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 Joel246
Joined: 3/23/2008
Msg: 37
Women faking orgasmPage 4 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
THANK YOU, mysteriosa! I'm really discouraged by how many women think this is no big deal or are even proud of their ability to pull one over their partner. It's really demeaning and dishonest. I understand there are ego pressures but if you're willing to take the risk of entering into any relationships you have to understand there will be some difficult conversations.
 Joel246
Joined: 3/23/2008
Msg: 38
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 2/6/2010 11:46:59 PM

Not sure it would be better for a guy to think he sucks in bed,even if it isn't totally his fault,or that nothing he will ever do will get her there.Do you? Would YOU stay with a woman you knew couldn't come with you no matter what you did?Doubt it.


Maybe nothing he could do would get her there, but by telling someone you're not orgasming you can begin the conversation that will lead to better sex, even if it that means breaking out the vibrator more often than not. By faking you guarantee there will never be improvement and the sex will be even worse because you'll feel awkward about having to fake.


True...but it's also demeaning for a man to face facts sometimes too.Most people considering lying to be protecting someones feelings from the truth.It's not so much malicious because if a woman wanted to make a man feel badly she could simply tell him he doesn't do it for her,and never will.I think you are missing the point in faking it for some.They don't want to hurt a man's ego/feelings or make herself look as though she has some sort of problem in not orgasming.It's two fold.


I do believe that there are situations where it's not malicious, I was just bothered by how many women were proud of their ability to fake, which suggested particularly demeaning situations, not innocent white lies.

That said, if a guy is doing something wrong, he has to learn at some point! I believe people more often tell white lies because they're afraid to be upfront than because they're trying to protect someone's feelings. In most cases if you're upfront, the guy will be initially hurt but grateful as the conversation opens up on how he can please you better. And if his ego is too big to do that, then he's not worth your time anyways.


True again....but some men would simply dump a woman for her honesty.Make her feel badly for her inability to come with him,and consider herself "inept" for not being able to with a partner.'Specific Techinique' isn't enough of a reason for some men to get past the fact that they aren't really all that nessecary when it comes to a woman's orgasm.


If they dump you for that, let them, you're better off without them. If they bully or demean you for it, same. In a good relationship being honest and open in the bedroom is the only way towards good sex imo. Sure, sometimes we just click with partners and get each other off in the right ways, but in most cases there is a learning curve. If you're not willing to teach I don't believe you've any right to complain when the results aren't satisfactory. Remember you've had a lifetime with your body compared to your partner. I know no girl will ever be able to do certain things for me as well as I can do them myself, but that doesn't mean I prefer to do them alone or will deny her the knowledge of how to improve.

Anyways, I'm not interested in the gender debate. I'm not in any way saying women are more deceptive than men or whatever. I was just saying I was surprised and bothered by how many women in this thread were proud of their ability to fake an orgasm. I'm not trying to say women are worse for this.

Finally, I do mostly understand there's a lot of pressure on women to orgasm. Since it's so easy for men to orgasm, we expect women to be able to too, attach too much pride to giving orgasms, and ultimately add a lot of pressure to a situation that requires understanding, a comfortable environment and communication. This can be a tough thing for both sides to broach. Maybe when you're on a one night stand and have no long term interest in the person, it's easier to just fake by and move on. But if you're going into a serious relationship with someone you care about, being honest in the bedroom is the only way to go.
 windloverr
Joined: 2/29/2008
Msg: 39
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Women faking orgasm
Posted: 2/7/2010 10:20:46 AM

