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Joined: 10/31/2005
Msg: 41
Prison datingPage 2 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
Damn late for this thread too But, here goes. A woman I dated years ago was writing to a guy in prison while we were dating. I didn't know this at the time, found out from her brother when he told me the following true story: Guy gets out of prison, my ex marries him, she had a good job with the dept. of Agriculture. He needless to say didn't do shit, but smoke crack and sell every houshold item that had value, oh yes she had gotten her own home. She decides to divorce this guy and stays with her mother to avoid him. Guy breaks into mothers home, stabs her in the groin 23 times. She'll never be a mother. Guy gets 20yrs. To all who like to date "ex" cons. More power to ya! By the way she lost her job and travels around the state selling lingerie. Go figure!
Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 42
Prison dating
Posted: 2/11/2006 11:35:39 PM

You said we shouldn't "assume" because we know nothing, about you or you'r life..?

Well shouldn't that be IT aswell YOU should NOT "assume" somebody did
something so terrible wrong that can NOT be forgiveing because YOU truly
do NOT know, him or ANY of us who have known/dated somebody with
a bad past.

Alright so YOU would NOT date a guy who has an record of being an convicted fellon
or an ex convict that's YOUR right's nobody is telling you what you should be doing
with you'r life, or who YOU should be with.

I wish you wasn't so high pitch one somebody's past because WE all have a bad past and even some of us have a bad record lord's KNOWS were NOT all perfect or even P.E.R.F.E.C.T,
in any way.

By The Way i just LOVE the little (smiley)
Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 43
Prison dating
Posted: 2/11/2006 11:44:16 PM

Yes i KNOW it was an crimial offense O.K.A.Y (maybe spaceing the word's, will help YOU).

I'm NOT saying it was NOT a C.R.I.M.A.L offense NOBODY is ****ing perfect and i do NOT see where you or ANY body has the RIGHT'S, to judge ANY OF US or **** about me(or)my boyfriend or this girl and her boyfriend. I mean i'm SURE you ALL (we all) have done some shit in our past's that was wrong but NOBODY is ****ing at you or all of us about our past's.

YOU or NOBODY know's a damn thing about me or my boyfriend or OUR first child (on the way) so what gives you or them the right, to judge me or "us" (couple) about being with somebody who has a ****ed up past.

i for ONE..!


(wow it's funny because i bet everybody who, post's on here acturly think's the LITTLE word's, people use's on here so calls UPSETS me... thats funny )
Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 45
Prison dating
Posted: 2/12/2006 9:29:34 PM
That's nice to know and hear jess (if i may call, you "jess".)

I'm not saying my boyfriend is innocent he knew better to bring
the handgun along and i know it was because he had me, and
his unborn child in the car with us.

But he is "paying" for that now and he's been sitting in there
for almost 4 month's now and he's still not home because of
him, being an ex con and haveing an hand gun on him.

I'm not trying make it sound like i am takeing up for him or
trying sound like i'm saying he is an angel because god know's
none of us, are "angels" and he admitted it was stupid and wrong
of him to bring along the handgun while we left that night.

But he's doing his time and when he get's out i'm still going
to be around and still love him for who he is, not what he
has done in his past. (May i ask why were still, on this subject.?)

It's hard enough trying stay calm and not get upset over stuff
when people in half of my family does not, wan't to be around me
because i'm haveing a baby by somebody who is locked up right now.

Well you know what..... i CHOOSED to have this baby and
i choosed to have him in my life because before we ran into
some bad luck we was doing FINE we never fight/**** at one
another and at least i knew he NEVER cheated on me, or
slept around on me with some lady who was in her late 40's.

Like my ex boyfriend did while we lived togeather and slept in
the same bed he was NEVER at home during the night's and
half of the time, he wouldn't come home until 7am the next
morning. He would be out sleeping around with some other whore
and stay gone from around 6pm-7am sometime's little later than
Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 46
Prison dating
Posted: 2/19/2006 2:45:25 AM
Okay i have a question lol since i can not sleep tonight and its
going on 5am it's 4:42AM now but yeh anyway's back to my question,
what would you do/say if you was ALREADY with somebody and they
got arrested and they have serve their time in jail/prison wichever it
may be.?

