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 AUTHOR
 myblueshadow
Joined: 11/11/2009
Msg: 16
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History
The Best Chance At Life......Page 2 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
People don't get blessed with a job! No one showed up at my door to tell me I won the job lottery. I worked hard to get the job I have. I have worked hard, make sacrifices and saved to get where I am.

Like it or not, children have material needs. Food, clothing, shelter, for example. Not to mention toys, activities. Amazing how children are so selfish that way!
 Notdesper8atall
Joined: 6/27/2008
Msg: 17
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 3/26/2010 2:06:30 PM
Well OP.. IMO I think that if you are responsible in both an emotional and a financial sense that is all you can really do when bringing a child into this world. They dont "need" the best of anything but your love and guidence, and money wont provide that. You dont have to buy the best in material things to be a good parent.

Most parents would love to be able to give their children better than we had as we grew up and sometimes we do..Other times we arent able to do so and know that in some cases "earning" something special is far more benficial a life lesson than simply handing them something. The only exception to this rule would be our love.

 SweetnessInFlorida
Joined: 6/26/2008
Msg: 18
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 3/29/2010 11:28:42 AM
In theory it sounds good.
But we all know reality can be a whole different ballgame.

We have all seen children of the rich and famous who turned out to be trainwrecks of a hot mess. Love and attention to your children really does make a difference.
Money does play a factor, you do need housing, a bed to sleep in, good food in your stomach, clothing, toys, transportation, utility bills, etc.
But money isnt everything.
I know people who make high salaries but cant manage a dime of it and are in debt beyond their eyes. I know people who do just fine on 10 bucks an hour.
I have had people who made way more mmoney than i did, and had no kids to feed ask me for loans.

When i had my first child i had no place of my own, no stable income, no savings, and was romping all over the world sowing my wild oats.
But i changed. I got a steady job, my own place, started saving money, and provided just fine for my daughter. In the beginning it weasnt easy, when she needed a special hypoallergenic formula that was expensive, i was scrubbing the toilets of my friends and family members to raise the cash for it.
I worked as a bartender then, some months i was raking in the dough and others i was shopping at the dollar tree. But i saved saved saved to get to a better place.

When i decided i wanted another child, i did it all "by the book", i had a husband, money, and stability, but my husband died, and i was once again a single mother.
It was easier financially being a single mother the second time around, as i had built up savings and investment and my husband had left us a huge chunk of change, but i had no emoitonal peace. The whole family was greiving. Sure we could pay the bills without worry but money could not buy the emotional peace and relief from the grief we all desperately needed.

I think as long as you can love and raise the child and can provide housing clothing and food, have a child if you want one.
 kissmyasthma
Joined: 12/4/2009
Msg: 19
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 3/29/2010 4:19:47 PM
I think as long as you can love and raise the child and can provide housing clothing and food, have a child if you want one. --- sweetness

I'm down with this as long as you only drag a willing man into that choice and not because the law says he doesn't get a say in an otherwise selfish decision.

Every time I see a statement like sweetness's it just proves that men are being subjected to an unfair result of recreational sex. You can't have it both ways.
 SweetnessInFlorida
Joined: 6/26/2008
Msg: 20
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 3/29/2010 5:07:04 PM
I wasnt telling women to drag men into paternity, and last time i checked forcing a man to bust a nut wasnt very possible unless he WANTED to, but whatever.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 21
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 3/31/2010 7:55:46 AM
Yes she is right. So we should institute the laws that they had in China where you are only allow one child per household. And since in China they all want boys, the moment they found out that the child was a girl, they had an illegal abortion. Also, look at all those third world countries with poverty and malnutrition. So why don't we put something in the water that completely sterilized all the people that live in a given slum, and only the people that have a college degree, and proof of income are allow to then have children. Let's do that in the US, Canada and all the industrialized countries. Actually most industrialized countries are in a minus demographic growth, particularly in countries like Germany, Spain, Sweden. But since the US behaves more like a third world country in this area, maybe we can institute laws to prevent this. Why not even legislate the amount of sex that couples can have and even have vouchers based of proof of income or even your credit rating.

Yeah right.



 SweetnessInFlorida
Joined: 6/26/2008
Msg: 22
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 3/31/2010 10:06:13 AM
^^^ Put the bong down honey.
 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 23
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 3/31/2010 6:15:49 PM

I Hope for the Best For All.


Well, I certainly hope the best for you, man.

Do you foam at the mouth when you write this shit? I'd suggest getting back on the meds and maybe hooking up with a new therapist, or at least take a course in writing so you could make your rantings a bit more coherent and accessible to us boneheads.

