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 cap_n_mORGAN
Joined: 7/3/2009
Msg: 397
That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Page 9 of 23    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23)


This is just too silly... Seriously... It's not even worth trying to explain...


Then why edit the post and explain?

I am the one that said you can't add them! How did you get I was saying to add them?


Most men, most women, who marry, stay married. Most men, most women, marry in their teens and twenties, a time for most singles when "a dinner date" means a shared pizza.


I gues the word "most" needs to be defined.

Here are some stats for the US.

According to enrichment journal on the divorce rate in America:
The divorce rate in America for first marriage is 41%
The divorce rate in America for second marriage is 60%
The divorce rate in America for third marriage is 73%


There is where you first posted the stats you are saying the word most needs ti be defined. Now seeing as he said that "most" people stay married....the only reason to define the word most would be if you disagreed. Seeing as the stats you posted affirm his statement the only reason to post them is you thought second and thirds counted twice.....As the 59% that stays married is most no matter what happens to the ones that are divorced.

Sorry but your attempt at using the stats to show most divorce failed.....And if you weren't trying to do that why question the word "MOST"?

Now please let this rest and get back on topic!
 cap_n_mORGAN
Joined: 7/3/2009
Msg: 398
That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 12/6/2010 8:02:51 PM

Me thinks you assume way too much...

I was just trying to quantify the word "most".

It appears to be 41 % divorce rate for first marriages.
By ricochet , 59 % stay married.
So for first marriages "most" is equal to 59 %

It appears to be 61 % divorce rate for second marriages. (An OTHER group)
By ricochet from 39 % stay married.
So for those that marry a second time, "most" is equal to 39 %.


Sorry but the fact you seem to be missing is that seeing as a majority stay married the first time. Even if 99% of second, third and forth marriages end in divorce then the percentage that stays married grows not shrinks!

See the fact you tried to get by the fact that most stay married shows your slant of the stats!

Please let this drop as you have failed to show a majority divorce no matter the times they have been married!!!
 cap_n_mORGAN
Joined: 7/3/2009
Msg: 399
That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 12/6/2010 8:19:19 PM
I am done as I showed the last statement you made that a majority of second and third divorces could never add up to a majority of divorces overall. That was the original statement and it was true!
Now I am done with your fallacious stats!
 WaywardWynde
Joined: 5/19/2007
Msg: 400
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That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 12/6/2010 9:27:57 PM
okay, okay, okay. follow the bouncing ball.

Of 100,000 people who marry, 59% stay married.

Of the 41,000 who divorced, _some_ unstated percentage married a second time. Just for kicks and likely more or less accurate, let's say that 30% of them (30% of 41% of 100,000, or about 12,000) remarried.

Of THAT 12,000, 40% stayed married, about 4,800 people.

Of the 7,200 who divorced a second time, let's say 5% (about 360) remarried.

Of those 360, 90 stayed married.

Let's add 'em up. Of 100,000 who married once, 59,000 plus 4,800 who married a second time, plus 90 who married a 3rd time stayed married in the end.

No matter how YOU count, 63,000 out of 100,000 _IS_ "most" to me.

Given YOUR figures, I hope you don't mind very much if I stick by my statement that most who marry, stay married.
 JSNC7
Joined: 10/31/2010
Msg: 401
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That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 12/7/2010 3:57:26 AM
" I think I would prefer to change the sex appeal to the "IT" factor. "

That's a good way of stating it.

Decades ago, in the 1920's, there was Clara Bow, who was The' IT ' Girl. There was a movie called IT, with Clara Bow. She was a Natural Sex Symbol.

You Tube has Free Clara Bow Videos. Enjoy!
 daffie
Joined: 5/21/2010
Msg: 402
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That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 12/7/2010 4:38:12 AM
omg, this is such a hoot!...

ww says,
..."(*)Hot men who in fact are gay or partially gay..."

he doesn't elaborate which part that may be.
because of this irrational statement it's obvious he is also a homophobic.

omg,
surely not?
a "not hot" right wing homophobic on the loose?...
 WaywardWynde
Joined: 5/19/2007
Msg: 403
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That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 12/7/2010 7:19:01 AM
It's amusing to see the painful looking contortions some will go through to justify as moral the fleecing of some poor schmuck out of a bunch of expensive dinners.

A little piece of trivia from a psychologist friend: 40% of the marks of high end gigolo's were once sex workers themselves.
 JSNC7
Joined: 10/31/2010
Msg: 404
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That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 12/7/2010 8:06:57 AM
..."(*)Hot men who in fact are gay or partially gay..."