Would you brake it off?
(being an jerk/cold hearted and haveing people, look at it as if why brake it off now when you have been with the person over 3year's?.)

What would you do if you (the guy) got arrested and have to serve sometime in jail/prison and you'r ole lady is pregnant and, you come home after being locked up to find that she's moved on and raising yall's child with another man?.

Just wondering what anybody would do IF,
any of US had to face that point in our live's.
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 47
Prison dating
Posted: 2/19/2006 1:39:45 PM
my dear jessika im behind u 100% if they choose to date someone like that more power they heading in the right direction why I knew a guy who got of prison and became a good person by force cause its the law u break it u serve that simple u choose to date one mmmmmmmmmm why not good luck why its only a mistake hell im bad when I want to be but u dont see me in prison. I know not to take what ever it is. why u think we have a law
Joined: 1/22/2006
Msg: 48
Prison dating
Posted: 2/19/2006 1:58:34 PM
JESSIKA I LOVE IT U GO GIRL THE TRAIN IS IN FULL FORCE U PLOWING THRU IT ALL. they can stand up to the truth hey im in prison on my pc and cam half the girls I see I cant touch mmmmmm that hurts
Joined: 4/24/2006
Msg: 52
Prison dating
Posted: 5/14/2006 4:14:43 PM
i dont understand how you meet somone while there in jail? how does that work?
Joined: 6/4/2005
Msg: 53
Prison dating
Posted: 5/15/2006 10:55:24 AM

I am wondering if anyone has dated or married someone in prison and if the relationship worked out after that person came home?

I think it might be a good idea if you're interested in bondage/S&M, since a former inmate should be used to handcuffs, deprivation, and the like.
Joined: 9/28/2004
Msg: 56
Prison dating
Posted: 5/16/2006 2:15:34 AM
I don't know what prison you are in. My son is in prison and there is NO internet access!
Joined: 9/28/2004
Msg: 57
Prison dating
Posted: 5/16/2006 2:26:58 AM
Yes Bunomatic! It would say alot about a girls character. It would say that they are NOT shallow and that EVERYONE deserves a break. Yes there are some hard criminals in prison and there are some like my son who are there because the girls daddy was good friends of the judge. My son left the state to start a new life and this GIRL violated the court order (to stay away from each other) and flew to vegas and begged him to come back. He did. Got caught and was sentenced to 8 years, followed by 10 years probation. She never got a thing for violating the court order. And for those who don't think a man has a chance when they get out, you are soooo wrong! Many get their law degrees...what about Judge Brown? My son was a stock broker when he went in and still has a great future when he gets out. Shallow people who think they are better than someone who has made a mistake REEEEEALY PISS ME OFF!!
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 58
Prison dating
Posted: 5/16/2006 11:26:33 AM
^^^^^The boyfriend doesn't need to "share" his paperwork with her, it's public record. If she wants to see it, all she has to do is pull it up on the web or visit her local courthouse.

