Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Single Parents  > Multiple children by multiple partners      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 NorthernBell
Joined: 11/11/2009
Msg: 151
Multiple children by multiple partnersPage 7 of 12    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12)
I love your answer to that "question". You're absolutely right. Life happens and it's not always good.
 singlesuperdad
Joined: 8/26/2009
Msg: 152
view profile
History
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 11/17/2009 5:44:50 PM
I have 4 kids, by me and the forth is not. I have raised her as myown since she was six (now13). I treat her no different than my bio-kids and now that their mom is gone that hasn't changed a thing. I guess it's about the situation and not the fact that they are by different parents.
 lonleycdn
Joined: 3/13/2008
Msg: 153
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 11/17/2009 9:27:38 PM
Heres an answer to why guys are morons when it comes to being responsible about taking precautions. God gave us two heads, but only enough blood pressure to use one at a time

I have 5 children. 1 came as a package with her mother. we had 3 more together. after 23 years she decided that since my job kept me away from home alot, she would find a new pony to ride. I was singlr for two years and found a gf. she had a little boy. after we were together for a year she got preggers accidently. she was on the pill so i dont know how that happened. at 5 months she decided she didnt want to keep our child and intended to give up for adoption. i said no way so she walked. found out later she did the same thing to her sons father.
i try not to judge women because they have children. I love kids and actually look at them as a bonus in many ways. I know that i have it in me to be a good father as i have been told that i am a great dad by my other kids. Our house was always full of kids and friends. There are a lot of women out ther that have kids, maybe by different fathers. that doesnt mean they are bad nor does it mean the fathers were bad. it just means that they now find themselves in a less than perfect situation. I have always tried not to judge people by ther past and that went for gf's as well. I will try to judge them by what they are or we are like together. it take 2 to tango and 2 to mess things up
 NappyKAT
Joined: 7/2/2008
Msg: 154
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 11/18/2009 11:55:26 AM
I heard of this one chick who had multiple kids by multiple men of different races. Her first marriage didn't work out, and apparently she didn't learn from her mistake the first time because she winded up in another dead end marriage. Afterwards she was single and at some point she even had to get foodstamps. She bounced her kids all around the friggin country trying to land a man and I guess get educated somewhere along the way.

Somebody needs to tell Obama's momma that it just ain't cool or respectful to be on a welfare program and have multiple kids with multiple daddies. She might lose the respect of some complete meaningless strangers. What the hell kind of example was she setting for her kids? Why didn't she give more forethought to the her husbands and/or sperm donors to have a more lasting relationship? Boy I can't wait to see how her kids grow up and turn out
 RLFish
Joined: 8/21/2009
Msg: 155
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 11/18/2009 12:34:57 PM

Is she one of those children in your profile pics?


Ouch.

I guess ultimately, we will all think what we think, as is our prerogative. I think negatively about women who do not have their children, as I cannot understand how a woman decides to just let them go?! (I know someone who says, "boys belong with their father"...bullhickey! Children belong with the best parent or a combo of such!) That's ME. I also think men (or anyone for that matter!) who produce offspring but are not active in their lives, are disgusting. I think people who claim to be single parents just because they are not married...who still hand kids over to another parent or have shared parenting with someone, are not TRUE single parents. And lastly, I think anyone without children has zero concept of parenthood & the family values that I have. Therefore I date NONE of the above.

However, there ARE exceptions to all of the above...just generally speaking, from my personal experiences...they are slim.
 NappyKAT
Joined: 7/2/2008
Msg: 156
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 11/18/2009 1:05:50 PM

Therefore I date NONE of the above.

And let the church say 'Amen' and HalleLUJAH!'

asaucawaleahsoeelioh bucasana ahominabuchee danielocoolrahskii copencheck

(speakin 'nem tongues! speakin'nem tongues!)

HALLELUJAH! PRAISE THE LORD!!
 itsallinthesoul
Joined: 6/26/2009
Msg: 157
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 11/18/2009 1:21:41 PM

I heard of this one chick who had multiple kids by multiple men of different races. Her first marriage didn't work out, and apparently she didn't learn from her mistake the first time because she winded up in another dead end marriage. Afterwards she was single and at some point she even had to get foodstamps. She bounced her kids all around the friggin country trying to land a man and I guess get educated somewhere along the way.

