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 bpjb01
Joined: 8/3/2009
Msg: 1
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overseas dating..?Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)
The question would be does it matter where a persons from if they feel an attraction? My opinion is that if the chemistry is right why would distance matter ,obviously someone will have to move but thats the whole idea of starting new life and relationship. My belief is that if your still looking obviously what you have been doing is not working. Myself included. Interesting to hear others opinions.
 ForRumOnly
Joined: 3/16/2009
Msg: 2
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overseas dating..?
Posted: 12/30/2009 1:50:51 PM
I dated someone from 8000 miles away. We came soooo close to making it work, too! However, in the end, issues with timing and immigration were severe obstacles we just couldn't overcome.

It's very difficult carrying on a long distance relationship, and the obstacles to getting together even in the best of circumstances are not trivial. You have to be very sure that it's worth pursuing - but it CAN be very worthwhile. Even if it doesn't ultimately work out, as in my case, I have NO regrets about trying!

Ideal matches are few and far between, and I think some people settle because someone nearby is convenient and presumably good enough. Sometimes they actually are, too! I finally met another ideal match only 100 miles away, and even then it took some doing to make it work. However, it has been the best decision I've ever made.
 colt8301
Joined: 10/25/2006
Msg: 3
overseas dating..?
Posted: 12/30/2009 1:56:57 PM
It shouldn't but just packing up and going on a hunch of something great, that's a big step. But if a person truly wants that other person I would have to say that risk will be worth it. Sometimes following what you are passionate about is way more important than "stability".
 carolann0308
Joined: 12/9/2006
Msg: 4
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overseas dating..?
Posted: 12/30/2009 2:01:43 PM
When you have a flexible job and have no children you can go wherever you like. When you need to work and have family ties more than a few miles away can be a complete waste of time.
 Karaokebear
Joined: 4/20/2008
Msg: 5
overseas dating..?
Posted: 12/30/2009 4:33:11 PM
Just remember, if you're thinking you're going to do the modern day mail order bride thing and bring someone over who doesn't speak English and has no ability to leave you...guess what, she'll learn English and if she wants to leave, she will.
 911mom
Joined: 12/11/2006
Msg: 6
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overseas dating..?
Posted: 12/30/2009 6:39:34 PM
I dont think it matters where a person lives. I agree if the chemistry is there if both parties are willing it can work.
 farscapeprincess
Joined: 4/28/2008
Msg: 7
overseas dating..?
Posted: 1/13/2010 2:56:20 PM
I think it would be a challenge. If one is rich and can travel on a whim, I think it is do-able. But how many of us here on a free dating site have that kind of money to travel abroad frequently in order to nurture a relationship? I have an adventurous nature, but I also know that it would be a challenge to maintain and I'm not in a position to go anywhere right now. Even moving 200 mi. would be out of the question.
 Red Fish GF
Joined: 12/3/2009
Msg: 8
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overseas dating..?
Posted: 1/15/2010 10:40:58 AM
When I was going through my divorce I started chatting with a man from overseas I met on Yahoo answers which is similar to this forum except it's not also a dating site. He was there for me when I needed to vent and after months we developed feelings for each other. He was planning to move to the USA to be with me but I said we need to spend some time in person first before something like that would happen. An old friend came into the picture who was having marriage problems and they started an emotional affair. I finally said he had to choose and along with the fact he had to get a Visa and everything to come over here he chose her out of convenience. I was upset and hurt but decided to continue being friends although I thought what he was doing was wrong. Sometimes he would email me and say he made the wrong choice because she wouldn't leave her husband. Long story short, he is in another bad relationship now with a woman he met online around the same time as me who moved from Poland to England for him and is emotionally distant. He realizes he could never move to the USA, his kids and family are all over there. I knew it was impossible for me to move over there, I can't move more than 100 miles from my kids dad. It's hard to say if we would of felt the same way in person but he is still a friend to me but we don't email everyday like we used to.


I've seen some of these long distance relationships work though. My cousin's wife moved from another country to the USA to marry him after he visited her where she is from. They are still together years later and have a daughter.
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 9
overseas dating..?
Posted: 1/25/2010 11:56:25 AM

Personally i have dated a few in Europe. The last one i was talking to was a Russian beauty in Saratov and i adored everything about her. Me and her clicked right off the bat and we wrote each other quite frequently. In fact i must have played my cards well because she wanted me to meet her in Saratov. The only drawback was that she wanted marriage then and now and i told her that i was not sure that i wanted commitment at the moment.

Needless to say i never heard from her again and this was about a month ago. I can honestly say i was more then just merely attracted to her and i screwed it up by getting kind of mad at the fact that she wanted marriage. It seems that european women are different then the ones here at least some and it seems that some of those over there are more appreciative of getting emails from us males. I tend to have more luck across the seas then i do here. Who knows why?


Wow...just wow. ahahahahahaha!
You do know that an actual relationship means you've met in person, have dated,
gotten to know each other and have decided to pursue a relationship. I can't believe
you don't know why this woman didn't want anything to do with you after you said
you wouldn't marry her. Surely you are not that naive?
OT
I guess it depends on the person. While I'd love to find my significant other, my
life, job and family are here. I really hope to find someone in my general area so
neither one of us would have to move. I can totally understand people who up and
move to be with the person they love, but I can't honestly see myself getting involved
with someone so far away.
 el lagarto
Joined: 4/29/2009
Msg: 10
overseas dating..?
Posted: 1/27/2010 8:09:12 AM
IF your job is portable , or you're retired and easily able to travel , AND there's no major commitments holding you in one place , AND you can afford the travel back and forth, AND you meet someone who really does it for ya - then hey , go for it !


I already changed my life a few years back , and did my relocating to where I am now- and it suits me well. I would much rather find someone who loves this area as well - so we can settle in and enjoy. I think it's quite difficult to grow a connection based on reality , unless you can have regular and sometimes spontaneous, day-to-day contact.
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