In the same message, numbered 475, ww asked, "Want more opinions?" Is that one of them ?

Over and over, I'm gonna be saying Brenton Woods's ," Oogam Boogam " Spell in reverse, to cleanse my poor computer screen !

To each his or her own. But to ME, ww's quote about men is NOT sexually appealing.

( Once again, Sexually Appealing, means SEX APPEAL, not SEX ACT ) Appealing is not the same as ACTING on that appeal.
 JSNC7
Joined: 10/31/2010
Msg: 405
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That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 12/7/2010 8:22:42 AM
" (*) Hot men who in fact are gay or partially gay ahhhhhhhh ...."

Quoting ww's previous, very generous offer...." would you mind very much if you were asked, in the spirit of this dating site, to take your political views somewhere else?"

Is he going to include this very generous offer that he made to THREE people, to himself ?
 WaywardWynde
Joined: 5/19/2007
Msg: 406
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That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 12/7/2010 8:26:21 AM
^^^ Men who are not sexually appealing buy pricey dinners for just met women because that is the surest way to keep some small percentage of just met women hanging around for a couple hours at a time.

I have had women tell me they absolutely refuse -- from hard experience -- to go on a "fine dining" dinner date with a man they just met, for such men are less than pleasant company and have a cash transaction mentality that causes the hair to stand up on the back of the neck.

YMMV.

BTW,a statement that _some_ men whom women find "hot" are gay or partially guy is not a political statement at all. That such men _sometimes_ take care to be frequently seen in public with a woman to stiffle rumors is so common it is a cliche. Ever notice the guy in the office who is always forever telling everyone in earshot about his latest?
 Arlo_Troutman
Joined: 9/26/2009
Msg: 407
That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 12/14/2010 11:07:48 AM
(ConsensualViolation) it's sad that people are willing to flex ethics and morals over a goddamn dinner.


People don't "flex (their) ethics and morals over a goddamn dinner". If they'll accept a dinner under deceptive circumstances, those are their morals. A liar's a liar's a liar...

Dr. ES...
 JSNC7
Joined: 10/31/2010
Msg: 408
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That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 12/18/2010 12:16:25 PM
Some people date just to have company. Nothing sexually expected, or desired. Others have company and don't want to date. Personally, I've never been in that position, but I wonder how many people have.
 JSNC7
Joined: 10/31/2010
Msg: 409
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That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 1/2/2011 2:31:59 AM
According to at least 2 studies, MOST people will lie to impress, and they lie in routine conversation. There are so many things that attract one person to another, but if most people lie, it's no wonder that so many profiles state.. NO LIARS!

Lying is a total turn off to me, and I no longer find that person appealing, nor sexually appealing.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 410
That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 1/2/2011 11:49:03 AM

However, if you want to get to know the person behind the mask, go have a few drinks, shoot pool, and sing karaoke.

Or do some volunteer work together,or attend an auction, or even whitewash the chicken coop or dip sheep....
However, in my neck of the woods and demographics, dinner or dinner and a movie are still reasonably common dates. And some people DO date more for company than for the interest of forging a pair-bond. Other people look to get a sexual liason going ASAP without undue effort and expense. When 2 people of like minds manage to get together, its' a beautiful thing, whether it's a white wedding or a comfortable FwB. The problem is tha minds can tend to be fluid things and they don't always stay in the same paradigm. Add in a few people whose minds ARE permanently set in obtaining,as "inexpensively"(in terms of not just money, but emotion, effort, time,etc)all the gratifications they believe they are by Gawd ENTITLED to, and you have a game in which the only rule seems to be "Carry out your own dead". Which often seems to be EXACTLY what dating has evolved to.
As for the whole statistics thing, I believe it's reasonably safe to say that they seem to indicate that about half of marriages/committed relationships will FORMALLY fail, and that many which remain technically intact really are held together by the emotional equivalents of baling twine, 14gauge fence wire and duct tape. It sounds like stats pretty strongly indicate that there is a nearly 50% rate of infidelity. One ought to look at this and wonder why in the WORLD does anybody want to date! But yet we persist in this foolishness,even people who've done a pair-bond or 2, raised some offspring and ought to know better!-keep looking for whatever the hell it is they
ARE looking for(this varies from person to person!),despite the dubious odds.
Are we all just awesome or are we all just nutcases???
Cindy O
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 411
That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 1/3/2011 9:43:15 AM

In a current thread, many women have been jumping all over a man who had wined and dined a woman for awhile, because was complaining that she didn't give him sex.

