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 ThatsNOTmybaby
Joined: 10/27/2008
Msg: 48
Whats it like being single over 30?Page 2 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
U are very correct and I said that in a previous post about women in their 30's and 40's acting like '"hot in the crotch" teenagers and confusing that with being "self assured!" I KNOW if I wanted to find someone special, it will be HARD because alot of females have not really matured (though they are supposedly the 'mature sex") Then u add this COYOTE...i mean "cougar" nonsense and that make things even worse!! I see why men are complaining especially when it comes to finding a decent female these days!! I truly believe the really GOOD and GENUINE ones are taken or becoming even HARDER to find and what's left is the COYOTES (cougars), serial daters, whores and BITTER BETTY'S!!

U find a GENUINE, GOOD woman (not a reformed chick or a used to be WILD CHILD), cherish and appreciate her unless u want to deal with the leftovers from fcuked up relationships, casual flings and BABY DADDY DRAMA like it's NO end!! Till then...enjoy ur SINGLEhood and don't get caught up with mess and immature females!
 mcalgary
Joined: 11/10/2009
Msg: 50
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Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/14/2009 12:27:57 AM
I agree, it is really hard dating in our 30's. I have 2 kids and am really involved in their lives and I am finding that many woman either want a guy with no kids so they can start a family and not have any extra kids around (I can totally respect this but it sucks for me) or they want you to devote your time to them and make your kids second on the list. I have only been single though for about a year so I may have just not met the right one yet.
 CherylCake
Joined: 2/27/2007
Msg: 51
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/14/2009 9:09:34 AM
MCALGARY- enjoy your "extra kids" while you have em. You have the rest of your life to date, once they're gone. I'm 53, and have an active dating pool. I plan to have a pool till I croak. Unless some cream floats to the top, then I'll consider a committed relationship. And, girls, a man isn't wired for emotional support. That's what your girlfriends are for. Don't expect that from a man. They're good for other stuff...lol
 mcalgary
Joined: 11/10/2009
Msg: 53
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Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/14/2009 3:00:20 PM
Spumoni, I agree and that is my intention. My children will always come first but I am sure I can eventually find someone to share my time with that understands this fact. Maybe I will have to wait, who knows.
 CoolGuy1972
Joined: 7/23/2009
Msg: 54
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/14/2009 3:56:14 PM
I'm surprised. I stumbled across this site a few months ago. And then more recently I stumbled across the forums here. My surprise is how many threads there are about single people who are in their 30's and the implication that there is something wrong with it. I don't know if there is something wrong or right with it. I don't even know if it's a matter of right or wrong. For me, I'd rather be with someone than be single. But it's not been easy meeting someone. I think there are a lot of guys out there looking for just hook ups that kinda ruin it for the rest of us who are more serious about meeting someone. But besides all that, my biggest surprise is how many people on here, who all seem to have so much to offer, seem to just remain single. What is it that they are looking for that they aren't finding? Does it all boil down to just material possessions? I've read the posts and I see some beautiful women on here, who seem to have great lives and a lot going for them, but are still single. It just blows my mind that some of these women are still single. What is wrong with our society these days that so many beautiful people, who WANT to be in relationships, can't seem to make it happen? In our society, it seems like it's becoming more and more common for people to just stay single. Why is that? Is this just the natural order of things in this fast paced "me" world we live in now? I guess I'm just a little old fashioned so it's been tough trying to understand this -- but yet it is interesting how this situation even exists.
 You*N*Me
Joined: 7/24/2009
Msg: 55
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/15/2009 8:35:20 AM
Coming from a previous marriage, then a 2 yr long term relationship, I am still looking for the "one". For me it sucks, most women are taken and there are not many prospects as dating tends to be skewed in favor of women. Add to that I'm currently living in a small town. I get the odd date but for a 39 yr old male like myself, it's depressing to say the least.
 You*N*Me
Joined: 7/24/2009
Msg: 57
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/15/2009 10:38:01 AM
Thanks for the advice el metaleiro. And I do like Latinas very much.
 Climbing-well123
Joined: 9/22/2009
Msg: 59
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/15/2009 2:34:55 PM
Have to agree. Being single is great. I know many people who got married and did the kids and are not divorced and miserable.

I have freedom to travel when I Want. To do what I want. Go whenever I want to.

