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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?      Home login  
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 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 126
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?Page 6 of 21    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21)

I agree that it is not only women who embellish or lie but I'm sure that on the subject of hair color that more women lie than men. If you say you are a blonde then that should mean what your natural hair color is, not what it is presently dyed to be. How many women on POF would fail that simple question?

That could be ~ but I'll bet just as many men lie about actually HAVING hair as women who "lie" about the color. If you really think that is a lie, what do you think of cosmetic dental work (men and/or women.) What about flattering clothing? I mean shouldn't everyone just wear gunny sacks, or better yet, nude. I mean clothes can hide things that nakedness can't. (Seriously Man, that comment was grasping ~ at best.) JMO
 Rarebird76
Joined: 5/10/2009
Msg: 127
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/2/2010 6:38:01 PM
If elected prezzident I would instate 'honesty week'. Men and women would be given gov issued shirts with verified accurate age and weight printed on them that they would have to wear for the week when in public. It'd be the most humiliating week ever!!!! Humble pie served for all!!! Come back down to EARTH....no where to hide!!!! Do I sound like a fun prezzydant?



 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 128
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/2/2010 8:28:00 PM

Hmmm....I agree with your logic. I like the way you think, my dear. Care to start a new trend :)

As long as you aren't lying about your age (like you are really 28 or something).
 Applette
Joined: 4/13/2007
Msg: 129
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History
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/3/2010 4:01:17 AM
LISTEN UP PEOPLE!

People lie about a lot of different things for a lot of different reasons! They did an documentary on the subject ... BOTTOM LINE ... don't throw stones unless you have never lied about a single thing!

Think about it ........ I WILL BET MY LAST LOONIE ON THE FACT that everyone at sometime has told a lie ......... does that make you a bad person?

According to all the young guys who hit on me, age is just a number! And they know how old I am because it is in my profile. And I know what they want .... so being honest about it ... does not seem to matter to some .......

So the next time you are a little hungover ..... or too tired to go to work ... don't phone into work and tell em your sick or your favorite Aunt just died!

Chow!
 platypus_man
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 130
view profile
History
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/3/2010 7:42:40 AM
I really wonder about this. I suppose, well, that perhaps people change their age so they meet people who are more likely to be interested in the same things they are. Couch potatoes might make themselves a bit older, athletes may make themselves a bit younger. Or maybe it's more about where you are in life; if you're willing to start a family and you're a guy, listing yourself at 45 will severely limit your possibilities. And then you run into familial longevity too. If everyone in your family dies in their 50's, then maybe looking to marry someone younger isn't a real good idea. Or if everyone lives to 100, marrying someone whose family all dies at 65 won't work either.

Basically, look at the whole person. Age is just a number. Cutting off at any particular age and you might just miss out on someone one month too old but perfect for you in every other way. JMHO.
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 131
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/3/2010 11:15:19 AM
I don't go through life lying because it's easier.
If you call not saying something lying...then I might be a liar by
your standards, but I don't say something instead...I just say
nothing at all.
I have no problem calling out of work by just saying " I won't be
in today, I'll see you tomorrow". I don't come out and tell someone
they look hideous in something, but I would suggest they try
something else.
I don't agree with people when they say they are fat by saying
you're right...you're a fat ugly cow and no one will ever love you...
I say you need to lose weight, I'm concerned about your health.
I totally avoid lying.
People hate it when others lie about their weight and height, I'm
not sure why age is getting a free ride here. A lie is a lie when you
go out of your way to intentionally deceive someone into thinking
something else.
I fail to see the problem here.
I also resent the implication by some that EVERYONE lies.
No. Not everybody lies. You apparently do, but please don't use
me to justify the acceptance of your lies.
 bo_weeks
Joined: 1/5/2009
Msg: 132
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/3/2010 12:27:50 PM
post 265

I'm honest to a fault.