As well they should, for the same reason they should jump all over women who have sex to obtain a relationship. If what you want is dinner, have dinner. If you want sex, don't try to get it by wining and dining someone. Make it clear that dating involves sex. If you want to pay for sex, find someone who will acomodate that.

Most women DO put a lot of effort into getting ready for a date... they use make up, wear bras to show maximum breast appeal, dye their hair, and look as appealing as they can for a man.

So? When I got ready for dates, I shaved, took a shower, put on dress slacks and a dress shirt, used deoderant and a little cologne, brushed my hair (what's left of it), and in general tried to be as appealing as possible. Since setting up a date requres some effort, I would think most men and women with at least average intelligence make some effort to appeal to their date, so as to not squander the effort put into setting it up.

My opinion is that any woman who's surprised, and angry that a man who's been wining and dining her for awhile might likely anticipate having sex with her, isn't living in the real world for this date and age.

My opinion is that any woman who is surprised and angry that a man might anticipate having sex with her regardless of where they go on a date, is probably not living in the real world. On the other hand, I think a guy who expects buying dinner to entitle him to sex is not living in the real world either.

In this day and age, most men anticipate having sexual relations with a woman that they have been wining and dining, within a month or 2.

A month or 2? If you haven't had sex within month or 2, then you should consider each other friends without benefits.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 412
That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 1/3/2011 9:53:30 AM
I know several couples who did not have sex before marriage, so they definitely were not in the friend zone only, and know at least 3 couples right now who are dating and either are waiting to have sex until they are sure the relationship is serious. I have accepted the fact that these people are in the minority, but why is it so difficult for some POF posters to seemingly accept the fact that these situations do exist, the people can be happy dating or might eventually marry and have a good sex life, even though they did not have premarital sex.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 413
That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 1/3/2011 10:02:36 AM
^^^ Men who are not sexually appealing buy pricey dinners for just met women because that is the surest way to keep some small percentage of just met women hanging around for a couple hours at a time.

Sexually appealing to who? There are examples of stunning women with men I wouldn't find sexually appealing in droves. Doesn't mean to another woman that that particular man isn't sexually appealing ~ means he's not to me.

I have had women tell me they absolutely refuse -- from hard experience -- to go on a "fine dining" dinner date with a man they just met, for such men are less than pleasant company and have a cash transaction mentality that causes the hair to stand up on the back of the neck.

And there are very likely just as many women who do go on fine dining first dates, they just aren't talking to you. And I'd question many of those talking to you meet/date just about anyone. If you have a some length of communication and a few pictures (if dating online), wouldn't it seem logical that the hair would stand up prior to being in the same room with someone??? (Not always, of course, the definitely a very high percentage of the time.) If not? Someone is meet/greeting without much knowledge of the other person and in that situation? She should be paying for her own dinner ~ or coffee, since that seems ever so popular these days.


BTW,a statement that _some_ men whom women find "hot" are gay or partially guy is not a political statement at all. That such men _sometimes_ take care to be frequently seen in public with a woman to stiffle rumors is so common it is a cliche. Ever notice the guy in the office who is always forever telling everyone in earshot about his latest?

Partially gay?? WTF??
 JSNC7
Joined: 10/31/2010
Msg: 414
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That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 1/3/2011 7:25:48 PM
In this day and age, most men anticipate having sexual relations with a woman that they have been wining and dining, within a month or 2.

" A month or 2? If you haven't had sex within month or 2, then you should consider each other friends without benefits. "

Based on WHAT ? Your extensive knowledge of a previous relationship that I had years ago ?

There are no standard rules for when a couple has sex, in the time frame that you imply. Just because a couple doesn't have sex within a month, doesn't necessarily make them friends without benefits. Each relationship defines itself.

I'm sure that I am hardly the only man on earth who mutually decided with their partner to sexually hold back on having sex for the first month. At no point did she or I ever consider each other friends without benefits. It became a long term relationship that included sex, that lasted for years.

So, according to you, couples who decide to wait until Marriage to have sex, should be considered friends without benefits ? Where do you come up with these statements ? Are you perhaps a Comedy Writer ? A very recent study that was in the news, shows that couples that have sex too early in their relationship, had the least desireable results.

It just amazes me how some people will make statements, state their opinions as facts or mandates, and attempt to pass themselves off as a knowledgeable authority, based on whatever their biased opinion happens to be.

