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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????      Home login  
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 CallmeKen
Joined: 9/4/2009
Msg: 64
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????Page 4 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

I was talking about the guys who CAN afford the ring and just don't want to bother

Watch 'Blood Roses and Deadly Diamonds: Vanguard' sometime.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2OJoyQOHf-Q
It will open your eyes to the GREAT deal of pain, suffering, and environmental damage done in the name of our silly little traditions.
 Fierysunlvr
Joined: 1/14/2010
Msg: 65
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Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/20/2010 10:59:45 PM
I've known women who got married without ever having received an engagement ring. At first they said they were being non materialistic and that a ring didn't mean love, the way they were treated everyday was what mattered. What happened with these women, was that later it just ate away at them that they didn't receive a ring. In both cases, the guy they married didn't treat them as if they were valued and appreciated.

I really think they man should buy the woman an engagement ring if he's serious about marrying her. It doesn't have to be expensive, but it should be some token of his love for her. Now, I also think its nice if the woman can return the gesture and buy the guy an engagement present as well. After my ex husband gave me my ring, I bought him a telescope he had been wanting, as my engagement present to him.
 NarcissusTemple
Joined: 4/23/2009
Msg: 66
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/21/2010 1:39:40 AM
I would settle for the cigar band if it were the right man...

Monica? Is that YOU???

(Clinton joke disclaimer...no harm was intended in the making of this joke.)

OT: If the guy stays home and takes care of the kid, I don't see the harm or shame in her supporting him.
 peppermint petunias
Joined: 9/2/2009
Msg: 67
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/21/2010 3:35:36 AM

If the guy stays home and takes care of the kid, I don't see the harm or shame in her supporting him.


Hey at 27-42 I would have loved that.. a huge stress would have been taken off of me.



I always said I needed a wife, cook and maid along with sitter..Whats the problem ?
..Buttonskis I tell ya!!



guess what my name is


And she says she isn't physic ....balderdash!!!

They left some .................left..lmaoooooooooo

 peppermint petunias
Joined: 9/2/2009
Msg: 68
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/21/2010 4:01:01 AM

Op many Ladies {and I use the term loosely} would consider that a sign of being cheap.
And many if you don't buy them a carrot Lol, or bigger they'll get very upset.

Does a piece of paper a ring getting married in front of a Padre going to determine
your love for the individual, NO.
Will your marriage last NO.
Does that mean he doesn't Love you NO.


What have we been saying???????????????/..I have had the rings..
THEY mean NOTHING.

I want some wheels..some cash..some real estate..IF he MUST spend money I can think of a multitude of other things I would rather have than some thing that is a useless vanity item that is easily lost and is worth 1/10th of what you pay for it.



Wearing 5 to 30 grand on my hand is asinine..right up there with a 2500 hand bag wtf??
MEN are the ones usually embarrassed over the size of the jewel in my experience NOT women.

Gawd go get a cubic zirconia fake 2 carat piece of junk and I will wear it in front of your friends at the super bowl party and you can brag about your jewels.

My first husband heard so much grief from his brothers and friends..when all I wanted was a band with ittty bitty emeralds in it I saw at an antique store he went out and bought a huge diamond to shut them up. It did not feel right with 2 rings on one finger.

I bet he was still paying on that "vacuum cleaner sucked up pressed carbon "after the divorce..
Lost gone..oodles of money.

Stop blaming the women..it's a lot of the men and insecurities THEY have.
 VivaciousVixen2010
Joined: 7/12/2008
Msg: 69
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/21/2010 4:11:40 AM
this is really weird
i have had men that have given rings been engaged
gave a pre engagement ring but spent every living moment together and lived together
been married husband never there
been considered engaged but no ring yet

i have felt through the end of all of these experiences, that if a man is serious
you will get an engagement ring. Get married. It is that simple. There won't be living together try and buy.
pre engagement crap.we are engaged but i want to wait until i can afford a nice ring
none of that matters
he will give you a ring
rings can always change
it is the sentiment behind it
it is a foundation
 motown cowgirl
Joined: 6/30/2010
Msg: 70
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/21/2010 5:16:12 AM
OP it's obvious that the tacit opinions of friends & acquaintances based on appearance and/or material things is of the utmost importance to you. your friend... not so much. so hey, it's good for everyone involved that he actually asked HER to marry him and not you.
 Paddy_o_Lantern
Joined: 12/9/2009
Msg: 71
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/21/2010 9:41:40 AM

I will wear it in front of your friends at the super bowl party and you can brag about your jewels.


