Joined: 2/23/2013
Msg: 25
Paying for Sex-Can cost you your job?!
Posted: 4/12/2013 10:25:30 AM
personally, I don't see why the guy should have been fired for what he did in his private life.
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