Best part of all. No Drama, no getting into those stupid situations like on shows like Big Brother. "oh that person said this to me"

How come people have to make a situation out of everything.

Then again its hard to find the right women. As too many have too high expectations and want u to be a slave. Or expect you to support 7 kids and be happy and supply everything.

As well never get into that situation where . Really its a big risk to get married. U get married and if things go wrong, being a guy u get your life ruined. AS the woman can legally take everything. Make you pay for everything and give all your money away.

So really getting into relationships is a huge risk.
 wings on my butt
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 62
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/19/2009 8:57:08 PM
What's it like being single over thirty? It's FANTASTIC!! I feel like I have been unchained from a heavy,clumsy,unmovable and painful rock for many years now. I am free free free! Life is sweet.
 CountIbli
Joined: 6/1/2005
Msg: 63
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/19/2009 11:47:22 PM
I find relationships stifling. Instead of doing things that I want to do we have to compromise and do things that "we" want to do. Any attempt at retaining personal freedom is taken to be a personal insult. Somehow I'm being mean if my life doesn't revolve around her. There's just too much BS, which the sex can't make up for.
 NotJustMrRightNow
Joined: 5/4/2009
Msg: 65
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/20/2009 2:39:01 PM
Single and over 30....
I am not particuarly found of being single. I am a relationship type of person. I am not the type to bounce from woman to woman, never have been. I am only single because my ten year relationship didn't go as planned. Is it hard to be single and over 30? My answer is yes. In my eyes I am too old to do the club/bar scene. Honestly I didn't enjoy that scene in my 20's. Being that I am self employed meeting a woman I work with doesn't work for me either. I think that is my biggest problem with being 30 and single, where do I meet the next "right one" for me.
 FluffyBrain
Joined: 3/11/2007
Msg: 68
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/21/2009 12:20:28 PM
It's all relative. I see a theme here. People 28-35 worried that they're getting too old and married life has passed them by and then the over 35's who have been married and now feel a real sense of freedom in being able to live life as they see fit. To the first group: committed or married relationships are not all they're cracked up to be, plus you'll be very surprised how your thinking pattern will change over the next 10 yrs (nothing to do with relationships either...you just start viewing things differently...what seemed so important almost seems silly, definitely seems insignificant, and you feel like you have a whole new wonderful knowledge & life...so just relax, nothing is passing you by...the best is yet to come). To the 2nd group, I'm right there with ya!! lol
 Mel1509
Joined: 11/15/2008
Msg: 71
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Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/21/2009 3:17:20 PM
I think men assume single women in their thirties are preoccupied with marriage and babies, whether they are or not. I find that even if we make no comment about these things the guys get scared that this is our agenda. Myself, yes I would like those things one day, but their not at the forefront of my mind 24/7. Secondly, many of the good ones are already taken and friends are settling down so it is more difficult. In your twenties you can go out and flirt with men and run away from them at the end of the night knowing there will be another one next week. In your thirties this isn't the case. Your pool of available men definately does dwindle and it's pretty scary. I like to think though that if your meant to be with someone you will find them.
 sideshowside
Joined: 11/29/2007
Msg: 72
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/21/2009 3:24:43 PM
I definately enjoy the freedom of being single and I am able to focus on myself...I guess being selfish. I do miss the company of women some nights but then I remind myself of the drama that comes with dating and the games also. I have no patience anymore when it comes to drama and games.
 Jeeep4Fun
Joined: 7/18/2009
Msg: 74
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/24/2009 7:24:21 AM

As long as you understand that in 5 years, you’ll still be here and looking, wondering what the hell is wrong. It’s been 8 years for me....


It's been 4 for me, and I'm not wondering what the hell is wrong. I know what is wrong. What's wrong is that I, like bronc, have high standards and am not willing to lower them or settle for less. I've learned the hard way (twice) that settling for less leads to disaster. Oh, in that case, it's not what's wrong...it's what's right!
 bsp71
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 77
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/25/2009 10:55:13 PM
No complaints- better to be happily single than in the wrong relationship. Of course we all would like to eventually find someone we are compatible with for a relationship of some type otherwise would not be on dating sites.
 Isamajik
Joined: 10/16/2009
Msg: 79
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 11/27/2009 12:18:19 AM
Coudnt agree with you more!!
 kpooks
Joined: 12/23/2008
Msg: 88
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Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 12/2/2009 8:51:29 PM
I'm missing out on getting laid...but, after listening to other people argue, I find the lack of discord rather blissful-!