There is not fault in honesty...ever
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 133
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/3/2010 1:05:17 PM

Basically, look at the whole person. Age is just a number. Cutting off at any particular age and you might just miss out on someone one month too old but perfect for you in every other way. JMHO.


I agree age is just a number.
If people really believed that...why would they lie about just a number?
It's more accepting to accept a lie than to bear the truth?
People lie about their age in order to deceive....when there is no need.
 Rarebird76
Joined: 5/10/2009
Msg: 134
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/3/2010 2:08:04 PM

I have the same problem I put my real age in there and they match me with women who I would never have anything in common with. I'm 42 and and have put 38 in for my age and get match with more compatible people. so it's not just him I'm not saying that I wouldn't date a woman my age at all but when all I get is women who at in there 50s its a little hard to find things in common.
You aren't required by POF law to date those in your "matches". There is an "advanced search" option on this site. Put in the exact parameters you are looking for! What happened to brainpower/effort? I feel like smacking myself repeatedly just to distract from my involuntarily melted brain cells.
 sosdd
Joined: 12/14/2009
Msg: 135
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/3/2010 2:58:59 PM
My sister was on here and lied about her age. Geez, came from the same family, you would think we had the same values, guess not.

Lying about age, height, weight, just aren't acceptable. Proof of life photos are important and you can tell some things, but dang, having to card your dates sucks. I don't care if someone lied about 1" or 1 year, they weren't secure enough with themselves and had to lie. Liars suck!
 jaksprat
Joined: 12/21/2007
Msg: 136
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/3/2010 11:31:48 PM
Is that all you got to worry about. Women lie about their age all the time, so what. Enjoy the moment and be glad it's nothing serious like warts or HIV.
POF does not allow you to update your age so I and probably countless others are forever young unless we cancel our membership and reapply.

If it bothers you so much break of the "friendship" and find a guy that will show you his driver license to prove his age. You will be at ease and never ever suspect that everything else about him is a big fat lie.

No wonder my friends prefer to stay single.
 sosdd
Joined: 12/14/2009
Msg: 137
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/4/2010 4:21:55 AM

No wonder my friends prefer to stay single.
Because they are liars? Ya know I sure as heck don't ever want to date someone that doesn't know the basics of entering their birthday. I can not believe this bull crap of ummm, I can't change the date, well, why did you enter your wrong birth date?

You don't know your height, well goodness, put a mark on your wall and find out. 6' isn't 5'9"!

You don't know how much you weigh, buy a scale and stand on it. Then check your height with your weight, unless you are a body builder or other fitness type person, your bmi will tell you if you are obese, underweight or, where you should be. Take that to mean that if you are obese, you are not a few extra pounds or athletic but bbw. If you exercise all the time and don't have a stomach hanging in front of you, you probably are athletic. I don't care if you bike ride every day, if you look pregnant and are a man, your body isn't an athletic build.

Hey, look in that mirror, see the gray, that means your hair is no longer brown, black or whatever.

Use some reality. Don't lie. You only hurt yourself because guess what, I know many people don't want to deal with people that can't be truthful about OBVIOUS things.
 Frybreadpower
Joined: 10/10/2008
Msg: 138
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/4/2010 4:28:44 AM
Yah, that's a good idea about asking to see people's drivers licenses. You can't do that online, but if you meet in person it would work. Hypothetically, what if they wink at you when they lie about their age? Does that count as a lie? Just wondering... LOL! -D.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 139
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/4/2010 4:33:12 AM

I'm 42 and and have put 38 in for my age and get match with more compatible people. so it's not just him I'm not saying that I wouldn't date a woman my age at all but when all I get is women who at in there 50s its a little hard to find things in common. So Don't worry about him say he was younger I an honst guy and the only thing I didn't truthfully state was my age for that exact reason. But I usually tell the women I date as soon as possible like within the fisrt 2 dates.

