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 BchBumDad
Joined: 7/12/2005
Msg: 7
are family law courts sexistPage 2 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
The courts are changing... I have custody of my boys because the courts ruled that after all the evedince that I was the more fit parent...... Most of my guy friends either have custody of at the least 50/50 joint custody...
 dontbanurse
Joined: 7/14/2005
Msg: 9
are family law courts sexist
Posted: 7/14/2005 6:28:22 PM
I think that it is wonderful that the courts are recognizing that fathers can be as nurturing as women have been steryotyped to be in the past. I also think it ironic that in this male oriented world the one area that is matriarchal in nature is now under attack by men!
I don't condone sexism at any level none the less. Therefore I must recognize the prejudice.
 wekaholic
Joined: 1/16/2005
Msg: 17
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are family law courts sexist
Posted: 7/15/2005 12:23:55 AM
Bambi! --> Thanx for sharing with us the source of your mal content!

I think you were totally off base by telling others to 'stop being bitter'm especially when thier plea is for equality!

Whether you've used it or not, plan and simple, it is still a HUGE political issue when determining to remove a child from a mothers custody. This places mothers in a substaintial head-start when you're talking about the 'proof' judges look for.

I am truely sorry that you get no child support. That is disgusting behavoir from any parent who's in a position to enchance thier childs life.

I hope you wrote more 'in the moment' otherwise I have strong objections to your phrase "was nice enough to allow him to share ..." . You're moment was when you became pregnant by this man and decided to keep the child. It should have nothing to do with how "nice" you are or aren't. You child had a father and the RIGHT to a relationship with him.

Bushrat!! --> lol ... sounds so simular:

I had been paying child support to my x for over 8 months before I began pressuring for a custody agreement. Before I could say 'boo', social services was on my ass for formal payment orders. I didn't mind as I had already decided that I wanted to contribute to my child however possible, but I GREATLY resented thier attitude with me. I didn't give them any reason to treat me as a dead beat dad, so I resent them doing it.

Ironically enough, I was out of town (in the us) on business for about 3 weeks just after 9-11 when social services had sent a final draft requesting my signature. Enclosed in the note was a deadline by which they will initial legal preceedings. By the day I return, it's 11pm on the day of the deadline. All offices are already closed. I leave 3 messages (1 for the specific social worker that was requesting my information, 1 for the leagal personel who was to initial the court proceedings against me, and 1 on thier 'general' messagebox. In ALL messages I state the same thing: That I was out of town and just getting in and seeing this mail and that I have GREAT news!! --> While I was out of town I recieved a significant promotion! As a result the financial dox they sent me were no longer accurate. I should be paying MORE!

Well !! LOL.

I hear back from nobody. I leave the same 3 messages on 7 !~~ YES 7 ~~ Different occasions. Nobody returns my calls.

I finally get served from a deputy late one eveing. I'm being sued for child support (Although I have consistently paid support, and I was at that time paying MORE than what they were suing me for!)

I tried once more to call and leave my messages.... and again noone returns them.

THE BEST PART :

When I arrive for court, before our case is called, the legal rep from the soical services office motions for me to step out of the court room with him. I do.
He proceeds to try to 'strong arm' me and tell me how the preceedings are going to go!
He tells me he will request from the courts full payment retroactive since the childs birth if I don't cooperate!!!

I LAUGHED IN HIS FACE!!!

I told him: Look you iddiot (opened my folder and show him all my photo-copied bank statements showing the support payment cheque's clearing, copies of the cancelled cheques). I told him I've had it being treated like a dead beat dad from a bunch of freaking iddiots and I was going to tell the judge this whole story just so he can see who's responsible for wasting his & the courts' time.

Needless to say, I am still paying support today, and wouldn't ever change that...... In the long run, I actually have more in my pocket now by being forced to some 'formula' rather than just paying what my good-nature does naturally (I still do, I just keep them toys at my house).