Original thread : Had this woman wanted to hold off sexually longer than we did, I would have found it less than appealing, as in lack of sex appeal for me.
 ikebiker
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 415
That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 1/3/2011 8:26:42 PM
I think there is some truth to the concept of "this day and age," mostly that I am out of date. It is funny how women react when first dating. One woman I made a comment of innuendo just kidding around. After our first coffee she lost interest. I somehow got the impression getting to know the person was not the fundamental of the date

Another date I went on was really weird. I knew the woman a little bit from my local community. She was really pretty and a super neat personality. I heard she had been through some bad relationships, but didn't know what that meant. We went out on a coffee date and here personality was totally different. Very disengaging in conversation. I think because she was very pretty, she was expecting the heavy hitter and not someone that wanted to get to know her better. Sad.



The only man I ever allowed to "wine and dine" me was my ex-husband... after we were married.

Problem solved.


Exactly. Men should save their wallets for marriage.


I was in a relationship some years back where the "wining and dining" came after we fell in love. It is so much nicer to spend the time, money, and charm on someone you really care about. It is also great when the other person loves receiving something from you, and there is more emphasis on "you" than the "something".
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 416
That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 1/4/2011 12:33:56 AM

Based on WHAT ?

I'm omniscient.

Are you perhaps a Comedy Writer ?

When I'm provided with funny material, sure.

A very recent study that was in the news, shows that couples that have sex too early in their relationship, had the least desireable results.

Yet another source you can't reference?
 JSNC7
Joined: 10/31/2010
Msg: 417
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That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 1/4/2011 4:33:41 AM
A very recent study that was in the news, shows that couples that have sex too early in their relationship, had the least desireable results.

" Yet another source you can't reference? "

It's not that I can't, it's that YOU WON'T.

" I'm omniscient. "

Is that another definition for lazy ? Or does it mean one who think they know it all , who can't back up their OPINIONS with references and research ?

Original Thread : I find that anyone who needs to depend on others for things that they will not do themselves, is just as unappealimg to me as someone that I would have to burp and feed.
 good_catch77
Joined: 3/28/2007
Msg: 418
That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 1/4/2011 7:49:30 AM
I'm the type of person that is a number's cruncher in my world of work...but when it comes to dating and real life I am the complete opposite... I don't like to put a number on any thing. I don't "expect" sexual intercourse by the 3rd, 5th, 7th, 9th, etc date. But I agree with some of the posts. I don't date my friends, if a woman just wants to be friends with me fine, let me know and allow me to move on. Don't lead me on and allow me to take you out just because you can.

Some people like to start out as friends and I was, hence the WAS one of them. It never worked for me. But if that is the intentions of the woman hey have that little talk with us...

"I just want to start out as friends and take it slow" type of talk. Most guys would be willing to do that. But most guys would want to know this, some guys think the sexual act is what completes the relationship...until that happens your just a woman he sees. Once sex happens then you are in a relationship...

Now on the flip side I can see a woman getting upset at the guy if all he was trying to do is to get in her pants and then leave her. "Love and leave em" is what its commonly referred to. I would get upset too if a woman did the same to me.

But if she leads the man on and then gets upset when the sex subject comes about then I don't fault the guy, but the woman because she lead him on...

I agree about with the OP which is probably long gone btw, that's why its called SEX APPEAL, if you don't (man or woman) want sex with the person then don't dress that way or act that way to lead the other person on.
 JSNC7
Joined: 10/31/2010
Msg: 420
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That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 1/10/2011 2:25:40 PM
" Don't blame this "date and age" for your or his lack of morals. Not all men expect sexual favors as a part of dating. With STD's and so many people with extreme personality disorders, sleeping with someone within 30-60 days is not only stupid but dangerous.
Your free and easy way of thinking may have been "cool" a generation ago, but these days, sex with the wrong person can cause life-long damage, if not death. Men who think like you are as common as dirt. Some women are seeking more evolved, intelligent men with stronger character. "

I'd like to see some documented research that backs up your OPINION, ( which in MY opinion, was an emotional outburst/ attack ) that, "Men who think like you are as common as dirt." And that, " Some women are seeking more evolved, intelligent men with stronger character. "
 BLoNde__ANgeL
Joined: 9/20/2011
Msg: 423
That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 11/30/2011 1:44:08 PM

If you want sex and the woman does not then I suggest, you move on. Communicating your needs upfront can save a whole lot of time and expense. No one can take advantage of you without your permission!

agreed, some people allow themselves to be taken advantage off when the other person has "sex appeal"
 Savona
Joined: 11/22/2010
Msg: 424
That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal
Posted: 12/2/2011 5:05:30 PM
What I wouldn't give to meet a man with whom I feel sex appeal connection both ways. Wow
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