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 karma1160
Joined: 6/10/2008
Msg: 39
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?Page 2 of 20    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20)
Well I march to my own drummer and yes this has probably happen to me.
I don't know for sure because no one has said put out or get out but, I did date this professional man who really expected sex by the third date eventhough he professed to not be like that. When this did not happen he never called me again imagine that??

Granted I would like nothing better than to be that close to a person the right person period!

I believe sex is an expression of feeling, that being said I can't possibly know if I have real feelings for someone or am just feeling amorous by the third date.
If someone needs to have have something immediately I suggest they call the red cross relief stand! You won't find my # in the book next to it.
 _SYN_
Joined: 9/20/2009
Msg: 40
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 6:57:49 PM

My question to everyone, MEN AND WOMEN... how would you feel if a potential partner told you, ( or you read in a Forum ) that this person would not wait for sex with you on a 3 rd date ?


For me, sex is a spontaneous sort of thing, not something that is expected or demanded of me if I'm not ready. If on the first date, or second date, this person came right out and voiced their intentions, I would express my lack of interest in being with someone who thinks in this manner, tell them to have a nice life, and say goodbye. If it was an online dating sort of thing that they had posted in a forum or on their profile, I wouldn't even waste my time with them.
 Arabianangel
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 42
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 7:02:46 PM

As far as I can tell, it's because people are either mentally managing their fears, or mentally managing their selfishness. In either case, they're certainly not much intrigued nor swept up by the the mystery and the allure of whoever it is they are supposedly charmed by.


Now that's a BIG bon bon
 sinlov
Joined: 2/25/2008
Msg: 43
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A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 7:24:15 PM
Sex as I see it should happen naturally, between two consenting adults 1rst, 12, 24th date, seems todays date scheduled at Holiday Inn even before 1rst mtg. Darn and I really wanted to meet him too. Probably would have went better had he not been sooo optimistic.
 xlr8ingmargo
Joined: 7/28/2009
Msg: 45
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 7:58:38 PM
I'll have to agree with Chances and posted a very similar comment on another thread...
It's just sex and it feel great so do it already and quit making guys wait cause of some stupid rule! OOPPSS... I did say that out loud... Im a chick!
 SASSYN89178
Joined: 2/19/2007
Msg: 46
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A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 10:50:26 PM
MARGO64
It's just sex and it feel great so do it already and quit making guys wait cause of some stupid rule! OOPPSS... I did say that out loud... Im a chick!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Just curious, do you have children?
Would or did you tell them that the age of consent for sex is 18, so do whatever you want?
These guys who you say we shouldn't make wait, what happens when they wonder how many guys you went to bed with. Because, they are thinking geez how many men has she been to bed with.
I'm hoping you get annual blood tests.
 Arabianangel
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 47
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 11:06:52 PM

These guys who you say we shouldn't make wait, what happens when they wonder how many guys you went to bed with. Because, they are thinking geez how many men has she been to bed with.


Sassyn...I know you're asking Margo64, but I couldn't help but wonder why any woman would want to be with a man with such train of thought. I can understand that a woman wants to wait because she wants to feel comfortable before sharing herself intimately with a man, but to FEAR not sharing yourself because of judgment is living a lie.
 Arabianangel
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 49
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/17/2009 2:37:15 AM

I think that you've made an excellent point. Would that not only be living a lie, but also self feeding the oppression that most women have fought to overcome for decades ?


Exactly!




 deerdog1
Joined: 12/29/2006
Msg: 50
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/17/2009 3:35:50 AM
actually I think this whole subject is bull shit ...many especially on POF give lip service to the time line for sex ... but in my experience most people know pretty damn fast whether sex will happen and most are ready for it as soon as they know they want it with the person in question and that is good ... the only people I have issues with are the guys who are hypocrites and judge women when they have sex early ...and I really dont think there are that many of them .. the guys that claim this were really not going to stay any way calling the woman an easy slut just is their exit strategy.... I do understand the women who hold out from fear of this ..but chemistry being strong most will give in to sex as soon as they feel the chemistry ... that is why we discuss sex time lines and player threads so much .. I have dated many women and not all resulted in sex ...but all the ones that did ..resulted in sex on the first or second date .... I cant remember ever having a third date unless sex had already happened including my two wives ... actually my first wife ..we had sex on the first date ..but we had both just been in a using relationship ..so we decided not to have sex any more for a while ..(my idea).. we dated for five months before we had sex again ...we made it to within a week of our marriage before we had sex again ...we are still friends
 Bluesman2008
Joined: 4/2/2008
Msg: 51
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/17/2009 3:49:55 AM

