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Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > Finding a girl with the same sex drive?      Home login  
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 .dej
Joined: 11/6/2007
Msg: 51
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Finding a girl with the same sex drive?Page 3 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
Seriously, getting your d1ck wet daily isn't number 1 priority in a healthy marriage, or any kind of relationship.
 Apollodorus
Joined: 11/24/2009
Msg: 52
Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/8/2010 5:43:38 PM
bottomline is you should not neglect your partners needs ever and one of my needs is sex everyday, its not a difficult need and a loving person that cares about me would be willing do have sex everyday.
 .dej
Joined: 11/6/2007
Msg: 53
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Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/8/2010 5:46:55 PM
You shouldn't neglect anyone's needs any more than you have to. But just because you have a need doesn't shoot your little petty problems to immediate number one priority.

Life ain't all about you.
 wvwaterfall
Joined: 1/17/2007
Msg: 54
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Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/8/2010 6:59:13 PM

I do know what a committment means, a commitment is where you give 100% of what each other wants even if you don't want too and if one is slacking they are breaking there duty to fulfill 100% of there partners needs in the relationship and if it continues the relationship is over.


So....if what she wants is a break from sex for a day or two? A break from YOU for a few days to go visit her family, spend a weekend with the girls, etc? Ready to give your 100%? You've got a pretty simplistic view of commitment, in my view. I do hope you're quite clear with anyone you're contemplating committing to exactly what the term means to you and what you expect. Better to give her the chance to bail sooner than later.

Oh for the days when our last five forum posts were displayed on the bottom of our profiles. Mr "women are slacking if they don't cater to my every whim" would I'm sure be impressing his prospects then!

Dave
 Secondhand_Lion
Joined: 11/10/2008
Msg: 55
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Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/8/2010 7:01:20 PM
Get married son....that should cure your problem.............................................
 Apollodorus
Joined: 11/24/2009
Msg: 56
Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/8/2010 7:11:43 PM

I do hope you're quite clear with anyone you're contemplating committing to exactly what the term means to you and what you expect


I always tell my date what I expect from a relationship within the first couple weeks and that expectation hasn't stopped me from getting dates that actually deliver what I expect.


You shouldn't neglect anyone's needs any more than you have to. But just because you have a need doesn't shoot your little petty problems to immediate number one priority.

Life ain't all about you.


You are right. it is 100% about my date and 100% about me and if its not that way I am gone


Apollo, I take it you will be ok with your lady leaving as and when your sex drives change?


It is my duty to provide what my date needs even when I don't want too and it my dates duty to provide what I need.
 namrael
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 57
Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/9/2010 10:01:06 AM
OP: I have a very high sex drive, and I couldn't keep up with 20 times a week. If that's non-negotiable to you, I'd bring it up pretty early into the dating process. One ex-BF of mine did bring it up respectfully that he was more a once-a-day sex kind of person than once-a-week, and I was happy that he brought that up so we knew we were on the same page. If you're dating someone with a sex drive as high as yours, she'll probably be happy to hear it; if she isn't, chances are you wouldn't have been sexually compatible anyway.


It is my duty to provide what my date needs even when I don't want too and it my dates duty to provide what I need.


This is a somewhat frightening sentiment to me, and one of the ideas that leads to things like date rape. (Note that I'm not remotely accusing anyone of anything, just pointing out the pitfalls in this idea.)
 anunu
Joined: 10/21/2009
Msg: 58
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Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/9/2010 5:51:21 PM
20 times per week?!

If I had sex 20 times in one week, I wouldn't have time for anything else.
I don't do quickies, so the typical sex encounter is an hour or two.
Plus it is usually pretty rough so we both end up with quite a few war wounds in the end!

I just couldn't imagine doing this 20 times in a week!
 Ependa
Joined: 7/16/2009
Msg: 59
Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/9/2010 9:32:38 PM
20 times? wow , how do you have time to do anything else?? =) Unless you're talking 20 quickies. Just a little humor.
Finding someone with a similar sex drive is very important and you just need to talk about it. If you can't talk openly about it together, then you probably shouldn't be having sex anyway. I won't even consider dating a person with a low or medium sex drive. Friends only if that's the case =)
 no_1_bby
Joined: 5/3/2006
Msg: 60
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Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/10/2010 5:09:40 AM
*laughs at the ridiculous-ness of this thread and of certain responders*
 JerseyGirl2008
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 61
Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/10/2010 5:13:45 AM

Yes one of my last relationships, my SO had terminal cancer and we always worked around it and found sexual things we could do until one day my SO decided to use her illness as a crutch to avoid doing anything for me that I wanted, she just wanted me to cater to her, so I left.

