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 bodypro8ra
Joined: 1/24/2011
Msg: 567
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??Page 15 of 30    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30)
You are also off topic in your reply. I'm also about 50/50 street/ring. But being in the ring is not childish nonsense. I had friends whose careers petered out that worked in bars: "My job is knocking out drunks." It was something sad for them. Because boxing is violence but violence is not boxing. You don't see what putting gloves on has to do with confidence? Okay. You are clearly proud of what you do and who you are. Nobody else? I seen you signifying all over these forums.

Now. How did this thread stray off course? If there is to be supposition about the significance of the number of a woman's lifetime sexual partners then obviously someone will and did bring up; what about a man's numbers? Because that is a double standard. From there the subject becomes why are some (most) men proud of their notches and why women are supposed to be ashamed.

This is not rocket science. Now you got guys disingenuously claiming that they are not proud of their count (maybe they have a low count so they take the high road, or maybe they really are indifferent, or they pretend to be indifferent).

Regardless, now you got a guy like me using sarcasm to make a point and then you got guys who either don't get it or choose not to in order to make their own presentation, whatever the hell it is.

Why does it matter? It really doesn't matter to me, notwithstanding that I pushed some buttons with my sarcasm. But body count is the topic of discussion. For you the numbers don't matter, for others they do. Otherwise the thread could be locked as soon as you weighed in.

Get it yet? Why the thread seems off course? It really isn't though. The real issue is one man's sexual insecurity around a specific woman and conversely other posters insecurities and experiences. Maybe the thread will get cleaned up or not.
 kayla1963
Joined: 4/1/2011
Msg: 568
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/4/2011 3:34:33 PM
Unless you are her pimp and she is holding back, what makes it your biz?
 Dan99993
Joined: 11/29/2010
Msg: 570
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/6/2011 12:03:53 PM
In today's world (I'm not implying there's something wrong with today's world) anybody who's shocked that his girlfriend in her 20s has had 10 or more sexual partners is a bit not-ready for sex..

Even if she'd had 50 (you can date a lot and end up sleeping with a lot of people).

The numbers don't necessarily mean much.
 Wyatt Earp1
Joined: 7/15/2009
Msg: 571
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/6/2011 10:35:39 PM
1) -Imho the OP is describing a normal healthy woman.
_______________________________________________________
2)
Men are afraid. What are they afraid of? That they won't measure up. That they won't prove as men. That's from ancient days when we hunted in packs. That's the burden of being a man that women don't have. We got to prove it. Women have the pain and burden of child birth.



I earned it. I can be gentle. I proved myself. I don't have to be "on" all the time. I'm not "checking" myself all the time. It's liberating.


bodypro8ra-excellent natural direct writing style. You brought up very good points.
 Arlo_Troutman
Joined: 9/26/2009
Msg: 572
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/7/2011 3:56:45 PM

(verygreeneyez) ED isn't something you manifest due to boredom in the bedroom. It's a medical condition.


Wrong. ED can have a variety 0f causes. Sometimes it's purely physical; sometimes it's purely psycholgical; and, sometimes, it's varying degrees of both. Or, even other factors I neglected to mention...

Sheesh @ all these "It's all one thing, and NOTHING ELSE!!!" people...

Arlo...
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 573
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/7/2011 5:01:54 PM
^^^Sheesh, and all of you that don't research. Of course it's medical. I didn't list causes, I listed effect. Makes no difference WHAT causes it ~ it's medical in nature. Let me help with this for you:

Erectile dysfunction (impotence) is the inability to get and keep an erection firm enough for sex. Having erection trouble from time to time isn't necessarily a cause for concern. But if erectile dysfunction is an ongoing problem, it may cause stress, cause relationship problems or affect your self-confidence.

Even though it may seem awkward to talk with your doctor about erectile dysfunction, go in for an evaluation. Problems getting or keeping an erection can be a sign of a health condition that needs treatment, such as heart disease or poorly controlled diabetes. Treating an underlying problem may be enough to reverse your erectile dysfunction.

