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Joined: 11/23/2009
Msg: 18
Rebound timeframe and relationship readyPage 2 of 2    (1, 2)
Actually all of the women I've been experencing this problem with I saw on several occasions. I've been doing the casual dating for the last 2 years and now I'm looking for something long term. The ones I saw long term dating potential with started out "appearing" to be over any exes, so I give things a go. Suddenly issues with the ex come up and things comes to a halt with us.

I only need to see how a movie ends once to know how it will end the next few times I watch it.
Joined: 11/6/2007
Msg: 19
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Rebound timeframe and relationship ready
Posted: 1/23/2010 11:08:44 PM
personally, i consider a rebound to be to go out with someone with the intent of getting your mind off an ex. rebounds can last a while and can go thru a number of flings - as long as that person is still missing/getting over/thinks about their ex while trying to date someone else. As for the time frame, for i think it'd be about 6 months to a year before someone can get over a serious relationship... though honestly, i think it depends more on the length of the previous relationship than anything else (ie. 5 year romance would take longer to get over than a 1 year romance).
Joined: 8/18/2011
Msg: 20
Rebound timeframe and relationship ready
Posted: 9/10/2011 5:32:24 PM
I seem to have all of my relationships based on the 'Rebound" In one way or another.
I was dumped just a month ago. I was doing things that totally justified the dumping, but at the same time my ex was creating a "relationship" with another guy right in front of me. She swears they never did anything with him.
She gets insecure about relationships and jumps around a lot. I was in a 6 year LTR before this one, (which was 3-1/2 years. )
The 6 year LTR was started while the woman was separated and was still not divorced for a year after we started our relationship. I met the last ex while she was still in a LTR with another guy. Just before we had sex she reveled she was "kinda, still" in a relationship! I had her call him and officially break it off.
Even now she tells me she misses me and loved me and I was the best, blah, blah, but wont end the relationship she is in now. She started it less then a week after she dumped me.
Seems like there is no actual end to the connection with some people. Even my ex has told me she still thinks of past lovers and pined for one ex even after he died!
I tend to get into long term things and prefer them over short term. But it seems the consequences of the break up is harder when the LTR is longer.
Joined: 9/5/2011
Msg: 21
Rebound timeframe and relationship ready
Posted: 9/10/2011 5:40:59 PM
When I am in the mood to get laid and don't want the hassle of any relationship, I go straight to a search for "separated." Any woman who is still married to her husband and finds herself hunting online for someone new is someone who wants laid even more than I do at that moment. Of course, my strategy is to pretend that "i want that special person I can't forget about when I leave to go home." I have found it easier to get separated women into bed than any other group. Just understand that "they just got out of a relationship" or worse "they are still doing their spouse while doing you." If you subscribe to the philosophy that sex is a bottomless well, then go for the married but transitioning (maybe) to a single girl. It's worked many times for me.
Joined: 9/1/2011
Msg: 22
Rebound timeframe and relationship ready
Posted: 9/20/2011 10:10:57 AM
When I am in the mood to get laid and don't want the hassle of any relationship, I go straight to a search for "separated

Well I'm sure that's all they want from you too so it works, bravo.

I waited 2 years after my divorce but I was married 20 years with him 24.
Joined: 8/18/2011
Msg: 23
Rebound timeframe and relationship ready
Posted: 9/20/2011 11:58:14 AM
Not everyone does the whole rebound thing. It also depends on why their relationship ended. If it was a mutual we just aren't ment for each other thing. Then a rebound isn't needed in my opinion.

If it's a she got dumped because she cheated on him or he found someone else and she still cares for him then yeah run and hide.

It also depends on the person. I know people who go in and out of serious relationships constantly. Dating them is extremely hard you have to be there almost the moment they become single. There is a week or two period in which you can get your foot in the door.

Others come out of relationship and go wild party and so on. It really just depends on the person.

That said I think if the two of you are ment to be together it doesn't matter. If you two really click and she's put her ex in the past you're good.
Joined: 9/17/2011
Msg: 24
Rebound timeframe and relationship ready
Posted: 9/20/2011 7:38:30 PM
I really believe it depends on how long that relationship lasted and the depth of it as well. I think some people believe that they are "healed" until something comes up and old hurts or feelings come creeping up and they find that they're not. I think some people move on quickly because of a fear of being alone or they want to be taken care of or want to forget the ex. Again, I think it depends on the length and depth of the relationship. I attended a divorce recovery class after my breakup and it was interesting to see that many more men in the class wanted to move on to other relationships then the women.
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