|strange behavoirPage 2 of 2 (1, 2)|
|OP I think you are a Major Primadonna, and you expect the chicken to kill itself, cook itself, lay in your plate , and wish you Bon-Apetit too.|
Can't you just pick up the phone and call the woman? Do you expect her to beg you or something?
WTF is wrong with you!!!
Posted: 9/16/2010 12:10:25 PM
|He did not deliver and she went home puzzled as to why he did not want to have sex with her. I know people here like to deny it, but there is one hell of a large community of people, both male and female, who hook up for one night stands on weekends. It is not evil, just people wanting to have a good time with no strings.|
Posted: 9/16/2010 12:16:50 PM
|^ I doubt it. I don't think it's because he didn't deliver, more leaning towards the ball was in her court and she didn't want to take it there yet.|
What does seem rational is if a person drives to your neck of the woods, it's courteous to call or at least text and see if they made it home safe. The OP expects her to drive down to where he is, then takes her to some lame party, then pounces on her...and then he wants her to call? Oh please OP grow some, pick up the phone and call her. Makes no sense why she has to call you, and why you think she is not being 'real' because she hasn't made that call yet. Sheesh.
Posted: 9/16/2010 12:35:00 PM
|Unspoken expectations cause a tremendous amount of trouble. |
Something I've seen over and over again, is that MANY people believe that "Everyone knows that one should do thus and such." They go about their lives assuming that everyone they meet will behave as they expect. Here again, the OP assumes that this woman would make the next contact. Perhaps she's making the same mistake, for the same reason.
It doesn't end with "who makes the next move" assumptions either. The forums and the real world at large are filled with people complaining that they expected the OTHER person to pay for this or that as part of the date, to share costs of cabs, to give gifts to relatives, to call after a trip, to ask before doing something, and on and on.
I've pledged myself to avoid making assumptions, and to refuse to allow others to make them against me. Communication is the key here, and in general.
So, OP, if you want to know what is or is not going on with someone, ASK THEM.
Posted: 9/16/2010 2:55:45 PM
|every time you think somebody "should" do something, an a s s hole gets his wings.|
if you want to talk to her, pick up the damn phone.
Posted: 9/16/2010 5:16:31 PM
|I'm going with Msg 18 and the bouncy ball. |
Now,,,,,I'm gonna have another drink.
Holy freakin mary and joseph,,,what is going on out there with you people. OP?????? You spent enough time typing your scenario about this "supposed" strange behavoir,,,,but you still haven't found the time to call her????? HELLO!!!!!!!!????????
Posted: 9/16/2010 5:26:27 PM
she left the next day and never heard from her again Really, wow how strange that you contacted her in the first place, saw her online, and yet you can't contact her. That is strange behavior indeed!
Posted: 9/16/2010 5:36:35 PM
|My opinion is your a dope!|
Saying "she would like to meet up with me again." is not the same as "I'll call you, I would like to meet up with you again."
EVEN in Manhattan, original home of the independent aggressive woman, there are many who expect a man to take the lead in the beginning. Why you wouldn't have called her the next day, is beyond me.
Maybe as one poster said she was drunk, how the he11 do we know. But more than likely, she expected you to call. That you didn't she figured you "weren't that into her" and moved on. I frankly don't get all the people on this site with expectations that they are THAT special that normal dating norms should be suspended, because it's THEM!
Wake up Sean, it maybe too late for this one, don't let it happen again.
Posted: 9/16/2010 7:02:38 PM
|She is probably thinking the same way you are. If you were interested why did you not call or text or contact her in any way after the fact?|
Posted: 9/16/2010 8:43:49 PM
Your opinion....Are ya sure ya want it?
You live in NYC, have a woman you barely know come to visit you from who knows where, you get sloshed at your friend's party, get kissy-kissy, get a hotel room, she leaves, and . . .
. . . YOU DON'T CALL HER TO SEE IF SHE GOT HOME OK? Are ya brain-dead? Shy (but not shy enough to grope a woman who you barely know)?? Clueless?? You expect HER to contact YOU?
You think she's sending YOU a message by not contacting you? WHAT?? The only message being sent here is that you are too lazy to meet the lady on her turf, then you're too lazy to care if she got home ok.
Is this a serious post? All I see is idiotic comedy here.
Posted: 9/16/2010 8:48:19 PM
|^ Indeed. Some men just shouldn't date.|
Posted: 9/16/2010 9:44:14 PM
|First off, I've always assumed that this was a frog, not a ball. Hmmmm.|
Yeah, you're a 32 year old self-proclaimed "single", yet had to procure a hotel room for the lady? Uh huh.