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/erectile-dysfunction/DS00162
It's much more likely to be caused by physical ailments than emotional or psychology, but those things can cause or worsen ED. It's still considered a medical problem, regardless of what the cause is:

Physical causes of erectile dysfunction
In most cases, erectile dysfunction is caused by something physical. Common causes include:

* Heart disease
* Clogged blood vessels (atherosclerosis)
* High blood pressure
* Diabetes
* Obesity
* Metabolic syndrome, a condition involving increased blood pressure, high insulin levels, body fat around the waist and high cholesterol
* Parkinson's disease
* Multiple sclerosis
* Low testosterone
* Peyronie's disease, development of scar tissue inside the penis
* Certain prescription medications
* Tobacco use
* Alcoholism and other forms of substance abuse
* Treatments for prostate cancer or enlarged prostate
* Surgeries or injuries that affect the pelvic area or spinal cord

Psychological causes of erectile dysfunction
The brain plays a key role in triggering the series of physical events that cause an erection, starting with feelings of sexual excitement. A number of things can interfere with sexual feelings and cause or worsen erectile dysfunction. These include:

* Depression, anxiety or other mental health conditions
* Stress
* Fatigue
* Relationship problems due to stress, poor communication or other concerns

Risk factors Symptoms

http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/erectile-dysfunction/DS00162/DSECTION=causes
I think the Mayo Clinic likely has their facts correct. JMO
 tmb519
Joined: 5/30/2010
Msg: 574
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HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/8/2011 3:59:45 PM
The numbers do have meaning. They are an indicator of risk: a metric of exposure to STIs. Perhaps the issue isn't with someone who is shocked at a high number, but the fact that today's world has a cavalier attitude towards sex. Those defending high numbers can only do so with the superficial argument that it's "no one's business," while those with low numbers seem more willing to disclose their number. What constitutes high or low is anyone's guess, though I think each person has their own definition that is largely shaped by society.
 tmb519
Joined: 5/30/2010
Msg: 576
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HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/8/2011 4:34:10 PM
Which part do you disagree with? I am not looking to get into judging people or determining the level that is considered too many partners or make it a battle of sexes. I simply take exception to the idea that one's number "is no one's business" since the moment you engage in potentially risky behavior that endangers the health of another person is the moment that one's number becomes at least one other person's business. I know the common rebuttal to that is as long as someone can prove they are clean then why does it matter, and to that one has to look no further than the '80s when I'm sure everyone was "clean" until that whole HIV and AIDS thing was discovered. The fact of the matter is, no one knows how much stuff is out there with regard to STIs as the research continues to reveal new things all the time.



Actually, I beg to differ...at least when it comes to females.

We males are built for infinity in a lot of things (attraction, status, mates, etc). If females think this is unfair, tough shit! Life is not about fair or unfair. That is just our nature. It has been that way since 65 million years ago (when our family, primates, came to be), it is still the same way now and it sure as hell ain't going to change in the next 40-50 million years. Our appendix, an organ used by our primatial ancestors to house bacteria strong enough to break down highly-carbonated plants (when plants were our family's primary source of nutrients) is still around despite serving next to no function (largely, because of the way our stomachs have evolved due to changing our diet to meat also).

With women, there is a measuring stick. It doesn't take a lot of ingenuity to figure it out: we homonoids gestate anywhere from 8-10 months. Add six to eight more weeks to that; that is the amount of time it takes for the vagina and uterus to go back to its default form. Plus, the amount of time it takes to recover from the psycholical trauma from pregnancy. You are looking at about 1 male per year.

If we are to use the US's legal age (and I am putting it nicely by disregarding anyone before 18), then we can judge when a female is promiscuous BY NATURE. If she is 29 and has had more than 10 men, she is promiscouos.

The average 25 year old American female today has had 30-40 partners by then...you do the math. She must have had a train run through her.