Somebody needs to tell Obama's momma that it just ain't cool or respectful to be on a welfare program and have multiple kids with multiple daddies. She might lose the respect of some complete meaningless strangers. What the hell kind of example was she setting for her kids? Why didn't she give more forethought to the her husbands and/or sperm donors to have a more lasting relationship? Boy I can't wait to see how her kids grow up and turn out.


Oh now NappyKat, you know they will say he is the exception, not the rule.... (said with extreme sarcasm)....don't you know that children without fathers or children with moms who are like the one you describe can't possibly be high achievers and if they do it is a complete and utter fluke? (yup, more sarcasm) I mean after all, us women who have "**stard" children or even worse, "**stard" children by multiple fathers are the scorge of the earth and responsible for everything bad in society.....didn't you get the memo? I can send you a copy if you didn't get it. (wow, I'm so sarcastic at the moment....sawry).

As I have said over and over and over again......(should cut and paste so I don't have to keep typing it and finding the links to support it).....

If a child grows up with a loving, decent parent(s) .... (oh hell you all can fill in the blanks, I'm tired of typing it).

There are many freaks of society who grew up with two parents and their siblings all had the same parents.....(I'm sure some of them of these here boards had two parents and shared the same parents with their siblings and quite honestly.....oh never mind)

Threads like this are extremely judgemental and very condescending to read...they make me sick!

There are never any guarantees with our children...the best we can do is provide them with a loving home and opportunities to grow and develop into confident, law abiding adults.
 RLFish
Joined: 8/21/2009
Msg: 158
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 11/18/2009 3:19:02 PM
^^agreed!!


HALLELUJAH! PRAISE THE LORD!!


Well, I wouldn't go that far...it's MY opinion...let's leave Jesus out of it....LOL
 chrissyj88
Joined: 9/22/2009
Msg: 159
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 11/18/2009 3:28:33 PM
To krisinatlanta:

I CAN complain when we are trying to change the situation in a court system that is biased. This is my uncle's first and only son. And she did have kids with multiple men when we all met her but it didnt seem right to judge her on that aspect because she seemed like such a likeable woman. He is suing her for sole custody as we speak but its a long and drawn out process, over a year now actually. Since she is his temporary gaurdian until an agreement is reached through the courts, my uncle has to pay her hundreds of dollars a month in child support. Child support is a need, but not for swimming pools and trampolines. He is missing school, doctors appointments and dentist visits. Isnt that the whole point of the payments-to afford and ensure his health and well-being? The system is a problem, because the woman is always favored in custody disputes. Which is why so many crackhead alcoholic women are allowed to keep their babies. The CPS that I've seen is a joke-taking action only after the damage is done.
 daydreamin_honey
Joined: 12/30/2008
Msg: 160
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 11/18/2009 8:08:32 PM

My thoughts weren't with the ones who had long term relationships, mostly meant in regards to ones such as in this girls situation, each child is maybe a year apart, she is with the guy for a few months, gets pregnant, kicks him out, as she is got other guys on the go to, then has the baby, and starts the cycle all over again.


Hun, let me tell you from personal experience that it doesn't seem to matter to outsiders whether you were with the daddy for a night or a decade. You have two kids by two different men and you are automatically looked down upon. My son's dad and I were together for over 6yrs and only able to have my son. We split amicably. My ex and I were together for 3yrs and had our daughter. He had a daughter from his previous marriage as well my son's age. As long as we were together, the blended family thing was ok. But now that we aren't together anymore... i'm just one of "those girls" with multiple baby daddies.
My kids understand it, my family understands it, but I am so tired of the looks I get at my son's school or the doctor's office! If they were a year apart it wouldn't make the looks any worse to be honest.

As to your question, as someone already stated the answer. To most men, it's just a surefire piece of @$$. A good guy friend of mine admitted to me that guys see single mom's as easy lays because "they obviously put out if they have a kid". Blunt, but honest.
 lets fish!
Joined: 11/21/2009
Msg: 161
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 12/1/2009 1:49:33 AM
I work with single parents in Australia - our own welfare system.
Im not sure how the USA's welfare system differs much to ours but it sounds similar.

I have to say the MAJORITY of single parents here (on parenting payment) are more often than not inclined to have 1 - 3 kids and are divorced. 1 dad.

