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 marty-gras
Joined: 10/28/2009
Msg: 58
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??Page 3 of 30    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30)
Hey ,dont even think about her past ,just think future ,we all experiment at first .Some we regret some we dont .You 2 shouldnt even be talking about others IMO
Dont let insecurity ruin your life . :)
 Commonsens
Joined: 4/6/2009
Msg: 59
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 12:13:31 PM
Just munching on popcorn and laughing my arse off.
 acuddler
Joined: 10/30/2009
Msg: 60
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 12:21:24 PM
The pill does not protect either of you from STDs. Have her tested several times-to avoid false positive/false negative results. If she tests free of STDs/AIDS, and is willing to confine her future sexual activity to just you, then foerget her past,and accept her as your soul mate/lover. If she continues playing the field while involved with you, leave her alone.
 EdwardPartSix
Joined: 4/6/2007
Msg: 61
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 12:27:45 PM
Say what you want. One night stands + unprotected sex = gross
 bikeman1467
Joined: 9/22/2009
Msg: 62
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HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 12:34:11 PM
Hi I’m looking for some advice on this.
Are ya sure?

I've been around the block a few times but it's different for girls
-right?
Type "Madonna Whore" into Google and read up. Better yet, log onto VirginsAreUs.com and look for your girlfriends there. What's good for the goose is good for the gander. You are looking for a non-reciprocating relationship, have no common sense, or really suffer from a severe lack of self-esteem.

14 in total that she has lay in bed with. Is this very unusual?
Sounds normal for someone who has been an adult for 10 years.

is it safe to have sex with her without a condom?
Dude, it isn't even safe to have sex with her WITH a condom. It definitely is SAFER. Do they teach sex ed in the Ireland?

By the way, the relationship with this woman can't be that good for HER if you have been dating her for TWO YEARS and have a current active dating profile posted on PoF.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 63
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 12:34:52 PM
~OP~ Are you frickin' kidding me? You've been intimate with this gal for 2 years and are just now talking about the past? Oy!!! I hope she reads this and leaves your whiny azz. JMO
 Chasing~Cars
Joined: 1/4/2010
Msg: 64
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 12:35:22 PM
Really 25; I’m with Danielle! For some, maturity brings with it tolerance, compassion and empathy, the ability to look past ones own selfishness and petty moral judgments to see what is really there in a person. I for one would rather be with a whore who choose me of her own free will than be with a virgin who did only what she thought others wanted her to do and remained forever questioning.

Some of us have battle scars along with some of the spoils of war, others only have illusions of a pure righteous kingdom. Last time I checked, we all learn in different ways but I have never seen anyone learn anything of value by finger pointing.
 Cicciolina
Joined: 7/4/2009
Msg: 65
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 12:36:25 PM
what you want. One night stands + unprotected sex =gross

Give me a break..... Things happen when people drink to much or whatever.... Maybe, she was prey to predators, which linger around nightclubs around closing time....who knows..
I have had a one night stand myself. I don't think I am gross either...
 colt8301
Joined: 10/25/2006
Msg: 66
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 12:49:41 PM
well hugo, you got good news, go get yourself checked out. Luckily she was upfront with you but then again who really knows? Now the too many men thing? I think it depends on the person 14 at 28 with one night stands peppered in there, would probably be a deal breaker for me, i don't go to bed with just anybody so i couldn't possibly go with someone who goes to bed with just "anybody".

as far as the is women with a large number the same as a man with a large number, yes.

You can call me sexist and every name under the sun, but "women" can get laid easier than a man. An average woman can go outside and yell "please somebody, screw me!" and she'll have a line around the corner. An "average" man goes out and yell that same phrase, he would not get a second look. bottom line woman don't have to work to get laid, men do, so you have a point there.

Use a condom. good luck
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 67
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HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 12:59:40 PM
So Hugo......
these 10 women you slept with.....and increased their number by 1......
did your having sex with them put them over this "magical number" of acceptance for a LTR with another man?

All you men that think it's OK for a man to be promiscous........are the ones guilty
of upping all these girls numbers.
So.......every time you have sex with a girl.........you are ruining her chances of
a future relationship because all the judgemental hypocrites want a virgin for a wife!

as for asking "if I'm the best"..........if you have to ask........you will never be anybody's best!!

as for the condoms...........yeah.......well......just be damn glad she is still having sex with you while you're here looking for some strange!
 neo2u
Joined: 11/4/2009
Msg: 68
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 1:06:54 PM
I agree with the post above. Men have to work twice as hard to get laid. Most women just have to show up. I personally take this little fun fact into account when making the final decision as to who I'll sleep with. I'm not going to sleep with a girl who will have sex with just anybody and/or everybody. For one thing sharing on that level is just gross and for another it's just not safe. The worst case scenario is not worth the risk, despite how great the sex is.

