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 lifeisgrand5
Joined: 12/29/2014
Msg: 382
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Approaching the subject of sex with older womenPage 14 of 18    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)
I think it is pitiful that you ask such a private question on a dating forum. I hear the same thing over and over from older guys. They brag that they still have high sex drives. I had a 60 year old on Sunday tell me that he had the sex drive of two 25 year olds. Brag, brag, brag. What ever happened to romance ? People have over analyzed sex to where it is just an act. Why not make it something special ?
 deetristate
Joined: 12/4/2014
Msg: 383
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 1/21/2015 4:13:10 AM
Yes. Many talk, talk, talk.
No pills please.
To answer the question - about date 7. ( date can be coffee, a burger, renting a movie, fancy expensive dinner, a bike ride, a free art show opening, a beer at O'Molly's) Then. (Of course there was some "show I am interested approaching"(wink wink) before this)
Assuming she didn't advertise that she is here for drive by only.
 CuriousInDB
Joined: 7/12/2014
Msg: 384
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 1/21/2015 4:30:17 AM
Uh ... Yeah. Let's get back on track here.


What ever happened to romance ? People have over analyzed sex to where it is just an act. Why not make it something special ?


Exactly. But not this:

I think it is pitiful that you ask such a private question on a dating forum.


It's going to be difficult to avoid the topic of sex on a dating forum.
 Never_in_Life
Joined: 1/13/2015
Msg: 385
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 1/21/2015 4:40:35 AM

I think it is pitiful that you ask such a private question on a dating forum. I hear the same thing over and over from older guys. They brag that they still have high sex drives. I had a 60 year old on Sunday tell me that he had the sex drive of two 25 year olds. Brag, brag, brag. What ever happened to romance ? People have over analyzed sex to where it is just an act. Why not make it something special ?


Generally speaking, the more a person brags, the less reason they have to brag.

I have no idea why some men go straight for their sexual "prowess" right out of the box. It makes no sense - I have never met a woman who wanted to know about how good a man is in bed within 30 seconds of an introduction. Whatever. Guys like that make me look great. So, thanks morons!

BTW- the fourth pic of your profile - the one of you in the hospital with Minnie Mouse outfit is insanely adorable. It just gave me diabetes. I hope you're happy.
 TrustInKarma
Joined: 12/26/2014
Msg: 386
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 2/4/2015 9:58:16 AM

I had a 60 year old on Sunday tell me that he had the sex drive of two 25 year olds. Brag, brag, brag. What ever happened to romance ? People have over analyzed sex to where it is just an act. Why not make it something special ?


Yes, highly doubtful. I've been with guys in their mid/late 40s, and those were in-shape military men (Ranger, SF), but even they could not hold a candle to the vigor of guys in their 20s. Just no comparison. A 20 year old man is ready to go several times within an hour, the 40-something ones not so much. Just saying.

I've also had several dates recently where after dinner, the guys thought they earned the "right" to make out with me afterwards. Total turn off. The first date is a getting to know thing, and I won't have some quasi stranger feel me up. On the other hand, I've been on two fun dates with a young man who has not even kissed me on the mouth yet, even though he has told me several times that he is very attracted to me. He just wants to take things slow. He' s in his 20s and I guess not all of them are looking for older women for sex.
 antirepublican
Joined: 12/31/2014
Msg: 387
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 2/4/2015 11:13:49 AM
OP, Are you really, really sure that you have that active a libido? At 63? Some men your age do have active libidos but most are just programmed to proceed that way. They think to themselves, "Hey I'm a man. That means I'm a feral dog out to hump any leg that I brush against." If these men ever do get their sex charged woman, they soon regret it. After a couple of weeks of bottomless sex, they start to yearn for beer and The Golf Channel. It's a hidden injury of entrenched feminism that effects your generation more than any other. You have endured 50 years of propaganda telling you that you are absolutely required to act a certain way so that women can blame you for it.

Even if you did have that kind of libido, what would be the point? Sexually active women at that age are beyond being shy and demure about it. They will make themselves known PDQ.
 bluemoon24_7
Joined: 4/18/2014
Msg: 388
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 2/4/2015 12:01:03 PM
Hmmm, a lot of assumptions and just plain made up shyt on here. And I think the OP has a valid question for both genders. I would like to know the sexual attitude and capabilities of a potential partner and I think he has a right to know the same about me. Why not ask. I wouldn't be asking on the second date between the salad and main course....but I do want to know.

