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 Forrest Grump
Joined: 6/2/2007
Msg: 25
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Flirting with Married peoplePage 8 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
OP


I have always flirted with married ladies, and I wondered why this is,


I think you have answered that question in the next sentence -

"I think it may be their unavailability ... - the fact that they are 'safe', that nothing can happen."


Do you think that married people flirt more?


I’ll carry out a survey and get back to you.


Did you flirt more when you were attached?


I don’t think it made a difference.

These comments typify what flirting is all about.

OBird Msg 6 & 16

I flirt outrageously with lots of my married friends.
Like you, OP, I know that there's nothing in it, that it's all in fun only, and that all it does is make us laugh.

Harmless because both parties (and any partners) know that it is unthreatening and completely without malice or intention of anything further developing from it.


Hunnibelle Msg 30

Edit... there is a world of difference between flirting and someone coming onto you. It’s a totally different situation.



Flirting is trying to attract someone sexually but without serious intentions.

If your intentions are serious, it is NOT flirting, nor can it be described as such.

Simples.
 Forrest Grump
Joined: 6/2/2007
Msg: 26
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Flirting with Married people
Posted: 6/8/2011 12:11:09 PM
Zeegary Msg 152


So if they responded in a positive fashion (ie they wished to take it further) the one doing the flirting would rebuff them?


Er….yes, because the one doing the flirting has no serious intentions (of taking it further).

This is the difference between flirting and coming on to someone, or making a move on someone, or indeed, on propositioning someone.

In this case the person would have serious intentions, so the answer to your questions would probably be No.

I hope this explains the position.
 stonecastle
Joined: 2/14/2007
Msg: 27
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Flirting with Married people
Posted: 6/9/2011 4:51:23 AM
Has anyone heard of swingers? They are couples who swap partners regularly. There are several swingers clubs across Britain and some swingers forums on the internet as well.
 Forrest Grump
Joined: 6/2/2007
Msg: 28
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Flirting with Married people
Posted: 6/13/2011 12:39:30 PM
zeegary

Since this subject is concerned with the use of the English language and since
you are quite an expert (albeit self-professed) of same, I would be glad if you could take the time by casting your eye over the following e-mail, which I intend sending.

Dr Mr Oxford

I have long been a fan of your English Dictionary.

In an Internet forum I belong to I gave a definition on the word ‘Flirting’,
‘Flirting is trying to attract someone sexually but without serious intentions’
I even highlighted the latter part of the sentence, as it appeared this was causing problems to some of the forumites.

I was slated by another forumite who insisted that “I don’t know what flirting is!”.
I pointed out that the one doing the flirting has no serious intentions but he insisted that this is wrong.

I felt dejected and humiliated.

I couldn’t sleep and was unable to concentrate at work. At lunchtime I wandered the streets in a state of shock. The next thing I knew I was standing in front of a bookshop.

In a moment of inspiration I headed for the Dictionary section and consulted your excellent book. Suddenly a great weight was lifted from my shoulders as I realised that your definition was exactly the same as mine.

The staff must have thought me potty as I danced about the shop.
In my excitement I almost bought your book.

It is made all the more surprising as this aforementioned forumite is normally an avid fan of your publication, and quotes from it (some might say ‘ad nauseam’), to teach those un-educated amongst us.

He even reminds us -
I don't expect anyone to take my words as 'law', but I do expect them to know what English words mean before they use them.....

And for those who choose not to understand the meaning of words:
"The beginning of wisdom is the definition of terms." (Socrates)

(Sigh) Too true….

All I can say is keep up the good work.

Yours sincerely

Forrest Grump

What do you think?
 Forrest Grump
Joined: 6/2/2007
Msg: 30
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Posted: 6/14/2011 12:04:01 AM
Zeegary Msg158



http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/flirting

"to behave amorously without serious intent "


There is that phrase again. That is 2 dictionary definitions, with which you disagree. It seems quite straightforward to me.

I don’t even have to counter your arguments; you’re doing a great job!

[quoteGood job you didn't waste your money on that incorrect version of the OED!

The Police raided an open-air market just the other week and arrested 3 people for selling illegal cigarettes, fake perfume and dodgy OED!

Shocking!
 Forrest Grump
Joined: 6/2/2007
Msg: 31
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Posted: 6/15/2011 1:21:23 PM
I am quite content that there are two definitions on current OED’s and another based on Merriam-Webster dictionary, which shows that flirting, is ‘without serious intentions’ (or intent).

That’s good enough for me.

Just for a moment leave the first part of the definition and concentrate on the phrase ‘ without serious intentions’.

Imagine that you are out with your husband/wife, girlfriend/boyfriend, partner or friend etc. and they make a joke at your expense.

You say “I’m going to murder you that” (or words to that effect)

Do you really mean that?

No.

You are saying that ‘without serious intent’ or ‘without serious intentions’.

Apply this to flirting.

If you are unable to do so, I would suggest that that you write to the aforementioned publishers.
 try1more
Joined: 12/16/2007
Msg: 32
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Posted: 6/15/2011 8:48:10 PM
gawd it's like watching wimbledon in here at times innit!
anyone fancy a punnet of strawberries?
 Forrest Grump
Joined: 6/2/2007
Msg: 34
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Posted: 7/25/2011 1:50:56 PM
From the only English source worth bothering with.


To behave as though sexually attracted to someone…


You don’t have to be sexually attracted to the person, just behave as though you are.


…but playfully


For amusement, not to be taken seriously.


…rather than with serious intentions.


I have given my explanation in Msg 176 in simple English, with a simple analogy….


Imagine that you are out with your husband/wife, girlfriend/boyfriend, partner or friend etc. and they make a joke at your expense.

You say “I’m going to murder you that” (or words to that effect)

Do you really mean that?

No.

You are saying that ‘without serious intent’ or ‘without serious intentions’.


I take it that those of you say that the intent is still there, may have a skeleton or two in the cupboard…

… or under the patio…

… or buried in the back garden!!!

 ZXTTTT
Joined: 5/10/2010
Msg: 35
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Posted: 7/25/2011 4:36:46 PM
Cam some one teach me this flirting thing please, I would be most greatfull for your efforts.
 fractalena
Joined: 8/16/2010
Msg: 36
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Posted: 7/25/2011 5:29:20 PM
1 - appear interested; if you are genuinely interested, that is a bonus for both of you -cos you won't have to pretend, and you won't be misleading anyone;
2 - a spelling check is always nice; txt spk is cheap...
3 - don't go beyond your comfort level, or you will be disappointed
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