Oy! Why is it so difficult for some people to understand this???? Why would anyone want to "trick" someone into being interested in them? If you don't want to meet women in their 40s, do the logical thing: put a restriction in your profile that is age-sensitive. I have one in mine. Nothing wrong with personal preferences, there is something wrong with lying. JMO
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 140
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/4/2010 5:27:35 AM

well miss verygreeneyez
if i lust for your body i could not write.... just be sad for i was born in 52

Just because you might lust, doesn't mean I would. (Hence? Age restriction.)

but should i crave your favors.... then 1970 on my profile should get your juices flowing
so it seem your answer to questions asked years ago is flawed
as is your restriction a guarantee the meat you buy is as fresh as advertised...

Sorry to disappoint you ~ 1970 wouldn't get you anywhere with me. That's ENTIRELY too young ~ as my profile clearly states. Just because YOU don't like my logic doesn't mean it's flawed, as the ONLY person who needs to understand my logic is ME. The only meat I trust fresh enough for me? Within a year or two of my own age. That meat? Aged just like me. Like I said, personal preferences are a wonderful thing.
 sosdd
Joined: 12/14/2009
Msg: 141
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/4/2010 6:58:56 AM

It is commonly accepted that lying about one's age is a white-lie.
By whom, other liars? If you check the thread, the person lied about other things. That has been my experience. If people lie before you know them about the little things that are facts, they are sure to lie further. The lies in the begining may not be hurtful, but they get that way.
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 142
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/4/2010 9:49:41 AM

There are instances where it's beneficial to the relationship. This is deceit for the greater good. There are even scenarios where lying is actually more moral than telling the truth. If you like me to name a few scenarios, I could list a few though I'm certain you can think of some on your own..


So in what scenario would lying about one's age be more moral than telling the truth?
I also think people have to remember where we are. We're on a dating site...where
lies are notorious. People lie about their height, weight, age, number of children,
marital status and hair follicles. Why would ANYONE be surprised that someone
is upset about a lie on a profile or in a meeting?
This is certainly not an instance where lying is beneficial to a relationship.
Maybe I've been around too long, but in my experience? People who lie about
little things and can justify them, tend to lie about bigger things. Where do you
draw the line? At what point do you say this lie is okei but this lie isn't?

Oh what a complicated web we weave comes to my mind.

 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 143
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/4/2010 10:19:56 AM
So basically you're saying it's okei to lie about your age so someone who
would normally fall out of your age range would agree to meet you because
it might be in her best interests as you could be her soul mate.
So you are starting off your relationship with your soul mate based on a lie.
If you're lying to deceive someone into thinking you're something that you are
not...I don't see how it's helping the relationship.
You're taking a chance that the person you meet is going to be blown away
by your charming personality and is going to forget the fact that you lied.
I don't think it's really worth it myself. I'd rather tell (and know) the truth
up front and then let me decide if I want to meet you or not.

But different strokes for different folks I guess.
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 144
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/4/2010 11:11:16 AM
There are so many women on POF who lie about there age it`s not funny! yet, it`s accepted and simply looked as "She`s looking" for younger men"..
I don`t quite get the logic of many of you.If the man is respectable, treats you like a women, show`s kindness and love, whats the point of condemning this man?


No one is disputing that women lie as well.
Some people (including myself) have posted over and over that lying
about one's age is not acceptable. I'm not sure where you're getting the idea
that it's okei for women to lie and not men?
Some people have their own criteria for meeting people.
Starting a relationship based on a lie or a deceit is just not something
everyone subscribes to.

