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 nemeski
Joined: 12/14/2009
Msg: 51
~Page 3 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
I burst out laughing when I read your post, scurvy little spider! What a great sense of humor. I enjoyed your frankness. It's so refreshing to read posts from 'real' people on here. I love it when I see people embrace who they are, blemishes included, and NOT make excuses for it.

You've given me hope, and I thank you for that.

~nemeski
 jeeperspeepers
Joined: 12/23/2007
Msg: 52
view profile
History
~
Posted: 1/30/2010 2:59:33 PM
Farcal Hollis...what a wonderful forum...I've read this complete forum from beginning to end. Read your profile. You sound like a genuine person, which I have to admit I have found lacking in most men on this site. I too have given up at times and hidden my profile, never deleting it because I do love the Forums, but like you I have deleted the text in my profile, left it out, started over, any and all of the above. Age is a contributing factor for women, but not the only factor....which is another subject in itself. Your honesty is refreshing. You are an attractive man, worthy of any woman's attention, so don't belittle yourself. And yes many women have the same feelings of insecurity. I know I do...and always have. Some women never seem insecure, and I envy those ladies.

Your posts give me a glimmer of hope, that there are other honest men on this site, who are intelligent. How far are you from Virginia? LOL
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 53
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Posted: 1/30/2010 3:24:09 PM

If I have to read another profile that states "I don't look, act, or feel my age" I think I'm gonna puke!

Me, too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Come on, already!! I hate to be the Bad News Fairy to those people, but I have yet to meet one of those self-professors who looked anything BUT their age. Not only am I sick of those "I can keep up with men/women half my age, I have the energy of the Energizer Bunny on crack and I'm told I look 35." people, I'm sick and I mean SICK of the age liars. At this rate? I'm gonna be single forever or I'm going to have to give in and date those who are younger. There really is no winning once in my age bracket with those in my age bracket. It's too bad. **shrug**
 nemeski
Joined: 12/14/2009
Msg: 54
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Posted: 1/30/2010 4:24:45 PM
Good post, greeneyez!

I just read another one that said "although I'm 47 I'm told I don't look older than 37." (puke, retch..) I'm thinking I may rewrite my profile and say "although I'm 52, I'm told I look 62. But they're SO WRONG - I've actually got the extra wrinkles/age spots of a woman in her 70's."

Do you think THAT would catch me a fella?

~nemeski
 farcal hollis
Joined: 1/14/2010
Msg: 55
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Posted: 1/30/2010 4:33:54 PM
MORE wonderful posts! Wow, thank you ladies!

Someone PM'd me to ask if this is a real name...no, it's not...and it has a story behind it, but I can't tell it here...the "mods" would kick me out.

I think that all of you ladies who have responded here, have nothing to hide, no reason to post anything about yourselves other than the plain truth!
 tinkerbellcgy
Joined: 9/17/2005
Msg: 56
view profile
History
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 1/30/2010 4:41:04 PM

I just read another one that said "although I'm 47 I'm told I don't look older than 37." (puke, retch..) I'm thinking I may rewrite my profile and say "although I'm 52, I'm told I look 62. But they're SO WRONG - I've actually got the extra wrinkles/age spots of a woman in her 70's."

Do you think THAT would catch me a fella?

Yes, I do actually think that would catch you a fella. If for no other reason, you will get contacted because it is humoursly written. When I had humour in my profile, I was receiving a steady stream of e-mails. Not that they all materialized in dates or relationships but it was a good indicator of the traffic that stopped to read my profile and some have remained online friends ever since.

As for all this hyperbole about looking younger, being an Energizer bunny, blah, blah, blah, yada, yada, yada it is nothing more than hyperbole and most people reading it know that. The really sad part of profiles like that is that they are composed from the author's own perception of themself and not what or how other people perceive them to be or how they really are.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 57
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 1/30/2010 4:56:25 PM

I just read another one that said "although I'm 47 I'm told I don't look older than 37." (puke, retch..) I'm thinking I may rewrite my profile and say "although I'm 52, I'm told I look 62. But they're SO WRONG - I've actually got the extra wrinkles/age spots of a woman in her 70's."

LMAO !! I dunno if that'd catch you a fella, but I'd date you if I was of that persuasion. Just for the simple fact you're funnnnnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 ankkka
Joined: 8/29/2007
Msg: 58
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 1/31/2010 6:29:28 AM
Your past is only your past.
Who cares how handsome you were long time ago?
Your real time is now!Too bad...if your confidence is only physical appearance!