And yes, there are times when life takes turns we do not expect. I work in the legal community (have for over 18 years) and like it or not, not all criminals are in jail, nor are all in jail criminals. No one needs to bash me for that statement, I know I know....all government figures (police officers, etc.) are honest, do their job, etc., etc. (yeah right!!) The simple fact is, sometimes you may love someone who makes bad choices for him/herself. That is life. And yes, there is someone in my life who is incarcerated. He is probably the most honest person I've ever known, that is why he's incarcerated ~ he admitted his mistake. Now, he's paying for it. He lost me, his freedom and a portion of himself. I stay in contact with him, out of respect. He taught me the true meaning of love. For you doubters out there ~~~ be very careful what you say. Things happen in life that you would never anticipate. Unless you've been in my shoes or anyone else's shoes in this position you can not say with certainty what you would or would not do. I learned that lesson the hardest way imaginable. I was once very judgmental, like many here ~~ not now. ~ Without knowing him, I wouldn't know love ~ how lucky I am that he entered my life.
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 60
Prison dating
Posted: 5/16/2006 11:46:40 AM
^^^Should either of you need to vent from time to time, feel free to email me. There are definitely times when one needs to talk to someone who isn't going to point out all of the hateful/negative aspects of our choices!! I have some great online support links, for those of us ~~ out here ~~ so to speak! Good luck to you both.
 The Black Knight
Joined: 1/13/2005
Msg: 61
Prison dating
Posted: 5/16/2006 11:54:38 AM
I will speak from the many things I see from working in a prison for several years from an officer, to a counselor to a manager. Yes there are those who made mistakes in life and are truly reformed. But there are many who are not and prey on outsiders through whatever con game they can use....they are very good at it. The biggest aim is either for money or contraband. And contraband may be things you would never suspect as wrong to give them. Bottom line is you can't give them anything other than what is in the vending machine because it is against the rules. The next big reason is because they need to establish a residence for Parole. As long as they are on parole they will play the love game. The best homework you can do is find out if their story matches up with public record. Many things are available through the court house. Second is getting a Rap Sheet to see just how busy they were before getting locked up. A recidivist offender is a sure red flag. Also drug offenders can be real nice inmates. As long as the drugs aren't in their system. I think also they truly want to change but most lose sight once out and their games start.

Bottom line is I am not saying to throw them to the curb. They are human and we all make mistakes. just do your homework and know it is ok to make a mistake but not to repeat over and over that same mistake.
Joined: 5/13/2006
Msg: 62
Prison dating
Posted: 5/16/2006 3:02:04 PM
First off I want everyone that reads this to know that I am not passing judgment on this jessika2980. I have no hate, or ill will towards her or her or her parents profession and I wish her nothing and her family nothing but the best now and in the future. But I just want to share a different point of view on things about her and her family being apart of the legal system. I read through everything written on this forum about "Prison Dating" And out of everyone who spoke on this matter this user jessika2980 was totally hilarious in the way she presents herself and with her thinking. BTW she would NOT make a very good lawyer. Most of the time she was just making comments that you don’t even have to be a licensed legal professional to even know yourself what she is talking about is against the law. BLAH BLAH BLAH… Have you noticed how she talks about what is morally and or legally right and wrong and what she would not do because its not morally or legally right, but wrong? like all that "talk" in someway makes her a better person or that she even for an instant even believes and or lives the life in which she speaks about. Almost every time she spoke on this forum she speaks in a way that because she has parents that worked and even retired from our legal system and that she too has worked in our legal system that in some way that makes her and or her parents better people than others. That is totally false. MOST of the time dealing with the kinds of people that are corrupt in the legal system that is one of the FIRST signs to watch out for as a professional to spot them for who they truly are as corrupt and completely unjust and or plain and simple no good. Let me tell you the other side of the REAL truth and learn something Jessika backing it with FACT because that 2980 could be just your own prison number that you and or one of your parents deserve yourself ... Some of the worst people you will ever find in the entire world that have gotten away scott free over and over endlessly with corruption, drug dealing and use, assault, mental and physical abuse, rape, murder and so on are people IN our justice system even NOW and or that have retired. That includes possibly you and or your own parents jessika. I have seen even those working in our justice system currently, and or retired if not cover up crimes of there own help a friend and or family member cover up a major crime they would have went to prison over MANY times. And let me tell you don’t think the US government WILL NOT KILL YOU if they think you’re a threat to blow the whistle on someone doing things illegally but its suppose to be TOP SECRET off the record that’s only for the better of America and the American people. I would rather you save your BS on how just because you work and or have worked in our justice system that you are in someway BETTER or completely innocent cause I can assure you with FACT that your far from innocent and or perfect little lady. That includes you and or your parents. Being in the profession I am in I have seen this shit FIRST HAND PERSONALLY over and over with all types and kinds of local, state, and national law enforcement officials and agencies and government officials and agencies and its sad that there are even actual contracts that keep those that work in the legal system on local and state and national levels from ever being convicted of breaking the law themselves even for MAJOR crimes such as MURDER. Another fact is even if you can't cover a crime up, if you know the right people and or can afford a good lawyer its already been proven over and over that even if your caught RED HANDED for the crime you can pay your way out of trouble rape murder ect ect.... So please little girl save your statements for your parents to make them happy. After all I bet they even helped you get a conviction for that dude you say raped you. And maybe he did and if so then he got what he deserved… But then again if say he didn’t really rape you, it still made it allot easier for that person to be convicted with your parents and you already apart of the legal system didn’t it? Even if he was completely innocent, but you just wanted to **** up that mans life up because you were pissed off maybe because he just left you and wanted nothing to do with you and or he just cheated on you and that made you so angry you decided to claim rape and say to yourself that he will pay. Maybe you were virgin and it would have killed mommy and daddy that you had sex out of wedlock so claiming rape would have covered your ass in that situation as well and or heres another maybe just maybe you were and or are a married woman that was out cheating around on your husband behind his back there was a chance you were gonna get caught and or did get caught and in order to make sure it was covered up and make you look completely innocent you claimed this man you were willingly having sex with raped you. After all you will always me mommy and daddy’s little girl that can do no wrong. Even if something happened to where you went out and killed someone yourself in cold blood over something, I bet even if your parents knew right up front that you DID it that you was guilty they would STILL try to prove your innocence as much as they could because your there little girl. They would probably work there asses off day and night if not to get you off scott free, or lesson the charges so you would not do any prison or county jail time or just so you could spend sometime in a mental hospital and be out and that’s only IF they couldn’t in some way get the crime you committed completely covered up first. Gos back to what I have always said that is also FACT. Just because America has the greatest working system to date in the world, doesn’t mean that it is NOT a system with major flaws. That will never change because the people who are in control of our legal system no matter on what level the contribute there service they are not flawless people.