Methinks you protest too much. Did you perchance shave a few years off your
age? :o)
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 145
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/4/2010 1:05:37 PM
Age isn't important to me either.
That's why I don't understand people
lying about it.
If it's not such a big deal...why lie about it?
Whoops...apparently it is a big deal to some.
I'm interested to know though...if you met someone
who was heavier than they expressed in their profile,
would you also be as forgiving?
 Frybreadpower
Joined: 10/10/2008
Msg: 146
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/4/2010 1:11:12 PM
This thread is interesting on a few levels. I agree that lying about your age is a manipulative act, but at the same time, it's such a common thing, and a cliche, that it's the norm in America. The end result of this cliche is that for the sake of being chivalrous, guys don't get all bent out of shape when women lie about their age. There are responses from both guys and girls on this thread who think that lying about your age is absolutely wrong, but it seems to me that more of these responses are from girls. (but I didn't count, so I could be wrong). What that implies to me is that it's okay for girls to lie about their age, but not for guys to reciprocate. Who makes these rules? Frankly, I agree with the poster who said that this is really a non-issue. IMO, if someone lies about their age it's not the end of the world, but it gets tricky when they start fabricating other parts of their life to make that lie believable. In other words, (IMO) it's a white lie if someone lies about their age when they meet for the first time as long as they fess up to it soon after that. But if they go the other route - if they build a whole web of lies to back up their fake age, then that's screwed up.

For those of you who don't want to date age-liars, just look up your potential mates on Classmates.com (or whatever it's called now). You can't lie about the year you graduated... LOL! Or check out their drivers license. You might want to give them a chance to fess up before you do that, though. And if they don't fess up, then they really are a liar.

Enjoy!

-Daniel
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 147
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/4/2010 1:13:40 PM
Yeppers...I got you there...but not to worry...I've let you go!

hehehehehehe! It's all good.
 Frybreadpower
Joined: 10/10/2008
Msg: 148
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/4/2010 1:46:09 PM
The number difference between years - 10 years - 20 years- etc... - doesn't matter. The thing that matters is that they fess up to it without trying to continue the lie. I have friends that are in their teens all the way up to their 80's. Not that I'd want to date a teenager or someone in her 80's, but in theory, if a person can be friends with people of all ages, then why can't they have significant others of other ages? That's a separate issue than the whole age-lying thing. Really, I think that about 1/5 of women over 35 years old lie about their age. -D.
 Rarebird76
Joined: 5/10/2009
Msg: 149
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/4/2010 4:28:25 PM
Hey, maybe POF should just remove the age (and height & body type) fields? Just let people guess and those who want to lie can say whatever they want and see if someone buys it. That way I can look at somones pic and say 'you don't really look 38 then they can counter back 'yes I am' Then I can say 'well you don't look like it'. Then they can say 'f..k you' then I can can say 'hey how can I trust anybody on here?' Then they can say 'you can trust me'. Then I can say 'how'? Then they can say ' I don't lie'. Then I can say....'mmmmm you sound sincere but IDK' Then they can say 'fine you don't believe me?....f..k off' Then I can say 'it's hard to tell your body type from your pics' Then they can say "I'm average' Then I can say 'ok I'm convinced....when would you like to meet'? Then they can say 'how bout I just send my friend who will pretend to be me' Then I can say 'ok sounds cool...will you be hiding nearby or no?' Then they can say 'IDK how bout we keep it a mystery' Then I can say 'alright, sounds good, it's a date'

*match made in heaven*
 sosdd
Joined: 12/14/2009
Msg: 150
He lied about his age...only by two years....should i be concerned?
Posted: 2/5/2010 5:22:44 AM

Frankly, I think it's a little more absurd to believe that even a white-lie is so destructive and so immoral that you should have to forego the relationship altogether rather than simply look over it. You're only making yourself a victim.

There is nothing white about it, lying about your age, weight, height, hair, etc. are lies used to deceive someone into thinking you are someone you are not. They steal time that you have! They steal your thoughts, hopes, and dreams that this might be the one. Immoral as heck to do such things! It is wrong! There is no gray area. You have a birth date, you have a height, you have a weight, you have a hair color or no hair, and if you lie about it, you are lying period. You are purposely trying to deceive another person. There is no way there could be a date let alone a relationship with such an immoral person! They certainly are victimizing you! Don't kid yourself into thinking there is nothing wrong with this, it is very wrong. If you only email or date one person at a time and there is someone that really is who they say they are and you are wasting your time on the liar, that liar has taken your possible future from you.

Liars SUCK!
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