On Topic:

As others have said, waiting for the perfect time to spawn is tough for most, but I really believe that far too many people don't even stop to THINK about what bringing a kid into the world REALLY entails.

I know I didn't, but I DID have a number of things in place that provided at least the potential of being a successful parent. Simple things like: a really good, marketable education, solid family support, a good job, a house, a lot of life experience....

... not to mention that I'm one sexy motherfvcker so I could choose the best looking chick to mix my chromosomes with.....

 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 24
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/1/2010 8:03:53 AM

so which point did you wish to challenge blaugh man..?

or were you foaming at the mouth that you feel now diminished by the plain ideas you are too confused to comprehend..?


Diminshed? By your ramblings?

Rather, I feel increased and happy I had an education which allows me to write coherently.

I learned a new word this morning. It fits your writing perfectly, as a matter of fact, because your writing is all hugger-mugger....

.... so if you ARE making any valid points, they are rather cryptic.

Cheers.

 forumrum
Joined: 5/25/2009
Msg: 25
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/1/2010 11:22:30 AM
From Msg#20 - "I think what we need is UNIVERSAL DAYCARE."

No we do not. I raised three children to adulthood and we paid for our own caregivers. I pay enough bloody taxes to go toward ridiculous things in this country. I work very hard and still have to sacrifice many things because I pay over 45% of what "I" earn to one level of government or another.

This is my money, not the governments and not yours. I earn it, not you. If you can't afford to care for your own kids, don't have them, or put them up for adoption. It is not my responsibility to pay for your children.
 forumrum
Joined: 5/25/2009
Msg: 26
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/1/2010 12:08:38 PM
exiledbyabusers,

I don't respond to mindless drivel. If you wish to have a discussion in english rather than what you might think is poetry or philosophy, please feel free to repost.
 forumrum
Joined: 5/25/2009
Msg: 27
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/1/2010 12:15:39 PM
Jenn8131,

No I have never been unemployed and am currently self-employed so I am not eligible for EI. The so called pension that may wait for me when I retire is nothing that can support me. I have paid into it since I was 12, so no other taxpayers have not funded that useless pension called CPP.

I will not pay for universal daycare or any other social program that takes personal responsibility away from those whose responsibility it should be. If forced to I will leave this country and also take the jobs that I created with me. Enough is enough. As I said, it is my money, not yours. I'm sorry if you feel that is harsh but everyday I see the abusers of the system with their fake injuries or illnesses, sitting on their asses all day playing on the computer while they collect cheques from various levels of government. We pay too much for too little.

Our health care and school systems are in trouble because they are bottomless holes with no accountability for the way funds are spent. Why does health care account for 46% (and counting) of Ontario's budget? Waste through lousy administration that's why.

My children worked through school and I paid my share for each.

I have no pension. I will have to work well past 70 in order to be able to retire if I live that long. I'm sorry, your needs don't even enter my mind for consideration.
 late™
Joined: 2/1/2010
Msg: 28
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/1/2010 12:29:22 PM

The Best Chance At Life......

Having parents (or parent), who understand both the nature and nurture aspects of parenting and are capable of a reasoned understanding "why" some things work better than others; and that these things are dependent on circumstance and limiting factors.

so my question is...... is she right?

...ask yourself this, is she applying a blanket generality to an issue while not taking into consideration all possible facets of it?

And you'll have a definitive answer.
 kissmyasthma
Joined: 12/4/2009
Msg: 29
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/1/2010 3:16:50 PM
I am of the opinion that instead of having it all will be the best way at least have some ducks in a row before you venture into parenthood.
Far too often and even in my situation the gun gets jumped and many are scrambling after the fact to get their shiyte together.
It is painfully obvious that based on how many unweds are suddenly enrolled in school to get a better job after popping out a child that it is in fact a very important thing to do.

For all of those who claim that love is enough here in this thread are most likely fortunate to have a decent job or an education so making a statement like that from that position is way too easy.

I think it really isn't all that uncalled for any couple to realize that having a child is going to take a little sacrifice for three or four years until the kids hit school. How arrogant of anyone that it should be an expected thing to have subsidized childcare. All it takes is a little planning ahead and a willingness to put off a few vacations or unnecessary purchases.

No one said for you to have a child, it is a "choice" , is it not? Or are they all accidents?
 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 30
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/1/2010 4:38:10 PM

so then it is that you either have no points to challenge or all of it went over your head.

it is not surprizing to me sir. there are very few which had taken the time to accomplish for my writing the time i had put into all of it.

cryptic is a subjective interpretation sir, but that do not mean it be untrue or invalid.

good luck to you in your continued learning of the english language and perhaps one of these fine days, you may have a nice word of gratitude to share for those which you take from.