We have a lot of stories where a woman with 1 child meets, marries and has another child down the track.
I personally dont see the problem with this provided the eldest child is completely at ease and comfortable.
95% of the time this is the case and this is only the parents receiving welfare (when you consider all the single parents with blended families NOT on welfare, this leaves a very small percentage of whom is being discussed.)

A very small amount of recipients are so called baby factories and in EVERY case, there is a horrific background of abuse.

Then of course we have drugs, alcohol, and prison issues.

It seems to me that its very a much symptomatic behavior pattern and these people seem to be just clinging on to someone to love them.

Harsh reality. You wouldnt want to live like this so dont judge where you have never been.

One last point, where are the single FATHERS taking on full time responsibility with multiple children to different mothers?
Im not talking 2 relationships, Im talking the 7 or 8 thats being discussed (well, shredded actually).

If this has been brought up already I apologize as I got to page 4 and had to post
 trent205
Joined: 5/22/2008
Msg: 162
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 12/1/2009 6:46:53 AM
this I find really unattractive and woulf personaly never get involved with someone n that situation!

To me it just shows uneducation, and failure to learn from one's previous mistakes!
 itsallinthesoul
Joined: 6/26/2009
Msg: 163
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 12/1/2009 7:14:29 AM
A very small amount of recipients are so called baby factories and in EVERY case, there is a horrific background of abuse.

Then of course we have drugs, alcohol, and prison issues.

It seems to me that its very a much symptomatic behavior pattern and these people seem to be just clinging on to someone to love them.

Harsh reality. You wouldnt want to live like this so dont judge where you have never been.

One last point, where are the single FATHERS taking on full time responsibility with multiple children to different mothers?
Im not talking 2 relationships, Im talking the 7 or 8 thats being discussed (well, shredded actually).


Thank you !!!!!!!!!!

It is so easy to sit in judgement of some else's life. It is easier to throw stones at them than to give them a hand up.

As for the "fathers" of these children....they are usually perpetuating the cycle of abuse that these women have endured...........
 m__c
Joined: 5/26/2008
Msg: 164
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 12/1/2009 7:28:02 AM
Thank you !!!!!!!!!!

It is so easy to sit in judgement of some else's life. It is easier to throw stones at them than to give them a hand up.

As for the "fathers" of these children....they are usually perpetuating the cycle of abuse that these women have endured...........


Its quite interesting because i personally think that " this abuse thing is hiding the real issue's behind itself.Its a thing of past .The current issue is that they are having kids to make money" .

" A Child is a blessing when both of you want to but its a disaster when someone has it for the other"
 Tomau
Joined: 5/9/2009
Msg: 165
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 12/1/2009 7:37:35 AM

It is so easy to sit in judgement of some else's life. It is easier to throw stones at them than to give them a hand up.


how much of a handup? another 8 kids because they still didn't learn? You can only help those who want to be helped and continuing to pay their way to sit on welfare and continue that lifestle is NOT helping them, it is saying this is an ok lifestyle way to go keep it up.
 itsallinthesoul
Joined: 6/26/2009
Msg: 166
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 12/1/2009 8:08:45 AM
Matariki, you really need to learn to think outside the box.
 m__c
Joined: 5/26/2008
Msg: 167
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 12/1/2009 8:11:32 AM
Taken...I echo that.....hahahhah
 itsallinthesoul
Joined: 6/26/2009
Msg: 168
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 12/1/2009 8:36:39 AM
I can't speak for other places, but where I live, the government has taken steps to try and combat the "having more kids to make more money" thing. The actual numbers of people abusing the system in this way are small and certainly not representative of the majority of situations.

In reality, welfare reform still needs some work, on that I can agree with you. Still though, I do not see the benefit of treating a human being like anything less than a human being....on that we will never agree OP.
 Tomau
Joined: 5/9/2009
Msg: 169
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 12/1/2009 12:29:07 PM
haha V_C agrees with this thread to the point its ok to have many many children and live on welfare, but tells me I should be ashamed of myself because I once had to use welfare, and calls me an idiot and a liar in the child support thread while demeaning you all.

Sometimes I wonder if V_C is so angry because OMG he got some girl knocked up and may have to pay CS as it seems to be a VERY big issue for him.

Some people need to quit sitting on both sides of the fence.
 Whaaaat
Joined: 12/30/2007
Msg: 170
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 12/1/2009 3:21:01 PM

So is 6 the maic number here?