I'd be ok with that as long as I got a back rub and a shoe shine.


and maybe validate parking?
 xlr8ingmargo
Joined: 7/28/2009
Msg: 52
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/17/2009 6:09:04 AM
To Sassy- Honey I'm in health care (now) so I have to whether I want to or not. I've even had shots most people never heard of... I do use protection and see my share of what stupid people physically have done to themselves. I see M.R.S.A. more than I do sexually transmitted diseases; at least 25 cases a day..... I am a Mother and raised two daughters that are now both married. They were both sexually active, on birth control, and using condoms by the age of 16. My one daughter married her first (he's awesome), and the other lived with hers for several years before splitting up, and meeting her husband. How many men have I slept with? That's a different thread lady. Get on that one and read it. The men I've dated have enough self respect and dignity not to ask; neither do I. A number does not define anyone. If you'd get out there and have more sex and enjoy yourself it would not be such an issue for you.
Oh and as posted on other threads... POWER TO THE PEOPLE THAT LIKE TO HAVE SEX
 barbee1970
Joined: 12/29/2008
Msg: 55
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/17/2009 3:53:30 PM
Honestly, I know alot of guys on this sight expect it, but I haven't put out with ANY of them especially in the beginning.

I know they try their make out session, but I don't know enough about them, if they are just looking to lift their leg everywhere, if they are really married, etc.
 COLIONE98
Joined: 9/13/2005
Msg: 57
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A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/17/2009 8:27:39 PM
I personally think there should be a reasonable time table for a normal situation.... so let's say third date.

Now, if there is chemistry and you hit it off, I don't see why 2 consenting adults can't be intimate at their own free will- (understaning that not every encounter has to involve ever lasting love) but many folks get on forums and listen to train wrecks and enlist those ideas and standards into their own causing conflict.

but my rule is this- there are and or should always be 2 keys to a vehicle. that means that neither one of us is in total control. so don't expect me to watch you drive the car and me be a back seat passenger.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 59
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/19/2009 11:20:29 AM
She stated that she expects sex by the end of the 1 st, or 2 nd date.

Lots of men expect the same thing. I think that' s something that's just a given. Part of early dating process is determining, with a degree of grace and class, whether both people are on the same page with regard to sexual intimacy. There is also the person who dates simply to get a sexual itch scratched...and as long as they are upfront,honest and boink responsibly( no unwanted pregnancies or STDs transmitted,please!) that's fine.
But I think we also need to take into account that not ALL dating springs from online dating sites. A man and woman might know each other in real life, so that having sex early in the dating process ISN'T a huge leap. Or they might have been communicating quite awhile before actually meeting...and there is a great deal to be said for the concept of having that first in person meeting NOT be a 'date', rather simply 2 people having coffee or lunch, or getting acquainted in a bookstore or informal music or poetry gathering.
Of course there are double standards about various aspects of dating. Some of them are more noticeable in certain demographic/geographic sectors.
But as far as flaming and setting off fire alarms in PoF, I think most of us GET that people don't generally date one another in order to swap crochet patterns and pickle recipes. And it usually doesn't take any woman with IQ even slightly higher than a fruit bat's,that a lot of men only date to get sex,ASAP. And I think that there is a growing contingent of women who have started to put a lot more emphasis on sex and sexual compatibility, maybe even some who would love to date just to get sex when the itch needed scratched...but because of the double standard, they wouldn't dare SAY SO. I suspect that a lot of them won't even admit to themselves that they envy men who can hit and run, and everybody goes 'yah well...' but if WOMEN started openly dating to hit it and quit it, she'd be labeled as an absolute slut. Double standard? You damn betcha!
Cindy O
 Energizer Bunnies
Joined: 10/15/2009
Msg: 60
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/19/2009 11:23:48 AM
If she was asbolutely serious about this timetable...that would be weird...especially because it means that this her "standard" for all guys she dates.