Including jessika and her parents.
Joined: 3/13/2006
Msg: 63
Prison dating
Posted: 5/18/2006 9:19:36 PM
"only bad if they killed someone"

I strongly disagree.In my opinion, a rape is a greater crime than murder.When you kill a person, atleast the person dies and is free.But when you rape a woman, she loses everything and has to live with that horrible act committed against her for the rest of her life.I am not a forgiving-forgetting type of a person.However, if I had to forgive either a murderer or a rapist, I'd forgive the murderer.Because when you rape a woman, you kill her everyday and that is the greatest crime in my opinion.
Joined: 2/25/2006
Msg: 64
Prison dating
Posted: 5/19/2006 9:10:58 AM

unless you really wanna.
Joined: 2/25/2006
Msg: 65
Prison dating
Posted: 5/19/2006 9:12:46 AM
I totally agree. Prison doest NOT rehabilitate anybody. Institutionalizes them if anything. When people change out of their ways, I think its purely out of their own mental strength. Which happens rarely, have you seen Dog the Bounty Hunter? cheesy reference, but you see my point lol.
Joined: 5/6/2006
Msg: 66
Prison dating ? to it
Posted: 5/20/2006 9:15:20 AM
if a woman be in prison it depends on what she has done to get there just because there doing time dont mean thay should be total condemond but there are problem 1 if thay were on drugs like meth and it is mental and sexuall adictive and only about 6% quit after thay get back out on the streets one reason is thay go back to the same people in the same kind of inviourment thay really dont have much of a chance and most people wouldnot want much to do withthem after thay get out of prision because of porole comlication and probashion officer problems and there past connections this is alot of extra baggage toi carry around
i get write to the point now some people end up in jail for other reaso n but most people that mitedate a womaN OR MAN FROM PRISON THAT IS SERVING TIME WOULD WANT TO KNOW WHAT THAY HAD COMMITED YOU HAVE TO LOOK AT IT FROM A INTELIGENT POINT OF VIEW
Joined: 12/14/2005
Msg: 67
Prison dating
Posted: 6/27/2006 12:51:02 AM
There are a lot of really uniformed people here but I can understand if you get your info on TV or in the newspaper.