nothing sweet about meI'd fake it every single time with someone who was counting, I'd fake it with someone who was trying to figure out how to make me have more and more, but then I doubt I'd have more than one experience with someone like that....Honestly, I've faked it to get something over with when it's just not going as I'd hope as it's rude to just get up and leave halfway through. I've never been "caught"....More interestingly, I have tried to hide the fact that I am cumming, that was a much more interesting game.
What a deceitful lover.
My orgasm belongs to me, I'll have them when I want and how I want.
Then you should go someplace alone and have it. Why bother with the company/presence of a lover, if you're not interested in their input; and far more interested in deceiving them of any true or significant input from you. Sounds truly sad to me.
 KittenCatt
Joined: 6/11/2011
Msg: 40
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 8/21/2011 9:42:08 PM
This is one of the creepiest, grossest threads....I'd rather be waterboarded than spend time with someone so weird and insecure that they need to secretly "count" what I'm doing during sex.....ick, blech, barf.
 Bladesmith81801
Joined: 10/30/2010
Msg: 41
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 8/25/2011 6:33:35 PM
One of my exes was so bad I was the one that faked orgasms.
 missraven1
Joined: 8/12/2011
Msg: 42
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 8/25/2011 7:36:16 PM
Seems to me to have to fake it means a woman is either too desperate to please her lover and/or is too weak-willed to express the truth therefore cheating herself out of her own enjoyment. Have to shake my head at that. No wonder we're left with males out there who must think every woman they have straightforward penetrative sex with gets off so it comes as a revelation to them to request manual stimulation (for example) so YOU also get to the state of bliss he's at. Being honest about it favours everyone (including future lovers) as it can only improve a man's skill as a lover not to mention make him less selfish!
 PurpleFusias
Joined: 8/16/2011
Msg: 43
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 8/25/2011 9:41:13 PM
I'm pretty sure I'm inccapable of orgasming so I've become quite the expert at faking. And no, it's not the guy that's doing something wrong....trust me. I enjoy sex...a lot...but I don't get that "wave of euphoria" or whatever's supposed to happen. Sucks but oh well haha.

O have this same problem, I love sex, even joke that I'm addicted to it, but I don't feel a "wave of euphoria" I've become quite wet and have lost myself in sex and I definitely enjoy it, but I don't really know what I'm missing out on there, so.....
 Simon4567
Joined: 10/9/2010
Msg: 44
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 8/25/2011 11:07:20 PM
one way to know if she is faking an orgasm is when she is all monotone and unexcited. instead of looking at you, she has her face buried in a cosmo mag. this is foolproof!
 arwen52
Joined: 3/13/2008
Msg: 45
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Women faking orgasm
Posted: 8/26/2011 8:38:12 PM

Ladies, have you ever had a lover you COULD NOT fake an orgasm with?


Since I can say with all honesty that I've never faked an orgasm, I have no idea whether I would pull that off.

But why would I want to?
 PRSweetie70
Joined: 8/4/2011
Msg: 46
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 8/27/2011 8:52:16 PM
I take anxiety medication that affects my ability to have an orgasm. I can do it, myself, but not with penetration or oral. I fake it. I don't want the guy to feel bad about it.

 poker_fan_in_nyc
Joined: 4/6/2007
Msg: 47
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 8/28/2011 4:30:08 AM
My body reacts differently when I have an orgasm (to all types) that he is very much aware of...not sure how it could be faked unless the guy really is not aware and doesn't know what he was doing...
 manda-17
Joined: 8/12/2011
Msg: 48
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 8/28/2011 1:43:53 PM
with my ex... i prob wouldnt ever be able to fake an orgasm.. weve been havign sex for like 4 years. he knows me too well

other guys b4 him yea ive faked it
 tevenames
Joined: 9/13/2010
Msg: 49
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 8/28/2011 6:25:06 PM
Don't do it, we shall try again soon!
 Pasionlatina529
Joined: 8/5/2011
Msg: 50
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 8/28/2011 7:10:55 PM
smh... i fake nothimg
 bobbijo35
Joined: 7/4/2009
Msg: 51
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Women faking orgasm
Posted: 8/29/2011 8:49:22 PM
have you ever watched the movie the dirty truth? he says to fake because your not the only person in the room=)
 matchlight
Joined: 1/31/2009
Msg: 52
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Women faking orgasm
Posted: 8/29/2011 11:55:29 PM
I read that quite a few women do fake orgasms, but it seems bizarre to me. And a complete turnoff, because it makes what you're doing into a performance--and probably not a very convincing one. Instead of being lost in the feeling, you're thinking about it. It's hard for me to imagine that a guy would like his partner to put on an act.