Even my 84 year old father told me "it still works"....that as way, way more information than I wanted to know but...I did think "rock on Dad". I want to be on the same page as my partner, for example, if I like sex three times a week and he is an every second Saturday right after football (if his team wins) kind of guy...it ain't going to work and I'd rather find out sooner than later.

Adults should be able to have an open conversation about sex (at the right time). If you can't...geez, I feel sorry for you.
 CrookCatcher
Joined: 7/14/2014
Msg: 389
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 2/4/2015 12:20:38 PM

A 20 year old man is ready to go several times within an hour


You've may of been a little premature with that statement.....
 calguy14
Joined: 8/17/2014
Msg: 390
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 2/4/2015 3:21:06 PM
^^^^
@crookcatcher
Apparently one of them had to call home when he got to her place. :)
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 391
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 2/4/2015 4:44:39 PM

On the other hand, I've been on two fun dates with a young man who has not even kissed me on the mouth yet, even though he has told me several times that he is very attracted to me. He just wants to take things slow


More than likely just trying to get the picture of having yum yums with his Mommy out of his head. It will probably take more than hour for it to go away though. Orrrrrrr, he's trying to figure out how to get the first kiss of his lifetime. He wants to make it a memorable one, so probably still practising on his pillow.
 ChicagoNKentucky
Joined: 5/27/2014
Msg: 392
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 7/20/2015 9:50:25 PM
Exactly! if you are insensitive enough to email/text/or have this type of conversation over the phone you only deserve to get laid by your hand. This is a delicate area for women. You should handle this with care and with the utmost respect in a non pushy way in a very neutral area.
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 393
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Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 7/23/2015 7:10:47 AM
Thank you, Careful me. Well said. We can do without the d---k photos, too.
 shadowwaker
Joined: 2/20/2012
Msg: 394
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 9/19/2015 9:27:24 AM
Wow! What is this misunderstanding people have that women (at a certain age) drop off the sexual desire radar? I think maybe it comes from 1. People that aren't attracted to a specific man (so he believes all women over "x" amount of years is no longer interested in sex period), or 2. Couples that have been married for years and just generally are sexually bored with each other. At 53, I am more interested in sex than EVER, but no - and thank you -I do NOT want it on my first date (or probably not even my fifth). I require that I be genuinely attracted to someone, and that (for me) requires an intellectual connection as well as physical chemistry. Not looks, not financial resources, not ANY factor seems to make a difference; but if those two elements aren't there - yeah - it's a n go. So; rather than become discouraged, just move on. You will eventually find that woman that it works with. As far as approach, I think it is easy enough to discuss under the context of "theory" in conversation, to get a feel for her needs and desires. But;if you are just talking about "putting the moves on her" you are taking the chance at rejection. If you really like the lady, and you really want to continue seeing her, I suggest asking her what her thoughts and views are.
 shadowwaker
Joined: 2/20/2012
Msg: 395
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 9/19/2015 9:31:46 AM
Smarts and Hearts is dead on on this one!
 PassionateSunnyGal
Joined: 7/23/2015
Msg: 396
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 9/19/2015 9:21:59 PM
Let's Marvin Gaye and get it on!
 SLAFFA
Joined: 8/13/2007
Msg: 397
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 9/19/2015 10:27:54 PM
Part of the "beauty" of OLD is that we all have the CHOICE to spell out "important stuff" right in our profiles. Men or women who actually ARE looking for a LTR, do/will actually READ profiles contrary to popular opinion. At least the serious ones in my experience.

If folks are not sharp enough to read and comprehend a profile, their chances of finding a LTR partner [using OLD] are extremely slim and none IMO.
 sealady111
Joined: 5/31/2015
Msg: 398
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 9/20/2015 12:44:04 AM
Shadowwaker......

That dress is beautiful and in it you look stunning.

I could not message you privately because of your email restrictions.