So 1 0r 2 or 3 kids with losers is all fine and dandy but 6 is the magic number where the woman is a lean mean baby making machine of a loser whore. Ok, got it.



Actually, I'd put it as 3 or 4, but that's just me. 6 implies that the woman is too stupid to know what birth control, or reality for that matter, actually is.
Just go get pregnant for every guy you date. Make sure it's within a year of the last birth, too. And make sure you don't know ANY of the guys except to be able to tell your friends what size his penis was.
Sorry, but 6 kids all by different guys? None of them involved, and the kids are all spaced so close, they could be freakin twins? Yeah, that makes mama a whore.
Just like it would make a guy who goes around knocking up every chic he can a loser skank.
 SweetnessInFlorida
Joined: 6/26/2008
Msg: 171
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 12/1/2009 7:05:26 PM
So if you were on welfare, how are these women so much worse than you?
While you are mocking them....they may just be mocking you....laughing about how your baby daddy preferred the pvssy of a crackhoe over your's, (doesnt say much about you), and how he was bagging all sorts of chicks and likely picking up diseases and passing them onto you while you were oh so faithfully breeding his kids and patting yourself on the back for having just one baby daddy. and he wasnt your husband i presume so he IS just a mere baby daddy, yes?
They might be laughing about you being kicked out of his home, for any smart woman would have had herself on the lease or deed, and for not havnng the wherewithal to have some independant savings so you werent homeless when he did kick you out of his home. And why would you mkuake yourself and your kids dependant on him? If you were on the lease or deed he could not have kicked you the house. Im a landlord, i purchase property and rent it out, and even i would have to give a 30 day notice and go through the courts and have the sheriffs serve an evcition notice for someone to leave, and one lessee absolutely can not kick another lessee out if they are both on the lease. Should have put your kids in a better position. perhaps you shoul;d have taken some time out from kissing your own ass and being a hater to either gaining your own independance, or at leats getting your own name on the damn lease so you couldnt be assed out looking like a fool when he decided his crackhoes crotch was nicer than yours and wanted you gone.
Yes im mean, i know, and go ahead and judge me too,one good turn deserves another, you certainly did your part in judging others, and i sho'nuff did my judging.

Request for pats on the back for having one baby daddy denied.
 Whaaaat
Joined: 12/30/2007
Msg: 172
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 12/2/2009 9:35:43 AM

So if you were on welfare, how are these women so much worse than you?


That is the most ignorant statement i have EVER seen. Welfare does NOT make someone worse than anyone. Loads of women I know had no choice, other than going and stripping or prostitution, than to go for Welfare. Doesn't make them ANY less than you or me. What does? Popping out child after child to stay on assistance. I would say the same for a woman who had 6 kids by the same dad, and chose to go on assistance and pop out kid after kid for the same loser.


While you are mocking them....they may just be mocking you....laughing about how your baby daddy preferred the pvssy of a crackhoe over your's, (doesnt say much about you), and how he was bagging all sorts of chicks and likely picking up diseases and passing them onto you while you were oh so faithfully breeding his kids and patting yourself on the back for having just one baby daddy. and he wasnt your husband i presume so he IS just a mere baby daddy, yes?


You presume an awful lot, but that doesn't surprise me :-)
He cheated on me once, yes. There were many extenuating circumstances (go look up the great big word)...it says nothing about me, seeing as he is now telling me how stupid he was, etc. He wasn't "banging all sorts of chics" and all tests came out clean. So there's that little theory blown down. And I had ONE kid from him. I wasn't the type to spread em and pop out a child for every man i dated...mere baby daddy? I was engaged to him, we were common law. No, not a mere baby daddy.


They might be laughing about you being kicked out of his home, for any smart woman would have had herself on the lease or deed, and for not havnng the wherewithal to have some independant savings so you werent homeless when he did kick you out of his home. And why would you mkuake yourself and your kids dependant on him? If you were on the lease or deed he could not have kicked you the house. Im a landlord, i purchase property and rent it out, and even i would have to give a 30 day notice and go through the courts and have the sheriffs serve an evcition notice for someone to leave, and one lessee absolutely can not kick another lessee out if they are both on the lease.