God, how selfish of a dying woman not to put YOUR sexual needs first. Yup, her fear of eventually dying because she was terminal wasn't NEARLY as important as YOU getting off - right? How utterly pathetic.

I read your profile - and yes, I'm going to go there. You state you're in a wheelchair. I'm kind of surprised that you feel you can make all these sexual demands on a woman when I read posts from other guys who are in wheelchairs who can't even get women to TALK to them, much less be in a position to demand that they act like trained seals in the bedroom. Maybe you should take it down a couple of notches and realize the earth does NOT revolve around you.

I have the feeling that in time, you're going to discover that fact for yourself.
 Apollodorus
Joined: 11/24/2009
Msg: 62
Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/10/2010 5:58:38 AM

I'm kind of surprised that you feel you can make all these sexual demand


Just like you I have my minimum requirement for me to be happy in a relationship and one of my minimum requirements in a relationship in order for me to be content in that relationship. I do not just settle for someone that is not going to be satisfying to me, My SO is not gods gift to the world and my SO has to prove to me that they are worthy of being in a relationship with me.
 wvwaterfall
Joined: 1/17/2007
Msg: 63
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Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/10/2010 8:08:57 AM

my SO has to prove to me that they are worthy of being in a relationship with me.


And the sad thing is, somewhere out there is a low self esteem woman who will actually buy into this sort of nonsense. At least he's up front about what he demands.

Dave
 johndoe67-1
Joined: 4/13/2010
Msg: 64
Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/10/2010 8:15:40 AM

My SO is not gods gift to the world and my SO has to prove to me that they are worthy of being in a relationship with me

Exactly where did you get this arrogant, narcisstic ego!?!? Parents always want their kids to have self-confidence and self-esteem, but they must've done some job on you!

If you refuse to join us in the REAL WORLD, where people are different, have mood changes, other priorities, and yes, sometimes illnesses, then I think you better get used to years of right arm workouts.
 Cape Sunshine
Joined: 8/11/2009
Msg: 65
Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/10/2010 2:45:36 PM
Just call 1-800-nymphomaniac..... they'll help you out...
 namrael
Joined: 8/10/2008
Msg: 66
Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/11/2010 6:37:18 AM

If you think my comments are cruel so be it and no I am not just posting to rile a bunch of people up, I have my needs and for the most part I am not willing to bend any of them for anyone and for any reason. Someone who loves and cares for me will be understanding of that.


Doesn't that go both ways? If she needs to have more sleep/down time/time to work, shouldn't you, as someone who loves and cares for her, enable her to meet those needs by not requiring sex 20+ times per week? What if she's sick?

I do think it's worth figuring out what you do and don't require in a relationship, but it's also useful to remember you're dealing with fallible people, and things happen. Allowing for some leeway and compromise seems like a good idea all the way around, and is a lot of what being in a relationship is about.
 deerdog1
Joined: 12/29/2006
Msg: 67
Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/11/2010 8:20:09 AM
well I understand your problem ... but you need to work on your attitude .. like you I have been more highly sexed than every partner in my life ... and sometimes I have got on a pity trip also ... but most times i live in the real world ..I just accept what I can get ... and take care of the excess my self ... being a baby and demanding more sex always results in less sex .... being understanding will almost always result in more sex ...as well as not being called a jerk ....I try to make the sex I get the best it can be ... my wife knows I want it more than her and she will help me in many ways and still allows me to help myself without any grief ... careful it is bad karma to demand that life be all about your wants ...even in jest
 luckyhot777s
Joined: 12/26/2008
Msg: 68
Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/11/2010 9:20:07 AM
Dude, it is possible to find a compatibilty match here....the thing is in sense its a requirement of yours...you need to be upfront, they need to be upfront ...then is the information accurate?

Then lets say, you run into the right one and she needs it that often, then in time you don't need it as much, then she peaks and needs it more.

Then you will be no longer compatible, and she might cheat on you to get satisfied.

Of course this is not considering accidents or diseases which might effect things.

Either way, don't leave things to chance, simply put this in your profile and discussions before you meet, be sure to say, all others need not apply.

If this is a B.S. post..disregard all the advice given.
 Apollodorus
Joined: 11/24/2009
Msg: 69
Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/11/2010 10:09:38 AM

Doesn't that go both ways? If she needs to have more sleep/down time/time to work, shouldn't you, as someone who loves and cares for her


If this scenario came up what I would do is make sure there is a penciled in time my So wants going to sleep/down time and a penciled in time when I want sex that day. I will not give up my needs and deal breakers for anyone and as for being sick well then thats the only time sex can be put off to the next day but if my SO is constantly sick then thats a problem too.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 70
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Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/11/2010 10:25:11 AM

If this scenario came up what would do is make sure there is a penciled in time my So wants going to sleep/down time and a penciled in time when I want sex that day. I will not give up my needs and deal breakers for anyone and as for being sick well then thats the only time sex can be put off the next day but my So is constantly sick then thats a problem too.



put off till the next day

Oh how so very kind of you

Ya know.......I like sex too........alot!
I pretty much would like it everyday.
BUT.....sometimes life doesn't cooperate and things happen.
There is no way in hell I would commit myself to a man that had me fearful of him leaving if he had to go without sex for longer than a day.

