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Joined: 12/30/2008
Msg: 31
Post Divorce Last NamesPage 3 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
When my parents divorced, I asked my mom that very question. She said it was because she wanted people to know she was my mother and wanted us to have the same last name. I actually asked in my divorce to take my maiden name back but my lazy lawyer failed and I can't afford to go back to court over something as trivial so I just "go" by my maiden name but legally I still go by his...which is the same as my son's.
Joined: 9/19/2009
Msg: 32
Post Divorce Last Names
Posted: 8/30/2010 9:24:45 AM
This was interesting to read, especially about the part of "I can't stand/couldn't stand my maiden name."

Personally, if I ever walk the plank that is marriage, I'd suggest, or insist, that she keep her own name after we don each other's rings. It would seem to me that it helps her and I keep some of our personal identity by having the names we've always had. For example, my gf is from another country and culture and loves her name, from beginning to end. I wouldn't want her to change that for me or anyone else.

Just my opinion, maybe I favor the feminists or what ever, but the biggest thing that scares me (and my gf) about marriage is the lost sense of personal identity. Her name stays, my name stays, or marriage wouldn't take place.
 Frau Chilliknickers
Joined: 12/5/2008
Msg: 33
Post Divorce Last Names
Posted: 8/30/2010 7:26:17 PM
One of the first things I did when my divorce was finalised was change my name back to my maiden name. It was extremely important to have my own idenity back. IF I were to ever re-marry I would still keep my name..its who I am.
 Dare to
Joined: 2/11/2009
Msg: 34
Post Divorce Last Names
Posted: 9/1/2010 2:34:11 AM
I changed my name back to my maiden name about a week after i left the marriage. I knew i wasn't going back and i could see no reason to keep his name when i wasn't his wife anymore. My kids still have his name, they have no problem with me using mine and neither should they, after all it is MY name.... I was Mrs..... only when i was his wife....
 english lass
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 35
Post Divorce Last Names
Posted: 9/10/2010 3:11:27 PM
I really really wanted to change it back to my maiden name when we separated/divorced - wanted to have as little as possible of him in my life and would have done if it was just me who'd be affected, however, my kids have the same last name as my ex and for their sake I decided it'd be less confusing to keep *their* last name - that's how I got through the initial feelings of disgust at having to keep the name - considering it my childrens' rather than my ex's.
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