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 SweetnessInFlorida
Joined: 6/26/2008
Msg: 7
The incredibly childish other parent.Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)
Concrete shoes
 carolann0308
Joined: 12/9/2006
Msg: 8
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The incredibly childish other parent.
Posted: 4/26/2010 6:11:00 AM
So basically you've shot down or suddenly had an answer to every legitimate suggestion made. So the point of the thread is what? If she believes her children are in danger then she needs to either document everything and spend $$$ to have his rights ended or move in the middle of the night to keep them safe.
Because after your first post telling of his poor behavior you came back and said she is already doing the right things. Again, what was the point of the post?
 myblueshadow
Joined: 11/11/2009
Msg: 9
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The incredibly childish other parent.
Posted: 4/26/2010 7:05:44 AM
I said this in another thread, and I will say it again here. I always wonder what the other side of the story is.
 packagedealx3
Joined: 2/4/2006
Msg: 13
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The incredibly childish other parent.
Posted: 4/27/2010 9:36:35 AM
It's easy to say cut off all communication, etc. and go for supervised visitation. Your friend needs to weigh how this will make things better or worse for her girls. My ex is an emotionally and verbally abusive bipolar asshat but my children would rather have him in their lives the way he is (because at 55 he is not going to change) than not have him in their life. When he upsets them, I focus on what they need from me to get past it and not on the behavior and I have found that it no longer upsets me as much or makes me angry.

I'm always the kind of outside the box thinker. I think the one tactic your friend has not tried is getting to know any of these girlfriends. Sounds like they come and go but while they are there, they could be an excellent resource for your daughters to have more of a real relationship with their father. I picked up the phone and called my stepson's mother years ago because I thought it was ridiculous that (pre cell phones) she met my ex at a gas station that was closed to transfer the kid, so if he showed up he would just have to sit there until she showed.

She was astounded I was talking to her and that was about the last time she talked to him, dealing with me was more productive and less hassle. Next time he comes to pick up the girls with girlfriend along do you think all hell would break loose if she went out and introduced herself to the woman and opened up some communication that might continue? If he tries to act like a douche, he'll look stupid to the new girlfriend and they might just be able to normalize things at least as long as the girlfriend is around, i.e. you could communicate with girlfriend about the movie issue. If she speaks with your friend and finds out she is normal, she is just going to think he is beyond stupid so what choice would he have but to sign on for the things they work out together?
 carolann0308
Joined: 12/9/2006
Msg: 14
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The incredibly childish other parent.
Posted: 4/27/2010 9:41:17 AM
I think those are excellent suggestions Packagedeal, sometimes you not only have to be the more mature person but unfailingly polite to even those that look at your sideways. She is the one that will first and foremost set the example to her daughters as to how a mature, kind adult woman behaves.
 carolann0308
Joined: 12/9/2006
Msg: 16
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The incredibly childish other parent.
Posted: 5/3/2010 10:46:32 AM
I agree with Pixie, the average person does not give this much thought or emphasis on drama that does not include them If it was your daughter, sister or yourself that would be different. How a 'friend' deals with her loser Ex is not my concern.
 kissmyasthma
Joined: 12/4/2009
Msg: 19
The incredibly childish other parent.
Posted: 5/9/2010 12:07:11 PM
I beg to differ^^^^^^^. Sometimes the best advice you will ever get is from a friend but all too many times we choose not to heed it. Moreover too many "friends" choose to say nothing. A friend tells a friend when they have a booger in their nose.

Has I listened to my best friend I wouldn't be where I am now. He had said not to marry but went with my gut instead. Worst decision of my life.
 Tealwood
Joined: 12/16/2008
Msg: 22
The incredibly childish other parent.
Posted: 5/10/2010 5:31:57 AM
Well the guy does sound like trailer trash.



Birds of a feather flock together
 BoonDockSaint73
Joined: 3/29/2010
Msg: 24
The incredibly childish other parent.
Posted: 5/10/2010 6:45:12 AM
The best way to deal IMO with the other parent when it comes to visitation, etc is to follow the divorce decree to a "T"...especially when either parent has issues and is not a normal, mature parent...hence - they cannot be trusted.

but for some reason- OP, the way you write this story what really comes to the forefront is his "Piece de Jour" and his calling his ex wife a "whore"

you come across as the "wife" in this story and not actually a "friend"...

sounds like at some level the 2 of you are actually still in love with each other and never really were able to "deal" with the break up in the relationship...


both of yall need to grow up and either resolve your personal issues with each other, get back together...or at least go and get a room...
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