Dude, you're hilarious. Is English your first language? If it isn't, I can understand why your posts are all hugger-mugger. If English is your first language, somewhere along the line someone forgot to let you know that stringing words together hugger-mugger is not the best way to get a message across.....


I don't see people in Quebec complaining about their daycare system because its supports all families.


Jenn , darling, of course Quebec isn't complaining about anything. They get Guilt-Payments from Ottawa just as the Aboriginals do in Canada. It PAYS big-time to be a minority or female in Canada if you want to collect lots of other taxpayers' money.....

.... the best situation would be a Quebecoise, one-legged, aboriginal, divorced, lesbian mother...

... being a white male who has an education and a job? Ahhhh.... not so much....

(flames ON)

 freetime2bme
Joined: 1/16/2006
Msg: 31
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History
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/2/2010 5:04:38 AM
Q: How many people in this thread planned their children (every child) and predicted their split from their spouse when they brought their child into this world?
A: I can only speak for myself, but I planned every child with my ex wife before having them. Prenatal vitamins are best if started before the pregnancy and this is only possible with prior planning. Prior planning is a good thing. As to predicting the split from my ex, I had the brains to understand that marriages often times end in divorce. I therefore had a contingency plan for this. In addition to a pre-marital agreement, accounts and many assets were kept separated throughout our marriage. And although children are not specifically addressed in the premarital agreement, the way it was written and how assets were held, I at least knew I would have improved odds as a father of having at least partial custody of my children in the event of a split. As it worked out I did get full custody after the split, thanks in large part to this contingency planning. Not easy to do as a father.
"Marriage is not a commitment anymore" If you believe this, then you would be foolish not to plan all your children, have a premarital agreement and contingency plans in place for use if the marriage failed as some many of them do. That is if your smarter then the average person out there, but as can be seen in the forums there are lots of people that are not that bright. If you go the unwed rout you should not look to the state to help you.
 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 32
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/8/2010 4:57:37 PM

americans pay canadian children by some reciprocation the compensations for over 3 decades of child abuse by their medias (and our medias).


Dude, seriously, what the fvck does this mean in English? What the fvck language did your parents speak to you as an infant? Your syntax and usage is just so far off.

The closest I can come to understanding the way you try to the convey information is much the same way the schizophenics I've met/worked with over the years convey info. Seriously. The "secrets" you see in every corner, your user name, the conspiracies, your ramblings really make me think of someone with some serious mental health issues.

Participate, but PLEASE, try to use proper English and intelligible arguments. I'm not sure anyone has ever told you this tidbit, but it is contingent on the COMMUNICATOR to make sure that the message is clear so that the RECEIVER of the message understands the message. If the message doesn't get through, it's the COMMUNICATOR'S shortcoming, not the RECEIVER'S.

.... yikes.....

 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 33
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/12/2010 7:26:58 AM

Blaugh-man. If you have criticisms of my expressions contents, show them, and try to resist total non-acceptance of ideas which either seem foreign to you or seem to threaten your base political view-points.

Other-wise, I too have rights to speak and write and no secret identity may presume to over-rule 1st amendment or charter freedoms to do so.


I have absolutely NO problem with you expressing your opinions or telling it like you see it....

.... the problem is that none of your posts make any frickin' sense.

You MAY have many legitimate points to make, but somewhere between your brain/thought and the keyboard, things are getting REALLY messed up, dude. Your posts are incomprehensible and come off as paranoid roof-brain chatter.


And were you part of the troupe which had my question removed re: " re-educating the prejudicial of mind" i installed late last week..?


I have never voted to have a post deleted. In fact, whenever I see that some posters are voting to get a thread deleted, I ALWAYS vote to keep it, no matter WHAT the thread is about. I DID ask that a post be deleted one time because it was my own post and it was in the wrong thread.


Will you please identify yourself and show some credentials which give you rights or want to quash language..?


I speak English. I know how to string words together to make a sentence. I know how to make a sentence make sense.....

... and, last but by no means least, I'm one of the smartest men I've ever known...

On Topic:

I think people ought to have to obtain a license and pass a stringent screening process before having any kids...

.... kinda like you have to do before they'll let you have that cute little puppy from the SPCA....

 kissmyasthma
Joined: 12/4/2009
Msg: 34
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/12/2010 8:35:55 AM
Just to reiterate the post from the captain, you need to get your message across to your audience to which I am certain you know little about. I am of the opinion that the captain has a very strong grasp of the English language in that he is able to get points across with more than one edge to them whereas you are writing to a party of one - yourself.