I think you should just man the hell up and give her a call. If, of course, your wife let's you.
Good luck :)
Posted: 9/16/2010 11:30:02 PM
|she was interested in getting laid !!|
she came to you ok but why make her feel uncomfortable with ppl she hasn't even met or make an idiot out of yourself
when ppl drink or at party's they act different then alone.....she seen the true u i guess.....
hmm motel room no sex...wierd maybe she is married,or u r
if she seen lots of red flags then your just another date and she is moving on !!
thats why no texts or messages....
Posted: 9/17/2010 7:18:47 AM
|I think she was INITIALLY waiting for a follow up from you - but by now she's probably come to the conclusion that you are a selfish, selfcentered, azz. Leave her be - let her grow to loathe you. You really deserve no better. |
Posted: 9/17/2010 8:05:50 AM
|As a ex New yorker myself the Op has shamed me. Hopefully the woman was smart enough to have moved on by now and a over due phone call from the Op will be much to little much too late. |
I can't help but notice that the Op has pulled a whodini since he started this silly thread, guess that will happen when you start a thread titled " strange behavior" directed at your date, only to find it's you that's acting like you're cocoo for coco puffs.
Posted: 9/17/2010 8:18:30 AM
|^ Yes indeed the OP is obviously not good at following up on things. Can't follow up with a phone call on his date nor can he follow up on this thread. Damn shame too because he would benefit from reading everything the folk of the POF land had to say.|
Posted: 9/17/2010 2:05:46 PM
|maybe she's been thinking the same thing about you = that as you haven't called/texted her you're not interested... after all, she came to *your* town for you, seems like you could meet her half way in other ways...|
Posted: 9/17/2010 2:32:05 PM
Dude...you practically ran face-first into all the signs and didn't stop to read a single one of them!!! The girl probably thinks you’re a ‘door knob’
Posted: 9/17/2010 6:04:35 PM
|Sounds like you didn't call her, either.|
I agree with the other posters. Sounds like you need to learn how to treat a lady.
Posted: 9/18/2010 5:06:34 AM
|it only took me 2 days to notice that OP's actual profile headline is "come to me".|
how funny is that?
but really, why shouldn't she? yes she should come to him, initiate each and every single phone call/email/meeting, drive who knows how many miles to get there, hold up both ends of the conversation, fix him a sandwich, and give him a good snarling too while she's at it. because he's a music producer, designer and investor (probably even an international man of intrigue, but too modest to include that part). so if that doesn't translate to some guy d1cking around with Youtube and Myspace all day while he builds his empire selling goatse t-shirts to French perverts on the the internet, then yes indeed, all women should be driving miles just to come to him.
Posted: 9/18/2010 5:31:52 AM
|""You missed your window.""|
Hell, he missed the window, the door, the whole freaken house. He missed the damn street the house was on.
We won't be calling you Rico Suave', not anytime soon. You're not to smooth OP.
Posted: 9/22/2010 12:47:30 PM
Unless your fingers were broken, you should have called if you wanted to get together again.
Posted: 9/23/2010 4:06:11 PM
YOU DON'T CALL HER TO SEE IF SHE GOT HOME OK? Are ya brain-dead? Shy (but not shy enough to grope a woman who you barely know)?? Clueless?? You expect HER to contact YOU?
Bikeman said almost word-for-word what I think. Is it fair that the guy usually makes the call after the date? No. Is it the way it is? Yes. If you like this girl enough to keep seeing her, I think you need to do some grovelling. Let her know you enjoyed being with her, apologize for being too stupid to call and offer to take her out on a real date. If she hasn't already written you off as completely clueless, you just might get a second chance.
And in the future, remember to always call the day after a date.
Posted: 9/23/2010 4:47:45 PM
Let her know you enjoyed being with her, apologize for being too stupid to call and offer to take her out on a real date. If she hasn't already written you off as completely clueless, you just might get a second chance.
And in the future, remember to always call the day after a date
Agreed! Life is short & being alone,if you wish to love imitatively is in your cards,then that is even shorter then short.... lol
To waste time is to waste knowing & loving,let alone wondering.
So hopefully your deck is still open or if it is done,& the chase is over & ...fold.....
Join the fora etc & rem about the days you had but don't say why your done now......
shzt happens I guess,& if your hand has been not ready, to take the chance to bet,then just fold .Many of the folks do it here so you won't be short of company & their stories of ..........................lol