By the way...I see often friends from my past...people who were so attractive when they were young...more attractive than any celebreties...but now...they don't look the same way and some of them are not happy and alone.
And for some ugly people beauty came later...they are physical attractive now.
 Free-At-Last
Joined: 7/15/2009
Msg: 59
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 1/31/2010 7:29:03 AM

I guess an answer to my question (What can a guy in his 60s reasonably expect) is that we can expect what we give.

Very true Farcal.
If you are experiencing any "I think my life is passing me by" moments...it's time to get outta the passenger seat and back into the drivers seat!
Like a fine wine, some people just get better with age.
Embrace it. Accept it. Live life with a purpose.
 FluffyBrain
Joined: 3/11/2007
Msg: 60
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 1/31/2010 3:28:28 PM
Self Pity threads, redundant Questions and threads with no point/chat threads will be deleted.
There's a reason for that redundancy. Often the reason is people haven't quite found an adequate, enlightening answer, so they continue to ask. The fact that certain questions are repeatedly posed underscores the importance of the question in so many minds. It also underscores the fact that an adequate answer may not exist.


Would I sound more attractive if I claimed I was still "just as good as I ever was"? Should I be dishonest about myself in hopes of being more attractive?


That depends on your definition of attractiveness. It's subjective. It's somewhat artificial to think as people age they're unattractive, senile, or anything else negative. In some societies, older people are revered for their wisdom. In our society, we have lost sight of that. I suppose it becomes a reality if all believe it. On the other hand, there is is a certain level of undeniable biology there where the physical appearance is concerned. Then again, I like to think we're evolved enough as a species to not necessarily allow out reproductive urges to control our lives! Having said that, I'll admit to not being physically attracted to older men. Gee, does that make me a hypocrite?!!
 el lagarto
Joined: 4/29/2009
Msg: 61
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 1/31/2010 3:51:18 PM
As far as I can see , the biggest problem here is the mindset . Of course we ALL age , and changes inevitably take place . But many of those changes can be modified , and even reversed , with some dedication to maintaining one's health through regular exercise, a conscious diet, and a positive attitude .

Might help to look around you - many are way worse off. Try and concentrate on what you HAVE - not what you've LOST .

Unfortunately , it's this sort of attitude that often turns me off to men my own age . The mind over matter thing concerning age : if you don't mind - it don't matter !

I hear too many 50+ folks using "at my age ... " , and " I'm too old to do that ...".

Self limiting thinking . Look around you - do some research . There are plenty of folks way past your age , that are growing , thriving , accomplishing , loving - all sorts of things !

Maybe you're not as good as you ever were - but just maybe , in many areas , you have the capacity to be BETTER than you ever were !
 FluffyBrain
Joined: 3/11/2007
Msg: 62
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 1/31/2010 4:02:03 PM

I don't even expect to attract women my own age...that's the whole point of my topic!!
and
than I am in kidding myself by chasing after younger women!
The point is you wish to attract younger women (even if you don't expect it's a real possibility).

As an aside, I'm not sure why cougars attract younger men, yet the opposite doesn't work for older men (with exception of wealthy older men). Come to think of it, I do know why: as long a woman is attractive, the younger guys are attracted with the caveat being, neither party expects it to last. It works well because the older woman frequently has "been there and done it," so she often isn't interested in settling down any more than is the younger guy. The women in their 40's who manage to become cougars are those women who aren't yet saggy in the face and they often come with sleek bodies, longer hair, and the like...we're talking the Demi Moore types. A generation ago, women in their 40's looked frumpier than they do today. You don't see as many men 40+ who are the male equivalent of Demi Moore. Cougars tend to be very proactive about their looks, right down to plastic surgery if necessary; often appearing to be in their 30's. However, in general, men think it's OK to have grey hair, extra weight, etc., so they don't tend to look as good as their cougar counterparts. So, the moral for the older guys: get yourself a damned good plastic surgeon!!!
 FluffyBrain
Joined: 3/11/2007
Msg: 63
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 1/31/2010 4:05:43 PM

If I have to read another profile that states "I don't look, act, or feel my age" I think I'm gonna puke!

lol @ that one! that quote is as ubiquitous as "i'm active and i enjoy every sport under the sun," "i dress up as well as i wear jeans and tee-short," and a myriad of others!
 breath~
Joined: 1/13/2008
Msg: 64
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 2/1/2010 6:11:23 AM
I'm certainly not as good (physically) as I ever was.
In a whole lot of ways.
But yesterday I was determined that I would shovel the snow on my sidewalk and I DID.
So there.