So, it's a mixed-bag, a double-edged sword. There are pros and cons. Sometimes it's lonely, but sometimes it's quiet and quite pleasant!

If I can find someone with whom I enjoy a great deal of laughter, intellectual stimulation, warmth and fvcking with and just a wee bit of arguing, it'll be an improvement over being single. Gotta get to that point, of comfort IN craziness...
 GSwift77
Joined: 8/21/2009
Msg: 93
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Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 12/3/2009 6:06:36 AM
Looking back on my experiences, I've only had one bad relationship but I've had several good ones that ended nicely, and for benign (spelling?) reasons.

So, I'd have to say that I am happier when I have a good relationship. However, I took a two year break before I started looking again because it just felt nice to do my own thing and get my own life sorted out for a while.

Even a good relationship has its fair share of drama, but I think I could use a little more drama. From the movie "Parenthood": "Some people like the ferris wheel, but I like the rollercoaster".

The other side of my bed could be a little less empty too!
 dontstayhome
Joined: 10/9/2007
Msg: 94
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 12/6/2009 1:38:32 PM
The main difference is I work in an office with a bunch of guys all day so I'm not in contact with the opposite sex like my 20's. I do enjoy my freedom but also miss cuddling up on cold nights. I'm not in a rush and know the right one will be along soon.
 twirpy
Joined: 5/3/2008
Msg: 98
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Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 12/7/2009 7:17:16 PM
It's absolute hell for me, I'm lonely and sad most of the time. I work myself to the point of exhaustion, up to 70 hours a week or more so I don't have as much time to sit alone in my empty house. I'm very shy and it's difficult for me to go out at all anymore because the few friends I have are all married and seeing other couples together makes me feel so bad. I've never had a real relationship...just lots and lots of heartbreak over the years. I wish more than anything I had someone right now, it hurts being so lonely.
 jdkrup77
Joined: 11/8/2009
Msg: 102
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 12/10/2009 5:27:31 PM
You know a year ago I would say I was completely happy being by myself. Then I had a relationship that lasted the better part of this year. I honestly thought that I had found the one for me! Then she decided I was not the one for her though. Now in the past I used to be bitter if a woman dumped me. Now I look back and even though more then anything I wanted to spend my days with her, I told myself I should be thankful that she did not play me or string me along longer then she did. The advantage of being alone I have rediscovered is the freedom, you can do anything you want at any time and it is true I spend less money. I always enjoyed giving to her. The down side of course is the lack of company, I used to enjoy talking to her, having someone to let out some of the stuff of the day, without dumping too much. And lets be honest, having a steady partner in to sleep with is obviously something I miss!

I will say though from a male perspective, I would rather spend my days enjoying my solitude then with the wrong person. I have friends that got married for the wrong reasons, so they would not be alone. I am happy with who I am and I can live this way if I have too. Obviously I would prefer not too be alone, I would love to believe that what I experienced with her, that I could have for the remainder of my days. Lets just say I am happy enough to live my life by myself if needed, but I would sure love to have some along for the ride and bring them the same feelings they bring me.
 YoFabulous11
Joined: 7/14/2008
Msg: 104
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 12/11/2009 6:56:22 PM
It's a mixed bag. I love the freedom of being responsible for and accountable to only myself. I divorced at 31, so the rest of my 30's were an opportunity to make up for being married in my 20's. With no kids to care for, I had a blast. However, I just turned 41, and now I'd like to have the companionship and intimacy that comes with a relationship. I'm not desperate for marriage again (not saying I wouldn't do it again), but having a SO would be nice.
 visiblelaughter
Joined: 12/6/2009
Msg: 109
Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 12/13/2009 4:28:13 PM
I love being in my 30's awawell right now. Time is more important to me then ever before and i don't suffer fools like i used to. That also means i check myself when i start acting like a fool!
 helimech
Joined: 10/8/2004
Msg: 110
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Whats it like being single over 30?
Posted: 12/13/2009 5:07:07 PM
its great ,no regrets
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