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Show ALL Forums  > Off Topic  > paying my way..and the partner?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Miss W
Joined: 12/4/2006
Msg: 21
paying my way..and the partner?Page 3 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Who are these people? He didn't feel embarrassed or uncomfortable not even paying his share of the FOOD?

I agree, but there are a lot of people who feel a sense of entitlement and then there are those who enable them.

So, I say, maybe you jumped into this too soon.

You think? One can be well educated but lack common sense.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 22
paying my way..and the partner?
Posted: 12/9/2009 1:07:04 PM
I didn't misunderstand either. What I did think after reading your initial post was......... a man with this opinion of women, wouldn't be someone I'd want to meet.

Me either!

Most people are mature enough to know that there's no such thing as a "free ride", in this world. (Excuse the pun). We also know that, those of us who are generous, and sometimes to a fault, can be duped by people who make it a lifetime hobby of "hitching onto other people's coat tails. Unfortunately, you met a coat-rider.

freatlt: Did you notice that I didn't single out either gender? I didn't refer to or disparage people, who enjoy particular activities, in my post either.

Exactly.
My initial reaction is, how in the heck did he( the OPs 'star boarder') stand HIMSELF, living off somebody else like that? I hope his weiner was bigger than his sense of doing the right thing...
I can't even IMAGINE living with somebody and not contributing. Even if it was a short term "houseguest" , I'd insist on either contributing or I'd insist on being allowed to provide some "extras". The only situation I could see where one responsible adult human being might not be able to contribute would be if they had lost everything due to fire, flood,natural disaster or other genuine human emergency.

It's the mindset displayed here by some male posters who think they know everything that's in the hearts, minds and lives of mature unmarried women,that makes me shake my head and be glad that I'm fine with living solo, and that by and large, all I want in terms of romance is a respectful committed LTR where we each live in our own houses and pay our own bills and avoid co mingling finances, blending families or passing judgement on one another's possessions and hobbies.
Cindy O
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 23
paying my way..and the partner?
Posted: 12/10/2009 10:33:19 AM
Few years ago, I got involved with and fell in love with and moved in with a fella who lived in NYC. I kept my place here (no payments, it's paid for, but taxes); also kept my vehicle registered here, and got insurance from here. We discussed nothing, lol!, until a friend of mine freaked about that fact. So we had a five minute discussion, which went something like this: Well, your living here costs me nothing in terms of rent or utilities (which are included); it would be nice if you could help with the food, can you do that? Yep. When we eat at home, I'm your guest; when we go out, you're my date, and I'll continue to pay. I kept house, saving him the maid's fee, cooked, cleaned, did his (our) laundry, and bought 98% of the food. Excepted in the food budget was butter (couldn't bring myself to pay $17/lb for imported Irish butter. . . ), his "blue algae drinks, and any steaks/roasts over $5/lb. . . . For a steak and potato dinner, I bought and cooked the taters, he bought and cooked the steak. We did perfectly fine until he died, and I came back here. Still miss him.

My view? If we picked our mate right, there is unlikely to be any problem, no matter how it's worked out. If not, there's gonna be. Big time.



ps ~~ funny thing, *all* the traveling women I know, and we are many, travel on our own dime. Only time I traveled with a fella, I paid for him (bringing new hubby home from China). Don't know where freeteat is finding these chicks, lol! But my view is if one invites another, then it's like a date: the invitor pays, the invitee is a good companion.
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