Now, I'm just starting to think that you aren't talking to me....cause none of this is even remotely my situation.


Should have put your kids in a better position. perhaps you shoul;d have taken some time out from kissing your own ass and being a hater to either gaining your own independance, or at leats getting your own name on the damn lease so you couldnt be assed out looking like a fool when he decided his crackhoes crotch was nicer than yours and wanted you gone.
Yes im mean, i know, and go ahead and judge me too,one good turn deserves another, you certainly did your part in judging others, and i sho'nuff did my judging.

Request for pats on the back for having one baby daddy denied.


My kids are in a fine position. My name is on the lease. And i don't use the word "hater". It's kind of a...juvenile term. Again, not surprising.

I'm not judging you. I don't KNOW you. But, you seem to be having a great time doing exactly what you're spouting off that I shouldn't be doing just that...

Oh yes, sooooo mean. *rolls eyes*...I've dealt with way worse than you, and with a smile on my face as I dismantled their little egotistical theory trips. Get over yourself.
 Tomau
Joined: 5/9/2009
Msg: 173
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 12/2/2009 9:54:01 AM

You presume an awful lot, but that doesn't surprise me :-)
He cheated on me once, yes. There were many extenuating circumstances (go look up the great big word)...it says nothing about me, seeing as he is now telling me how stupid he was, etc. He wasn't "banging all sorts of chics" and all tests came out clean. So there's that little theory blown down. And I had ONE kid from him. I wasn't the type to spread em and pop out a child for every man i dated...mere baby daddy? I was engaged to him, we were common law. No, not a mere baby daddy.


She was actually referring to me, so don't worry yourself. I am the one who brought up a topic that some feel it is wrong for anyone to be on welfare, except the woman who have baby number 8 with baby daddy number 8 none of the men around, babies close together as in mum got pregnant with the next scum bag that could get into her pants just so she could stay on welfare. (I was married to mine to for near 13 yrs)


Now, I'm just starting to think that you aren't talking to me....cause none of this is even remotely my situation.


Nope she isn't, once again me, because of how I feel about said women above that have babies and continue to do so solely for the purpose of playing the welfare system and didn't learn the first 2 or 3 times but instead bring baby no 8 into the world and continue to bum off everyone else around them, don't pay the rent, hydro, gas, nor buy food or necessities for these kids and expect her neighbors to feel bad for her and help her out. Her and current baby daddy would rather spend, the money on cocaine.... but Sweetness defends these women, seems to burn her butt about someone even making the comments I did. Yet Sweetness does not like others on Welfare and calls them all welfare mummys. She rides whatever side of the fence she feels at the time.

My ex would have had me stay, had I not said anything about his extra curricular activities.... Once I confronted him that was it. My name was on it, however, I was not going to stay and have my daughter put up with it and me being pregnant. Had I stayed and he left, bet you all would have said I was a money hungry **** out to take him for everything he had. Can't win for losing these days.

Some people do NEED TO READ all posts before assuming what is being said is about them when it is not and one can see it doesn't even apply to them, the above is a good example of such, since the poster there felt Sweetness was talking about her.
 Whaaaat
Joined: 12/30/2007
Msg: 174
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 12/2/2009 9:56:42 AM
I thought because it was between my posts, that she was.
People on here get their asses up way too easily. Seriously. It's the net.
 Tomau
Joined: 5/9/2009
Msg: 175
Multiple children by multiple partners
Posted: 12/2/2009 10:02:03 AM
I can say that they do. And many play both sides, not liking welfare mums but liking women that conitnue to have children with a ton of different men is a prime example of playing both sides. You don't like welfare mums, then why does she defend the welfare mum purposly doing nothing to even attempt to better herself except have yet baby no 8. I feel sorry for the kids, they have a mother that is too dumb to learn from her mistakes. Most would have figured out after at least baby 3 with daddy 3 this isn't working maybe I shouldn't be doing this

I checked the welfare rates here in BC, at least the disability ones, the basic allowance is 749 for a family of 3 after that it DOES NOT GO up. So shes not getting anymore money except through the baby bonus, so maybe it is time she got a brain and started to realize that she won't be getting more money after baby no 2. So the other 6 kids go without because of her stupidity. See even the government feels after 2 kids, one should have the brains enough to stop doing it.
Show ALL Forums  > Single Parents  > Multiple children by multiple partners