Men and women are not equal. They never will be. So don't worry about the tally. You'll give yourself an anxiety disorder trying to measure your past experiences like it's some sort of score board.

Speaking of past experiences, if you've been with this girl for two years, and presumably still with her, then why the hell do you have an active account on a dating website? Seems a little sketchy and hypocritical.
 Red Fish GF
Joined: 12/3/2009
Msg: 69
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HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 1:09:33 PM

I've been around the block a few times but it's different for girls
-right? ....


Why is it different for girls? If a woman wants to sleep with a man for a one night stand or on a first date she is no more a slut than the guy. I personally need an emotional attachment before having sex but some people don't and it shouldn't be any different for her than the fact you've been around too. Probably way more than her.

Don't ever ask her to compare you to her other lovers. She could lie and say you are the best she ever had or as she did just state she would rather not say. After 2 years if the relationship is going well why dwell on the past? Eight men is not that many and I agree with others it isn't a bad thing that she waited to sleep with you.


I've always believed in love before sex but when I was back in the dating world I tried finding love with sex. I had one drunken one night stand. I believe in sharing the past and my SO doesn't hold it against me that he is number 6. Asking how you compare, still can't believe you asked her that.
 savepolarbears
Joined: 12/27/2009
Msg: 70
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 1:09:54 PM
Junkyard
I've heard it from couple of my Irish guy friends. But yeah I should admit that it is not right thing to say if I don't have experiences living there.
I bet you know exactly what's going on in your country. I wish you don't get offended by my post. My bad and I apologize.
 Chill Pill
Joined: 11/19/2009
Msg: 71
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 1:36:56 PM
Wow.. Why didn't you just title this:

" HELP ME- I AM VERY INSECURE"
or

" HELP ME- IM GETTING IN MY OWN WAY'
or

"HELP ME- I AM AN EGOMANIAC"
or

"HELP ME- I DON'T KNOW HOW TO F&CK"

Really, Whats the real problem? It's definitely ABOUT YOU? Not about your girl or how many men she has slept with.

Is it penis size? Get over it, it's not gonna get any bigger not at 28. .

"HELP ME- I HAVE A SMALL MIND AND A SMALL PP TOO"


Edit:::
HOLD ON... I just found out the problem from your previous post.. IF you were talking about the same girl......

""" She also told me she has had a lot of guys back to her house, mainly because she got drunk.
I cant bear the thought of them all having their hands all over her, and being inside her, especially as I has to work hard for 6 months to get into her!.""

LOL.. She made YOU wait 6 months.. Oh yeah. Now I see why you think you got ripped off.. You had to play the nice guy for 6 months and WAIT.. and she Boinked all these others in a drunken stupor on the first night.. Okay, Now I get it. Six months, you must have gone through a lot of boxes of tissue.. No???? Blue balls much???
Ha. Must have been HARD... lol lol lol SIX MONTHS.. Oh that must have felt like an eternity.. LOL.

 MeNmyshadow
Joined: 12/16/2006
Msg: 72
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HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 1:55:21 PM
First, you've been around the block a few times...so don't judge her because she's female. Why on earth, unless you really wanted to know appear okay with her NOT undercovering this until you chose to ask how you performed? Sounds like you don't like tje truth! She should consider dumping YOU!!
 onefishwilldo
Joined: 4/1/2009
Msg: 73
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 1:58:17 PM
Without reading all the other posts. Here's my two cents.

Unless she's an extremely ugly woman, she is going to get date/boyfriends and have sex with them. Hopefully she has good taste and not sleeping with all of them. BUT, what she did before your time is her business. You shouldn't ask and she didn't have to answer to you. What she is doing while with you is the IMPORTANT factor. So if she means everything to you, drop her past and concentrate on the future with her.

Love her just as she is and don't try to change her. You can't change anyone but yourself.

Next time, if you don't want to know...don't ask. Because majority of people cannot handle the truth.
 realitybites78
Joined: 7/10/2009
Msg: 74
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 2:16:31 PM
She sounds pretty skanky to me imo...multiple one night stands and some of them without a condomn? This is good you received this information though. I'd probably move on she sounds way too loose to me. In regards to how you compare to her that's one of the many problems with having too many partners. You're always comparing your current lover to someone in the past, which is kind of shallow really.

Person above me exemplifies what's wrong with our society...yeah ok just because a woman can get banged every night by a different guy does that mean she should? We all know women can get sex very easily. Some of us like women with control.