If you think it was easy, try shoveling while sitting down.

I think our determination to LIVE and a good attitude towards living, is way more important than how the heck we look.
 farcal hollis
Joined: 1/14/2010
Msg: 65
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 2/1/2010 6:22:39 AM
Okay, once again, I thank everyone for your comments...and such kind words in many replies!

What I've learned here is very valuable, very meaningful to me.

A definite "attitude adjustment" is now well underway.

Yes, I see a few posts that make me thing that a few have missed my point, both in my original post, and my later posts, but that is okay, I'm not complaining. What really makes me feel good, and I believe I mentioned this somewhere above, is that everyone has been helpful and positive...no hateful, or derisive posts, as I have seen in a few other threads! So, anyone who doubts that a good, positive discussion can't be found here, read this thread! Here it is!
 dave91741
Joined: 5/10/2009
Msg: 66
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 2/1/2010 9:04:30 AM
I feel that maybe we should not be as cool or sophisticated as we once were . Last night went Dancin and the age of the people was about 50-90 for the most part . They were in all stages of ageing and health just trying and suceeding at haveing some fun . Everyone there looked great because of that attitude . I got asked to dance a lot . I had never done their kind of dance and learned it very quickly . I danced with all kinds of ladies . It was a lot of fun . This group taught me a lot about being social . As far as not being a cool sophistcated person "I am as good as I ever was ". Actually better ..... IF you still feel you are to neat to be your age maybe you will never understand what I am saying . I feel if we care for ourselves we should treat ourselves better.
 Vicshe
Joined: 5/18/2009
Msg: 67
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 2/1/2010 10:31:58 AM
Now that you've posted a photo, I see that you are quite "hot," as they say.


So, the bottom line question is not "what do men in their 60s want?", it's "what can men in their 60s reasonably expect?"


What I meant before (and didn't say very well) was that when you stop digging your heels in and being dragged by time against your will towards an age you don't want to be, that is when you can appreciate what is in front of you. You are going in a certain direction, as we all are, and resistance is completely futile. Relax into it. It sounds like you're in the process of that. There are things about you now that are better than they once were: your heart, mind and soul. You said so yourself. Those things are more important than the package they are wrapped in. When you really realize that, then you will find that those intangible qualities in others are what attracts you to them. And those qualities in you will attract others to you. A whole new world will open to you, and what you can expect is exactly what you want.
 farcal hollis
Joined: 1/14/2010
Msg: 68
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 2/2/2010 7:57:06 AM

Woah now. Are you the same guy who had 2 rocking chairs on his porch he made himself? Of course, you need not answer; and, I may have it/you all wrong. But if you are he, then I like you soooo much better now, admitting vulnerability, which means you're human, and all shit like that.


I had to come back and respond to this. No, I never had two rocking chairs on my porch...I don't even have a porch.

And yes, I'll admit to vulnerability. I'll admit to just about anything that goes with having lived 63 years...and that includes having learned a lot...from life in general, and more specifically from words I've read in this thread.

The thoughts expressed here about aging, and being who we are, as we are, are not unfamiliar or new to me. I'd just lost sight of them for a while. Now that I've been geek-slapped back to reality, I think I'll be feeling a lot better!
 Calientecutie
Joined: 4/5/2009
Msg: 69
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 2/5/2010 5:48:02 PM
a woman to love and cuddle...and if not a teddy bear will do...seriously what any normal person want love...at any age
 Wyenot01
Joined: 12/24/2008
Msg: 70
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 2/5/2010 8:31:15 PM
Hollis, I cut to the chase and didn't even read whatever else was written by others.

As you probably already know, you've tapped into the psyche of a bevy of women, and they are probably right this minute emailing you avowing the same thing.

whatever

Have you ever read the "Velveteen Rabbit"? It's a children's book that offers some big truths about loving something (someone) that's been around for years and has had all its fur (hair) rubbed (fallen) off.

I've always strived to see the person inside the persona. And I hope that my counterpart would do the same. It doesn't always happen that way and dating at this age is not pretty, but honesty will out, in my humble opinion.