Currently the US has a higher percentage of it's popluation locked up than any county ever has in history. We have a higher percentage locked up than Communist China, the Soviets or even Nazi Germany ever did. We have become a police state where everything is criminalized. Land of the free? My arse!

You think a felony is such a bad thing? Well someone that owned gold during the 50's when it was illegal to own could be a felon, talking to someone about a question on the FL construction exams could make you a felon, or walking down the street with your chid and using a port-a-john on a construction site could also make you a felon in FL. Whole books can be written about this twisting and hysteria centering around this word.

The pittsburgh post-gazette did one of the best investigative reports on Prosecutorial Misconduct I have ever read I highly reccomend it.

Take a moment and read this Ayn Rand quote that surmises what is going on:

"Did you really think that we want those laws to be observed?" said
Dr. Ferris. "We WANT them broken. You'd better get it straight that
it's not a bunch of boy scouts you're up against - then you'll know
that this is not the age of beautiful gestures. We're after power and
we mean it. You fellows were pikers, but we know the real trick, and
you'd better get wise to it. There's no way to rule innocent men. The
only power any government has is the power to crack down on criminals.
Well, when there aren't enough criminals, one MAKES them. One
declares so many things to be a crime that it becomes impossible for
men to live without breaking laws. Who wants a nation of law-abiding
What's there in that for anyone? But just pass the kind of laws that
can neither be observed nor enforced nor objectively interpreted - and
you create a nation of law-breakers - and then you cash in on guilt.
Now that's the system, Mr. Rearden, that's the game, and once you
understand it, you'll be much easier to deal with."

(Page 406 of Atlas Shrugged, Ayn Rand).
Joined: 3/16/2005
Msg: 68
Prison dating
Posted: 2/15/2007 9:24:44 AM
Wow! I didn't know that my question with get this many responses! Thanks everyone for the comments, whether negative or positive. UPDATE:First of all, I knew my husband for about 5 years before he went in. I married him 5 years before he came home. He served 15 years in prison for a crime he didn't commit. I know this for a fact because I was at the scene of the crime. He got charged for helping to beat a guy into a coma. He didn't even touch the guy, actually he saved his life because he tried to stop the guys that were beating him to stop. One guy actually told the judge in court that my husband was not involved! Well he received 25 years for this! He is now home and has been now for nearly 2 years. He is doing great! He works 10-12 hours a day and saved his money and got his license and bought a car within the first 6 months of being released. He takes care of all our needs financially and I just work part time. We are currently working on buying a home. He has even adopted my adopted son! Everyone I know told us it wouldn't work and I should just leave him alone. I couldn't give up on him because he is my best friend as well as my first love. I am living proof that there can be sunshine after the rain. For those that have penpals in prison, I think that is awesome! Everyone could use a friend. There are some inmates out to get money, but all of them are not the same. Some just are lonely and wants someone to write to. If you feel that they are out for money, find another penpal. There are thousand out there. There is also a website called "prisontalk" for those needing support! They also have penpals on there you can write to, for those that had a question about it. It was started by a guy that was in federal prison. I used to have the same negative thoughts and comments about people in prison before I met my husband. I will update our situation again in about 6 months. Thanks everyone again and God Bless!
Joined: 3/16/2005
Msg: 69
Prison dating
Posted: 2/15/2007 9:39:22 AM
Thanks Brook. Right now I am home with the flu. I knew it would catch up with me sooner or later.
Joined: 3/16/2005
Msg: 70
Prison dating
Posted: 2/15/2007 6:16:19 PM
You are totally correct drg. Ex felons are everywhere.
Joined: 7/18/2006
Msg: 71
Prison dating
Posted: 2/15/2007 6:26:06 PM
LOL! Why do it? Why do you even consider it I wonder.
 Frau Blücher
Joined: 8/27/2006
Msg: 75
Prison dating
Posted: 3/2/2007 8:54:14 AM
Isn't "prison dating" an oxymoron? How can you really get to know someone when there's a sheet of Plexiglas between you? No, prison dating is one green mile that I shall never trod.

Uh uh
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