It's just a shame this process had so many iddiots in it.
 wekaholic
Joined: 1/16/2005
Msg: 24
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are family law courts sexist
Posted: 7/15/2005 10:17:56 AM
LMFAO !!!

Not to mention that she clearly agree's that courts are sexist then --> If all what makes the difference is your plumbing ... this is PERCISELY what being GENDER BIASED refers to!!

LOL.... Silly woman!
 K1D0
Joined: 7/7/2005
Msg: 28
are family law courts sexist
Posted: 7/15/2005 1:39:13 PM
omfg yopur all dumb the reason the curts give every thing to the mother is the fact the baby bonds with the mother faster and well who the hell doesn't want there mommy come on get real people but all and all the curt can suck a fat one and no one ever lives the high life becuse u have people that don't pay and wont pay they go to jail and u get shit so whos to blame there maybe its the mother for going after the man who hasn;t had a job in 12 years or what not lifes a **** plane and simple have a fycking beer and shut up
 KAT4EVR
Joined: 1/23/2005
Msg: 33
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are family law courts sexist
Posted: 7/15/2005 6:14:35 PM
Well, what a topic. I was working for a lawyer who got custody for a father of two lovely children. Their mother was a woman from Hell. He is disabled but a good , caring father with a family that is supportive of him and his wishes. The mother on the other hand took the kid's birthday money to buy an air conditioner for her among other things. The Court, and I happen to know the Judge (female) in its wisdom, gave custody to the father. So, those of you who think that just because women have been the ones to get custody in the past, only because of gender, had better start thinking differently. If you screw up and treat your children like so much property, the Court will not see it your way. The sole and I mean sole determining factor is the welfare and wellbeing of the children. so if you want to be a "deadbeat" it doesn't matter how you dress, whether in pants or a skirt, you will not be the guardian and protector of the kids. AND IT IS ABOUT TIME. So just be the best you can for your kids and they will love you for it. I know, I am a single mom who has been through a lot to keep my kids safe and secure. The last one is now 17 and pretty darn good, if I do say so. Her father, on the other hand, quit being "Dad" a long time ago, so sad for him. My father walked my other daughter down the aisle and I got to dance with her in the Mother/daughter dance at the reception. Not a dry eye in the place.
 wekaholic
Joined: 1/16/2005
Msg: 36
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are family law courts sexist
Posted: 7/15/2005 7:54:03 PM
Posterior_Headgarment


HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Sh*t... can't breath .... lol .....
 wekaholic
Joined: 1/16/2005
Msg: 39
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are family law courts sexist
Posted: 7/16/2005 12:39:23 AM
Last I checked it still took a contribution from a man as well to create a baby.
Without us, there too would be no life!

Stop preaching and at least take the time to think about what you are typing!
 Zbeta
Joined: 7/3/2005
Msg: 61
are family law courts sexist
Posted: 7/17/2005 9:31:49 PM
I have my children and have spent my fair share of time in the court system.

In my opinion, it is not the courts that are sexist, but the judges through their political alliances. If you are a man do not see a lawyer who is a member of the ****** party and if a judge from that party is ruling when you are in chambers, have it adjourned if possible.

Good luck to all and remember in most cases the kids are better off with Mom, and a judge is always making a safe decision siding with Mom. Its kind of like a CEO choosing Microsoft over Linux.
 wekaholic
Joined: 1/16/2005
Msg: 71
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are family law courts sexist
Posted: 7/18/2005 7:21:52 PM
Posterier....

While I appreciate you logical responces and clearvoyant insights, I just hope you do this for your own enjoyment/entertainment and realize the old proverb at hand here with those you banter with --> You can lead a horse to water ......

Short of some devine intervention, I highly doubt the few you scuttle with will ever grown enough personally to see anything more than thier own perspective.

Now ... since I just read you posts......--> Thanx for all the keystrokes that I can't be bothered to waste the energey on !!!
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