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 tuckmods
Joined: 9/2/2016
Msg: 62
when you're in love with someone who is not in love with youPage 4 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
Haven't read other posts here . . but unrequited Love is a sum zero game. Can't tell you how to get over him, but I know that if you don't do so, you will ruin your future.

I say end the friendship. Trash all letters and photos of him and from him, and think bad thoughts about him. Eventually your mind will actually stop loving him if it convinces itself it doesn't
 Shewymacfee
Joined: 4/2/2016
Msg: 63
when you're in love with someone who is not in love with you
Posted: 9/15/2016 12:55:17 PM
Oh dear if anyone could trully analize LOVE they would be the richest person on this planet, it hits everyone differently
In your case you have gone down the route of changing your life to be with your perfect partner and trying to do everything possible to be with him.

Unfortunately your chosen one does not feel the same way.

I don't know the reasons why he did not finish the relationship if he knows he is not feeling the same as you, could be possible that he wants you as his bit on the side, without the responsibilities.

I do presume that you have talked things over, explaining your feelings, if so you really should have ended all contact with him their and then, if not have the talk, see what happens if there is no changes then call it a day.

Believe me, if you do leave him. the feelings for this guy will fade in time, but once you have made your mind up, don't go back, If you do you will more than likely end up in the same horrible place you are in at the moment.

Only you can change things for the better, no one else, you have to be strong in your desicions then stick to them.
Hard? Yes, But hopefully the lesson has been learned and you will think twice about going down this road again.
 BlasphemousBombshell
Joined: 11/19/2013
Msg: 64
when you're in love with someone who is not in love with you
Posted: 9/15/2016 7:24:46 PM
He is not "everything" you want in a person. On the contrary, he doesn't have the most BASIC thing the vast majority of women want: the ability to commit to you. Your first step in this process is in stopping yourself when you sing his praises and become utterly honest with yourself about how does NOT fit you and has some major character flaws. Start with how the hell a man has a lady move her entire life to be closer to him and then drop the bomb AFTER that they should just be friends? Logical and moral people make DAMN sure they want a commitment before they begin inviting people to uproot their whole life. If you didn't act a fool while living near him and offered a LEGITIMATE reason for his to change his mind, then you should begin to wonder if he addicted to novelty, if he is dishonest, or fickle, etc. When you start seeing his flaws, we don't seem like such a dream boat anymore and will become VERY easy to replace...
 hemingway234
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 65
when you're in love with someone who is not in love with you
Posted: 9/16/2016 8:03:59 AM
This is an old thread. Most of the posters have probably passed on to that coffee shop in the sky.

Date other people. You have to find someone who loves you back.
 BlasphemousBombshell
Joined: 11/19/2013
Msg: 66
when you're in love with someone who is not in love with you
Posted: 9/16/2016 10:41:28 AM
Its irksome that many of the threads on the front page of a subforum are so old. I suspect its because many new threads are deleted for the sake of consolidation. (I know i have had many of my own new threads deleted or threads locked without any notice). Maybe the mods are guarding their server space? Which would be a legitimate reason. But its not very condusive to an active board.
 InnerGorilla2
Joined: 8/1/2016
Msg: 67
when you're in love with someone who is not in love with you
Posted: 9/16/2016 1:57:26 PM

Its irksome that many of the threads on the front page of a subforum are so old. I suspect its because many new threads are deleted for the sake of consolidation. (I know i have had many of my own new threads deleted or threads locked without any notice).


Unfortunately you're right. When people come here, instead of welcoming them, we slap them on the face and call their post redundant, trolling, overdone and the list goes on. So what, welcome the new people. We are to trigger happy to delete, so offended by whatever some new person post that the place is getting more boring, more and more inconsequential.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 68
when you're in love with someone who is not in love with you
Posted: 9/16/2016 3:56:31 PM
That's a p0lite way of saying, we use them for entertainment and then wonder why they don't stick around to entertain us more. Indeed, what happens when we love their stories more than they love our reactions :)

on a more serious note, a post might be old, but human nature repeats itself. someone else might be having that problem, now, somewhere.
 yourstillhere
Joined: 7/30/2008
Msg: 69
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History
when you're in love with someone who is not in love with you
Posted: 9/18/2016 1:50:25 PM

When people come here, instead of welcoming them, we slap them on the face and call their post redundant, trolling, overdone and the list goes on.


Yes, and THATS not very nice :(
 Whatsamattababy
Joined: 5/3/2016
Msg: 70
when you're in love with someone who is not in love with you
Posted: 9/18/2016 1:54:31 PM
I don't get it... What are people for, if not to entertain me?
 Doremi_Fasolatido
Joined: 2/14/2009
Msg: 71
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History
when you're in love with someone who is not in love with you
Posted: 9/18/2016 2:47:09 PM
Entertainment is my life.... Wind me up and watch me do tricks. Call on me and I'll be there to offer my special brand of love, unconditionally and on your terms.,

Such seems to be the case when love is a one way street.,
 SummmerEve
Joined: 7/6/2014
Msg: 72
when you're in love with someone who is not in love with you
Posted: 10/1/2016 8:34:52 PM
are you sure you want an insight? the truthful one, how about that?

You stayed in contact with him for all these years because you secretly hoped that 'one day he would love you back'. You have been delusional and living in a fantasy world. In other words you have been living in DENIAL. You would still rather live in denial because waking up and facing reality would mean taking action. Taking action means admitting to yourself that you are in one-sided relationship and the only way out of it is cutting ALL CONTACT and moving on with your life.
The no contact rule - how to stay strong - http://beluckyinlove.net/the-no-contact-rule-how-to-stay-strong/ <-- you will need it .
 Imurman2119
Joined: 9/28/2016
Msg: 73
when you're in love with someone who is not in love with you
Posted: 10/4/2016 7:33:54 PM
A girl I've been friends with for six years wrote me a love letter, but I was surprised that she felt that way and told her to take it slow, one day at a time. I never shared feelings with her, and we have been strictly friends. We live 8 hours apart, and get together once a year. We e-mail and talk on the phone on a regular basis. I guess neither of us has the heart to break this off since we've been friends for so long, yet we both know there will never be a future for us as far as love and romance goes. She wants to be married some day, but I told her that I didn't know what I want. Yes, we are stringing each other along with no romance or love on the horizon.
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 74
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History
when you're in love with someone who is not in love with you
Posted: 10/4/2016 8:57:07 PM
unrequited love is different to having had a relationship and it is over. It is very painful and it takes time to heal, whatever . However thinking bad thoughts only injures you. If a person does not love you back, that is not their fault. If they have lied to you about it and deceived you into thinking they do, that is another matter. By all means get rid of any reminders of him.
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 75
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History
when you're in love with someone who is not in love with you
Posted: 10/4/2016 9:01:25 PM
Imurman

why this girl that lives so far away and you have known each other for so long, but hardly see each other, wants to be married to you, is hard to fathom. I think she is having a fantasy affair and really hardly knows you. Getting together once a year is a tryst and not a relationship. Let us hope for her sake she actually finds someone who wants to have a full relationship with someone she sees regularly and the same for you.
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