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 Helen0426
Joined: 6/2/2009
Msg: 39
at what point is it ok to ask if he is seeing/sleeping with anyone else?Page 3 of 3    (1, 2, 3)

ok, I've got the message, should have asked prior. As, I said, haven't dated in over 25 years. My POF bf and I had been seeing each other for sometime before becoming intimate, so I guess I just figured there wasn't anyone else. I know I'm naieve . I will certainly have that discussion the next time we meet. Thanks for the advice.

Sounds good. Since the "beforehand" ship has sailed, now is fine! This is definitely information to which you are fully entitled, so, nothing to be nervous about. Also, IMO you're more likely than not to find that his thinking is much the same as yours on this. Though "players" are notorious, they are also very much in the minority, especially past around age 40-45 or so, and in places other than Los Angeles.

Hope it goes well!
 bikeman1467
Joined: 9/22/2009
Msg: 40
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at what point is it ok to ask if he is seeing/sleeping with anyone else?
Posted: 2/7/2010 2:57:27 PM
at what point is it ok to ask if he is seeing/sleeping with anyone else?
I say at the point he is reaching to remove your panties. It's a fair question to ask when about to become physically intimate with someone.

Is it ok to ask, I don't want to scare him away.
Always treat yourself as #1; don't do something with someone if you are uncomfortable doing so.

Good luck with this dude!

My POF bf and I had been seeing each other for sometime before becoming intimate, so I guess I just figured there wasn't anyone else.
Never assume exclusivity until you have had "the talk".
 carmensimone
Joined: 6/24/2009
Msg: 41
at what point is it ok to ask if he is seeing/sleeping with anyone else?
Posted: 2/7/2010 5:29:19 PM
Wow this is heavy! I would think you would be a wise woman by now. Why would you sleep with a man after 2 months? He had nothing to work for, did he prove himself at all worthy of your body? This website is full of wolves...all ages lady. Never and I mean Never give your body away so fast!!! You should be telling me this....... I understand your out the loop but morals will stay the same past, and present. If you were feeling horny because it has been 5 years or more...we'll YA KNOW....(do ya thang by ya self) Also always ask the man ahead of time about his sex life. He might be bangin a few ladies on this site... (I'm just sayin) If he runs away from you for wanting to have to sex talk, well then let him run! Tell that fool c/ya don't let the door hit cha where the good lord split cha! And walk away with your head held high your BEAUTIFUL!!!

FYI Bangin is another word for ....gettin yo groove on in the bedroom
 thegirl123
Joined: 7/16/2009
Msg: 42
at what point is it ok to ask if he is seeing/sleeping with anyone else?
Posted: 2/15/2010 7:50:59 PM
I will tell you I have been in your situation. So infactuated with this guy that I would do anything in order to not scare him away.

Let me tell you what I have learned in my experience----anyone you are afraid of scaring away is not worth your time. You need to be real with yourself and decide what YOU want. You obviously want a relationship and are hanging on to some guy who is slow to profess that you are his.

Well for guys that are slow to profess their commitment to you-----see you later...because really look at tyourself, have some self respect and dont settle for less then what you actually deserve.
 rockin-trucker82
Joined: 1/4/2014
Msg: 43
at what point is it ok to ask if he is seeing/sleeping with anyone else?
Posted: 9/9/2014 10:45:52 AM
It's OK whenever you feel that it's a good time. What is with all these arbitrary rules today?

If you're going to date someone, there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with wanting to know if they're dating anyone else at the time. It's actually a good idea so that you can really judge how much emotional investment you're willing to put into it. If the other person is dating 5 other people, you know to go into it with the big chance that they're not ending up with you, so you know to be more careful, while if they're dating only you, you know it's safer to have a little more serious of an approach.
 hemingway114
Joined: 6/16/2014
Msg: 44
at what point is it ok to ask if he is seeing/sleeping with anyone else?
Posted: 9/9/2014 11:34:17 AM
I know it's an old post, but congratulations to the OP being in love.

Waiting six months for sex is not going to do anything - the so-called relationship experts who are giving that advice are pulling it out of their hat. Besides, some religious folks wait for marriage.

What you really want to know is, does he have integrity? People with integrity who are in love are naturally monogamous. And it only takes two months to fall in love. Guys fall a week sooner - guys are easy!
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