Yes some men feel a need to be able to brag about their jewels maybe it's because something is lacking in the family jewels. Just like some men drive their car like it's and entension or a replacement for their penis....it takes all kinds
 Pingshooter
Joined: 3/15/2009
Msg: 72
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Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/21/2010 12:58:40 PM

...I can think of a multitude of other things I would rather have than some thing that is a useless vanity item that is easily lost and is worth 1/10th of what you pay for it.


http://www.youtube.com/watch#!v=HaHj4S7EcBU&feature=related

 Savona
Joined: 8/4/2010
Msg: 73
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/21/2010 1:45:51 PM
Sounds like the ring is as "amazing" as the relationship is.
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 74
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/21/2010 2:16:15 PM
And if he gets her just a "little" something. . . . . See: Can only afford $800 on an engagement ring - is that enough to spend in this day and age
http://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingPosts5506828.aspx

Some are going to be happy with what they have; some are not going to be happy with anything. Way of the world.

 SilentInk
Joined: 3/20/2010
Msg: 75
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/22/2010 12:23:19 PM
Yes because a ring is SO important. No wonder those million dollar rings I see pictured on covers of gossip magazines, with smiling celebrities with their million dollar smiles looking so 'in love' have such happy, strong, everlasting marriages....Oh wait! They don't. That alone should tell you how much a piece of jewelry matters. In the end of the day a ring really doesn't do jack.
 UwillLaff
Joined: 4/27/2010
Msg: 76
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/22/2010 12:30:27 PM
A ring is important. The symbolism of commitment is its design.
Its cost is not all that important.
Worrying what your friends think about its cost?
...screw that.
But a ring is important.
 Pingshooter
Joined: 3/15/2009
Msg: 77
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Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/22/2010 12:34:53 PM

...Yes the symbolism means a lot to us.. but price is tertiary..


I had to look that word up..

Symbolism does mean a lot to us, and I enjoyed wearing my simple gold band wedding ring.
 UwillLaff
Joined: 4/27/2010
Msg: 78
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/22/2010 6:35:04 PM
^ Exactly, my engagement ring was this monster Alexandrite my dad gave me when he was slumming around Northern India in the early 60's, set in a simple ring, it worked perfect. she got some grief from a few about it being nontraditional, we didn't care.
 bcsofnc57
Joined: 11/20/2007
Msg: 79
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/22/2010 8:27:33 PM
Did your friend give him a ring? I am betting she did not.

Why would any woman want an engagement ring? For sure it is a symbol, a symbol that means the woman is now property of the man. If it were a symbol of anything else, say that they were to be married at some point in the future, the man would also be given an engagement ring.

To me it makes more sense and has a lot more symbolic value to wait until the wedding and exchange two plain wedding bands. Perfect circles symbolizing eternity as the circle never ends.

What I find embarrassing is that some women are still willing to wear an engagement ring.

I can't help but wonder if he was the only one working and paying for everything, would everyone say she was using him, good chance most would not.

Maybe he should also be embarrassed and mad because she didn't buy him a ring.

Really it sounds like she has forced the so called engagement to take place. I say so called because it doesn't sound like it is what he wanted at all.
 luckyhot777s
Joined: 12/26/2008
Msg: 80
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/23/2010 4:17:47 AM
. . . . See: Can only afford $800 on an engagement ring - is that enough to spend in this day and age


The funny thing is a ring might cost $800.00....but whats it worth? Most times if the engagement ends, he doesn't get the ring back, she says....you gave it, I want to keep it.....then later its listed in the newspaper for around $300.00 dollars. Because you can't sell a second hand ring for the original price. Unless its a collector grade, which starts around three carats and high in the important numbers and no carbon or cracks.

Personally, I think this guy could have gotten a ring, it didn't have to expensive...but then, she might not want to show it off. But then, if it was really expensive with the right(wrong) person it could have an influence on the answer, if she wasn't sure.

In that case, they might be impressed with her ring, but be thinking....what a loser that guy is....
 tizzabelle
Joined: 8/20/2010
Msg: 81
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Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/23/2010 3:33:34 PM
wow three days is a long time to wait when one has things to say

Just from reading what the OP had to say on the first page my thought was... his Ex is still running the show and, he needs to get his balls back!

Family Justice offers free mediation, he could have gotten access and some other agreements worked out through them.