Well, well done and I wish I could look that good.
 MaleFeasance
Joined: 3/13/2015
Msg: 399
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 9/20/2015 3:02:03 AM
Wow! What is this misunderstanding people have that women (at a certain age) drop off the sexual desire radar?
----------
I'm not sure that there's any general misunderstanding about women of a certain age dropping off the sexual radar. However, from my perspective , by the time any woman reaches a certain age, if she really does like sex as much as she thinks she does, I expect her to be able to figure out whether or not she wants to sleep with someone well before five dates and not have it cause a great deal of angst.

----------
You will eventually find that woman that it works with.
----------
If I'm ever single again, I'm pretty satisfied that what works after getting a conversation started is pretty simple and not nearly as filled with pitfalls as you make it seem. If anything, the biggest pitfall for guys who aren't just evolutionary failures in the intellectual department is being too afraid of saying the wrong thing.
 deetristate
Joined: 12/4/2014
Msg: 400
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 9/28/2015 3:50:57 AM
seems to me that you are basically saying that you don't want to find yourself in a committed relationship with a woman who will have no real interest in the physical... EVER. (I have male friends who married women like that. Most are sticking with them anyway).

Don't date just one woman until you are in a commitment. After a few months of dating more than one, it should become obvious, But based on the above, the woman that you will want to commit to will not get physically involved until a couple of months of dating. But you should be able to tell whether she is interested before then.

Don't get physical with her unless you will make a commitment to her. Then you are in a relationship and won't have to go through the whole thing every other month.
 professora
Joined: 7/28/2008
Msg: 401
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Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 9/28/2015 7:31:31 PM
I am female and wonder how to tell if a man is interested?

I had one plutonic relationship---I thought he was a regular but proper sort of fella. A month into our dating I asked him ever so delicately about his interest in being intimate.

QUIET----

Nice looking, affectionate, great conversations.

About seven days later, he wanted out of our friendship.
 Peppermint_Petunias
Joined: 3/30/2012
Msg: 402
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Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 9/29/2015 2:51:25 AM
Body language
Does she touch you?Lean in to you?
Facial flirts, the way she looks at you.
As said it should be obvious if shes interested but don't expect her to act sexual towards you on the first couple of dates.

I personally dont want questions of any kind first 2 dates and watch how you say things.
I dont want you to come across as interested in sex only.

the only thing with "older women" imo, a lot of us are not just looking for sex.
Some are ,so dont get me wrong.
Better to assume she isnt than being to forward to soon and running her off.
 sealady111
Joined: 5/31/2015
Msg: 403
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 9/29/2015 4:25:40 AM
Professora - message 433 - I have just gone through exactly that.
Not all men want intimacy.
I have met a few absolutely lovely men, enjoyed their company and when I suggested intimacy they vanish fairly shortly afterwards.
A great way to destroy a friendship.

I have found out that for some they suffered from erectile difficulties so they considered normal intimacy was impossible.
Such a shame.



Others want only sex with as many women as possible as soon as possible.
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 404
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 9/29/2015 4:46:37 AM
Whenever I approach a woman, no matter her age, for some yum yums, it seems it's always from behind.

I may have a problem.


Or not.
 Olivoil
Joined: 5/3/2015
Msg: 405
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 9/29/2015 6:28:50 AM
In my circle there are quite a few single, well preserved, super cute ladies in their 50's.
Men like to be in our company, but seem to have a fear or reluctance to take it to the intimate stage.

One of these friends had a 5th date with someone our age, and his comment was "well, I guess we should get this over with". That sure cooked the fun out of it, and I'm not sure if they did or didn't "get it over with".

And sure, there are those who have had a lot of no strings sex in their lifetimes, and think that's the way everyone behaves.

They are frighteningly uninhibited and will tell you all about the time they had a threesome with a woman and her husband...on your first meet.

Petunias, I say, let them talk...the more info you give about how they should behave, the less we have to go on. :)

 Kathleen_Hiker
Joined: 9/25/2015
Msg: 406
Approaching the subject of sex with older women
Posted: 9/29/2015 4:49:48 PM
At age 62, sex is much better for me than it was in my 20s.
I'm more responsive, patient and exquisitely aware of sensations.
I no longer feel rushed.
Yum.
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