Realize that I am not telling you to dump her out of ideals and principals (no one goes far with that). There is science behind this. It is psychologically, genetically, biologically, socioeconomically, financially, reproductively and personally COSTLY in having anything to do with a female like that in the long-term.
 tmb519
Joined: 5/30/2010
Msg: 579
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HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/8/2011 5:51:56 PM


The fact is, if you have sex with 100 females you are more likely to meet 1 that has an STI than if you only have sex with 5 females...


The scary thing is a lot of STIs can't be cured, and this is the one fact that doesn't seem to resonate with people nowadays for whatever reason. If it's a virus, as most STIs are, you'll have it 'til you die and can pass it along to someone else.
 tmb519
Joined: 5/30/2010
Msg: 580
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HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/8/2011 5:56:57 PM


The rebuttal to that is that no one can be 100% sure that they are "clean"... Some STI's don't show up in testing... Others may take months to show up...
The other part of that especially for anyone young is that an undetected STI can render a woman infertile... or leave her with a time bomb like cervical cancer... or perhaps weakened liver...


My point EXACTLY. Those that go around saying "it's none of your business" are either embarrassed about their number, in need of a modern day sex-ed class, or just really clueless and think that as long as the guy wears a condom they are good to go. No wonder things like HSV and HPV are spreading like wildfire. Wonder how long it'll take for the general public to figure out that condoms aren't a silver bullet in STI prevention and that a little more caution needs to be exercised before hopping into bed even with protection.
 Arlo_Troutman
Joined: 9/26/2009
Msg: 584
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/9/2011 7:12:44 AM
Verygreeneyez: your original statement was:


ED isn't something you manifest due to boredom in the bedroom.


This could very well be the exact cause. See below, where your very own cribbing of the Mayo Clinic web site torpedoes your own argument.

(as an aside, I love how people become instant experts on anything, because the web says it... there are oodles of doctors/psychotherapists out there, apparently...)

You further state:


The brain plays a key role in triggering the series of physical events that cause an erection, starting with feelings of sexual excitement. A number of things can interfere with sexual feelings and cause or worsen erectile dysfunction. These include:

* Depression, anxiety or other mental health conditions
* Stress
* Fatigue
* Relationship problems due to stress, poor communication or other concerns


It would have been more impressive if you could have done this research before you were called on it, rather than after.

Arlo... rolleyes:
 BigBadNIrish
Joined: 1/31/2011
Msg: 585
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/15/2011 6:09:58 AM

I never said women were less intelligent than men...I said we men are naturally more intellectual.


By posting a statement that is so rife with chauvinism the only point made is exactly the opposite of what was said....
 broncsbuff
Joined: 4/18/2008
Msg: 586
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/15/2011 7:00:36 AM

The fact is, if you have sex with 100 females you are more likely to meet 1 that has an STI than if you only have sex with 5 females...


another fact...

if those 5 women that you slept with ALL slept with 100 guys before you, then your chances are JUST AS GOOD as sleeping with 100 women...

doesnt even have to be a 100...

if ONE of those 5 females slept with ONE person with an std, YOUR AT RISK...

If you are so concerned with how many women/men your partner has slept with, wait about a year with no sex, get tested and be done with it. Even then, its not even a 100%...
 happybunny8
Joined: 4/16/2010
Msg: 587
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/15/2011 9:19:41 AM
^^^yep. Really, it is all up to the individual to take whatever risks they wish to take. However, it really irks me when people do not inform themselves properly about STD's and belittle those who do wish to take as much precautions as they can.

There is much talk on here about people who practice safer sex, but do not wait the minimum 6 month mean time between partners.
 Whatisnewwithyou
Joined: 1/25/2011
Msg: 589
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/15/2011 10:42:20 AM
Maybe the girl in question made up a fake number from being annoyed at the question, just to teach a lesson about minding one's own business. Why be insecure about something that happened back in the pass. This as bad as being jealous over some one's ex boyfriend or girlfriend that was dated 6 or 7 years ago. I think this is very silly.
 Arlo_Troutman
Joined: 9/26/2009
Msg: 590
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/23/2011 7:37:58 AM

(Whatisnewwithhyou) Maybe the girl in question made up a fake number from being annoyed at the question, just to teach a lesson about minding one's own business. Why be insecure about something that happened back in the pass. This as bad as being jealous over some one's ex boyfriend or girlfriend that was dated 6 or 7 years ago. I think this is very silly.