There's going to be a misfire now and then, for both of you, so why pretend otherwise? It's not a big deal, and you should both be able to shrug and laugh about it. When you do that, rather than worrying about how you're doing, you take the pressure off. And that makes it more likely things will click the next time.
 complete_moron
Joined: 6/4/2011
Msg: 53
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 9/22/2011 4:10:44 PM
you're wrong there... there are a lot of guys out there (i assume, since i am one) that don't really 'enjoy themselves' unless they can completely satisfy their mate..


Bingo.
If I can't after several tries, then I will be in the process of start to break the relationship, because if things don't work out in the bed, there is hardly any hope that other things will work out and of course she wants someone who want to get her off and there is a good chance of cheating to happen later.



I don't believe that there is a man who can tell definitely that a woman did or did not have an orgasm. So to answer the question, no. Although, a friend of mine told me that she did have a male lover who could tell if she was faking or not. But I wasn't present at the time, so I have no idea what her performance was like. And I also have a male friend who told me he faked orgasm with women a few times, and the women didn't notice.


There are many guys who notice the faking going on, but they won't talk about it. Just because they don't say it, it doesn't mean they didn't realize it that she was faking it, but because of embarrassment or trying to find out why he can't get her off start to make him feel uncomfortable and start searching the reasons what he is doing wrong.
But again, just because he won't talk about it, it doesn't mean he didn't notice that she was faking it. He think he is the problem and he starts to blame himself for it, eventually it leads to a break-up.
So, to all the women who fakes it, just because your hubby seemed like he didn't notice and didn't mention it, it doesn't mean he didn't notice. No you didn't convince him. Watch for signs of being disappointed of himself but for no clear reason, he is probably thinking about "the last night" or the night before.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 54
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 9/22/2011 5:23:45 PM

What I don't get is - why do women who have never had an orgasm think they can fake them?

Maybe they watch the same porn the guys they are sleeping with watch.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 55
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 9/22/2011 5:35:31 PM

Maybe they watch the same porn the guys they are sleeping with watch.


You kidding me? They don't know what porn is. They watched when Sally met Harry.

They pulled a Meg Ryan.


Heheheh
 carolann0308
Joined: 12/9/2006
Msg: 56
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Women faking orgasm
Posted: 9/22/2011 7:51:34 PM
Yeah, that scene scared quite a few of the men I know. LOL They were all so****ure of themselves before......no pun intended of course.
 --Zen--
Joined: 6/29/2011
Msg: 57
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 9/23/2011 9:56:52 AM
Orgasm it self is defined as neuromuscular euphoria. There are muscle contractions during orgasm and it is detectable. Easiest way is to ask her to squeeze her kegels during foreplay while having your digit(s) in her. This way you can gage the strength.
If a woman even try to fake it with me it's a BIG strike against her. Do not LIE to me. I literally kicked a woman out of bed for that.
 sifia
Joined: 9/14/2011
Msg: 58
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Women faking orgasm
Posted: 9/24/2011 9:52:46 AM
LoL..and woman cant fake an entire relationship?..wow. niaeve you is.
 Pomose
Joined: 5/21/2011
Msg: 59
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 10/2/2011 4:25:47 PM
Have to comment on this one, and speak on my own experience, I can tell when a woman orgasms the muscles inside tighten and then she splashes and it feels great. Needless to say I usually explode very shortly after. On the other hand I faked one once but with good reason. It was July 4th weekend in my younger days, my friends and I were all at the park having a few beers and someone brings a football out and you mix football and beer and all caution gets thrown to the wind (Boys will be boys) and we loved every minute of it. Well later on that night and after the alcohol wares off I realize I have a broken finger and a couple bruised ribs "Oh well no regrets, goes with the territory" and my girlfriend at the time wanted to have sex that night, I just wanted to sleep and recover, but I did anyway and I faked it cause I was pretty sore, and just wanted to go to sleep.
 dd3va
Joined: 11/18/2008
Msg: 60
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Women faking orgasm
Posted: 10/2/2011 5:03:09 PM
OMG mikkie_maus, so true but lets' face it, so can women, probably even more deviously.
 poker_fan_in_nyc
Joined: 4/6/2007
Msg: 61
Women faking orgasm
Posted: 10/2/2011 6:13:02 PM

...I can tell when a woman orgasms the muscles inside tighten and then she splashes and it feels great


...we sure do
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