To insult us because you are the only one who understands your gibberish is laughable. It is one thing to use big words that some need to look up the meaning to is one thing but even the best of us had to take a little time to decipher Shakespeare the first (or second ) time we read it and you sir are no Shakespeare. Although it isn't uncommon for prisoners and those committed to insane asylums to have access to the internet.
 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 35
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/12/2010 5:25:52 PM
well, given that my ideas be quite foreign to you then so would the sense criteria you would need to have your tests ratified, else create a racist screen to satisfy your special non-spoken/written agenda. perhaps that criterion serve economics. it won't be enough. i am a human rights and human relationships advisor.


Dude, you are a hoot.

First off, I wouldn't even know whether or not your ideas are foreign or not because I can't even decipher what the hell you are talking about. Please translate this into whatever language you choose, I'll have it translated: "... given that my ideas be (<<the subjunctive form? really? I thought I was the pirate here) quite foreign to you then so would the sense criteria (<<Explain what that is, please. A "sense criteria"?) you would need to have your tests ratified (My tests? Where the hell did that come from?)... else create a racist screen (<<Seriouly? Are you calling a racist because you make no sense? Yikes. I have no idea whether you are white, black, purple, green, Terran or Martian, nor do I care.) to satisfy your special non-spoken/written agenda (<<I have no agenda)."

I'd love to continue deconstructing your quirky, even bizarre, usage of English, I really would, but it gets a bit far off topic.

I really DO love it, though. I'm having a blast and haven't had this much fun since the pig ate my brother....

As for my qualifications, I hold two degrees. One of them is in English Literature. If you are "... human rights and human relationships advisor", good on ya, but I sure hope for you clients' sake that you don't speak like you write....


On topic:

I still think that people should have to achieve some sort of credential in order to breed. Maybe if everyone was to be installed with ON/OFF switch at birth this would reduce the number of kids born into a family with a long, multiple generational, history of dysfunction.

 anonymouslyme
Joined: 12/23/2008
Msg: 36
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/19/2010 2:25:00 PM

What is it with those which have been reared to believe you are superiour but with no proofs for showing your superiority..?
Perhaps the asker (aka fruitcake of english debauchery) would be best suited to provide answers to an inquiry such as this?
 EVROCKS
Joined: 1/22/2010
Msg: 37
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/25/2010 4:04:15 PM
Knowing what I know about the brain development of children and seeing what I see in my community, if I were a baby, I would prefer living in poverty with parents who realize the value of their time, attention, and communication with me on a daily basis. I would prefer an unemployed parent who could stay home with me instead of leaving me with someone who is doing "child care" just so she can stay home with her own kids. Money does not raise intelligent, healthy kids. Love and attention over time does.
 LoveBeautifulDays
Joined: 2/21/2013
Msg: 38
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/9/2013 8:56:41 PM
i am tripping out when I watch Feed The Children, why do they keep having babies when they know for sure that children will be in severe poverty??/
Are they being raped, or whats going on?
I wouldnt even want a man near me knowing I wasnt going to use protection or it wasnt available, when i have children in severe poverty or know that the baby that will be conceived will be. What is going on?
 Debyduz_
Joined: 5/4/2012
Msg: 39
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/13/2013 6:08:01 PM
I grew up with a stay at home mom and a dad who worked 2 jobs to support us. We did not have the best of everything. We went to public school. Wore hand me down clothes. We had one pair of shoes and wore them til they fell apart. I was strait A student and my siblings were average. My mom was a nut case and we would have been better off if she went to work and left the dog to babysit us.

She has a right to her opinion. As everyone does.

Money does not buy happiness. It does not guarantee a smart child.

Take one aspect, drug addiction. It happens to everyone. The best of families end up with druggies just as often as those who live in worst neighborhoods.

I think she is wrong. The great life people seem to have is often an illusion. The great job requires 90 hours a week. The great house requires both parents working.
 rockondon
Joined: 2/21/2007
Msg: 40
view profile
History
The Best Chance At Life......
Posted: 4/15/2013 7:04:36 PM

Long story short a few weeks ago a bunch of my friends got together, most of the girls there are mothers, well one of the girls that was there, who has no kids, voiced her opinion that she thinks that it is wrong for people who don’t have good jobs, a house, and a great life and that cant afford the best of the best, should bring children into this world..
Due to the fact that we have such a high poverty rate, and that every child should be given the utmost chance at life…

so my question is...... is she right?
I can see what drives people to think this way. I see a trend where those of lowest socioeconomic status are pumping out the most kids. As unfortunate as that might be, the claim that those who "can't afford the best of the best" should not bring children into this world - really? That's pretty extreme.
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