For some people, it's not silly; rather, it's very important. However, I don't think someone should be constantly guilted over his/her number. If either partner has a high number, and it bothers the other, for whatever reason -- they should talk it out, or realize that they're not compatible, and end it.

People should be allowed to have high, low, or average numbers, and it shouldn't be something that they're castigated for. Similarly, though, other people should have the absolute right to be upset about it, also without being castigated for it. I'm nothing if not fair...

Arlo...
 Promise222
Joined: 3/7/2011
Msg: 591
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/23/2011 10:48:49 PM
So your original post was in 2009...are you still together or did she move on to number 16 or whatever.

Just FYI...Women do the same thing as men...if they need some, they get some. If they meet someone they know is not a keeper and they need some, they get some. If she waited to jump into a physical relationship with you then she believes you are a keeper.

Sex is different with every man regardless of size or performance. Sex is different with the same partner every time. So asking a girl to tell you if you are the best...a polite girl will always say yes. It is like asking if these pants make me look fat...you will likely get the polite answer.
 mysterywoman999
Joined: 3/13/2011
Msg: 592
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/24/2011 3:01:41 PM

Just FYI...Women do the same thing as men...if they need some, they get some. If they meet someone they know is not a keeper and they need some, they get some. If she waited to jump into a physical relationship with you then she believes you are a keeper.


Sadly, women are judged for this, and men are not.
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 593
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/24/2011 3:40:38 PM

Many studies have shown that women cheat more often than men.


Sorry. Can't agree. Not remotely what I've seen. This is closer. . . .

with 28 percent of married men and 18 percent of married women admitting to having a sexual liaison, the survey found.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17951664/ns/health-sexual_health/

 mysterywoman999
Joined: 3/13/2011
Msg: 594
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/24/2011 3:49:37 PM

^^^^ well its the one thing we should get away with considering the amount of double standards women get away with.


It is irrational and indefensible to judge women for having casual sex when you feel it is acceptable for men to do so. You want to engage in irrational bias? Go for it; you have lots of company. Thankfully, there are some men who are above that kind of thing.


like comparing a fat woman with a short man, he can't do anything about his height, but she can do something about her weight?


Certainly, a lot of women seem to care about height, but men are just as likely ( in fact, more so IMHO) to care about looks than women are. It doesn't matter if it is height, breast size, weight, her hair colour, or the size of her booty, men judge women by their appearance ALL the time. If many women have one area of strong preference ( height), it still doesn't make men LESS likely to judge women by their appearance.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 596
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HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/24/2011 9:57:17 PM
^^ depends on who's doing the judging!

I'd judge a man that "played" a hundred nice, respectable women far worse than a man
that picked up a hundred drunken skanks but was honest about his intentions.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 598
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HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/25/2011 7:26:38 AM
uh huh.......but I was commenting on this post you made......


Likewise a man would be judged better for sleeping with women he chose carefully, than if he simply fcuked drunken last call skanks...
 happybunny8
Joined: 4/16/2010
Msg: 599
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/25/2011 7:32:04 AM
Maybe if people stopped calling people drunken last call skanks, there would be some progress.....
 kayla1963
Joined: 4/1/2011
Msg: 600
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/25/2011 7:43:34 AM

Maybe if people stopped calling people drunken last call skanks, there would be some progress.....

No kidding, Mr. "Pejorative."
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 601
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 4/25/2011 8:57:55 AM

Maybe if people stopped calling people drunken last call skanks, there would be some progress.....

I'd say we ought to apply the same term to men who are, well, last call drunken skanks.
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