But if she is really into you, and says it in more flirty fashion (even if deep down she is serious about it) then I would take it as a compliment.
 grizzelda
Joined: 6/25/2006
Msg: 61
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A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/19/2009 11:29:06 AM

If she was asbolutely serious about this timetable...that would be weird...especially because it means that this her "standard" for all guys she dates.


Good Point! And I have no common interest with someone that sees their sexuality that way....
 ItsMargo
Joined: 4/24/2007
Msg: 62
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A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/19/2009 12:26:58 PM
Pulled this from m_church's last post:

The women will be far more picky as to who gets those three dates... Chances are she will place more importance on the actual date and who she is willing to go out with than just dating a guy because he asks and she's free...

That's me. err, was me. I was very willing to meet up with someone who interested me for one date. Worst thing that could happen was an evening of enjoyable conversation (because I would only ever go our with someone where the conversational interest was there). I had a zillion first and second dates because, once I determined I didn't want to get to know this person better, I wouldn't go out with them again. That decision was usually reached within the first couple of dates. Although I sometimes worried was I cutting things off too soon, it just didn't seem fair to continue unless I had some genuine interest in discovering the person.
 xlr8ingmargo
Joined: 7/28/2009
Msg: 64
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/19/2009 2:05:01 PM
Tito you posted the same response on another thread but it still rings true here as well.
Yes that is why condoms are always the option.
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 65
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/19/2009 2:34:54 PM
I'm not a fan of timetables.
I think you know when you're ready to have
sex with someone. It could be on the first date,
the third date, the tenth date...or never.

All moral judgements aside...people should do what
works for them and not worry about what others are
doing. Some of us have raised responsible adults and
we STILL like sex....and hope to have it...maybe even
lots of it.

Does anyone really worry about what others think?
or do they just like appearing virtious and pious and
passing judgement on the sexual escapades of others?

Yeah...I said it...sexual escapades....woot woot!







 xlr8ingmargo
Joined: 7/28/2009
Msg: 66
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/19/2009 3:49:39 PM
I couldn't have said that better myself Miss. Brown Eyes. Thanks for your open minded honesty; it is appreciated by all of us females that feel the same way.
 tnt144
Joined: 10/22/2007
Msg: 68
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/20/2009 8:35:11 AM
The answer is simple... lots of people believe in one-night-stands (or second).

It's called immaturity.
 worldclassman
Joined: 2/7/2009
Msg: 69
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/20/2009 9:50:18 AM
If a chick doesn't toss a leg (or at least get on her knees) by the third date, I'm gone...

Period, end of story...
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 71
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/20/2009 10:13:52 AM

The answer is simple... lots of people believe in one-night-stands (or second).


It's not called immaturity. Actually its a mature person that does something and
recognizes it for what it is and then doesn't judge someone else because they choose
to do otherwise.

Contrary to what some would like to believe...there really isn't anything wrong
with having sex simply because you WANT to.

 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 74
A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/20/2009 11:13:08 AM
No, it is immature... Acting out on desires just because you can is immature.... realising that there could be more to it than a simple fcuk... is mature...
I agree, dogs do it all the time... walk up, sniff butt, and fcuk.... no thought behind it... no worries about consequences...
A lot of people do crack or heroin or kill or rape... society is just that, society... there are the more mature members of society that don't do the baser things, and then there is the 'great unwashed' that do... More people are uneducated than educated.... it explains a lot....
No, we're not, this isn't frakking grade school... What's next? Singing "I know you are, but what am I?" or "Nyah Nyah Nyah"? Give me a break...


Acting out our desires just because you can is immature????
and you are associating having sex with dogs?
and somehow having sex is related to doing crack or heroin or
killing people or raping people?
Well I just don't know what to say.



ps...you know what is immature? copying every single line of a post individually
and responding separately. There should be a "fecking" law. (sorry rockman)
ahahahahahaha!
 Tiredandhaggard1
Joined: 6/11/2009
Msg: 78
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A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/20/2009 12:52:37 PM
If that agenda was on his profile... there would't be a first date.
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