Keep on truckin'!

 farcal hollis
Joined: 1/14/2010
Msg: 71
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 2/5/2010 9:01:54 PM

Hollis, I cut to the chase and didn't even read whatever else was written by others.

As you probably already know, you've tapped into the psyche of a bevy of women, and they are probably right this minute emailing you avowing the same thing.

whatever

Have you ever read the "Velveteen Rabbit"? It's a children's book that offers some big truths about loving something (someone) that's been around for years and has had all its fur (hair) rubbed (fallen) off.

I've always strived to see the person inside the persona. And I hope that my counterpart would do the same. It doesn't always happen that way and dating at this age is not pretty, but honesty will out, in my humble opinion.

Keep on truckin'!


Thank you for this response Miss Wyenot. When you get time, you really should go back and read the rest of this thread. The posts have been wonderful!

I'm not sure about tapping into anyones' psyches, but I have had a few very nice and encouraging PMs.

I am vaguely remembering the stiry you are referring to...I was a school teacher for thirty years, and even though I taught instrumental music, the story still stands out in my mind. It reminds me that stored away, I still have my childhood teddy bear...he's the same age I am. He was bought the day I was born. He's pretty well worn, as I remember. He's stored away with things like my deceased mother's engagement and wedding rings, and some WW II food and gas rationing coupons, and some Ellis Island immigration papers from some of my ancestors.

Am I sentimental? Absolutely! I'll admit to that!
 daffie
Joined: 8/1/2007
Msg: 72
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 2/6/2010 3:19:53 AM
remember the seinfeld episode when george approached a woman and told her...
"i'm bald, broke and live with my parents"?...
telling the truth worked a charm for him...
it's a shame that same philosopy isn't adopted more readily by others...

back to the op...
you have three of the things that i love in a man...
a bike,
intelligence,
and humour.

oooops, i almost forgot the teddy bear...
 farcal hollis
Joined: 1/14/2010
Msg: 73
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 2/6/2010 6:26:12 AM

"i'm bald, broke and live with my parents"?...
telling the truth worked a charm for him...
it's a shame that same philosopy isn't adopted more readily by others...

back to the op...
you have three of the things that i love in a man...
a bike,
intelligence,
and humour.

oooops, i almost forgot the teddy bear...


Well, I'm bald and broke, but my parents are long gone, so I live with a lazy old bulldog. I do, however, live in a tumbled-down old house that once belonged to my parents...in fact the land has been in the family since the early 1900s, and my house was built in 1937, intended to be my great-grandfather's chicken coop. Not very attractive to most ladies, I'm afraid. It's far from resembling an "estate", but the deer and other critters like it here, and if it's good enough for them....'cept they don't help a bit with paying the ever-increasing taxes!

Miss Daffie, thank you for your kind words. I've always enjoyed your posts!
 damassteel
Joined: 7/22/2009
Msg: 74
view profile
History
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 2/6/2010 8:25:46 AM
To start out with I don't date online here as my social scene provides ample opportunities to meet women of all kinds and ages. At my age (going on 61) I still enjoy an uncommonly good state of health and fitness. It's hard to even respond to threads like this without sounding smug or arrogant, but I am how I am, which is confident that I can expect to date women of any age I might choose. I've been on these fora for a while now and have posted to these kinds of threads before. Often I get responses to my posts that indicate to me, misery loves company. No one wants to hear me talking about how good I feel or good I think I look.
My son(30) and I often go out together, We even danced in the same dance company for a couple of years. He's in a pic with me in my profile pics. When we're out, all the same women who want to hang with him, want to hang with me as well.
Now just because I can; I'm not always sure I should...I have dated lots of young women in their 30's, but I realize there's no future in it. I much prefer ladies mid 40's to 50 or so, but they must match my level of fitness and attractiveness.
And yes, I feel that I'm very attractive; I get a lot of postive reinforcement from women of all ages, so I know there's something to it.
And I'm not trying to be younger. I'm just trying to live as well as I can, AS I am. If that means still enjoying an active social life and satisfying work and leisure, then it is what it is, And I'm really thankful for all of it.
 farcal hollis
Joined: 1/14/2010
Msg: 75
As Good As I Ever Was.....NOT!!!
Posted: 2/6/2010 10:42:44 AM
If that is where you are at age 60, then more power to ya! Rock on!! Enjoy it!! No one can hold anything against you for your life style, and I'd be the last one on earth to think you are smug or arrogant just because you can do things that I can't.
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