A part time/weekend parent is not required to have a separate room for the child.

My feeling is that the proposal was for the benefit of his Ex more than anything... why else would he have done it while out with both kids? Now junior can run back and tell mommy all about it.
 Paddy_o_Lantern
Joined: 12/9/2009
Msg: 82
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/23/2010 6:36:34 PM

she's paying for everything else relating to her relationship with him. He doesn't love her, he's marrying her for convenience.


Change the OP's story inserting man for woman in all referrences or even your post...

He's paying for everything else relating to his relationship with her.She doesn't love him, she's marrying him for convenience.

Would you have the same opinion or would it be ok if it was a woman treating a man like this?
 Diagnosis = C3rtifiabl3
Joined: 4/19/2010
Msg: 83
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/31/2010 5:39:12 AM
A ring is a materialistic item to show your friends and family what exactly??? just how much he loves you????? Uh, maybe its just me, but I always thought it was the little things that mattered..you know, actions speaking louder??

People put too much value on materialistic things when it comes to love & marriage, and unfortunately, this is why alot of marriages FAIL!@!

Along with others...if that were my friend, I'd be more concerned with why the hell she settled for someone who obviously sees her as a temporary fix/convenience and deliberately took every measure to ensure she'd stick around.
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 84
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/31/2010 7:06:11 AM
I don't understand why people are thinking the woman is materialistic
or whatever because she expected a ring. She didn't say she expected
a 10,000.00 ring, she didn't even say she expected a 50.00 ring. She
expected a ring, because in her mind tradionally you got a ring when you
became engaged. This is something her boyfriend should have known, or
if he wasn't sure it should have been discussed. There is nothing wrong with
NOT wanting a ring and there is certainly nothing wrong with wanting one.
If money is an issue, then discuss it. There are a lot of cheap rings out there,
maybe she was looking at it as a symbol more than expecting him to take on
a financial burden.

I've yet to see a marriage break up because someone either got a ring or didn't
for pete's sake.

She was disappointed...he could have fixed it if he chose to. So now they are
going down the path of not having a clue of what the other is about.
Now THAT is something that might cause a marriage to break up.
 Fresh fish is best fresh.
Joined: 7/29/2010
Msg: 85
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/31/2010 7:35:31 AM
Around here, if all you going to spend is 10,000 then you should prepared for her to say no when you ask her to marry you. As I have said before, if she wants a sparkling diamond she can buy her own, and if she can't afford what she is looking for, then she would not be marriage material to me to begin with. Who wants to marry down after all? Instead of marrying up. I would rather spend the money on a fancy lawn tractor and a new fridge, tv, bar, for the garage.
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 86
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/31/2010 9:44:10 AM
^^^^what does any of that have to to with the topic?
If you would rather spend your money on a fancy lawn
tractor, a new fridge, tv, or bar for your garage, tell her
that. No one is talking about sparkling diamonds. Wanting
a token of an engagement does not have to cost a bunch of
money. We're not talking about "around here" or your personal
issues, we're talking about the OP's question and was she out
of line to expect a ring.
 Fresh fish is best fresh.
Joined: 7/29/2010
Msg: 87
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/31/2010 9:51:22 AM
"Wanting a token of an engagement does not have to cost a bunch of
money. We're not talking about "around here" or your personal
issues, we're talking about the OP's question and was she out
of line to expect a ring."

Sorry, down here, it costs a lots and lots of money, and she is way out of line for expecting anything period to begin with, she should feel lucky that someone thinks of her well enough to want to ruin their life, oops I mean get married with her. What is with all this entitlement thinking? To me a token of engagement could easily be a new vacuum cleaner for that matter, or maybe a few oxen, chickens and pigs, after all engagement and marriage are nothing more than business agreements, after all you have to get a license to get married. A dead grasshopper glued to a plastic band could then be considered a token of engagement then. If we are only speaking of tokens of engagement.
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 88
Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????
Posted: 8/31/2010 9:52:34 AM

Sorry, down here, it costs a lots and lots of money, and she is way out of line for expecting anything period to begin with, she should feel lucky that someone thinks of her well enough to want to ruin their life, oops I mean get married with her. What is with all this entitlement thinking? To me a token of engagement could easily be a new vacuum cleaner for that matter, or maybe a few oxen, chickens and pigs, after all engagement and marriage are nothing more than business agreements, after all you have to get a license to get married.


jeepers, you're fricken hilarious.
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Will you marry me? but then he gives her no ring????