 Red Fish GF
Joined: 12/3/2009
Msg: 75
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HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 2:30:45 PM

You see shes always made out that she is very shy and wouldnt be
with anyone before me,



This is the only part you have any reason to be concerned about but then again if she knew your reaction she probably was wise in her decision. Now she felt after 2 or 3 yrs together you deserved the truth and after she confides in you you want to throw away an otherwise good relationship. Maybe she has changed and didn't want you judging her from her past.



I think she needs to break up with you because you obviously think less of her now. Respect is an important part of a healthy relationship. It is a double standard for you to think it is ok to of slept around but not ok if she did.
 ellena.
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 76
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HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 2:40:59 PM
No it is not safe to have sex w/ her without a condom. The other issues you need to work out w/ yourself.
 Discerning Virtuosa
Joined: 6/10/2008
Msg: 77
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HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 2:46:07 PM
I'm going to quote a different poster on a different thread:



Guys will support sex by third date or some other horsesh1t, that suits their agenda, and yet expect there to be a virtuous maiden awaiting them at the end of the day!lol


For the last time, a woman is not a cheater just because she embraces her own sexuality.
OP at your age a woman with more experience than you should be appreciated and welcomed by you. So she doesn't act like a party girl - still waters run deep. Just because she is not very bold socially doesn't mean she has to live like a nun. It's quite possible when she was younger she fell for the BS that guys gave her, and now she knows how to be more discerning. When you know better, you do better. She obviously is not choosing to be promiscuous any more and is being very honest with you.

I'm tellin ya, a MAN judging a WOMAN who enjoys sex is definitely the pot calling the kettle black.
If she has given no reason to mistrust her, use protection, go get tested together and enjoy yourselves. Either break up with her or quit judging her.
Go ahead OP, date and marry some frigid little prim donna and THEN see how happy you are.
 OhioCountry65
Joined: 12/6/2009
Msg: 78
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 2:52:27 PM
I think your overthinking this issue Hugo, afterall she is with you now unless you can not get passed this then she will move on.

Also, the younger generation seems to have had more relations with different people than us older folks. I think I read somewhere that it use to be one different partner for every 10 years was the average although today's mid 30 something and below it was more like one different partner for every 3 to 5 years. Hell, I hear teens these days are into the gang bang thing so who nows? (aka - not the expert here, just going on memory)

My advice would be to you would be to do it often with her whereby your confidence should impove. lol - sorta like fill the hole dude.
 kizmesweetly
Joined: 1/1/2010
Msg: 79
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HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 3:19:04 PM
What happened in the past should stay in the past. What happened then should have no bearing on what is happening now if you really care for the lady. Sometimes curiousity gets the best of us and we feel the need to ask. It's just opening up a can of worms. At least she was honest with you.

Because she had not slept with you that first night, does not mean she liked you less. It probably just means that she cared enough to get to know you better. And to ask her to compare your bedroom antics is really a dating no no. It makes you seem insecure.
Just let it go and move forward. The more you harp on what happened will probably end up pushing her away from you.

There is no difference in whether a guy has been around the block or the woman. It's just that the woman gets the reputation. (Not cool)

Try not to be to judgmental. If you care for the lady as you say you do, then let the past be the past.
 sweetness-one
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 80
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HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 3:26:36 PM
So out of all these "shocking" revelations you received that night, OP...your first immediate thought (and apparently biggest concern) was how you ranked???

Are you sure it's not so much a "numbers" issue, as it is that your nose is just out of joint that she didn't immediately answer "Oh, you're the best by far, honey"?

If the girl didn't flat-out tell you she was a virgin when the two of you hooked up (which would be a blatant lie), then why are you worrying about this now, 2 years later? And, why would you wait 2 years to grill her on this subject anyway, if it was that important to you that she have a pristine past?

I still think it's the rank-issue that has your nose out of joint more than anything else.
 kawasakiprincess
Joined: 5/13/2007
Msg: 81
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 3:41:37 PM
um should she have kept it to her self? or for you to not of asked to begin with knowing you cant handle the truth and what do you mean its different for girls??? before i jump the gun
 Warped_Humour
Joined: 10/10/2009
Msg: 82
HELP ME - GIRLFRIEND HAS BEEN WITH TOO MANY MEN??
Posted: 1/21/2010 3:44:05 PM
I am pretty much in denial any of this is real. However, if it is may I have your Gf's number/email address? Yeah, I'd like to let her know to RUN THE F*CK AWAY FROM YOU!!

I don't need you to post a pic on here. I am sure your pic is in the slang dictionary under DOUCHEBAG!!!

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