I agree that constantly saying No is an issue.......I think everyone here agrees with that.
But Apollo......when everyone thinks your ideals are a bit much.......I would think one
would do some self analyzing and maybe realize your expectations are not realistic.
 deerdog1
Joined: 12/29/2006
Msg: 71
Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/11/2010 1:51:23 PM

A bunch of strangers from the internet that I do not know is not going make me re think my ideals or change my deal breakers


well if you do not value our opinion why are you on the forums .. either you are just someone who likes to argue for the sake of arguing or you are a troll..either way with a closed mind and the attitude you are presenting maybe forums are the only place that people will interact with you
either way I would not put too much stock in finding a woman who will put up with your crap ...you may well find a girl who will ..but little girls grow up

cheers
 Pingshooter
Joined: 3/15/2009
Msg: 72
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Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/11/2010 8:01:59 PM
Apollo..come on back to the real world when you grow up.
 luckyhot777s
Joined: 12/26/2008
Msg: 73
Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/12/2010 4:48:41 AM

I will not give up my needs and deal breakers for anyone and as for being sick well then thats the only time sex can be put off to the next day but if my SO is constantly sick then thats a problem too.


I don't always read all the responces to questions, and I didn't read where this all started and all it contains.

But I agree with sexual compatibility, its a very important part of a relation, and if we back track, we can see most agree upon that..

But, in a any relationship...there are going to be times someone isn't in the mood, or things come up, that make it not a reality that sex can be had. The "what ifs"...what if she/he is deployed to the war? what if he/she goes into the hospital? what if they meerly go on a vacation to see their parents, etc, etc, etc, etc, etc...surely you wouldn't leave them over that?

I think thats the point most are making here....yes, we want compatibility in sex and other things, but in the reality of life, things don't always go according to plan, or scedules...so we flow with that, have understanding and make the best of things.

On the same token, when time shows that two people have changed or one of them, and what was, will never be again...as in sex and the romance that goes along with it...many feel it is time to move on, but we are talking about a scenario where sickness or similar things are not the cause, but that they have changed, and nothing will correct that, and most stay well long enough till they have run out of resourses, and typically that is a bit of time.

Maybe you are refering to just a sexual relation here...the point others were making was involving love and a real relation...yes, it takes more than love for a relation or marriage to work, compatibilty and more comes into play...but you don't run out on love, because everything didn't go perfect.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 74
Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/12/2010 7:21:04 AM

Maybe you are refering to just a sexual relation here...the point others were making was involving love and a real relation...yes, it takes more than love for a relation or marriage to work, compatibilty and more comes into play...but you don't run out on love, because everything didn't go perfect.


And perhaps that is the key difference. Interestingly enough, those that profess that unless the woman must provide sex 20 or more times a week and those are deal breakers, tend to not have such partners all the time. Yet guys who are trying to work on relationships and instead of demanding sex tonight are saying, "can I help you fold some clothes and work on the dishes" are somehow getting more sex to the point that sexual fantasies are being lived, not imagined.

But to each their own.
 johndoe67-1
Joined: 4/13/2010
Msg: 75
Finding a girl with the same sex drive?
Posted: 5/12/2010 7:50:12 AM

you need to work on your attitude


come on back to the real world when you grow up.

Deerdog, Pingshooter, Luckyhot, MsMicki, Namrael, et al...

We're all being pretty reasonable here with Apollo. We might have higher sex drives and agree with him that you need to be sexually compatible (in frequency and activities) with a partner. And yes, we believe good sex is very, VERY important in order for that relationship to be successful. But where we lose him is that we live in the REAL WORLD and understand that 'sh*t happens' and that EVERY relationship needs some flexibility, along with compassion, compromise and understanding. Earlier in the thread I brought up that he wants kids. Can you imagine any couple having the time or energy for sex 3x a day with a newborn??? Every parent out there laughing at that 'requirement!' ... And thats even if he doesnt leave her during the 6 wks when she's not allowed to have sex due to childbirth.

So he's a lost cause. At 29, he's not going to grow out of his selfish, stubborn, unyielding, unreasonable, inflexible, unrealistic, adamant, obdurate attitude.
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